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Oh Me, Oh Mãe

Imitating B Inspecting Dirt On The Floor (21st March 2021)

Me low to the ground in a stripey dress touching a piece of dirt on the carpet.
Imitating B Inspecting Dirt On The Floor (21st March 2021)
 
#NothingGetsPastBTheseDays
#EspeciallyAnyBitOfDirtOnTheFloorThatSheIsQuickToPickUp
#SheIsSoFastAndWeBreatheASighOfReliefWhenSheSitsStillForAMinute
#ThisWeekHasBeenMyBusiestWeekSinceSheWasBornIThink
#AndOfCourseItCoincidedWithBsFirstToothStartingToCutThroughHerGums
#ItIsDay6AndIDoNotThinkItHasBrokenTheSurfaceYet
#AWomanAtTheParkSaidItCanTakeUpToAMonthForAToothToFullyAppear
#WeHaveStartedToBrushBsTeethOrRatherGumsToGetHerUsedToUsDoingIt
#HerToothpasteIsFor0To2YearOldsButItSaysTheyShouldSpitItOut
#BHasBeenLaughingAtMeShowingHerHowToSpitItOutButIDoNotThinkItMattersThatMuch
#HerNapsHaveGenerallyBeenALotShorterAndSheUsuallyWakesUpAt6amNow
#IHaveBeenWorkingUntil11ishQuiteALotButThenItTakesSoLongForMyBrainToSwitchOff
#WeManagedOneEpisodeOfAShowForDateNightLastNightThenWeWentToBedAt10
#IAmDreadingTheClocksChangingNextWeekendThoughIAmLookingForwardToLighterEvenings
#YesterdayIHadPortfolioReviewsAndWorkWorkToDoSoTiagoLookedAfterBForMostOfTheDay
#IWasReadingSomethingAboutTheSuccessOfAFemaleArtistAfterHavingKidsSeemsToCorrelateToHowSupportiveTheirPartnerIs
#IFeelLuckyThatTiagoIsSupportiveOfItAllAsOtherwiseItWouldBeHarderToGetThingsDone
#ForTheNextMonthOrSoIWillBeOutALotMoreWorkingWhichMeansLessTimeForMyOwnStuffSoWeWillSeeHowThatAllGoes
#AKidAtTheParkTheOtherDayCameOverAndStartedToPushBInTheSwing
#SheDidNotKnowWhatToMakeOfItAndIWasAlsoABitUnsureOfWhatToDo
#IDoNowKnowHowToTalkToKids
#TheOtherDayICriedAsIHadQuiteATenderMomentWithB
#SheWasInspectingMyFingersWithGreatCareAndWasLaughingAtMeRaisingMyEyebrowsUpAndDown
#SheAlsoHasANewCheekyGrinWhichIsSuperAdorable
#SheLikesToPlayWithTheBalloonsThatWeBlewUpForOneOfHerBabyClasses
#SheIsYetToUnderstandThatTheyCanPopAndIAmNotLookingForwardToTheDayThatTheyDo
#RecentlySheWasReallyDiggingHerFingersIntoItAndIHatedTheNoise
#IQuicklyPutMyHandsOverMyEarsAndSheAlsoFoundThatHilarious
#INeedToDoSomeResearchIntoWhatSoundsAllAnimalsMake
#ForExampleWhatSoundDoesAGiraffeMake

#NothingGetsPastBTheseDays

I feel like I have a completely different baby to a month ago.

#EspeciallyAnyBitOfDirtOnTheFloorThatSheIsQuickToPickUp

Though I do love when she goes for the tiny hole in the kitchen floor that she thinks is dirt, but obviously can’t pick up.

#SheIsSoFastAndWeBreatheASighOfReliefWhenSheSitsStillForAMinute

Tiago looked after her a lot yesterday and said that she never stops. I was like ‘welcome to my week’.

#ThisWeekHasBeenMyBusiestWeekSinceSheWasBornIThink

Still got plenty to do, but it’ll be fine.

#AndOfCourseItCoincidedWithBsFirstToothStartingToCutThroughHerGums #ItIsDay6AndIDoNotThinkItHasBrokenTheSurfaceYet

It felt so sharp the other day, but looking at it I do not think it has come through yet. It must be horrible. Bless B.

#AWomanAtTheParkSaidItCanTakeUpToAMonthForAToothToFullyAppear

Great.

#WeHaveStartedToBrushBsTeethOrRatherGumsToGetHerUsedToUsDoingIt

I wasn’t looking forward to it, but she does not seem to mind much.

#HerToothpasteIsFor0To2YearOldsButItSaysTheyShouldSpitItOut

Lol. Imagine trying to get a 4 month old to spit it out (B is 9 months and she does not get it yet).

#BHasBeenLaughingAtMeShowingHerHowToSpitItOutButIDoNotThinkItMattersThatMuch

She has seen us brush our teeth with an electric toothbrush so when we brush hers or I pretend to brush mine I make the sound of one. I think she finds me going ‘blergh’ more funny though. The other night she would not stop laughing.

#HerNapsHaveGenerallyBeenALotShorterAndSheUsuallyWakesUpAt6amNow

Yesterday Tiago was looking forward to her naps; she slept for half an hour both times. She has been sleeping okay through the night, though last night she did wake up at 11 briefly.

#IHaveBeenWorkingUntil11ishQuiteALotButThenItTakesSoLongForMyBrainToSwitchOff

I have been falling asleep after 12 most nights, except for last night when I actually was asleep when she woke up. Typical.

#WeManagedOneEpisodeOfAShowForDateNightLastNightThenWeWentToBedAt10

We’ve been watching Through Her Eyes. We watched 2 episodes last weekend, then hadn’t watched it again until last night. Tiago has given me the go ahead to watch it by myself though, as I think he is a little freaked out/can’t be bothered to watch it. I have started to watch a lot of TV on 1.5x while doing work…

#IAmDreadingTheClocksChangingNextWeekendThoughIAmLookingForwardToLighterEvenings

I get confused by it all every time though. Thinking about it the old 6am will be 7am, so the first night might not be great (hello super early bedtime) but it could be worse. We’ll see…

#YesterdayIHadPortfolioReviewsAndWorkWorkToDoSoTiagoLookedAfterBForMostOfTheDay

I hope more things stay online after the pandemic is over. It was so much more convenient to be at home with a digital portfolio. One reviewer said she wouldn’t have been able to go to the physical reviews as she has kids to look after.

They seemed to go well and were generally positive. It seems worth noting that I only had female reviewers.

#IWasReadingSomethingAboutTheSuccessOfAFemaleArtistAfterHavingKidsSeemsToCorrelateToHowSupportiveTheirPartnerIs

I guess it makes sense.

#IFeelLuckyThatTiagoIsSupportiveOfItAllAsOtherwiseItWouldBeHarderToGetThingsDone

It’s 9.15am and this morning he’s been looking after B so I could do dance videos, do a shoot and now my hashtags and blog. B is just going down for a nap, so I hope she sleeps well. I need to do some ‘work work’ after this, but I want to make sure that Tiago has some time for his own stuff today too.

I still feel guilty about T looking after her so much, but B doesn’t see him that much during the week so it’s nice for them to spend some quality time together.

#ForTheNextMonthOrSoIWillBeOutALotMoreWorkingWhichMeansLessTimeForMyOwnStuffSoWeWillSeeHowThatAllGoes

My Mum and Tiago will be looking after her while I’m doing it. I’m looking forward to getting out more, but I worry about fitting everything in. I know it’ll be fine though.

#AKidAtTheParkTheOtherDayCameOverAndStartedToPushBInTheSwing

We had been talking to some earlier about a car, which he said was a tractor.

#SheDidNotKnowWhatToMakeOfItAndIWasAlsoABitUnsureOfWhatToDo

He had a lot of spit on his hands and B had a runny nose – fun for Covid times.

#IDoNowKnowHowToTalkToKids

I guess as B gets older I’ll figure it out, and hopefully we’ll start to hang out with more kids soon.

#TheOtherDayICriedAsIHadQuiteATenderMomentWithB

I just had to check that that was the right term.

#SheWasInspectingMyFingersWithGreatCareAndWasLaughingAtMeRaisingMyEyebrowsUpAndDown

She was sat in her high chair and it was just really sweet. I love making her laugh.

#SheAlsoHasANewCheekyGrinWhichIsSuperAdorable

I should probably imitate it for a future shoot.

(15th April: It’s the next post.)

#SheLikesToPlayWithTheBalloonsThatWeBlewUpForOneOfHerBabyClasses

She also laughs when I throw one up and enthusiastically catch it. I have a lot of fun just kicking them about and playing volleyball with them.

#SheIsYetToUnderstandThatTheyCanPopAndIAmNotLookingForwardToTheDayThatTheyDo

I am worried that it might hurt her and she will get really freaked out.

#RecentlySheWasReallyDiggingHerFingersIntoItAndIHatedTheNoise

Ergh.

#IQuicklyPutMyHandsOverMyEarsAndSheAlsoFoundThatHilarious

I live to make her laugh. Once I learn how to talk to kids I might become a kid’s entertainer…

#INeedToDoSomeResearchIntoWhatSoundsAllAnimalsMake #ForExampleWhatSoundDoesAGiraffeMake

I end up singing that ‘What Does The Fox Say?‘ song from time to time as B has a fox toy and a few books that reference foxes. I just remember hearing them mate in London a lot and that wasn’t very nice…

People like to use animals for things that aren’t really known for their noises. If in doubt a lot of animals roar, and most birds tweet, but what does a moose say? A lot of them become Pokemon in my mind as in a toucan says tou-can, and a moose says moooose.


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Categories
Oh Me, Oh Mãe

First Trip On A Train In A Year (16th March 2021)

(11th April – Yeah the photo is boring, but it felt like a big moment.)

First Time On A Train In A Year (16th March 2021)

#TodayINeededToGoToBirminghamCityCentreToShowThatIAmActuallyWhoISayIAmForATemporaryJob
#IBelieveThatIHadNotBeenOnATrainSince16thMarch2020ButThatSeemsABitTooMuchOfACoincidenceToBeTrue
#IHadNotBeenToBirminghamNewStreetStationSinceJanuary2020AndIHadNotWalkedAroundBrumSinceSometimeIn2019
#IGotToMyLocalStationSuperEarlyAsIGuessIAmUsedToAimingToLeaveEarlierThanUsualWhenIActuallyNeedToBeSomewhereWithB
#HoweverTodayIWasByMyselfAndItWasOdd
#BWasNotInAGoodMoodBeforeILeftButLuckilySheKnowsMyMumWellSoWasHappyClingingToHer
#TheTicketMachineSeemedToBeOutOfOrderSoIHadToGoToTheTicketCounter
#WhenIWasAboutToPayHeOpenedUpHisHatchAndForSomeReasonIThoughtIHadToGiveHimMyCard
#HePointedToTheCardMachineWhichIHadAlreadyNoticedBeforeAndIFeltABitEmbarrassed
#ThePriceSeemedLowerThanIThoughtItWouldBeSoIMadeSureThatHeDidNotGiveMeAChildTicket
#ThinkingAboutItAfterwardsItDidSoundLikeTheRightPriceButIPaidTheSameInLiverpoolForOneStopAndAFewMinutesTrainRide
#ISatOnABenchAndWatchedAFastTrainGoPastWhichFreakedMeOutABit
#MyCarriageWasEmptyButIStillManagedToGetTerriblePhotosOfMyExperience
#ThisRemindsMeOfWhenITookPhotosOfMeInASupermarketAsIHadNotBeenInOneFor6Months
#WellWhenIGotOffTheTrainTodayIWentIntoASupermarketAndGotMyselfAMealDeal
#ThenISatInVictoriaSquareAndRememberedHowAwkwardItIsToEatInPublic
#SomeYoungWomenWereShoutingKillTheBillAndIAdmiredTheirEnergy
#IWasAlreadyFeelingTiredAsIStayedUpTooLateLastNightSkippingThroughAllTheEpisodesOfTheCelebrityCircle
#ThatFeelsDumbToSayAfterTalkingAboutPeopleProtestingButItIsTheTruth
#MyMeetingWentFineAndIHaveLotsOfStuffToGetOnWithNow
#IRanForAnEarlierTrainHomeAsICouldNotBeBotheredToSitOnThePlatformForAgesAndThereWasNowhereElseToGo
#ItFeltSoOddRunningThroughTheCityCentreAndTrainStation
#IThoughtIWouldGetToldOffOrSomethingThoughIDoNotKnowWhy
#IWoreAMaskForTheLongestAmountOfTimeTodaySinceTheFirstLockdownStartedWhichSeemsABitLate
#ISawLotsOfDucksOnTheWayHomeFromTheStationAndItMadeMeMissBAsUsuallyIPointThemOutToHer
#GotHomeAndMyMumAskedIfIHadRanHome
#MaybeILookedRedOrPerhapsIWasEarlierThanSheExpected
#SheSaidThatAtLunchBHadBeenTryingToChewToastButWasCryingOutAsSheTriedToDoSo
#LaterOnIFeltABitOfASharpToothStartingToStickOutOfHerBottomGum
#TodayIWasTheFurthestAwayThatIHaveEverBeenAwayFromHerAndThoughItWasNiceToBeByMyselfForABitIWouldHaveRatherBeenWithHer

Got to keep this short. Got to keep this brief. Too much stuff to do and I probably shouldn’t have prioritised this. Whoops.

#TodayINeededToGoToBirminghamCityCentreToShowThatIAmActuallyWhoISayIAmForATemporaryJob

Makes sense. I could be totally catfishing an employer…

#IBelieveThatIHadNotBeenOnATrainSince16thMarch2020ButThatSeemsABitTooMuchOfACoincidenceToBeTrue

It seems weird that it may have actually been an exact year. 16th March 2020 was a Monday and I’m pretty sure I was not feeling too great that day, so I said I’d next go into the office (where I did some part-time work) maybe a few days later but by the time I got home I found out that pregnant women were classed as high risk.

#IHadNotBeenToBirminghamNewStreetStationSinceJanuary2020AndIHadNotWalkedAroundBrumSinceSometimeIn2019

In January 2020 I just passed through to change trains to go to my Nan’s. Not sure when the last time I actually walked around Brum city was…

#IGotToMyLocalStationSuperEarlyAsIGuessIAmUsedToAimingToLeaveEarlierThanUsualWhenIActuallyNeedToBeSomewhereWithB

I’ve walked past it with B before on the way to baby classes in December. With B I’m usually a bit slower as I have to push her, and sometimes it is more of a leisurely pace.

#HoweverTodayIWasByMyselfAndItWasOdd

I’ve been looking forward to this trip for a while let’s face it, but it felt so odd to be by myself.

#BWasNotInAGoodMoodBeforeILeftButLuckilySheKnowsMyMumWellSoWasHappyClingingToHer

I thought she must be teething badly again. I felt bad leaving her, but I needed to go.

#TheTicketMachineSeemedToBeOutOfOrderSoIHadToGoToTheTicketCounter

I was working myself up to touch the darn machine and it was out of order. I used a lot of hand sanitiser today.

#WhenIWasAboutToPayHeOpenedUpHisHatchAndForSomeReasonIThoughtIHadToGiveHimMyCard #HePointedToTheCardMachineWhichIHadAlreadyNoticedBeforeAndIFeltABitEmbarrassed

Lol. Awkward. I was going to go say something, but I couldn’t be bothered.

#ThePriceSeemedLowerThanIThoughtItWouldBeSoIMadeSureThatHeDidNotGiveMeAChildTicket

So he thought I was more odd.

#ThinkingAboutItAfterwardsItDidSoundLikeTheRightPriceButIPaidTheSameInLiverpoolForOneStopAndAFewMinutesTrainRide

I rarely pay for anything face to face these days, and yeah I temporarily forgot how much a train ticket costs.

#ISatOnABenchAndWatchedAFastTrainGoPastWhichFreakedMeOutABit

It seemed so… fast.

#MyCarriageWasEmptyButIStillManagedToGetTerriblePhotosOfMyExperience

I even took along a tripod for my phone, but felt awkward with the CCTV camera at the end of the carriage.

#ThisRemindsMeOfWhenITookPhotosOfMeInASupermarketAsIHadNotBeenInOneFor6Months

Yeah those photos were fairly bad. This project has evolved a bit, but as I have been making work throughout the pandemic I thought I should still talk about some of this stuff.

#WellWhenIGotOffTheTrainTodayIWentIntoASupermarketAndGotMyselfAMealDeal

Yes, speaking of supermarkets. It is sad that I do miss them so much. Tiago usually does our food shopping and due to rules we don’t go with him.

I was thinking what food I could get, but I felt overwhelmed by choice. I regretted my veggie wrap decision, but I enjoyed prawn cocktail crisps.

(This is top quality boring stuff for sure.)

#ThenISatInVictoriaSquareAndRememberedHowAwkwardItIsToEatInPublic

I thought about a time when I spent ages choosing somewhere to eat a sandwich before an improv class when I lived in London. In the end I chose an area that seemed quite quiet, and as I went to take a big bite I looked up and saw a male photographer taking a photo of me.

It then reminded me of a time in France when a guy was trying to get a picture of me applying suncream, and he was so close up that it was probably a bust shot. I kept turning around whenever he picked his camera up and I said no. He was getting annoyed with me, but I said no. Then he walked off and tried to take a picture of me from further away. Some things I missed from my memories post.

(11th April: I’ve also been thinking lately about the horrible male orthodontist that I had when I was a teenager. He used to accuse me of not wearing my retainer and would tighten it SUPER tight. For the record I always wore the darn thing (especially as I did not want him to tighten it so much), and now I’m older I think that he might have just been abusing his position of power to cause unnecessary pain. Maybe he didn’t and my teeth were (and still are) genuinely rubbish, but I do wonder about it.)

#SomeYoungWomenWereShoutingKillTheBillAndIAdmiredTheirEnergy

It felt like an alternate universe of sorts for me.

#IWasAlreadyFeelingTiredAsIStayedUpTooLateLastNightSkippingThroughAllTheEpisodesOfTheCelebrityCircle

I didn’t realise they were only going to be online for another 14 hours, so I just had to skim through them for the good bits. The channel 4 app needs to have 1.5x button like Netflix.

#ThatFeelsDumbToSayAfterTalkingAboutPeopleProtestingButItIsTheTruth

I should have gone to bed earlier. I’m feeling it now.

#MyMeetingWentFineAndIHaveLotsOfStuffToGetOnWithNow

But I’m writing this and I’m not keeping it brief like I said.

#IRanForAnEarlierTrainHomeAsICouldNotBeBotheredToSitOnThePlatformForAgesAndThereWasNowhereElseToGo

I would have loved to go to a museum or gallery, but no they’re not open until mid-May?!

#ItFeltSoOddRunningThroughTheCityCentreAndTrainStation #IThoughtIWouldGetToldOffOrSomethingThoughIDoNotKnowWhy

I don’t know why it felt so wrong. I kept away from people. I guess I just felt weird running in a mask.

#IWoreAMaskForTheLongestAmountOfTimeTodaySinceTheFirstLockdownStartedWhichSeemsABitLate

I didn’t even bother taking it off after my meeting until I left my local station.

#ISawLotsOfDucksOnTheWayHomeFromTheStationAndItMadeMeMissBAsUsuallyIPointThemOutToHer

I took terrible photos of them instead and showed her them when I got home.

#GotHomeAndMyMumAskedIfIHadRanHome #MaybeILookedRedOrPerhapsIWasEarlierThanSheExpected

I was earlier than I had said. I walked fast from the station too.

#SheSaidThatAtLunchBHadBeenTryingToChewToastButWasCryingOutAsSheTriedToDoSo

🙁

#LaterOnIFeltABitOfASharpToothStartingToStickOutOfHerBottomGum

It really didn’t feel nice. Will we have a tooth tomorrow? Will B sleep well? I hope it’s a yes to both, though I’m not looking forward to brushing her tooth.

#TodayIWasTheFurthestAwayThatIHaveEverBeenAwayFromHerAndThoughItWasNiceToBeByMyselfForABitIWouldHaveRatherBeenWithHer

Cheesy but true. It just seemed so odd being away from her. I passed women with babies and it felt odd to smile at them without B.

Time to do some work…


Thanks for reading! If you’re enjoying my blog (and/or the work I make) please consider supporting me by ‘buying me a coffee’ on Ko-fi – thanks!