Categories
Pregnancy Waiting II

Documenting My Bump From A Different Angle (27 Weeks / 2nd November 2021)

Self-portrait sat on floor. My feet are out in front touching each other, and my hands are clasping my bump. The image is shot from above.
Documenting My Bump From A Different Angle (27 Weeks / 2nd November 2021)
 
#IAmYetToDoTheShootButIImagineItWillBeSomeAboveShotOfMyBumpAsWhenIExerciseILookDownAndThinkThatIsWhatIWantToPhotograph
#IThinkBabyXMayBeMoreActiveThanBWasAsWhenIWasPregnantWithBIWasOftenJustSatByMyselfNotMakingMuchNoise
#NowAllDayIAmTalkingToBAndSingingToHerAndReadingHerBooksSoSheProbablyReactsToTheNoiseALot
#HoweverSheDoesKickOrPunchMeALotWhenIAmInBedAndItIsQuiteQuietSoMaybeSheIsMoreActive
#IAmAlreadyStrugglingToPutMySocksOnButIRealisedAsBWasASummerBabyIJustWoreSandalsOutsideButAsBabyXIsAWinterBabyINeedToWearSocks
#IUsuallyWearTiagosShoesIfHeIsNotComingOutWithUsAsTheyAreEasierToJustSlipOnAndOff
#WeSurvivedTheClockChangeThoughIDidWakeUpAndNoticeTheClockWasOffSoThoughtItHadFreakedOut
#ThenIRealisedTheElectricityHadGoneOffSoIWentToPlayWithTheFuseBoxAt2InTheMorningAsIWasWorriedAboutTheFreezerDefrosting
#IUsedAWoodenSpatulaAsIWasWorriedAboutGettingAnElectricShockAndEverythingCameBackOn
#IWasLookingForwardToTheOvenFinallyHavingTheRightTimeOnItButThenISetItAs8InsteadOf6SoIHadToTurnItOffFor15MinutesAndTryAgain
#BWokeUpAt5ButSheIsAlreadyAdaptingThoughLastNightSheWasAwakeFor3HoursBetween12And3AsSheWasProbablyTeethingAndIsGoingThroughALeap
#InOtherNewsBHasBeenOfferedAPlaceForNursery
#SheHasASettlingInHourSessionThisWeekThenAnHourAndAHalfOneNextWeekAndThenSheStarts
#IFeelGuiltyAboutItAndIFeelLikeABitOfAFailureAsAStayAtHomeMum
#ButAtTheSameTimeIThinkItWillBeGoodForHerEspeciallyWhenBabyXComesAlongAndIWillBeTiredAndHaveLessEnthusiasm
#ItIsOnlyForACoupleOfHalfDaysAWeekAndRealisticallyIWillProbablyPickHerUpEarly
#IThinkSheWillLikeItThereAndItWillGiveMeABitMoreTimeToOrganiseMyselfBeforeBabyXIsBornAndThenIKnowIHaveABitOfTimeEachWeekWhereIOnlyHaveToLookAfterOneKid
#UltimatelyIThinkItIsTheBestThingForUsAsAFamilyAndIFeelLikeItIsStartingAtTheRightTime
#MyParentsLookedAfterBForTheFirstTimeTheOtherDayAndItGaveMeATasteOfHowItMightBe
#WeDroppedHerOffAfterBreakfastAndThenWeStayedABitToMakeSureSheWasAlright
#ThenWeWentHomeAndDidABitOfWorkThenWentOutForLunchWhereTheySaidThatTheyCouldNotServeTheDishOfTheDayYetAsTheyWereABitBehind
#IJustMadeACommentAboutHowWeWereTooKeenAsItWasOurFirstLunchDateWithoutOurDaughterAndSoHeSaidHeWouldMakeASmallBatch
#TheDelayMeantWeHadSomeTimeToTalkAndItWasNiceToFeelLikeWeAreNotJustParentsInTheNicestWayPossible
#OnTheWayHomeIFeltColdAndMyBumpWasTooBigToDoTheZipOfMyCoatUpSoWeHadToSwapCoatsAndIThinkTiagoMayBeBorrowingMyCoatForAWhileNow
#AtHomeWeWatchedAlmostOneEpisodeOfAmericanCrimeStoryThenHadANapThenWentToPickHerUp
#IThinkMyTimeWillLookVeryDifferentToThatWhileBIsAtNurseryButIGuessIMightRestALittleBitSometimesThoughIWillProbablyFeelGuiltyForDoingThat
#ItIsGoodToKnowThatBCanHappilySpendTheDayWithMyParentsThoughAsSoonTheyWillBeHavingHerForAnOvernightStay
#IGuessThisIsAllGoodPreparationAsTheyWillProbablyHaveToLookAfterHerWhileIAmInHospitalGivingBirth
#ApparentlySheLookedForUsForFiveMinutesWhenWeLeftButWhenWeArrivedWeWalkedInTheRoomAndSheDidNotEvenNotice
#IAmLikingThatTheMorningsAreLighterNowButINeedToGetUsedToGettingBOutOfTheHouseEarlierForAnAfternoonWalk

#IAmYetToDoTheShootButIImagineItWillBeSomeAbstractShotOfMyBumpAsWhenIExerciseILookAtItAndThinkThatIsWhatIWantToPhotograph

We shall see.

(Well, it ended up as an above shot of my bump. I like it.)

#IThinkBabyXMayBeMoreActiveThanBWasAsWhenIWasPregnantWithBIWasOftenJustSatByMyselfNotMakingMuchNoise

By this point I was at home all the time, not singing in case the neighbours heard me, and Tiago was in the small bedroom/his office working all day.

#NowAllDayIAmTalkingToBAndSingingToHerAndReadingHerBooksSoSheProbablyReactsToTheNoiseALot

Plus I have my Nan to talk to, and my Mum comes round a few times a week, and I take B for walks and talk to people at the playground and park.

#HoweverSheDoesKickOrPunchMeALotWhenIAmInBedAndItIsQuiteQuietSoMaybeSheIsMoreActive

I think the position of the placenta may have something to do with it too, but it’s probably a mix of all these things.

#IAmAlreadyStrugglingToPutMySocksOnButIRealisedAsBWasASummerBabyIJustWoreSandalsOutsideButAsBabyXIsAWinterBabyINeedToWearSocks

Trying to find the easiest way to put them on. Generally sitting down and doing a figure of 4 with my leg.

#IUsuallyWearTiagosShoesIfHeIsNotComingOutWithUsAsTheyAreEasierToJustSlipOnAndOff

The laces are done up and they slip on and off easily.

#WeSurvivedTheClockChangeThoughIDidWakeUpAndNoticeTheClockWasOffSoThoughtItHadFreakedOut

It’s a digital clock that sits on my desk, so I usually sit up and look at it when I wake up. Exciting stuff.

#ThenIRealisedTheElectricityHadGoneOffSoIWentToPlayWithTheFuseBoxAt2InTheMorningAsIWasWorriedAboutTheFreezerDefrosting

I had noticed other things weren’t showing their usual lights, and then the lamp next to the bed wouldn’t turn on. Tiago didn’t seem too bothered, but I wanted to sort it out. I was quite awake though.

#IUsedAWoodenSpatulaAsIWasWorriedAboutGettingAnElectricShockAndEverythingCameBackOn

Everything made a noise and I was surprised that no one woke up – especially the doorbell ringing.

#IWasLookingForwardToTheOvenFinallyHavingTheRightTimeOnItButThenISetItAs8InsteadOf6SoIHadToTurnItOffFor15MinutesAndTryAgain

I like to think I’m quite good at fixing things, but I hadn’t been able to work it out. Before it was nearly at the right time before the last clock change, then someone came and fixed the oven and set it to the right time. More exciting stuff.

#BWokeUpAt5ButSheIsAlreadyAdaptingThoughLastNightSheWasAwakeFor3HoursBetween12And3AsSheWasProbablyTeethingAndIsGoingThroughALeap

Luckily we’d both gone to bed early. I think Tiago was asleep at 9 and I was asleep around 9.45 possibly?

#InOtherNewsBHasBeenOfferedAPlaceForNursery

Hurrah.

#SheHasASettlingInHourSessionThisWeekThenAnHourAndAHalfOneNextWeekAndThenSheStarts

I am a little nervous, but I think she will love it.

#IFeelGuiltyAboutItAndIFeelLikeABitOfAFailureAsAStayAtHomeMum

Well, I guess in the beginning I won’t be a stay at home Mum when B is at nursery, but once Baby X is born I will be again.

#ButAtTheSameTimeIThinkItWillBeGoodForHerEspeciallyWhenBabyXComesAlongAndIWillBeTiredAndHaveLessEnthusiasm

She will love seeing the other kids and playing with different toys I’m sure. The food sounds nice too!

#ItIsOnlyForACoupleOfHalfDaysAWeekAndRealisticallyIWillProbablyPickHerUpEarly

It’s not much at all, but it’s enough for now.

#IThinkSheWillLikeItThereAndItWillGiveMeABitMoreTimeToOrganiseMyselfBeforeBabyXIsBornAndThenIKnowIHaveABitOfTimeEachWeekWhereIOnlyHaveToLookAfterOneKid

Baby X won’t be moving about for a long time and will be napping a lot. B naps once a day now and is always moving about. It will be different.

I need to really go through all my stuff and have a clear out, then go through baby clothes sorting them and washing them etc.

#UltimatelyIThinkItIsTheBestThingForUsAsAFamilyAndIFeelLikeItIsStartingAtTheRightTime

I feel less guilty now. I am definitely starting to feel more tired as bump gets bigger…

#MyParentsLookedAfterBForTheFirstTimeTheOtherDayAndItGaveMeATasteOfHowItMightBe

Though T and I have both felt a bit ill since. We’ve had negative Covid tests. I think our bodies just decided that it was safe to be ill.

#WeDroppedHerOffAfterBreakfastAndThenWeStayedABitToMakeSureSheWasAlright

My Dad recorded some episodes of Teletubbies for her and she seemed quite content.

#ThenWeWentHomeAndDidABitOfWorkThenWentOutForLunchWhereTheySaidThatTheyCouldNotServeTheDishOfTheDayYetAsTheyWereABitBehind

At first we thought they were closed as they had a sign up saying they were closed for a function, but that was the day before.

#IJustMadeACommentAboutHowWeWereTooKeenAsItWasOurFirstLunchDateWithoutOurDaughterAndSoHeSaidHeWouldMakeASmallBatch

Legend. It wasn’t that great in the end, but it felt good to get out and sit in a restaurant/cafe looking out the windows and not having to worry about B.

(We had lunch dates when we visited T’s parents I think, but it was always different as we always felt like we were on a timer.)

#TheDelayMeantWeHadSomeTimeToTalkAndItWasNiceToFeelLikeWeAreNotJustParentsInTheNicestWayPossible

I guess some couples have kids and then all they really talk about is the kids, so it was nice to think and talk about other things. We did talk about her a bit of course, but it was good to feel a bit like our old selves again too.

#OnTheWayHomeIFeltColdAndMyBumpWasTooBigToDoTheZipOfMyCoatUpSoWeHadToSwapCoatsAndIThinkTiagoMayBeBorrowingMyCoatForAWhileNow

He never realised how cozy my coat was. His coat was cold…

#AtHomeWeWatchedAlmostOneEpisodeOfAmericanCrimeStoryThenHadANapThenWentToPickHerUp

The day went fast.

#IThinkMyTimeWillLookVeryDifferentToThatWhileBIsAtNurseryButIGuessIMightRestALittleBitSometimesThoughIWillProbablyFeelGuiltyForDoingThat

I’m sure I’ll have my to do lists. If I get my stuff done then I can rest.

#ItIsGoodToKnowThatBCanHappilySpendTheDayWithMyParentsThoughAsSoonTheyWillBeHavingHerForAnOvernightStay

This was a test run.

#IGuessThisIsAllGoodPreparationAsTheyWillProbablyHaveToLookAfterHerWhileIAmInHospitalGivingBirth

With B I was in for 4 days, so we will have to see how it goes this time. It’s also good prep for B going to nursery, though she knows my Mum well.

#ApparentlySheLookedForUsForFiveMinutesWhenWeLeftButWhenWeArrivedWeWalkedInTheRoomAndSheDidNotEvenNotice

I was just going to sit on the sofa until she noticed but Tiago said hi.

#IAmLikingThatTheMorningsAreLighterNowButINeedToGetUsedToGettingBOutOfTheHouseEarlierForAnAfternoonWalk

Before we would dawdle for a bit before going for a walk. This morning I felt too tired to take B out for a walk, so we definitely need a good one later.

27 weeks pregnant with B comparison:

Self-portrait lying on a sofa leaning on my right elbow and my right hand is nestled in my hair. My top is lifted up so you can see my bump.
I Want To Keep Being Able To Go For Walks (27 weeks)
 
#IAmFeelingTired
#GladIDecidedYesterdayToTakePicturesOfMyselfOnTheSofaToday
#YesterdayIWasLyingOnThereWatchingMyBellyToSeeIfICouldSeeTheBabyMoving
#IHaveNotSeenTheBabyMoveAsMoveAsMuchAsTheFirstDayISawIt
#ITryToTakeABreakToSeeIfICanFeelAndSeeTheBabyMoving
#IThinkItIsMovingNow
#AndItWasDuringTheShootABit
#IDoNotThinkIWillReadBabyForumsForABit
#TheyStressedMeOutBefore
#ButNowWithCoronaTheyAreFullOfPeopleBeingMoreStressedOut
#StillTryingToGoOutForAWalkADay
#IMakeAnEffortToKeepAGoodDistanceBetweenMyselfAndOtherPeople
#TheOtherDayIWasOutsideOfASupermarket
#AWomanAndGuyCameAlong
#TheWomanWentInAndTheGuyStayedOutside
#ButHeStoodRightByTheDoor
#SoAnyoneGoingInAndOutHadToWalkLessThanAMetreAwayFromHim
#ThenYesterdayWeWereWalkingOnAVeryWidePathByTheKerb
#AGuyRanByPuffingAndPantingRightNextToUs
#IShouldHaveToldBothOfThemOff
#AndYesterdayISawTwoGuysCoughInTheStreetWithoutPuttingTheirHandsOverTheirMouths
#AndOneThenWalkedIntoTheSupermarketThatTiagoWasIn
#IWantToKeepBeingAbleToGoForWalks
#INeedTheExercise
#ButIfPeopleKeepNotKeepingTheirDistanceAndDoingDumbThingsThenIMightHaveToStop
#ThoughTheyAreTheOnesWhoShouldNotGoOut
#IFeelLikeMaybeWeWillNotGetIt
#ButMaybeIAmTryingToBeOptimistic
#ItSeemsMoreSeriousByTheDay
#IJustWantToKnowHowLongItWillGoOnForButItCouldBeALongTime

Well, I’m definitely feeling tired. I’m writing this on 2nd November. I’m going to have a nap once I finish the comparison bit.

I have not really read any forums this time as I do not have the time or energy for them.

People still annoy me, but less so now I am double vaccinated. I am worried now that cases are increasing again though.

People running right next to me while breathing loudly does still annoy me a lot.

#IJustWantToKnowHowLongItWillGoOnForButItCouldBeALongTime

Well, it’s still going on and I wrote that in March 2020.

Self-portrait with Tiago. He is facing the right of the frame and I am hugging him with my left hand, but facing more towards the camera.
I Feel Like I Have Lost A Sense Of Urgency (27 weeks)
 
#AnotherDayAtHome
#WellWeWentOutForAShortWalk
#YesterdayWeLeftOurWalkUntilTooLate
#WhenItWasStartingToGetDarkAndCold
#SoWeDidNotGoOut
#OriginallyWeWereHavingOurWalksAfterItGetsDark
#ButTheWeatherGotBetterSoWeWantedToEnjoyTheSunABit
#IHavePlentyOfThingsToKeepMeBusy
#ButIFeelLikeIHaveLostASenseOfUrgency
#LikeWhyRushAsIAmNotGoingAnywhereElse
#AFriendAskedUsIfWeWereOkayJustBeingAroundEachOtherAllDay
#YeahWeAreUsedToBeingHomeALot
#WeAreLuckyAsWeCanSitInDifferentRoomsWhilstWeAreWorkingIfWeWant
#ThoughThisWeekendWeHaveStuckToTheSameRoom
#IWasSupposedToStartPhotographingHimMoreAWhileAgo
#IDidForABitButIFeltBadBotheringHim
#HeWasOnThePhoneDoingTheWashingUpToday
#AndIWasHuggingHim
#AndIThoughtThatWouldMakeAnAlrightPicture
#SoLaterOnIAskedHimAndHeObviouslySaidYes
#ObviouslyAsInHeIsInThePicture
#AskedTiagoIfHeHadAnyCommentsAndHeSaid
#IFeelKindOfRelaxedToBeFair
#HopefulThatThingsWillGetBetterInAMonthOrTwo
#ISaidIThinkItMightTakeAWhileForThingsToGoBackToNormal
#ItMightBeAfterIGiveBirthAtThisPoint
#IThinkEvenWhenThisNonLockdownEndsIWillBeCautious
#AsItCouldQuiteEasilyComeBackAndStartAllOverAgain
#WhoKnows
#IThinkWeJustNeedToBeCareful

I was not much of a walker until Covid. Now with B I love to get out of the house, though this morning I felt too tired to and instead did some baking (we have a lot of bananas that need eating).

I remember this ‘loss of urgency’ phase quite well, but it did not really last too long. It was just a lot to try to comprehend.

We are still trying to be careful.

Me sitting on the floor in a bra and leggings with my legs together in butterfly pose and my hands on my knees. My bump is showing.
The Baby Moving Reminds Me Of A Whale Rolling (27 and a half weeks)
 
#AnotherHalfAWeekGone
#TimeFliesInItsOwnWay
#EvenWhenIAmAtHomeAllTheTime
#ApartForOurLittleDailyWalk
#WeNowWalkALessBusyWayIfWeDoNotNeedToGoToTheSupermarket
#WhichWeHaveNotBeenToItInAFewDaysButProbablyWillGoToTonight
#ExcitingTimes
#WellIWillJustStandOutsideJudgingTheBehaviourOfOthers
#IFeelLikeMyDaysAreStillPrettyFull
#IGuessIHadAGoodRoutineBeforeLockdownHappened
#SoThingsJustContinueAsNormalish
#IAmTryingToReadMore
#AndMaybeIWillStartToWatchMoreTVButIFeelLikeIDoNotHaveMuchTimeForIt
#MaybeJustAtTheWeekends
#IAmQuiteFarBehindWithPostingTheProjectForOthersToSee
#ItIsFunnyReadingMyPreviousConcerns
#ThingsLikePeopleTouchingMyBelly
#LuckilyIWillNotHaveToWorryAboutThatWithSocialDistancing
#WhenWeGoOutForAWalkIWorryThatPeopleLookAtMeLikeSheShouldNotBeOutHere
#ButThatIsWhyItIsNiceThatWeGoTheQuietRoute
#AndPeopleSeemToBeGettingBetterAtKeepingADistance
#IStillGetWorriedAboutNotFeelingTheBabyMove
#IThinkIJustGetSoDistractedByThingsThatIDoNotRegisterItMoving
#IThinkItIsMovingNowThough
#WhenItTurnsOverItRemindsMeOfWhenYouSeeAWhaleRolling
#NotThatIAmComparingTheBabyToAWhale
#ButIJustVisualiseThatRollingMotion
#IGuessItIsARelaxingComparison
#IDoNotFeelTooWorriedAsIBarelyLeaveTheFlat
#ICallMyNanEverydayAndIHopeThatSheStaysFine

It’s so weird that Covid is still going on, but it’s better now that there are vaccines.

My walks are more with purpose these days as I am usually taking B somewhere, and we live in Birmingham now instead of Liverpool.

I think I will not stop being anxious about the baby during the pregnancy, and then when they’re born there are new anxieties.


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Categories
Pregnancy Waiting II

General Documenting Pregnancy Shoot IV (24 Weeks / 17th October 2021)

Shoot which I am recreating for the 4th time this pregnancy. I am wearing a bra and leggings. I have my right hand clasping my left elbow. My bump is bigger than the previous version of this image.
General Documenting Pregnancy Shoot IV (24 Weeks / 17th October 2021)

#IThoughtItWasTimeThatIDoOneOfTheseShootsAgain
#TheBraThatIWearForThemHasFallenApartALotSinceTheFirstShootSoItWillBeGoingInTheBinOnceBabyXIsBorn
#MyBumpIsDefinitelyGettingBiggerAndICanNotImagineItGettingMuchBiggerButIKnowItWill
#IAmStrugglingToBendDownToPickThingsUpNowWhichIsReallyHandyAsBLikesToThrowEverythingOnTheFloor
#YesterdayISuddenlyFeltTheUrgeToTidyUpOurRoomAndGetRidOfLotsOfThings
#IDoNeedToDeclutterAndReduceMyStuffAsWeArePlanningToMoveAtSomePointNextYear
#SoItIsBetterToDoItNowWhileICanMoveAboutIshAndBeforeBabyXIsBorn
#ThereIsSoMuchStuffThatHasSurvived5MovesWithMeButINeedToBeRealisticWhetherIWouldWantToPayToShipItInTheFutureAndTheAnswerIsUsuallyNo
#IThinkTheOrganisingPlusDoingSomeExtraDanceVideosReallyTiredMeOut
#ThisMorningBWasUpAtFiveThirtySoTiagoWentToGetHerAndUsuallyIWakeUpButIWasAsleepWithHerPlayingRightNextToMe
#SheHasBeenAwakeAtFiveThirtyTheLastFewMorningsWhichIsNotMuchFunThoughAtLeastSheHasALongFirstNap
#IThinkItIsDueToHerTeethingAsSheSeemsToAlwaysHaveHerFingersInHerMouth
#SheOnlyReallyHasMolarsLeftToComeThroughAndTheyCanNotBePleasantAtAll
#ILikeHowIUsedToCountHowManyTeethSheHasAndNowIHaveNoIdea
#WeHaveFinallyBookedToGoAndLookAtANurseryForHer
#TheDaysWeAreThinkingWillMeanWeWillNeedToCancelHerMusicClassAndIWasFeelingBadAboutItAsILikeHerTeacherALot
#ButItTurnsOutHerTeacherIsFiveWeeksLessPregnantThanMeSoSheWillBeGoingOnMaternityLeaveAndNowIDoNotFeelSoBad
#IAmFeelingQuiteStressedAboutBeingPregnantAndTheFactWeWillSoonHaveTwoKids
#WeJustSeemSoTiredAtTheMomentAndEvenThoughBWakesUpEarlyAtLeastWeDoGetAGoodAmountOfSleep
#IJustNeedToGoToBedEarlierWhichToBeFairIDidLastNightButItObviouslyWasNotEnough
#EveryoneKeepsSayingTheFirstYearIsTheHardestAndToBeHonestIAmNotLookingForwardToWeaningAndAllThatStuffAgain
#HopefullySheWillArriveAndIWillJustGetOnWithItAndAllICanDoIsToTryMyBest
#AtLeastInTheEarlyDaysTheirNeedsArePrettyBasic
#IJustNeedToMakeAnEffortToGetOutOfTheHouseOnceADayForMySanity
#ItWillBeAStruggleInTheBeginningIAmSureButWeJustNeedToFindARoutineThatWorksForUs
#IJustHopeThatWeDoNotGetLockedDownAgainButThenAgainWhatDoesItMatterWhenIDoubtIWillWantToGoFarAnyways
#IAmWorriedThatCasesAreRisingButEveryoneIsABitNonchalantAboutItButIGuessIAmMoreRelaxedNowIHaveHadMySecondVaccineAndFluJab
#IJustDoNotGetWhyWearingMasksInShopsAndStuffIsNotCompulsoryAndIAmSurprisedAtHowFewPeopleActuallyDoWearThem
#InOtherNewsBIsTryingReallyHardToTalkNowAndISwearSheSaysTickleTickleTickle
#IHaveHeardACoupleOfMamaAndMumSoundsEscapeFromHerLatelyTooSoIHopeSheMightActuallyStartSayingMumAtMeSoon

#IThoughtItWasTimeThatIDoOneOfTheseShootsAgain

The last one was at 19 weeks, so there should be a difference?

(Yes, there is – you can see the versions here: 1 / 2 / 3.)

#TheBraThatIWearForThemHasFallenApartALotSinceTheFirstShootSoItWillBeGoingInTheBinOnceBabyXIsBorn

Maybe in each picture it will start to look more shabby. I’ve been wearing my maternity bras for a while now, and this is not one of them.

#MyBumpIsDefinitelyGettingBiggerAndICanNotImagineItGettingMuchBiggerButIKnowItWill

*Nervous laugh*

#IAmStrugglingToBendDownToPickThingsUpNowWhichIsReallyHandyAsBLikesToThrowEverythingOnTheFloor

This morning she was eating some of my breakfast (scrambled eggs and crusts of my toast), and then throwing it on the floor. I did struggle to pick it up.

#YesterdayISuddenlyFeltTheUrgeToTidyUpOurRoomAndGetRidOfLotsOfThings

I love nesting.

#IDoNeedToDeclutterAndReduceMyStuffAsWeArePlanningToMoveAtSomePointNextYear

Every time I go through my things I get rid of a few more things, but I need to start being ruthless.

#SoItIsBetterToDoItNowWhileICanMoveAboutIshAndBeforeBabyXIsBorn

I am tired, so yeah there will never be a good time again.

#ThereIsSoMuchStuffThatHasSurvived5MovesWithMeButINeedToBeRealisticWhetherIWouldWantToPayToShipItInTheFutureAndTheAnswerIsUsuallyNo

Playing my favourite ‘would I pay £5 to ship this?’ game.

I told Tiago about it and he said would most things really cost £5 to ship. I said no, but would you still pay £5 to ship it? Is it worth the money?

#IThinkTheOrganisingPlusDoingSomeExtraDanceVideosReallyTiredMeOut

I did lie down before B’s second nap, but I’m not sure if I even slept.

#ThisMorningBWasUpAtFiveThirtySoTiagoWentToGetHerAndUsuallyIWakeUpButIWasAsleepWithHerPlayingRightNextToMe

Wake up as in become more alert. I ended up sleeping in until 7.10am, and then I looked through my books and stretched. Then Tiago had a nap (and is still napping as B is napping as I write this).

#SheHasBeenAwakeAtFiveThirtyTheLastFewMorningsWhichIsNotMuchFunThoughAtLeastSheHasALongFirstNap

I try not to put her down for a nap until 9, and then wake her up between 10.30 to 11 depending on our plans.

#IThinkItIsDueToHerTeethingAsSheSeemsToAlwaysHaveHerFingersInHerMouth

I’m being more generous with her paracetamol these days, as otherwise she does not nap or sleep very well. I do worry that I am drugging her at times, but it’s only when I see her with her fingers in her mouth and it’s been 4 hours since the last dose…

#SheOnlyReallyHasMolarsLeftToComeThroughAndTheyCanNotBePleasantAtAll

Bless her.

#ILikeHowIUsedToCountHowManyTeethSheHasAndNowIHaveNoIdea

If I put my finger in her mouth now it just gets bitten and it hurts.

#WeHaveFinallyBookedToGoAndLookAtANurseryForHer

Hurrah.

#TheDaysWeAreThinkingWillMeanWeWillNeedToCancelHerMusicClassAndIWasFeelingBadAboutItAsILikeHerTeacherALot

The class isn’t the best but I do really like her teacher and she makes it way more enjoyable.

#ButItTurnsOutHerTeacherIsFiveWeeksLessPregnantThanMeSoSheWillBeGoingOnMaternityLeaveAndNowIDoNotFeelSoBad

I mentioned I was pregnant last week and she said ‘oh me too’. I really could not tell that she was at all, but she does wear a baggy t-shirt. I had looked at moving locations and days, but I think once B goes down to one nap the other day and time will not work for us. Hopefully B will get enough stimulation at nursery and we can just do more music stuff at home.

#IAmFeelingQuiteStressedAboutBeingPregnantAndTheFactWeWillSoonHaveTwoKids

I feel like I’ve mentioned it before, but I am starting to get waves of overwhelmed-ness now.

#WeJustSeemSoTiredAtTheMomentAndEvenThoughBWakesUpEarlyAtLeastWeDoGetAGoodAmountOfSleep #IJustNeedToGoToBedEarlierWhichToBeFairIDidLastNightButItObviouslyWasNotEnough

This would probably make a big difference, and I’m sure once she is born I will have to just surrender to motherhood, but for now I am enjoying have a bit of evening time to myself.

#EveryoneKeepsSayingTheFirstYearIsTheHardestAndToBeHonestIAmNotLookingForwardToWeaningAndAllThatStuffAgain

I just need to take each day/cycle of the day at a time.

#HopefullySheWillArriveAndIWillJustGetOnWithItAndAllICanDoIsToTryMyBest

We wanted this baby and I have to handle the responsibility. I am nervous though.

#AtLeastInTheEarlyDaysTheirNeedsArePrettyBasic

And she won’t be running off like B does.

#IJustNeedToMakeAnEffortToGetOutOfTheHouseOnceADayForMySanity

It will be winter, but hopefully by then spring will not be too far away.

#ItWillBeAStruggleInTheBeginningIAmSureButWeJustNeedToFindARoutineThatWorksForUs

Like I said, I need to surrender to motherhood.

#IJustHopeThatWeDoNotGetLockedDownAgainButThenAgainWhatDoesItMatterWhenIDoubtIWillWantToGoFarAnyways

B’s classes moving to zoom would make things a lot easier to be fair. I doubt we will have another lockdown though.

#IAmWorriedThatCasesAreRisingButEveryoneIsABitNonchalantAboutItButIGuessIAmMoreRelaxedNowIHaveHadMySecondVaccineAndFluJab

Other countries have less cases and are in full panic mode, but I guess they are not as vaccinated as here.

#IJustDoNotGetWhyWearingMasksInShopsAndStuffIsNotCompulsoryAndIAmSurprisedAtHowFewPeopleActuallyDoWearThem

We still wear them in shops, and I do on public transport though that is rare. I have not been wearing them in classes, but in B’s music class she does not go near anyone else and we sit far back from everyone. At another class I probably should, but no one else does… When it’s time to sing we sat at the back of the bunch.

#InOtherNewsBIsTryingReallyHardToTalkNowAndISwearSheSaysTickleTickleTickle

It sounds more like ‘iggle iggle iggle’ or something else I guess, but I think that is what she is trying to say.

#IHaveHeardACoupleOfMamaAndMumSoundsEscapeFromHerLatelyTooSoIHopeSheMightActuallyStartSayingMumAtMeSoon

She’s been saying Dada and Dad for so long, though she doesn’t really say it at Tiago much. She is growing up fast though.

Despite my nervousness I am excited to see her with her sister.

24 weeks pregnant with B comparison:

Self-portrait wearing a black dress with white stripes. I have a toy octopus on my head.
So Many Decisions To Be Made (24 and a half weeks)
 
#SoWeFinallyBoughtSomeBabyStuff
#ThereWereSomeGoodSalesOn
#SoWeOrderedSomeBabyClothes
#AndThenISawSomeCuteToysSoIBoughtACouple
#ItFeelsLikeWeAreCursingThingsByBuyingStuff
#ButIAlsoDoNotWantToGetCaughtOutByHavingNothing
#ObviouslyTheBabyWillNotKnowIfItHasToysOrNotInTheBeginning
#ButThingsLikeClothesAreNecessary
#SoManyDecisionsToBeMade
#ThingsAreSeemingMoreReal
#ThoughIAlsoDoStillForgetThatIAmPregnantSometimes
#IFeltSoHeavyNotLongAgoButIFeelLighterTheseDays
#MaybeItIsAllTheStretchingIAmDoing
#AndOrMaybeIAmNotEatingSuchBigMealsNow
#IDoASquatPoseInTheMorning
#ButInTheEveningItIsHarderAsMyBellyIsFuller
#IBoughtAHypnobirthingCourseAfterAFriendsRecommendation
#INeedToStartDoingThatJustInCaseAsAgainIDoNotWantToGetCaughtOut
#IKeepReadingThingsAboutPeopleWhoDidNotWantToBeParents
#WhereasIDoButIWorryThatIWillBeRubbish
#ThoughIRememberGoingToSeeMyNieceForTheFirstTimeAndBeingWorriedAsIHadNotBeenAroundABabyForALongTime
#ButISoonGotOverTheNervousness
#ThoughIWasJustEntertainingHerAndNotDoingHerWholeRoutineAndBeingAroundHerAllDayEveryDay
#ICanOnlyDoMyBest
#AndSoonWeWillDoAnNCTCourseSoHopefullyWeWillNotBeTooClueless
#IFeelLikeTiagoIsGoodWithKids
#IAmLookingForwardToSeeingHimAsAFather
#IGotAKickTrackingAppYesterdayToTryToMakeMeFeelBetter
#ThoughIAmNotMonitoringHowManyKicksYetButJustWhenIFeelItMoving
#TodayIHaveNotFeltItMoveMuchButIThinkIHaveNotBeenThinkingAboutItAsMuchAsYesterday

This shoot was a bit bad. It was definitely a day when I was struggling with ideas…

It’s funny now as it’s gone from being a toy that we bought to it being B’s toy that she does interact with from time to time.

#ObviouslyTheBabyWillNotKnowIfItHasToysOrNotInTheBeginning

B has only really started to interact with the toys she had then, quite recently. Especially cuddly toys.

We aren’t going to do the hypnobirthing course again, but I have the book of it which we are both planning to read again. I need to get on with it really as time is flying by…

I downloaded an app to monitor kicks but I have only used it once. This baby seems more active, so I feel reassured. I am being kicked/punched right now…


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Categories
Pregnancy Waiting II

Portrait Of A Mother Of A Fifteen Month Old (20 Weeks / 16th September 2021)

Self-portrait in B's tent. I'm leaning on my elbows in the doorway with my fingers pushing in my cheeks.
Portrait Of A Mother Of A Fifteen Month Old (20 Weeks / 16th September 2021)
 
#AfterALotOfLaptopStressInTheLastWeekWithItChargingThenNotItIsNoMore
#SoIAmWritingThisFromTiagosWhereTheSKeyDoesNotWorkAndIHavePasteItInEveryTimeIWantIt
#ICanNotBelieveThatIAm20WeeksAlready
#LastNightIHadATerribleLegCrampForTheFirstTimeInAgesAndIThinkItWasDueToBeingDehydrated
#IWasSoTiredTheOtherDayThatILayDownForANapDuringHerSecondNapWhichIUsuallyDoButThenOversleptBy40Minutes
#LuckilyIPutBToBedJust10MinutesLaterThanUsualAndSheWokeUpAt7InTheMorning
#IAmTryingToMakeMyLifeEasierByLettingBCrawlInAndOutOfHerCotViaTheZippedEntrance
#SheHasDefinitelyChangedALotInTheLastWeekOrTwo
#SheHasStartedToSlideOutOfHerPushchairWhenIPutHerInItSoINowHaveToReclineItToBabyModeWhenItIsTimeToGo
#SheDoesNotComplainOnceSheIsBuckledInAtLeast
#BLovesHerNewShoesAndWandersAroundThePlaygroundInThemNow
#SheSeemsToWalkInThemWellAndHerNewFavouriteThingToDoIsJustShakeTheChainAtTheBottomOfAClimbingWall
#TheOtherDaySheKeptOpeningALittleDrawerInTheLivingRoomThatCouldFallOutAndHurtHer
#TAndIKeptSayingNoAndWhenISayNoSheLooksAtMeLikeIAmTheMeanestPersonOnThePlanet
#InTheEndWeTurnedItRoundAndWhenSheNoticedSheWasPuzzledFor5SecondsAndThenMovedOntoSomethingElse
#SheHasAPatchOfDrySkinOnTheBackOfHerNeckWhichWasWorryingMeButThenIRealisedItIsBecauseSheLikesToPutEverythingAroundHerNeck
#ItIsNotTheBestHabitForHerToHaveSoWeHaveToBeReallyCareful
#SheLikesToHoldThingsSoTheyTouchTheBackOfHerNeckRatherThanGoAllTheWayRoundAtLeast
#SheHasStartedToHelpHerselfToFruitFromTheFruitBowlAndYesterdayManagedToEatMostOfAnAppleThroughoutTheDay
#YouCanSeeThatSheHasAMouthfulOfTeethNowButTheAppleWasQuiteSoftWhichExplainsWhySheWasNotStruggling
#ThisLackOfSKeyIsReallyAnnoying
#BHasAlwaysLovedMusicButItShowsMoreLatelyWhenASongEndsAndSheMakesANoiseAsIfToSayWhyHasTheMusicStopped
#IAmWorriedAboutCovidAndThingsGettingBadAgain
#IFeelABitDividedAboutBoosterShotsAsItSeemsABitUnfairOnALotOfCountriesButIWillAlsoFeelMoreRelievedWhenNanGetsHers
#WeWentToBsToddlerClassAgainAndAtTheFirstOneIDidNotWearAMaskButIDidAtThisOne
#IKnowOnlyMeWearingAMaskDoesNotDoMuchGoodButIFeelSlightlyMoreProtected
#IDoNotWantBsClassesToGetCancelledAgainIfCasesIncreaseButPerhapsItWillBeEasierToAttendOnlineIfItIsAfterBabyXIsBorn
#SheKeptHerDistanceFromTheOtherKidsAndWasQuiteHappyStandingByHerselfWithAMaraca
#ItMustBeOverwhelmingForHerSuddenlyBeingAroundOlderKidsSoAsLongAsSheEnjoysHerselfIDoNotMind
#SheLovesToWatchTheOlderKidsInThePlaygroundSoMaybeSheJustNeedsABitMoreTimeBeforeSheJoinsIn

#AfteraLotOfLaptopStressInTheLastWeekWithItChargingThenNotItIsNoMore

It was struggling to charge, so I got a new charger and then that confirmed that it was my laptop that had the problem… A replacement will hopefully arrive in the next few days.

#SoIAmWritingThisFromTiagosWhereTheSKeyDoesNotWorkAndIHavePasteItInEveryTimeIWantIt

It makes for slow and frustrating work. Maybe it will be a shorter entry than normal.

#ICanNotBelieveThatIAm20WeeksAlready

I have my 20 week scan coming up. I am excited but nervous.

#LastNightIHadATerribleLegCrampForTheFirstTimeInAgesAndIThinkItWasDueToBeingDehydrated

I did feel really thirsty. It is so painful.

#IWasSoTiredTheOtherDayThatILayDownForANapDuringHerSecondNapWhichIUsuallyDoButThenOversleptBy40Minutes

I think my alarm had gone off but I was so disorientated that I went back to sleep and then woke up 40 minutes later and went ‘whoops’. The alarm clock in our room has weirdly disappeared while we were on holiday, but every one says they have not touched it. Weird.

#LuckilyIPutBToBedJust10MinutesLaterThanUsualAndSheWokeUpAt7InTheMorning

Phew. I did not want to put her to bed much later, and I was worried that she would wake up at 6 or something.

She has been making noises at 5 or 6 some days but she tends to go back to sleep until 6:45 or 7. Phew.

#IAmTryingToMakeMyLifeEasierByLettingBCrawlInAndOutOfHerCotViaTheZippedEntrance

I do not want to have to lift her up more times than necessary.

#SheHasDefinitelyChangedALotInTheLastWeekOrTwo

She seems more grown up or acts older at times.

#SheHasStartedToSlideOutOfHerPushchairWhenIPutHerInItSoINowHaveToReclineItToBabyModeWhenItIsTimeToGo

A bit of a tantrum. This seems to be the easiest way to deal with it, where we both do not get too stressed or annoyed.

#SheDoesNotComplainOnceSheIsBuckledInAtLeast

I think kids get distracted quite quickly.

#BLovesHerNewShoesAndWandersAroundThePlaygroundInThemNow #SheSeemsToWalkInThemWellAndHerNewFavouriteThingToDoIsJustShakeTheChainAtTheBottomOfAClimbingWall

Considering she had not worn shoes for three or more weeks she walk really well in them. she likes to play with the velcro too…

She likes to rattle the chain as it makes a loud noise. it is fine as long as long as no older kids are waiting to climb.

#TheOtherDaySheKeptOpeningALittleDrawerInTheLivingRoomThatCouldFallOutAndHurtHer #TAndIKeptSayingNoAndWhenISayNoSheLooksAtMeLikeIAmTheMeanestPersonOnThePlanet

The way her lip curls (I think that’s the right term?) and she looks at me. I only say no if she is doing something dangerous, so I do not feel too bad about it. She does not give T the same look though…

#InTheEndWeTurnedItRoundAndWhenSheNoticedSheWasPuzzledFor5SecondsAndThenMovedOntoSomethingElse

There is always something else for her to be meddling with…

#SheHasAPatchOfDrySkinOnTheBackOfHerNeckWhichWasWorryingMeButThenIRealisedItIsBecauseSheLikesToPutEverythingAroundHerNeck

Which likely explains it, so I have been putting cream on it whenever I remember.

#ItIsNotTheBestHabitForHerToHaveSoWeHaveToBeReallyCareful

We can not seem to stop her doing it.

#SheLikesToHoldThingsSoTheyTouchTheBackOfHerNeckRatherThanGoAllTheWayRoundAtLeast

I am worried that she might suffocate herself. I can see how it is easily done…

#SheHasStartedToHelpHerselfToFruitFromTheFruitBowlAndYesterdayManagedToEatMostOfAnAppleThroughoutTheDay

She took a bit out of it though and then was keen to bite all the other ones.

#YouCanSeeThatSheHasAMouthfulOfTeethNowButTheAppleWasQuiteSoftWhichExplainsWhySheWasNotStruggling

I was impressed but also worried that she was going to break all her teeth.

#ThisLackOfSKeyIsReallyAnnoying

–make s hashtag capital —

I am going to have to make all the capital s’ bigger when I post this. It is too much effort. (Going through this in mid-October I have had to capitalise so many s’.)

#BHasAlwaysLovedMusicButItShowsMoreLatelyWhenASongEndsAndSheMakesANoiseAsIfToSayWhyHasTheMusicStopped

We listen to a good mix of classic, and then Vicky Arlidge – her favourite nursery rhyme singer.

#IAmWorriedAboutCovidAndThingsGettingBadAgain

Oh, the C word appears again.

#IFeelABitDividedAboutBoosterShotsAsItSeemsaBitUnfairOnALotOfCountriesButIWillAlsoFeelMoreRelievedWhenNanGetsHers

It does seem unfair to be getting them already, but people like my Nan are starting to get more vulnerable again.

#WeWentToBsToddlerClassAgainAndAtTheFirstOneIDidNotWearaMaskButIDidAtThisOne

I decided to not wear one when I saw no one else was, but then I spent the whole class feeling uncomfortable. With this one, someone else walked in wearing one, but then took it off. I felt awkard being the only person wearing one – in case people thought I was ill or something. Oh well.

#IKnowOnlyMeWearingAMaskDoesNotDoMuchGoodButIFeelSlightlyMoreProtected

I am basically protecting everyone from me, but I’m not that protected from them. Fun time.

#IDoNotWantBsClassesToGetCancelledAgainIfCasesIncreaseButPerhapsItWillBeEasierToAttendOnlineIfItIsAfterBabyXIsBorn

It is what it is, and we will just have to deal with it. I am not looking forward to the winter.

#SheKeptHerDistanceFromTheOtherKidsAndWasQuiteHappyStandingByHerselfWithAMaraca

The other kids are mostly older and have lots of energy and can talk, and respond more.

#ItMustBeOverwhelmingForHerSuddenlyBeingAroundOlderKidsSoAsLongAsSheEnjoysHerselfIDoNotMind

It is her class, so she can do what she wants. she is not hurting anyone, so it is fine.

#SheLovesToWatchTheOlderKidsInThePlaygroundSoMaybeSheJustNeedsABitMoreTimeBeforeSheJoinsIn

She is just doing a lot of observing, so one day she might just start to do more things, and get more involved. We just need to wait and see.

20 weeks pregnant with B comparison:

Close-up of my belly button.
My Belly Button Has Never Been So Close (20 and a half weeks)
 
#IGuessItMustBeWeirderForPeopleWhoHaveInnies
#ItHasBeenMoreOutForAFewWeeks
#ButIAmStartingToThinkThatMaybeItHasAlwaysBeenLikeThis
#ButBecauseMyBellyIsGrowingThenItIsCloserToMe
#IFeelLikeItWasHarderToCleanBeforeThough
#InOtherNewsIHadMy20WeekScanToday
#WasRelievedToSeeAHeartbeatVeryQuickly
#ThoughTheScannerWasQuietALotWhichWorriedMe
#IGuessSheWasJustConcentratingOnCheckingThings
#AtOnePointWeCouldSeeItMovingItsMouthWhichWasFunny
#SheDidAllTheChecksApartFromThree
#SheAskedMeToGoToTheLooAndThenJumpUpAndDown
#TheBabyWasInABallAndWouldNotBudge
#SheHadMeRockingMyHipsFromSideToSide
#ItWouldNotMove
#SheMadeMeDrinkASugaryDrinkAndGoForAWalk
#ItWouldNotMove
#SheHadMeDoingStarjumps
#IWasImpressedWithHowManyIDidBut
#ItWouldNotMove
#SoIHaveToGoBackIn2To3Weeks
#IHopeEverythingIsOkay
#IStillHaveNotHadMyScreeningResultsFrom7PlusWeeksAgo
#IJustKeptLaughingAtTheMonitor
#WeHaveAPictureOfItLookingLikeAGrumpyOldMan
#WhenSheShowedUsItsFaceBeforeItLookedMoreLikeAPuppyThanABaby
#ThenSheShowedUsItsSpineSoMuchThatIComparedItToADinosaur
#SheGaveUsThePicturesForFreeAsSheSaidTheBabyWasInSuchABadPosition
#ICanDefinitelyFeelTheBabyMovingAroundNow
#ItTypicallyWasMovingBeforeAndAfterTheAppointment

It seemed quite pushed out from an early stage this time, but I didn’t document it as it was not so interesting to me this time.

My next post will talk about my 20 week scan for baby X. It was definitely a lot easier this time round, though I was sent out to go to the toilet (weirdly I wrote holiday) to see if it would help do the last few checks.


Thanks for reading! If you’re enjoying my blog (and/or the work I make) please consider supporting me by ‘buying me a coffee’ on Ko-fi – thanks!

Categories
Pregnancy Waiting II

Imitating B In Her Temporary Cot (17 Weeks / 25th August 2021)

Self-portrait of my face pressed up against two bars of B's temporary cot.
Imitating B In Her Temporary Cot (17 Weeks / 25th August 2021)
 
#SheDoesSomethingSimilarInHerCotAtHomeButTheEffectIsQuiteDifferentAsThisIsBarsAndAtHomeItIsMesh
#EveryoneKeepsSayingHowMuchBLooksLikeTiagoButSheDefinitelyHasMyLoveOfWater
#SheHasBeenGettingUpsetWheneverWeTakeHerOutOfHerPoolOrOutOfTheSea
#HerLittleLipsWillBeShiveringAndSheWillWantToKeepGoingBackIn
#YesterdayWeTookHerToASpotThatHadARedAndYellowFlag
#WeTookItInTurnsSwimmingInTheYellowAreaAndOnlyLetBHaveALittleSplashWhenTheSeaCalmedDownMomentarily
#WeAreAdjustingToBeingHereButIFeelQuiteLostWithoutOurUsualRoutineAndStuff
#ThisHouseIsNotVeryBabyProofAndThisMorningIHadToRunDownTheCorridorInCaseBDecidedToGoToTheSteps
#TheOtherDayOurAlarmWentOffForTheFirstTimeInMonthsAndWeActuallyHadToWakeBUpForOnceAfterSeven
#ItSeemsLikeAOneOffThoughAsSheHasAtLeastThreeTeethComingThroughAndUsuallyWakesUpAt6SomethingNowWhichIsOkay
#MaybeItIsDueToHavingALaterDinnerOrMaybeItIsFromAllTheSplashingOrMaybeItIsAMixOfFactors
#IThinkWeWillTryPushingHerDinnerALittleLaterWhenWeGetHomeThoughAndGivingHerBiggerSnacks
#TheOtherDayIGotStungByALittleJellyfishWhichWasABitOfAShockButALifeguardPutSomeGelOnIt
#IManagedToSwallowSomeSeaWaterOnAnotherOccasionAndIEndedUpVomitingInMyHandAwkwardlyInFrontOfAFewPeople
#OurConnectingFlightOnTheWayBackHasBeenDelayedByFiveHours
#ThisMeansWeHaveANineHourLayoverAndWillProbablyGetHomeAtThreeInTheMorning
#TheAirlinesDoNotCareWhichIsDisappointingSoWeWillHaveToSeeWhatWeCanDoOtherwiseWeWillHaveToJustDealWithIt
#WeGotATimeAndDateForOur20WeekScanWhichIsAlsoInconvenientSoICalledAndSaidWhatDaysAreBestForUsAndTheyGivenUsAnotherInconvenientSlot
#SoTiagoWillProbablyHaveToWaitWithBInTheCarAndIWillHaveToGoInAloneWhichIsAnnoyingButWhatCanWeDo
#WeHaveTakenBToAMassiveDuckPondACoupleOfTimesWhichSheQuiteLikesAndILoveLookingAtAllTheDucklings
#ThereAreNoDucksLikeTheOnesAtHomeSoItIsNiceToSeeSomeDifferentBirds
#IHadNeverBeenThereBeforeButIGuessThatOurPrioritiesHaveChangedNowWithBAndWeWantToGoToMoreKidFriendlyPlaces
#WeHaveBeenGoingToALittleCoffeeShopForBreakfastAndYesterdayBManagedToKnockTiagosCoffeeAllOverMyBreakfastAndMe
#WhenWeWerePackingISaidIDidNotWantToBringManyClothesAsIEndUpWearingTheSameThreeOutfits
#InRealityIHaveBeenWearingTheSameDressAndJustWashingItAndPuttingItOnAgainAsSoonAsPossible
#WeHaveBeenRunningErrandsOrGoingToMeetFriendsWhileBSleepsAndTiagosMumKeepsAnEyeOnHer
#TheOtherNightWeWentToABarbequeAfterBHadGoneToBedButThenISpentTheWholeEveningSatByABabyAndAFourYearOldSoFeltBadForNotBringingHer
#MyPortugueseSpeakingHasImprovedButIStillFindItDifficultToUnderstandWhatPeopleAreSaying
#IGetSoTiredSoQuicklyInTheEveningsWhenWeGoOutWhichIsProbablyDueToUsingExtraBrainPowerTryingAndGenerallyFailingToTranslate
#ItIsNiceToSeePeopleButIHaveNotSocialisedThisMuchInAVeryLongTime

#SheDoesSomethingSimilarInHerCotAtHomeButTheEffectIsQuiteDifferentAsThisIsBarsAndAtHomeItIsMesh

It’s less of a full face smush, and more of a partial face smush?

#EveryoneKeepsSayingHowMuchBLooksLikeTiagoButSheDefinitelyHasMyLoveOfWater

Yes, she does look like him a lot. There’s a picture above her cot of Tiago as a baby and I keep pointing to it and saying ‘there’s daddy as a baby’ and she laughs.

Tiago likes the water, but he usually just likes to have a very short swim whereas I want to swim for ages. Well, I can’t anymore…

#SheHasBeenGettingUpsetWheneverWeTakeHerOutOfHerPoolOrOutOfTheSea

Similar vibes to when Tiago puts her back on the floor, when she wants to be in his arms all day.

#HerLittleLipsWillBeShiveringAndSheWillWantToKeepGoingBackIn

We try to not let her go in for more than fifteen minutes at a time.

#YesterdayWeTookHerToASpotThatHadARedAndYellowFlag

We saw the flags and were pretty gutted. Tiago went to talk to the lifeguards to see if it was safe enough to swim/take B in. There was a set of stairs that was safe to use, but we had to be careful as waves would wash over the wall and made it a bit dangerous.

#WeTookItInTurnsSwimmingInTheYellowAreaAndOnlyLetBHaveALittleSplashWhenTheSeaCalmedDownMomentarily

B was quite happy splashing in a little puddle on the rocks by the sea, but then after she’d had a bit of a splash in the sea she was annoyed again. She was getting quite jealous of me swimming in the sea. Better to be safe than sorry…

#WeAreAdjustingToBeingHereButIFeelQuiteLostWithoutOurUsualRoutineAndStuff

Today Tiago is out all day running errands, and I’m not sure how to entertain her all day. It’s times like these that I wish I could drive… Public transport around here is not easy to use/it takes forever.

#ThisHouseIsNotVeryBabyProofAndThisMorningIHadToRunDownTheCorridorInCaseBDecidedToGoToTheSteps

I was just turning the light off in the kitchen and I thought B was outside the door. I went to see and she was at the other end of the corridor by steps that go down, so I RAN.

#TheOtherDayOurAlarmWentOffForTheFirstTimeInMonthsAndWeActuallyHadToWakeBUpForOnceAfterSeven

I usually set the alarm to ignore as soon as B gets up. It is better when she wakes us up as we couldn’t be bothered to get up if she wasn’t going to. We got her up at 7:15 in the end.

#ItSeemsLikeAOneOffThoughAsSheHasAtLeastThreeTeethComingThroughAndUsuallyWakesUpAt6SomethingNowWhichIsOkay

She must have not been teething that morning. A few nights ago she was waking up from 4. Yesterday it was 6:30. Today she woke up at 6.

#MaybeItIsDueToHavingALaterDinnerOrMaybeItIsFromAllTheSplashingOrMaybeItIsAMixOfFactors

We will never know.

#IThinkWeWillTryPushingHerDinnerALittleLaterWhenWeGetHomeThoughAndGivingHerBiggerSnacks

People just eat later here. Yesterday I had a small dinner when B had hers (at 6ish) and then I had a second dinner at a friend’s house.

She can have a good snack when she wakes up from her second nap if she’s having a later dinner. We haven’t given her any yoghurt since we’ve been here (which we usually give her as a snack before bedtime in hope that she will sleep later).

#TheOtherDayIGotStungByALittleJellyfishWhichWasABitOfAShockButALifeguardPutSomeGelOnIt

Usually I keep a look out for them, but I was just swimming by myself and felt an electric shock in my arm. I told a friend (in bad Portuguese) and she said maybe it was muscle pain, but I didn’t think so.

Tiago was with a friend who was talking to a lifeguard, so he put some gel on it, and then a bit later the area where I got stung raised up a bit. It wouldn’t hurt and then suddenly it would. Weird. I had looked in the water but saw nothing.

#IManagedToSwallowSomeSeaWaterOnAnotherOccasionAndIEndedUpVomitingInMyHandAwkwardlyInFrontOfAFewPeople

I was trying to get out via a ladder, but lots of people kept jumping in so the water rose too high and I gulped some. I felt sick, but hoped the feeling would pass. I kept stopping in case I was sick, but thought I could get back to my towel and be okay. Tiago was with me as someone was watching B while we had a quick swim together. Suddenly I felt sick again, so put my hand to my mouth and some sadly sprayed out of the side of it. I felt embarrassed – especially with Covid and everything. Awkward. Tiago went back with water to clean it, but all evidence had already gone.

#OurConnectingFlightOnTheWayBackHasBeenDelayedByFiveHours #ThisMeansWeHaveANineHourLayoverAndWillProbablyGetHomeAtThreeInTheMorning #TheAirlinesDoNotCareWhichIsDisappointingSoWeWillHaveToSeeWhatWeCanDoOtherwiseWeWillHaveToJustDealWithIt

We have two flights by two different operators, but we bought them through one operator. The first flight is at 8am, then the second has been moved from 3pm to 8pm. Good job Tiago drove us to London as I was worried enough about catching a train with the 3pm flight (it’s a 3 hour flight). The airline we booked through don’t care, and say we can just have a refund – which isn’t great when you book months in advance for cheaper prices. The airline who delayed their flight have a first flight that is at 1pm, so that would save us waiting around so much at least but we’ll see what they say. It’s going to be a long day with a 14 month old and my pregnant belly, plus poor Tiago then has to drive us home.

#WeGotATimeAndDateForOur20WeekScanWhichIsAlsoInconvenientSoICalledAndSaidWhatDaysAreBestForUsAndTheyGivenUsAnotherInconvenientSlot

My Mum can watch B certain mornings. I said which days and they’ve given us another day where my Mum isn’t around.

#SoTiagoWillProbablyHaveToWaitWithBInTheCarAndIWillHaveToGoInAloneWhichIsAnnoyingButWhatCanWeDo

*Shrug* I’m annoyed about it, but oh well. I should call them again and complain possibly. I don’t like to be annoying and I know they’re busy.

#WeHaveTakenBToAMassiveDuckPondACoupleOfTimesWhichSheQuiteLikesAndILoveLookingAtAllTheDucklings #ThereAreNoDucksLikeTheOnesAtHomeSoItIsNiceToSeeSomeDifferentBirds

The first time we went it was early in the morning and very foggy, so we were the only ones there. The second time it was quite a bit busier. There are a lot of Muscovy ducks, some Appleyards, and some I don’t know. (My parents had ducks when I was younger.)

#IHadNeverBeenThereBeforeButIGuessThatOurPrioritiesHaveChangedNowWithBAndWeWantToGoToMoreKidFriendlyPlaces

We’ve been to a couple of swimming spots lately that I hadn’t been to before, as they’re closer and more kid friendly. I looked for a soft play or kid’s centre, but they don’t seem to have any around. Shame. Covid cases are quite low here. (I just checked and there are currently 14 people with confirmed Covid.)

#WeHaveBeenGoingToALittleCoffeeShopForBreakfastAndYesterdayBManagedToKnockTiagosCoffeeAllOverMyBreakfastAndMe

The guy had just set it all down, B went to go for my water and knocked the coffee over. I went to grab it, but realised I was too late so backed away and stood up. Luckily it just caught the end of my dress, as I didn’t want a burned belly!

#WhenWeWerePackingISaidIDidNotWantToBringManyClothesAsIEndUpWearingTheSameThreeOutfits #InRealityIHaveBeenWearingTheSameDressAndJustWashingItAndPuttingItOnAgainAsSoonAsPossible

Tiago’s Mum washed it and said she thought it was going to have a coffee stain on it, but once it dried it looked fine and I put it on again. It’s so humid here…

#WeHaveBeenRunningErrandsOrGoingToMeetFriendsWhileBSleepsAndTiagosMumKeepsAnEyeOnHer

It’s been nice to get out more, and have nice chats in the car.

#TheOtherNightWeWentToABarbequeAfterBHadGoneToBedButThenISpentTheWholeEveningSatByABabyAndAFourYearOldSoFeltBadForNotBringingHer

It’s nice that things are so kid friendly here. B had woken up early from her second nap (I think) so she had a very early bedtime, otherwise we could have brought her for a bit.

Tiago generally brings me home, then goes back out. He brought me home around 10.30pm and then got back at 2am. It’s good for him to see his friends, but I don’t know how he can stay out so late and then be fine in the morning.

#MyPortugueseSpeakingHasImprovedButIStillFindItDifficultToUnderstandWhatPeopleAreSaying

I feel motivated to try to find the time and energy to study more again – I’ve been a bit ‘lazy’ with all the pregnancies and mothering. We need to watch more kids stuff in Portuguese perhaps; I’ve been enjoying watching Bluey in Portuguese.

#IGetSoTiredSoQuicklyInTheEveningsWhenWeGoOutWhichIsProbablyDueToUsingExtraBrainPowerTryingAndGenerallyFailingToTranslate

Mothering, pregnancy plus extra brain work and socialising.

#ItIsNiceToSeePeopleButIHaveNotSocialisedThisMuchInAVeryLongTime

It is going to be a shock going home to quarantine for 10 days after being out so much. I need to make an effort to do more with B when we return, especially after I get my second jab.

17 weeks pregnant with B comparison:

Self-portrait with my hair covering the left side of my face. My right hand is pointing to where I had my whooping cough injection.
Whooping Cough Vaccine (17 Weeks)
 
#AtMyMidwifeAppointmentTheOtherDaySheSaidToGetTheWhoopingCoughVaccine
#YouHaveToBe16WeeksOrMoreAndIWasJustOver16WeeksSoIBookedAnAppointment
#IGoToTheAppointmentTodayAndAsWeAreWalkingToTheRoomTheWomanLooksAtMyBumpAndSaysNeverNeverNever
#WeSitDownAndSheIsLikeSoYouAreHereForTheWhoopingCoughVaccine
#AreYouPregnant
#YouHaveToBe16WeeksOrMore
#ISayIAm17Weeks
#SheLooksAtMeSuspiciouslyAsIGazeDownAtMyBump
#IStandUpAndPullMyTopInTightSoItAppears
#SheSaysWellIGuessYouKnowBetterYourself
#AndThereWasMeWorryingThatMyBumpWasTooBigForBeing17Weeks
#SoSheGaveMeItAndItWasAllDoneInSeconds
#IWasWaitingToDoAShootUntilAfterwardsAsIThoughtIWouldHaveAPlasterButIDidNot
#WhichIsFineAsIDidNotNeedOne
#ISaidIWouldDoAShootTodayWhereIWouldHaveATopOnAndIWouldFaceTheOtherDirection
#ButTheVaccineWasAtTheTopOfMyLeftArmSoItMadeSenseToDoItThisWay
#IGotHomeAndWasSoTiredThatIThoughtIWouldHaveANapFirst
#ISleptFor3Hours
#IHaveBeenFeelingMoreEnergeticButThisWeekWasSuperBusyAndIDidNotSleepInAsLateAsIPlanned
#IAmStillFeelingAnxiousAboutThingsAboutTheHealthOfTheBaby
#ButIAlsoRealisedTheOtherDayThatThisCouldBeTheOnlyTimeIAmEverPregnantInMyLife
#SoIShouldTryToEnjoyItAsMuchAsICan
#IDoNotKnowHowToReallyEnjoyItInTermsOfThereIsNotMuchICanDo
#ButIGuessIMeanMoreJustTryingNotToWorrySoMuch
#IGotReallyFreakedOutByTheFactThatThereIsSomeoneGrowingInsideMeAgainTheOtherDay
#PeopleAskMeIfIAmScaredOfGivingBirth
#IFeelKindOfExcitedByTheIdeaToBeHonest
#MaybeIMightChangeMyMindAsMyBumpGetsBigger
#ButIJustWantToEnjoyItAsMuchAsICanAsItSeemsLikeSuchABizarreThingThatWomenHaveBeenDoingForThousandsOfYears
#IDidNotStretchLastNightAndMyHipsHurtAllNight

This time no one mentioned to me about getting the whooping cough, so I will be getting it at around 27 weeks. No one will be saying that I don’t look pregnant enough for it this time…

It’s funning reading about ‘sleeping in late’. Now I’m like what is that? I should have relaxed more when I was pregnant with B. I used to waste so much time. Now I don’t have as much time to faff…

Definitely still anxious this time around.

I feel less excited about birth this time around, even though I would say I had a good experience with B. I am mentally trying to prepare myself though and am starting to read about things again. I am excited to meet her though…

Self-portrait wrapped up in a big cardigan that is suitable for breastfeeding.
Goodbye (For Now) Food Aversions (17 and a half weeks)
 
#IJustHadToRearrangeMy20WeekScanForASecondTime
#TheySendYouALetterForAnAppointmentInThePost
#ThenICalledUpToRescheduleItAsICouldNotMakeIt
#UsuallyTheyCheckToSeeWhatDateAndTimeICanDo
#ButThisTimeTheySaidTheDiariesWereNotOpenYetSoIWouldHaveToBeOnAWaitingList
#GotANewAppointmentDateAndTimeTodayWhichTiagoCouldNotDo
#ICouldHaveGoneAloneButTheHospitalIsQuiteFarAwayAndIThinkTiagoWantsToSeeTheBabyAsMuchAsIDo
#ThoughItIsAScanForAbnormalitiesWhichIsABitScary
#SoIWouldRatherThatTiagoIsThereTooJustIncaseItIsBadNews
#FingersCrossed
#InMorePleasantNewsALotOfMyFoodAversionsHaveDisappeared
#IHaveEatenIndianFood5TimesInTheLastWeek
#TiagoIsHappyAsHeCanCookALotOfHisUsualDishesAgain
#AndWeHadTakeawayFromOurFavouriteIndianPlaceLastWeekWhichGaveMe3Meals
#ItIsNiceToNotSitAtDinnerFeelingSickAndStrugglingToEat
#IAmAwareItMayReturnAtSomePointSoIAmJustTryingToEnjoyItWhilstICan
#TheMidwifeSaidIShouldBeEatingMorePulsesAndThingsLikeThat
#SoIAmGladThatLentilsAndChickpeasNoLongerRepulseMe
#IAmWearingOneOfMyFewPiecesOfMaternityClothing
#ItIsACardiganForPregnancyAndNursing
#ItMakesMeLookMorePregnant
#ApparentlyYouCanWearItInAFewDifferentWays
#ItWillProbablyBeHotToWearOnceTheBabyIsBornButItWillDoForNowAndForNextWinter
#ItDoesGetColdInLiverpool
#IDoNotWantToMakeAnyPurchasesForTheBabyUntilIAm6Months
#ButINeedToStartMakingASpreadsheetWithWhatWeWantToBuy
#IAmStillWorriedThatThingsMightGoWrongButIAmAlsoFeelingABitMoreRelaxed
#ItIsNiceToBeAbleToTalkAboutBeingPregnantWithMorePeopleWhenISeePeopleInPerson
#ItIsBecomingMoreObviousNowWithMyGrowingBumpButIWorryAboutBoringPeopleWithTalkingAboutItALot
#IHadToDoAFullYogaVideoLastNightAsINeededAGoodStretchAndIDefinitelyFeltBetter

Good to know that it’s been annoying getting an appointment for my 20 week scans both times.

I wasn’t into lentils and chickpeas at the start of this pregnancy either. B has baked beans on toast a lot and they were grossing me out, but I have started to have them for lunch lately (mid-October).

I didn’t wear this cardigan after having B, but it might be more appropriate with having a winter baby this time (B was a summer baby).

We really didn’t rush to buy anything for B, and thought we didn’t need much, but after she was born we bought LOADS.

It’s weird that in the end not many people saw me heavily pregnant with B.


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Categories
Pregnancy Waiting II

Portrait Of A Mother Of A Thirteen Month Old (11 Weeks? / 14th July 2021)

Me lying in bed hugging my pregnancy pillow, with a face mask sat on my forehead and with a hand to my mouth.
Portrait Of A Mother Of A Thirteen Month Old (11 Weeks? / 14th July 2021)

#ItSeemsQuiteFittingToTakeAPhotoOfMeLyingInBed
#IFeelLikeIDoSoAtAnyChanceIHaveNow
#IAmJustSoTiredAndItIsFunnyReadingBackOldEntriesWhenIDidNotKnowIWasPregnantYetAndJustSayingHowTiredIWas
#ISawAPregnantFriendTheOtherDayWhoAlsoHasOneKidAndSheWasSayingTheFirstTrimesterWasTheWorst
#IAmHopingMyEnergyWillReturnSoon
#IHaveFeltSoInspiredToMakeOtherWorkButJustHaveNoEnergyForIt
#IHaveBeenTryingToOnlySleepOnMyLeftSideButIAmFindingMyRightSideAndBackMoreComfortableAtTheMoment
#TalkingOfSleepingWeWentToLiverpoolForTheWeekendAndOnTheFirstDayBMissedHerSecondNap
#SheHadWokenUpFortyMinutesEarlyFromHerFirstOneWhichMeantMeTryingToEntertainHerInTheCarWhichWasUsJustReadingThroughAllOfHerBooks
#WePlannedToLetHerSleepInHerPushchairForHerSecondNapButWeWereOutForFortyMinutesWithNoSuchLuck
#ThenWeTriedToPutHerDownInACotButAfterFifteenMinutesWeGaveUpSoSheWasUpForNineHours
#WeGotIntoBedAtAroundEightAndWentToSleepAtNineThirty
#TheNextDayBHadASuperShortNapAfterWakingUpAtHerUsualTimeOfPreSix
#ButOnTheWayHomeSheSleptForTwoHoursAndICouldNotWakeHerUp
#IWasWorriedThatSheWasGoingToDropHerSecondNapButNotYetPhew
#YesterdaySomeoneWasAskingMeHowIKnewIWasReadyForASecondKidAndSheTalkedAboutHerFriendsGettingBroody
#IWasNotBroodyAtAllButIJustWantedToTryAndHaveASecondOneBeforeWeReallyKnewWhatWeWereInFor
#BIsBecomingDifficultToChangeAndOftenWillCryLoudlyForWhatSeemsLikeNoReasonAtAll
#TheOtherDayWeWereTryingToGiveHerYoghurtAndSheWasScreamingSoIJustCopiedHer
#StraightAwaySheChangedHerTuneAndStartedToLaughAndAteAllOfHerYoghurt
#ItMaybeIsNotTheBestSolutionEveryTimeButItWasMuchBetterThanGettingStressedOutAndAnnoyed
#AfterwardsWeHadAFunGameOfHerTryingToStealMyEmptyBowlOfCrispsWhenMyBackWasTurned
#SheIsBecomingQuiteTheFoodThiefTheseDaysWithHerTryingToTakeWhateverWeHave
#IHaveNotBeenSickInACoupleOfDaysButIHaveGaggedAFewTimes
#IThinkTheMoreTiredIAmTheWorseIFeelAsLastNightBeforeBedIFeltSoSickAndIWasAsleepBeforeTen
#IWasAwakeFromFourToFiveButThenCouldNotGetUpOnceBHad
#TheGovernmentHasChangedTheirStanceABitWithMasksAfter19thJulyButItSeemsLikeSomePeopleStoppedWearingThemAWhileAgo
#BsWalkingIsDefinitelyImprovingDayByDayNowAndSheCanTakeQuiteAFewStepsNow
#AtHerBabyClassSomeoneWasSayingSheFeelsLikeBIsTheCelebrityOfTheClassAsEveryoneKnowsHerName
#SheReallyLikesToTryToStealEveryonesStuffButEveryoneIsNiceAboutIt

#ItSeemsQuiteFittingToTakeAPhotoOfMeLyingInBed

Well, I am yet to take it yet but it is what I have in mind. Lying in bed with my eye mask on (the one I got as an emergency in case I had to go into hospital to give birth to B – which I did).

#IFeelLikeIDoSoAtAnyChanceIHaveNow

Tiago had gone out with B to the supermarket the other night (for the first time in ages). I was about to go to sleep when I could hear that my Uncles were visiting. ‘Why does it have to be today?’ But it was nice to see them.

(19th September: I was disappointed to miss them the other day as B and I were both napping, and they only made a short visit.)

#IAmJustSoTiredAndItIsFunnyReadingBackOldEntriesWhenIDidNotKnowIWasPregnantYetAndJustSayingHowTiredIWas

I was confused as to why I was so tired. I’m taking double the amount of iron now, and my vitamins, but I guess it is just a big part of the first trimester. Great.

#ISawAPregnantFriendTheOtherDayWhoAlsoHasOneKidAndSheWasSayingTheFirstTrimesterWasTheWorst

She also had sickness and just felt so tired. I actually think I might have mentioned this in my last post, but it was on my mind.

#IAmHopingMyEnergyWillReturnSoon

I hope so. I am getting into bed as soon as I finish writing this.

#IHaveFeltSoInspiredToMakeOtherWorkButJustHaveNoEnergyForIt

By the time my energy returns the inspiration may have gone. What can I do?

#IHaveBeenTryingToOnlySleepOnMyLeftSideButIAmFindingMyRightSideAndBackMoreComfortableAtTheMoment

It is early days, so I do not need to really worry about how I am sleeping yet but I try to sleep on my left anyways. Sometimes I want to sleep on my front, but I am avoiding it.

#TalkingOfSleepingWeWentToLiverpoolForTheWeekendAndOnTheFirstDayBMissedHerSecondNap

It was a friend’s first birthday, so she obviously did not want to miss a minute of it.

#SheHadWokenUpFortyMinutesEarlyFromHerFirstOneWhichMeantMeTryingToEntertainHerInTheCarWhichWasUsJustReadingThroughAllOfHerBooks

I say us. I mean it was me reading to her. I was hoping to have a nap, so I was tired, and Tiago was also tired from driving. Tired family.

#WePlannedToLetHerSleepInHerPushchairForHerSecondNapButWeWereOutForFortyMinutesWithNoSuchLuck

Nothing like pushing B round a park screaming. (Her, not me.)

#ThenWeTriedToPutHerDownInACotButAfterFifteenMinutesWeGaveUpSoSheWasUpForNineHours

She did not seem that tired though.

#WeGotIntoBedAtAroundEightAndWentToSleepAtNineThirty

B had gone to bed at 7:50. Brushed teeth and into bedddd.

#TheNextDayBHadASuperShortNapAfterWakingUpAtHerUsualTimeOfPreSix

She will usually have 2 hours if she’s up that early, but it was more like 40 minutes.

#ButOnTheWayHomeSheSleptForTwoHoursAndICouldNotWakeHerUp

I did not want her to sleep for that long as I was worried she would have a super late bedtime. She went to bed at 7:45pm, as the England v Italy game was at 8pm and it was fine. She slept until her usual time.

#IWasWorriedThatSheWasGoingToDropHerSecondNapButNotYetPhew

I am not ready yet.

#YesterdaySomeoneWasAskingMeHowIKnewIWasReadyForASecondKidAndSheTalkedAboutHerFriendsGettingBroody #IWasNotBroodyAtAllButIJustWantedToTryAndHaveASecondOneBeforeWeReallyKnewWhatWeWereInFor

It’s really down to wanting two kids and feeling like I’m not up to much at the moment besides looking after B, so it seems like a good time to try to have another one. My body felt strong enough. I have been so anxious this week about the pregnancy, but I am trying to stay calm. Two weeks until my first scan…

#BIsBecomingDifficultToChangeAndOftenWillCryLoudlyForWhatSeemsLikeNoReasonAtAll

I am still struggling to change her nappies, and then add in her excessive wriggling and escaping. It’s great.

#TheOtherDayWeWereTryingToGiveHerYoghurtAndSheWasScreamingSoIJustCopiedHer

I remember my Mum doing it with me when I was crying crocodile tears.

#StraightAwaySheChangedHerTuneAndStartedToLaughAndAteAllOfHerYoghurt

Nothing like laughter to get you out of a bad mood. I think she is teething a lot at the moment, so that might be why.

#ItMaybeIsNotTheBestSolutionEveryTimeButItWasMuchBetterThanGettingStressedOutAndAnnoyed

Obviously if she was really upset it would not be a nice thing to do, but when it seems like she just doesn’t want to do something it is a nice trick. I’d rather make her laugh than get really pissed off.

#AfterwardsWeHadAFunGameOfHerTryingToStealMyEmptyBowlOfCrispsWhenMyBackWasTurned

I had some crisps in the bowl. She was trying to eat them. I then put the bowl on the table and she kept going to it and digging her hands in. Later on I had my back to her and she would touch the bowl while my back was turned, then I’d turn round to look at her and she would laugh. I do love when she laughs.

#SheIsBecomingQuiteTheFoodThiefTheseDaysWithHerTryingToTakeWhateverWeHave

She was trying to eat my Nan’s breakfast again today. I had some strawberries the other night and my plate was empty, but she would just scratch the plate anyways and then lick her fingers. She is funny.

#IHaveNotBeenSickInACoupleOfDaysButIHaveGaggedAFewTimes

Nothing like going to the bathroom and expecting to be sick, but just dry heaving instead. Or sometimes it is just when I am in the kitchen. The body is weird.

#IThinkTheMoreTiredIAmTheWorseIFeelAsLastNightBeforeBedIFeltSoSickAndIWasAsleepBeforeTen

I hadn’t napped during her second nap, so I felt tired. When I get tired I faff, but I should just relax instead. I was going to hang up the washing, but I stood up and thought I was going to be sick. I had to lie down in bed as I had already brushed my teeth and did not fancy being sick.

#IWasAwakeFromFourToFiveButThenCouldNotGetUpOnceBHad

I read some of my book to try to feel sleepy again. T and B were up from 5:40. I slept for another hour. Thanks Tiago.

#TheGovernmentHasChangedTheirStanceABitWithMasksAfter19thJulyButItSeemsLikeSomePeopleStoppedWearingThemAWhileAgo

Though I’ve just seen that masks will still be mandatory on London transport. That’s good.

#BsWalkingIsDefinitelyImprovingDayByDayNowAndSheCanTakeQuiteAFewStepsNow

She can do more than a few really. Ten plus quite confidently, maybe more? I need to get her some shoes. I’ve ordered a foot measurer, so we can just measure them when we want to and order online.

#AtHerBabyClassSomeoneWasSayingSheFeelsLikeBIsTheCelebrityOfTheClassAsEveryoneKnowsHerName

I feel bad as I do not know many of the names (unless I think back to the register), but the teachers are always commenting on what B is doing. She was scared of some animal puppets again yesterday 🙁

#SheReallyLikesToTryToStealEveryonesStuffButEveryoneIsNiceAboutIt

Shoes, phones, toys, pushchairs, whatever. If it is there B will have it.

I maybe have time for an hour nap if my brain switches off quick enough…

11 weeks pregnant with B comparison:

A close-up of my face showing a couple of spots in my hairline.
I Feel Like My Body Has A Big Job To Perform Now (11 weeks)

#FeelingConcernedAsIHaveNotFeltSickThisEveningButIFeltSickDuringTheDay 
#MaybeIHaveJustEatenEnoughDinner 
#IWillProbablyFeelSickInAnHour 
#IHeardThatSourSweetsAreGoodForSickness 
#IFoundSomeGoodVeggieSweets 
#DoNotThinkTheyReallyHelpedWithTheSicknessButTheyTasteGood 
#Anyways 
#ThisTextIsSupposedToBeAboutSpots 
#WhenIHadTheCoilISuddenlyStartedToGetLotsOfSpotsOnMyScalp 
#IFiguredItWasDueToTooMuchCopperInMyDietAndInMyBody 
#SoMaybeIHaveBeenEatingALotOfThingsThatHaveCopperInThem 
#ButIDoubtIt 
#IGuessTheSpotsAreMoreToDoWithHormones 
#MyFaceFeelsSpottierTooButIThinkThatHasALotToDoWithTheWeather 
#AsMySkinGetsWorseThanNormalInTheWinter 
#ButIHaveBigSpotsOnMyHairline 
#INoticedThemTheOtherDayButTheySeemBiggerNow 
#FunTimes 
#MaybeINeedToWashMyHairMoreAndIHaveBeenWearingAHat 
#SoMaybeThatPlaysAPartInIt 
#CanNotBelieveIAm11WeeksNow 
#StillNervous 
#TiagoCanNotLieToSaveHisLifeSoHeToldAFewPeopleYesterday 
#SoTheNumberOfPeopleWhoKnowHasNowGrown 
#IJustFeelMorePressureNow 
#NoOneIsPuttingPressureOnMe 
#ButIFeelLikeMyBodyHasABigJobToPerformNow 
#AndIAmNervousThatThereIsPlentyOfTimeForThingsToGoWrong 
#NotFeelingSickNowIsABitWorrying 
#ButIThinkThatIWillGoBrushMyTeethNowAndThatWillProbablyMakeMeFeelSick 

(19th September: Using an image with a border as my laptop stopped charging the other day, and T’s laptop seems incapable of opening editing software – I also have to paste the letter s whenever I want to use it. I am hoping to have my own again in a few days.)

I have felt just as anxious this time as I did with B. I haven’t eaten any sour sweets (I actually forgot about this), but I was eyeing up someone’s sweets on the train the other day.

My face was spotty for a bit, which was probably hormones.

I have been washing my hair even less probably, but it doesn’t look too bad.

I am now 20 weeks and I dry heave again when I brush my teeth in the evenings. This has gone on for longer than when I was pregnant with B…

I feel like I do have a big job ahead of me again, but I am a bit more relaxed about it in ways as I have been through it all once before, and I am feeling a bit more like what will happen will happen – though obviously I am hoping for the best outcomes. Fingers crossed.


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Categories
Pregnancy Waiting II

Mum Looks #1 (10 Weeks? / 11th June 2021)

Self-portrait of myself wearing a colourful top and shorts. I have a book tucked into the back of my shorts and a pig puppet hanging out of my pocket.
Mum Looks #1 (10 Weeks? / 11th June 2021)
 
#ThisIsHowICarriedAPuppetAndABookUpTheStairsTheOtherDayWhileHoldingB
#ThePuppetUsedToDistractHerDuringNappyChangesButNowALittleMusicalPianoWorksBetter
#TheBookIsTheVeryHungryCaterpillarWhichBLikesALot
#NotLongAgoIWasTalkingToAnotherMumAboutAnUpcomingBookFestivalWhereAuthorsWillReadTheirBooks
#IJokedThatAllOfBsFavouriteAuthorsAreDeadAsIThoughtThatEricCarleHadDiedALongTimeAgo
#IWasSurprisedAfterAQuickOnlineSearchThatHeWasStillAliveButThenHeDiedACoupleOfWeeksLater
#IWasSupposedToHaveMyFirstVaccineThisWeekButAfterALotOfResearchIDecidedToWaitUntilIAmInMySecondTrimester
#TheBabyDevelopsSoMuchInTheFirstTrimesterAndIAmFeelingSoSick
#TheyDoNotKnowTheLongTermEffectsOfTheVaccinationsOnUnbornBabiesSoIWouldRatherWaitABit
#IrelandSuggestsWaitingUntil14WeeksToGetTheVaccineAndIHaveSeenThatInAFewPlaces
#SoIJustNeedToBeCarefulAndTryNotToGetCovidBeforeThen
#InABabyClassTheOtherDayWeDidNotHaveToWearAMaskWhenWeWereSatDown
#AndInATakeawayAGuyWalkedInWithoutAMaskButIPlanToKeepWearingMineUntilIGetAVaccine
#IAmStartingToThinkThatMaybeIAmMoreSixWeeksPregnantThanTen
#IThinkIWouldHaveBeenFeelingThisSickForLongerIfIWasTenWeeks
#ButIWasAlsoSoConvincedThatIWasPregnantWhenIWouldHaveOnlyBeenTwoWeeksIfIAmOnlySixWeeksNow
#ItHasBeenGoodThatTiagoHadThisWeekOffAsItMeansIHaveHadPlentyOfTimeToRest
#WeHaveNotDoneMuchButThatIsFineAsIHaveBeenFeelingSoTiredAndSick
#BWokeUpAtSixFortyTodayRatherThanFiveFortyWhichWasABitOfARelief
#WeHaveSatInTheParkAlotAndTodayWePlanToGoToAWildlifeCentre
#IUpdatedHerBabyBookTheOtherDaySoItIsNearlyCompleteNow
#IFeelLikeTheSecondKidWillNotHaveSuchAGoodOneButINeedToMakeTheEffortToMakeSureTheyHaveSomething
#TheWombMustBeQuiteResilientToDealWithPregnantPeopleLookingAfterKids
#BIsAlwaysFallingOnMeOrUsingMyStomachAsASupportPost
#IHaveAlreadyHadMoreKnocksToMyStomachThanIDidDuringMyWholePregnancyWithHer
#LastTimeWhenIWasPregnantIGotALetterFromTheMidwivesAfterTwoDays
#LastNightIGotATextFromMyDoctorsSayingINeedToPickAReferralLetterUpFromReception
#IAmGuessingItIsToDoWithTheMidwivesButItSeemsWeirdThatTheyDoNotPostOrEmailIt
#WellIWentToPickUpMyLetterUpAndIHaveCalledTheHospital
#TheyHavePutMeDownAsSixWeeksForNowAndApparentlyTheyDoNotHaveABedForMeAtTheDueDateIfIAmTenWeeks

(20th August: This probably won’t become a mini-series, but maybe it should. I think my whole project is just Mum Looks – me looking dishevelled.)

#ThisIsHowICarriedAPuppetAndABookUpTheStairsTheOtherDayWhileHoldingB

I tried to take a photo of my look on my phone at the time, but it was hard.

#ThePuppetUsedToDistractHerDuringNappyChangesButNowALittleMusicalPianoWorksBetter

I think it plays about four tunes automatically and I seem to know which one is coming next now. (If I know which one is coming I should know how many it has, but I can’t be bothered to work it out.)

(20th August: It has four. Now I just use any tactic to get her to stay still. Earlier I was using her bath toy, but sometimes it’s a tub with the lid screwed on tight, or a book or anything.)

#TheBookIsTheVeryHungryCaterpillarWhichBLikesALot

I haven’t read it to her in a few days, which I am somewhat happy about as I need a break from it.

#NotLongAgoIWasTalkingToAnotherMumAboutAnUpcomingBookFestivalWhereAuthorsWillReadTheirBooks

I think a lot of children’s authors will be present.

#IJokedThatAllOfBsFavouriteAuthorsAreDeadAsIThoughtThatEricCarleHadDiedALongTimeAgo

She was a Mum at the park and we had a very brief conversation. She likes a lot of Pam Adams’ books and I just looked and she died in 2010…

#IWasSurprisedAfterAQuickOnlineSearchThatHeWasStillAliveButThenHeDiedACoupleOfWeeksLater

RIP Eric Carle. We like his From Head To Toe book too.

#IWasSupposedToHaveMyFirstVaccineThisWeekButAfterALotOfResearchIDecidedToWaitUntilIAmInMySecondTrimester

It was stressing me out, so now I am glad I decided to wait.

(20th August: I ended up getting the vaccine at 13 weeks after advice became a bit more consistent. I was also swayed by a talk by Pregnant Then Screwed and Viki Male, an immunologist. Here is the talk on Instagram.)

#TheBabyDevelopsSoMuchInTheFirstTrimesterAndIAmFeelingSoSick #TheyDoNotKnowTheLongTermEffectsOfTheVaccinationsOnUnbornBabiesSoIWouldRatherWaitABit

Research shows that babies are being born fine, but it is too early to know if there are long term effects and when is best to get the vaccine.

I’m feeling sick all of the time so I don’t want to get ill on top of it if I have a bad reaction…

#IrelandSuggestsWaitingUntil14WeeksToGetTheVaccineAndIHaveSeenThatInAFewPlaces

I saw on Twitter that a country (not sure which one) was offering the vaccine to women over 14 weeks. The UK and my doctor say all trimesters are fine, but I’d rather wait…

#SoIJustNeedToBeCarefulAndTryNotToGetCovidBeforeThen

I’ve managed it this far, but you never know.

#InABabyClassTheOtherDayWeDidNotHaveToWearAMaskWhenWeWereSatDown

I walked in and was like ‘why does everyone look different?’ After a while a couple more women walked in wearing them, but the teacher said we don’t have to wear them while sat down. I took mine off, though I wanted to keep it on. Next time I will as B runs off a lot so I need to get up and pick her up.

#AndInATakeawayAGuyWalkedInWithoutAMaskButIPlanToKeepWearingMineUntilIGetAVaccine

I shouldn’t let my awkwardness affect my personal safety. Maybe it’s unnecessary but I do not want to risk it.

I definitely will have a vaccine in my second trimester as getting Covid in the third trimester is quite dangerous for a pregnant person.

#IAmStartingToThinkThatMaybeIAmMoreSixWeeksPregnantThanTen

This ball of fun again.

#IThinkIWouldHaveBeenFeelingThisSickForLongerIfIWasTenWeeks

Looking at my Waiting project I was feeling sick at 6 weeks and by 8 weeks I felt really bad.

#ButIWasAlsoSoConvincedThatIWasPregnantWhenIWouldHaveOnlyBeenTwoWeeksIfIAmOnlySixWeeksNow

With B I had a period of two days, then it stopped so I thought it was weird, did a pregnancy test and I was about 4 weeks.

Earlier in the year when I was pregnant I had a period of sorts, then I was starting to wake up feeling sick and I was pregnant. About 6 weeks.

This time I had a normal period, then what seemed like a normal period, then a missed period. Then I did a test. I was feeling a bit sick before my missed period/or imagining things as I wanted to be pregnant. ?

#ItHasBeenGoodThatTiagoHadThisWeekOffAsItMeansIHaveHadPlentyOfTimeToRest

I am going to struggle when he goes back to work next week.

#WeHaveNotDoneMuchButThatIsFineAsIHaveBeenFeelingSoTiredAndSick

It’s been nice to just chill at home with T being available.

#BWokeUpAtSixFortyTodayRatherThanFiveFortyWhichWasABitOfARelief

Her heating comes on for a bit between 4 and 5, but it has been the last few days so who knows why she slept better today?

#WeHaveSatInTheParkAlotAndTodayWePlanToGoToAWildlifeCentre

Simple things. Hopefully she likes the centre today.

#IUpdatedHerBabyBookTheOtherDaySoItIsNearlyCompleteNow

Hurrah. I hadn’t looked at in a few months.

#IFeelLikeTheSecondKidWillNotHaveSuchAGoodOneButINeedToMakeTheEffortToMakeSureTheyHaveSomething

Or I need to change the way I do it. I’d feel bad if they didn’t have one.

#TheWombMustBeQuiteResilientToDealWithPregnantPeopleLookingAfterKids #BIsAlwaysFallingOnMeOrUsingMyStomachAsASupportPost #IHaveAlreadyHadMoreKnocksToMyStomachThanIDidDuringMyWholePregnancyWithHer

It freaks me out a bit when she touches my stomach, but I’m sure the baby is well protected.

#LastTimeWhenIWasPregnantIGotALetterFromTheMidwivesAfterTwoDays

Even though my Doctor said there was a massive delay with them.

#LastNightIGotATextFromMyDoctorsSayingINeedToPickAReferralLetterUpFromReception #IAmGuessingItIsToDoWithTheMidwivesButItSeemsWeirdThatTheyDoNotPostOrEmailIt

So it took longer to do the referral letter this time than it did for me to get a letter in the post this time? I know they’re busy. Maybe they thought it would be quicker for me to pick it up. It seems weird though. I’m going to go pick it up now.

#WellIWentToPickUpMyLetterUpAndIHaveCalledTheHospital

I guess they say to pick it up from reception now as the Doctors is operating more like in the ‘old days’ now. No having to wait outside for ages – the door was open.

I got myself a veggie samosa from a nearby shop on the way back and it was good.

#TheyHavePutMeDownAsSixWeeksForNowAndApparentlyTheyDoNotHaveABedForMeAtTheDueDateIfIAmTenWeeks

She said only I could say what date to put me down as. I said for 10 weeks. She said ‘well there are no beds left for then’. So I said to put me down as 6 weeks for now and we will have to see. If I wanted to be put down as 10 weeks a letter had to be sent to the higher ups or something, and maybe I am just 6 weeks. What a faff.

She said the first appointment will either be on the phone or in person. Last time they told me it would be on the phone, so things are changing.

(20th August: I was only 6 weeks here.)

6 weeks pregnant with B comparison:

Self-portrait of me sat with a purple scarf over myself. My left hand is just below my lips and I am gazing off and look deep in thought, though possibly just feeling sick.
Morning Sickness Is Not Only A Morning Thing (6 and a half weeks)
 
#SoTheSicknessComesAndGoes
#MorningSicknessIsSuchALie
#IAskedTheDoctorIfSheHadAnyTipsAfterIFirstWentWhenIFoundOut
#SheSaidThatMorningSicknessIsNotOnlyAMorningThing
#WellSheDidNotLie
#SometimesItIsTheMorning
#YesterdayICouldHaveBeenSickOverEverything
#LastWeekItWasMoreAnAfternoonThing
#ButSometimesItIsTheEvening
#SomeoneWasTalkingAboutWarmCamelsMilkTheOtherDay
#AndItWasMakingMeSoIll
#ThenILookedAtMyCollectionOfSoups
#AndJustReadingTheFlavoursMadeMeFeelIll
#ItIsSuchAWeirdThing
#IKnowThatNoOneReallyLikesToVomit
#ButIReallyHateIt
#IOnceProudlyCouldSayIHadNotVomitedInAtLeast10Years
#AndThenMyHousemateMadeMeSuperStrongRumCocktailsWhenIWasDoingMyBA
#AndThatWasGrim
#AndACharmingExBoyfriendTookPolaroidsOfMeByTheToilet 
#EvenThoughHeWasSickMostWeekendsBecauseOfAlcohol
#IDoNotKnowWhatHappenedToThosePolaroids
#BetTheyShowUpIn50Years
#Anyways
#YesterdayIHadStrongMeatAndFishCravingsEvenThoughIHaveBeenVegetarianForOverHalfMyLife
#CouldHaveEasilyEatenCodAndChipsOrATurkeyAndStuffingSandwich
#ThoughIThinkTheyWouldHaveMadeMeSick
#SoLastNightISettledForAVeganFishFreeBurger
#ItWasProbablyTheFirstTimeIHadEatenAFishBurger
#AndItWasAlrightButIWouldNotBeInARushToEatItAgain

Morning sickness is definitely a lie. With B I was generally sick in the mornings though struggled to eat anything at dinner except for pasta. This time I have been mostly sick in the evenings.

I didn’t like soup again this time and things like baked beans.

I haven’t had strong meat and fish cravings this time, though I’ve been taking double the amount of iron lately.

The bit about my ex-boyfriend taking pictures of me vomiting isn’t pleasant, but it’s true. Now I just take pictures of myself after vomiting…


Thanks for reading! If you’re enjoying my blog (and/or the work I make) please consider supporting me by ‘buying me a coffee’ on Ko-fi – thanks!

Categories
Pregnancy Waiting II

I Just Want To Know How Pregnant I Am (9 Weeks? / 3rd June 2021)

A duvet cover hangs in the background as a backdrop. I am facing the left of the image with my hand on my hip. I am wearing a dark blue top and black leggings. Half of my hair is tied up in a messy bun, and I am arching my back.
I Just Want To Know How Pregnant I Am (9 Weeks? / 3rd June 2021)
 
#AmIFiveWeeksOrNineWeeksIJustWantToKnow
#IThinkIAmNineButIWillNotKnowForSureUntilADatingScan
#ThisPictureIsImitatingAPictureITookOfMyselfInJanuaryWhenIMayHaveBeenSevenWeeksPregnant
#ItIsWeirdThinkingHowPregnantICouldHaveBeenRightNow
#IAmNotLookingForwardToBDroppingANapSoonAsILikeHavingTimeToRestAndDoMyOwnStuffWhenSheSleeps
#IAmQuiteTiredAndISeemToWakeUpALotInTheNightNowButFindItHardToNapDuringTheDay
#IAmNotSureIfThisIsDueToBeingPregnantOrIfItIsBecauseOfTheWeather
#TheOtherDayBeforeITookTheTestTiagoSaidIMustBePregnantAsHeSawAMagpieAndSpokeToIt
#WhenHeWasOutsideOfTheHospitalWaitingForNewsOnMeBeforeBWasBornHeSpokeToAMagpieForReassurance
#ThisAllSoundsWeirdAndIsVeryUnlikeTiagoButIGuessInAnxiousTimesWeTakeComfortInWhatWeCan
#SpeakingOfBirdsAsItHasBeenSoHotBAndMeHaveJustBeenPlayingInTheGardenALot
#TheOtherDayIRealisedThatThereIsABlackbirdsNextRightByOurFavouriteSpotInTheShade
#FromTimeToTimeWeHaveToMoveAsICanSeeTheParentBlackbirdsWaitingWithFoodInTheirMouths
#TheyWillNotFlyToTheNestWhileWeAreAroundAsIThinkTheyThinkItIsTopSecretOrSomething
#IOnlyFoundItAsIHeardTheChicksCheepingAndRealisedTheyWereReallyCloseBy
#SoNowIHaveStartedToTakeBToTheParkMoreAndWeSitInTheShadeThere
#ItIsLessStressfulAsInTheGardenBHasALeafInHerMouthEveryFiveSeconds
#SheIsGettingCheekierEveryDay
#SometimesIPretendToChaseHerAndSheLaughsThoughSheGenerallyJustCrawlsIntoADeadEnd
#NanSaidThatYesterdayBTookAStepAndIDidNotReallyBelieveHer
#ThenThisMorningBWasStoodUpInFrontOfMeAndThenDidStepOnce
#SheIsStillBuildingUpHerStrengthButIsGettingBetterWithHerWalker
#SheAlsoHasASecondToothNowWhichMustHaveBeenWhySheKeptWakingUpSoMuchOneNightLastWeek
#BIsGettingMoreFidgetyAndHarderToChangeSoIDoWorryHowItWillBeIfAndWhenIAmMorePregnant
#IHaveToSingHerFavouritePortugueseSongsToTryToChillHerOutButTheyDoNotAlwaysWork
#IGetNervousEveryTimeIGoToTheBathroom
#EspeciallyIfIHaveNotLongHadACramp
#INeedToRememberThatGoodishCrampsExistTooAsItIsJustASignOfThingsStretching
#IAmTryingToBeatMyselfUpLessAboutMyMotheringNow
#AsLongAsIAmTryingMyBestThenThatIsAllICanDo

#AmIFiveWeeksOrNineWeeksIJustWantToKnow

I feel like I have/had too many symptoms to only be 5 but you never know. I do worry that my body was faking some as I thought I may be.

#IThinkIAmNineButIWillNotKnowForSureUntilADatingScan

Just got to wait for my doctor to call me next week then we can get the ball rolling.

(8th August: I can not believe that I thought I was 9 weeks. I know I just wanted to be further along than I was, but yeah… this photo shows nothing. I was 5 weeks here. I’m a bit embarrassed of this picture, but oh well.)

#ThisPictureIsImitatingAPictureITookOfMyselfInJanuaryWhenIMayHaveBeenSevenWeeksPregnant

I haven’t done the shoot yet, but that is what I intend to copy.

(8th August: Here is the original with hashtags –

A duvet cover hangs in the background as a backdrop. I am facing the left of the image with my hand on my hip. I am wearing a dark blue top and black leggings. Half of my hair is tied up in a messy bun, and I am arching my back.
I Worry When I Do Not Feel Sick (7 Weeks / 23rd January 2021)
 
#IWorryWhenIDoNotFeelSickButThenIRealiseIDoSoThenIDrinkWaterAndIFeelBetter
#SometimesICanFeelASlightTickleInMyTummyButItProbablyJustThingsStartingToStretchAgain
#TheDoctorSaidNotToExpectToHearFromTheHospitalAnytimeSoonButIGotALetterInThePostTwoDaysAfterOurCallSayingToGiveThemARing
#TheySaidThereIsABacklogForAppointmentsDueToCovidButTheyWillDoTheAppointmentsWhenTheyCan
#TheFirstAppointmentWillJustBeOverThePhoneThisTimeToTakeDetailsWhichIsFine
#TheSecondAppointmentWillBeInPersonAndTheyWillDoTheBloodTestsThenAndOtherChecks
#LastTimeTheyTriedToDoABloodTestAtMyFirstAppointmentButTheyCouldNotAsMyBodySaidNo
#ThenTheyMadeMeGoSomewhereElseToGetItDoneButTheySaidItWasAWasteOfTimeAsTheyWouldDoABloodTestAtMyNextAppointmentSoItSeemsLikeABetterStreamlinedProcessThisTime
#ThoughIThinkBecauseItIsMySecondPregnancyTheyAreLessConcernedAndThereAreUsuallyLessAppointments
#NanSaidThatIWasStartingToShowTheOtherDayButIWasWearingATightTopAndIHadNotLongEatenDinner
#IHaveSaidBeforeThatIFindTheTermBabyBrainInsultingButIHaveBeenDoingDaftThingsLately
#HoweverIWasABitLikeThisAtTheBeginningOfMyLastPregnancyAsIThinkIJustHaveALotOnMyMind
#WithBGoingDownToA2NapScheduleIAmStillGettingUsedToWorkingOutTheTimingsAndWorryingAboutBTakesUpABitPartOfMyBrainSpaceRightNow
#IPutAJumperOnInsideOutWithTheLabelAtTheFrontTheOtherDay
#TiagoKeepsForgettingThatIAmPregnant
#WhenIWasPregnantWithBHeKeptTalkingToMyBumpAndWasSoSureThatTheBabyWouldBeABoy
#HeAskedIfThisTimeIfHeCallsItAGirlItWillTurnOutToBeABoy
#WeWillProbablyFindOutTheGenderThisTimeIfWeCanAsIThinkFindingNamesWeBothAgreeOnWillBeAStruggle
#ItWasWeirdHearingTTalkToMyBellyAndMentionItsSisterB
#IAmImaginingBWithTheBabyAndInMyMindItIsRidiculouslyCute
#WeWantedTwoKidsButNowIAmABitLikeWhatHaveWeSignedUpFor
#ItWillBeFineAndWeWillGetUsedToItButItIsOddThinkingOfUsHavingTwoKids
#IStillFindItWeirdThatIHaveAChildAndBIsNow7MonthsOld
#IHopeThatSheLikesHavingASiblingAndThatTheyGetAlong
#IAmStillNervousAboutHowThePregnancyWillGo
#AWomanWhoCallsMeEvery2WeeksToCheckOnMeTaughtMeAGoodMindfulnessExercise
#BasicallyYouSay5ThingsYouCanSee4ThingsYouCanFeel3ThingsYouCanHear2ThingsYouCanSmellAnd1ThingYouCanTaste
#IGuessItIsAGoodCovidTestAsWell
#LookingBackAtMyLastPregnancyProjectItIsAwkwardHowBellyOrientatedItIsButThatIsTheMainThingThatChangesAboutYouWhenYouArePregnant
#ThisShootWillJustBeAboutHavingSomethingToCompareLaterPregnancyTo
 

)

#ItIsWeirdThinkingHowPregnantICouldHaveBeenRightNow

I can’t be bothered to figure it out, but I guess I would have been due in a few months?

#IAmNotLookingForwardToBDroppingANapSoonAsILikeHavingTimeToRestAndDoMyOwnStuffWhenSheSleeps

I’ll just have to change how I do things. I am worried more because of how tired I may be when I am pregnant. If that’s the case then we might need to look into B going to nursery here and there. I am a bit worried that she might miss out on things the more pregnant I get, but we will have to see and I just need to rest more.

#IAmQuiteTiredAndISeemToWakeUpALotInTheNightNowButFindItHardToNapDuringTheDay

I seem to wake up at 5am every day, plus multiple other times. Great.

#IAmNotSureIfThisIsDueToBeingPregnantOrIfItIsBecauseOfTheWeather

It has been HOT this week. Luckily today it is a bit cooler.

#TheOtherDayBeforeITookTheTestTiagoSaidIMustBePregnantAsHeSawAMagpieAndSpokeToIt #WhenHeWasOutsideOfTheHospitalWaitingForNewsOnMeBeforeBWasBornHeSpokeToAMagpieForReassurance #ThisAllSoundsWeirdAndIsVeryUnlikeTiagoButIGuessInAnxiousTimesWeTakeComfortInWhatWeCan

I just had a dig through our old messages…

‘Just had a magpie sitting [on the traffic sign] next to me’

Me: Nice!

‘Asked him twice if he was the bearer of good news and he replied two times and then took off haha’

I just went to ask him about this more recent incident. He said they always come to him with good news, especially on the days he needs it.

#SpeakingOfBirdsAsItHasBeenSoHotBAndMeHaveJustBeenPlayingInTheGardenALot

It’s been too hot to go for walks.

#TheOtherDayIRealisedThatThereIsABlackbirdsNextRightByOurFavouriteSpotInTheShade

I heard cheeping, realised it was close, found the nest…

#FromTimeToTimeWeHaveToMoveAsICanSeeTheParentBlackbirdsWaitingWithFoodInTheirMouths

This is what made me realise that it was a blackbird nest.

#TheyWillNotFlyToTheNestWhileWeAreAroundAsIThinkTheyThinkItIsTopSecretOrSomething

It did take me a while to see it at first. It’s a good spot. Kudos to them.

#IOnlyFoundItAsIHeardTheChicksCheepingAndRealisedTheyWereReallyCloseBy

I can’t see into the nest, so I want to get a stepladder and have a look. I’m somewhat nervous to in case a parent sees me and attacks me.

#SoNowIHaveStartedToTakeBToTheParkMoreAndWeSitInTheShadeThere

We do not want to disturb the birds. It was so hot walking to the park yesterday, but I wanted to get out.

#ItIsLessStressfulAsInTheGardenBHasALeafInHerMouthEveryFiveSeconds

She must have eaten a fair few leaves the other day. She eats some in the park too, but not as much for some reason.

#SheIsGettingCheekierEveryDay

I like it.

#SometimesIPretendToChaseHerAndSheLaughsThoughSheGenerallyJustCrawlsIntoADeadEnd

It’ll be fun as she gets older and realises how to actually crawl away from me.

#NanSaidThatYesterdayBTookAStepAndIDidNotReallyBelieveHer

I don’t know why, but it just seemed hard to believe.

#ThenThisMorningBWasStoodUpInFrontOfMeAndThenDidStepOnce

It was more just stepping her feet wider apart but she has to start somewhere!

#SheIsStillBuildingUpHerStrengthButIsGettingBetterWithHerWalker

The other day she was pushing it and I was pretending to scream and run away from her. She just needs to learn to turn it round/to avoid things.

#SheAlsoHasASecondToothNowWhichMustHaveBeenWhySheKeptWakingUpSoMuchOneNightLastWeek

Two front bottom teeth. I’m not looking forward to all the others coming through if she wakes up as much as she did that night…

#BIsGettingMoreFidgetyAndHarderToChangeSoIDoWorryHowItWillBeIfAndWhenIAmMorePregnant

Fun times ahead.

I say if and when as it is still early days and I am nervous.

#IHaveToSingHerFavouritePortugueseSongsToTryToChillHerOutButTheyDoNotAlwaysWork

I just sing all the songs from this compilation (quite badly and with most of the wrong lyrics. She gets so excited when she can tell that I’m going to put YouTube on.

#IGetNervousEveryTimeIGoToTheBathroom #EspeciallyIfIHaveNotLongHadACramp

I am not looking forward to more months of worry. I want this baby but it is so stressful.

#INeedToRememberThatGoodishCrampsExistTooAsItIsJustASignOfThingsStretching

Stretching and cleaning. My body has a lot of changing to do.

#IAmTryingToBeatMyselfUpLessAboutMyMotheringNow #AsLongAsIAmTryingMyBestThenThatIsAllICanDo

I need to conserve my energy. I worry that B might miss out on things the more pregnant I get but at least we have more support here. Would I be pregnant now if we lived in Liverpool still? Maybe, maybe not.


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Categories
Oh Me, Oh Mãe

Portrait Of A Mother Of An Eleven Month Old (15th May 2021)

A headshot with me looking at the camera, with my hair up and wearing a black and white striped top with a slight neck.
Portrait Of A Mother Of An Eleven Month Old (15th May 2021)
 
#ICanNotBelieveThatBIsNearlyAYearOld
#WhatAWeirdYearItHasBeen
#ITookThisPhotoAsSoonAsIGotOutOfBed
#IProbablyShouldHaveTakenItHalfAnHourEarlierButIWasWaitingForTiagoToGetBUpAsSheWasMakingNoise
#AndTiagoWasWaitingForMeToGetHerUpAsHeHadWokenUpAt4
#IShouldHaveJustGotUpAndDoneTheShootThenGotHerUpButSheIsWithTiagoNowWhileIDoSomeWork
#YesterdayTiagoTookHerToTheSupermarketByHimselfForTheFirstTime
#IUsuallyJoinToGetOltOfTheHouseWithHerButItMadeSenseForThemToGoAlone
#ItWasAlsoTheFirstTimeThatTheyHadBeenAloneInTheCarWhichIsWeirdAsSheIs11MonthsOld
#TiagoSaidHeEnjoyedPushingHerAroundAndTalkingToHer
#IThinkABigMistakeWeMadeWasNotGettingAPushchairWhereSheCanFaceUsButOhWell
#IAmRecoveringAlrightAfterHavingAToothOut
#IHaveBeenSuperTiredButMaybeItIsDownToNotExercisingSoMuch
#IHaveNotReallyExercisedInAFewWeeksAndMyOutdoorClassHasOnlyHappenedOnceDueToBadWeather
#PortugalHasBeenOnTheNewsALotWhenTalkingAboutSummerHolidays
#WhatHappensHappensAndWeWillJustHaveToSee
#IsItWeirdThatBIsNearlyAYearOldAndIStillFindItWeirdThatIHaveAKidAtTimes
#YesterdayIFellDownAnInternetHoleAndWasReadingAThreadAboutPeopleRegrettingTheyHadKids
#IDoNotRegretThatWeHadBAndThoughIFindItWeirdThatIAmAMotherICanNotImagineMyLifeWithoutHerNow
#ItWasMainlyPeopleSayingHowTiredTheyAreAndIGetIt
#WeWouldLikeToHaveAnotherChildAtSomePointButIDoWorryAboutHavingLessTimeForMyOwnStuff
#TheFurtherThatBGetsAwayFromTheSuperDependentBabyPhaseTheLessIWantToGoBackThere
#NowSheIsFeedingHerselfQuiteWellWhenWeGiveHerFoodWhereItIsDoable
#AndSheSitsAndAmusesHerselfMoreWhichIsNiceThoughIFeelBadIfSheDoesItForTooLong
#ButItGoodToBeAbleToMakeHerFoodWhileSheJustPlaysAndCrawlsAbout
#IWorryThatIAmABadEnoughMotherOfOneLetAloneAddingAnotherChildIntoTheMix
#IGuessWeWillJustSeeWhatHappensAndIfItHappensThenThingsWillNeedToChange
#InACoupleOfDaysMoreThingsWillReopenSoItWillBeGoodToExploreSomeDifferentPlaces
#IThinkTheWeatherIsMeantToBeQuiteRubbishForTheRestOfTheMonth
#IDefinitelyNeedToGetBetterAtEntertainingBIndoorsAtHome

#ICanNotBelieveThatBIsNearlyAYearOld

It probably has felt like a lot more than 11 months at times. It’s weird thinking back to how different she was 11 months ago…

#WhatAWeirdYearItHasBeen

I know I say it a lot, but I do wonder how things would be now if there hadn’t been a pandemic but there is no point thinking about it too much. It’s just been a very odd year.

#ITookThisPhotoAsSoonAsIGotOutOfBed

I was going for a ‘I’m very tired’ vibe.

#IProbablyShouldHaveTakenItHalfAnHourEarlierButIWasWaitingForTiagoToGetBUpAsSheWasMakingNoise

There was a lot of us looking at the clock then putting our heads back down.

#AndTiagoWasWaitingForMeToGetHerUpAsHeHadWokenUpAt4

He usually gets her up and I was going to offer, but I wanted to do this shoot and I had got in into my head that I was going to do it today – so I did not want to wait for tomorrow.

#IShouldHaveJustGotUpAndDoneTheShootThenGotHerUpButSheIsWithTiagoNowWhileIDoSomeWork

This would have made sense, but it’s 7:45am and I’ve done my hashtags and I’m doing this blog. I want to get it done so I can tackle the rest of my to do list. I seem to work best in the morning as I know Tiago will not want to do work now, and I keep working until I start to faff.

#YesterdayTiagoTookHerToTheSupermarketByHimselfForTheFirstTime

It doesn’t sound like a big deal, but it seemed like it (for me anyways).

#IUsuallyJoinToGetOutOfTheHouseWithHerButItMadeSenseForThemToGoAlone

I think supermarkets still don’t like more people going than necessary, and it made it different for Tiago.

#ItWasAlsoTheFirstTimeThatTheyHadBeenAloneInTheCarWhichIsWeirdAsSheIs11MonthsOld

I felt bad not being there to amuse B – we need to get one of those mirrors so B and T can see each other easily. I was more worried that she would fall asleep on the way home and then not go to bed easily. She keeps waking up half an hour after she’s gone to bed. Not sure what that is about.

#TiagoSaidHeEnjoyedPushingHerAroundAndTalkingToHer

I think the supermarket is good stimulation for B too with all the things to look at.

#IThinkABigMistakeWeMadeWasNotGettingAPushchairWhereSheCanFaceUsButOhWell

I think she is used to looking out when I push her around but it is hard to talk to her like that. That’s what you get for not being able to try out pushchairs during a pandemic…

#IAmRecoveringAlrightAfterHavingAToothOut

I can’t help but mess with the gap a lot. It feels massive.

#IHaveBeenSuperTiredButMaybeItIsDownToNotExercisingSoMuch

It is probably from a combination of many things – mothering Monday to Friday, trying to get lots of other stuff done when I can, recovering from having a tooth out and not exercising enough.

#IHaveNotReallyExercisedInAFewWeeksAndMyOutdoorClassHasOnlyHappenedOnceDueToBadWeather

My enthusiasm for the class is gone, so I don’t think I’ll be going back. I will stretch after I finish this post though – I can feel my back starting to ache.

#PortugalHasBeenOnTheNewsALotWhenTalkingAboutSummerHolidays

I think from Monday the doors will be open to Brits, but it can change and change again a million times before we go.

#WhatHappensHappensAndWeWillJustHaveToSee

Tiago says there is no point stressing about it. We’ll just have to prepare as best as we can and see what happens.

#IsItWeirdThatBIsNearlyAYearOldAndIStillFindItWeirdThatIHaveAKidAtTimes

It’s getting less weird, but it is bizarre.

#YesterdayIFellDownAnInternetHoleAndWasReadingAThreadAboutPeopleRegrettingTheyHadKids

Great. I haven’t been on Reddit in ages, and I won’t be going there again as I should have napped but instead I got sucked in to that thread and one about ruined weddings, and people who quit their jobs on the first day. Super productive stuff I know.

#IDoNotRegretThatWeHadBAndThoughIFindItWeirdThatIAmAMotherICanNotImagineMyLifeWithoutHerNow

It is weird thinking of life before her.

(5th July 2021: I said the same thing to Tiago yesterday.)

#ItWasMainlyPeopleSayingHowTiredTheyAreAndIGetIt

It is tiring, but it is rewarding. I don’t want to wish time away, but I am looking forward to her being older too.

#WeWouldLikeToHaveAnotherChildAtSomePointButIDoWorryAboutHavingLessTimeForMyOwnStuff

I think I’d just have to accept that I may not be able to do as much for a couple of years or so. I’m sure I’d find a way to do something though.

#TheFurtherThatBGetsAwayFromTheSuperDependentBabyPhaseTheLessIWantToGoBackThere

There was a 3 week old baby at B’s class the other day and it was weird thinking that B used to be that size. It’s amazing how much they change in a year. The early early days where they sleep 5 times a day isn’t so bad, and I hope that breastfeeding would be easier but looking after two kids must be a lot more tiring.

#NowSheIsFeedingHerselfQuiteWellWhenWeGiveHerFoodWhereItIsDoable

I need to look at more meals where she can feed herself, but we have a lot of frozen meals where you need a spoon really and B isn’t getting the hang of that yet.

#AndSheSitsAndAmusesHerselfMoreWhichIsNiceThoughIFeelBadIfSheDoesItForTooLong

She is obsessed with balloons at the moment. I am reading to her more which is nice.

#ButItGoodToBeAbleToMakeHerFoodWhileSheJustPlaysAndCrawlsAbout

Once or twice a week I make muffins and I usually do them in the morning when I am tired. We are all fans of those muffins – I usually put 3 blueberries on top though.

#IWorryThatIAmABadEnoughMotherOfOneLetAloneAddingAnotherChildIntoTheMix

I am just doing my best and I guess that is all I can do.

#IGuessWeWillJustSeeWhatHappensAndIfItHappensThenThingsWillNeedToChange

Let’s see.

#InACoupleOfDaysMoreThingsWillReopenSoItWillBeGoodToExploreSomeDifferentPlaces

Indoor play places! It will be good for B, and good for me. I hope that we’ll meet some more people too.

#IThinkTheWeatherIsMeantToBeQuiteRubbishForTheRestOfTheMonth

Great.

#IDefinitelyNeedToGetBetterAtEntertainingBIndoorsAtHome

The TV is on way too much for my liking, but I do like Bluey a lot. With better weather and more things reopening we can get out more which will make me feel better and B will probably enjoy it too so let’s see.


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Categories
Oh Me, Oh Mãe

Imitating B Standing Up In Her Cot (17th April 2021)

Imitating B Standing Up In Her Cot (17th April 2021)
 
#ThisSeemsToBeANewSkillThatBHasDevelopedInTheLastFewDays
#ThisMorningTiagoWentToGetHerAndSaidThatSheWasStandingUpInIt
#AtTimesSheGripsSoTightToTheFrameThatHerHandsLoseTheirColour
#IAmSoRelievedThatItIsTheWeekend
#TheWeekdaysJustSeemToDragSoMuchAndByThursdayIAmUsuallyNotFeelingSoGreat
#IWasGladWeGoToGoToAClassThisWeekButThenIJustFeltRubbishAfterwards
#ItWasSoNiceToSitInARoomWithPeopleAndBabiesAndToInteract
#SoEverydaySinceHasJustFeltCrummyAsIWantTheSameExperienceEveryWeekday
#NextWeekWeHaveAFewMoreThingsInOurDiarySoHopefullyItWillBeNicer
#SomeDaysITakeBOutTwiceADayJustToTryToHaveSomeKindOfInteractionWithSomeone
#ItSoundsDumbAsObviouslyWeLiveWithMyNanAndTiagoButSometimesTiagoIsOutOrIDoNotWantToBotherHim
#AlsoAFewMinutesIsNotTheSameAsHangingOutWithSomeoneForAPeriodOfTime
#IFeelBadAsIFeelLonelyWhenISpendAllDayWithB
#SheIsGoodCompanyButItIsNotTheSameAsHavingConversationsWithPeople
#IWorrySheWillReadThisWhenSheIsOlderAndFeelBad
#BILoveYouButThisPandemicHasBeenToughAndThingsAreNotHowIThoughtTheyWouldBe
#IFeelLikePeopleCanSmellTheDesperationOnMeAndAgainMySocialSkillsAreRubbish
#ICanNotBeTheOnlyOneInTheAreaThatFeelsLikeThisThough
#IWouldSignBUpForAClassEverydayButALotClashWithBsNaps
#ICouldTryToRearrangeHerDayButItFeelsLikeABitTooMuch
#EspeciallyAsIDoLikeTheScheduleWeHaveAndIAmUsedToIt
#SoIProbablyShouldNotWhineThenButIAmABitStuckInMyWays
#AtSomePointSheWillGoDownToOneNapADayAndThenThatWillChangeTheDayALot
#ThoughForNowINeedHerToHaveHerTwoNapsSoICanGetThingsDone
#YesterdayIWasSoTiredThatIJustGotIntoBedAndReadAndNappedDuringThem
#MyBodyGetsToAPointWhereItIsSoTiredThatIJustNeedToRestAndRecover
#IThinkTheTirednessIsOftenCausedByMyMentalStateButIfThereIsNothingPressingToDoThenARestIsFine
#AnywaysINeedToStopWhiningAndTryToBeProactiveToMakeTheWeekdaysBetter
#IStillDreadMealtimesABitThoughSheIsEatingWellTheseDays
#HopefullyWithBetterWeatherOnTheWayWeCanJustSitOutsideMoreAndThatWillBeEnoughOfAChangeToMakeTheDaysPassBetter
 

#ThisSeemsToBeANewSkillThatBHasDevelopedInTheLastFewDays

I just walked into her room one day and was surprised to see her doing it. It might have been yesterday, it might have been 2 days ago. I can’t remember, but I do remember thinking yesterday that I should imitate it.

#ThisMorningTiagoWentToGetHerAndSaidThatSheWasStandingUpInIt

So it was the first time he’d seen it.

#AtTimesSheGripsSoTightToTheFrameThatHerHandsLoseTheirColour

Her fingers go white with tiny bits of red.

#IAmSoRelievedThatItIsTheWeekend

It’s been a couple of hours since I wrote these hashtags and I already feel much better – I finished a yoga session (I stopped as I felt in the mood to write these hashtags), I did a shoot, I did 4 dance videos, I edited the dance videos, had breakfast, had a quick shower and now I’m writing these at 10.10am.

(17th May – And then I was super tired. I think I often try to do too much on Saturday mornings when Tiago is around to look after B, and I pay for it later. This Saturday I had to have a long nap in the afternoon.)

#TheWeekdaysJustSeemToDragSoMuchAndByThursdayIAmUsuallyNotFeelingSoGreat

This project is all about trying to be as honest as possible about my motherhood journey. I feel like I’m honest but not as honest as I could be. I am not looking for pity or sympathy or whatever, I just want to say how I am finding things.

#IWasGladWeGoToGoToAClassThisWeekButThenIJustFeltRubbishAfterwards

Some normality (whatever that means) and then back to how it’s been for months.

#ItWasSoNiceToSitInARoomWithPeopleAndBabiesAndToInteract

Like I said in my last post, it was so nice to see B smiling at everyone. Yesterday my Uncles surprised us with a visit and B was crying at them, so I think she doesn’t like people suddenly turning up on her home turf. Well, they were already in the garden but she’d just got up from a nap.

#SoEverydaySinceHasJustFeltCrummyAsIWantTheSameExperienceEveryWeekday

I’ve been looking forward to going to a class for so long, but then yeah the rest of the week just felt like going back to old times.

#NextWeekWeHaveAFewMoreThingsInOurDiarySoHopefullyItWillBeNicer

Our diary is a bit busier next week, so fingers crossed.

#SomeDaysITakeBOutTwiceADayJustToTryToHaveSomeKindOfInteractionWithSomeone

Take B to the swings. See if there is anyone to talk to. And repeat. The other day some small kids were talking to us.

One asked why she did not have shoes.

Me: Because she doesn’t need them yet as she can’t walk. She does have two pairs of socks on though.

Her: Two pairs of socks? That’s a bit greedy!

I told Tiago and he said ‘how do young kids have such a good sense of humour already?’

#ItSoundsDumbAsObviouslyWeLiveWithMyNanAndTiagoButSometimesTiagoIsOutOrIDoNotWantToBotherHim

I can feel quite alone during the weekdays. It’s nice to live with my Nan and we’re grateful to her for letting us live with her, but I do not always see her much in the day either.

#AlsoAFewMinutesIsNotTheSameAsHangingOutWithSomeoneForAPeriodOfTime

I feel bad for bothering Tiago so I try to just wait until he comes out of his ‘office’. His lunch never feels long enough.

#IFeelBadAsIFeelLonelyWhenISpendAllDayWithB

This feels a bit sh*tty to say.

#SheIsGoodCompanyButItIsNotTheSameAsHavingConversationsWithPeople

If she could talk it would be so much different. I still feel like I do not talk to her enough. I wish she could talk. She does babble a lot more now, but it’s not proper conversation.

#IWorrySheWillReadThisWhenSheIsOlderAndFeelBad

I do worry what she will think about all of this when she is older.

#BILoveYouButThisPandemicHasBeenToughAndThingsAreNotHowIThoughtTheyWouldBe

I do love you B. I’m so glad that you exist, but it’s been tough.

And I feel like people read this and think like I act like I’m the only person who has found the pandemic/lockdowns tough. Of course I know I’m not the only one. I think everyone has found it tough in one way or another. This is just my diary of sorts and so I say what I feel.

#IFeelLikePeopleCanSmellTheDesperationOnMeAndAgainMySocialSkillsAreRubbish

I was reading something the other day about just act like you’re the popular kid. If you act like the awkward, anxious person you are then it’s a self fulfilling prophecy. I’d feel like a fake trying to be the popular kid, but I just need to be me and stop caring so much.

#ICanNotBeTheOnlyOneInTheAreaThatFeelsLikeThisThough

I think I said that I posted in our local group about wanting to meet more people. The problem is most people are free to meet up at the weekend, which is fine, but I want more weekday friends. Weekdays are the problem!

#IWouldSignBUpForAClassEverydayButALotClashWithBsNaps

I look most days to see if there are any new ones. I’m going to try out an outdoor exercise class next week if the weather is good, as T can put B to bed and I can still have some time afterwards to do anything that I need to do. I think it will be good for me.

#ICouldTryToRearrangeHerDayButItFeelsLikeABitTooMuch

She is generally getting up around 6.45am now. I don’t want to get her up earlier in able to go to classes. Nah. If she was waking up at 6am every morning still then fair enough, I’d adapt her schedule for classes.

#EspeciallyAsIDoLikeTheScheduleWeHaveAndIAmUsedToIt

It seems to serve us well, except for classes that she naps through.

#SoIProbablyShouldNotWhineThenButIAmABitStuckInMyWays

If you understand then you understand, if you don’t then I don’t know.

#AtSomePointSheWillGoDownToOneNapADayAndThenThatWillChangeTheDayALot

I am hoping that isn’t for a few more months at least.

#ThoughForNowINeedHerToHaveHerTwoNapsSoICanGetThingsDone

Nap in the morning to try to get stuff done, nap in the afternoon to get minor stuff done or have a nap if there is nothing urgent to do. Or if her first nap is rubbish like yesterday, then we just deal with it and try to get more stuff done in the second nap.

#YesterdayIWasSoTiredThatIJustGotIntoBedAndReadAndNappedDuringThem

I haven’t been reading much lately, so I’m trying to get back into it.

I finished reading Life Below Stairs: True Lives of Edwardian Servants by Alison Maloney. It was a short read, but it still took me ages.

Then I started to read The Magician’s Nephew by C.S. Lewis last night. I need an escape of sorts, and I’ve never read all the Narnia books. I know they’re not really for adults, but why not. I’ve just seen that this was published 6th, but my library says it is the first in the series. I was wondering why I had never heard of it before. Oh well.

#MyBodyGetsToAPointWhereItIsSoTiredThatIJustNeedToRestAndRecover

I used to get this before having a baby, so with a 10 month old that I look after all week no wonder I’m due for a period of this.

#IThinkTheTirednessIsOftenCausedByMyMentalStateButIfThereIsNothingPressingToDoThenARestIsFine

I need to look after myself.

Someone just slammed a door downstairs and B seems to have woken up. Great. I’m ready for a nap… I wanted to just lie in bed and rest more this morning but I thought I should get up and start doing my work. I feel less guilty for doing work on weekend mornings as I think that Tiago does not like to start his weekends with work.

#AnywaysINeedToStopWhiningAndTryToBeProactiveToMakeTheWeekdaysBetter

Try to go to more classes/hang out in the park. Try to meet people no matter how awkward it is. Go to a class by myself. Be more positive. Be grateful that I have a small human to look after.

#IStillDreadMealtimesABitThoughSheIsEatingWellTheseDays

I am trying to encourage her to feed herself more these days. It seems to be working.

#HopefullyWithBetterWeatherOnTheWayWeCanJustSitOutsideMoreAndThatWillBeEnoughOfAChangeToMakeTheDaysPassBetter

I say this every post but fingers crossed.

B has gone back to sleep. Phew. I would have a lie down now, but our bedsheets are in the wash so I’m just going to try to do a few more things – post dance videos, edit/backup the shoot, and look at some work work that I need to do.


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Categories
Oh Me, Oh Mãe

Trying To Imitate How B Looks After She Has Slept On Her Hands (31st January 2021)

Self-portrait with some marks on my face from where I tried to imitate my daughter by lying on my hands.
Trying To Imitate How B Looks After She Has Slept On Her Hands (31st January 2021)
 
#BHasSuddenlyGotMoreMobile
#YesterdaySheStartedToRollOntoHerFrontThenBackOntoHerBack
#SheHasDoneItABitBeforeButMoreOnAccident
#NowSheKnowsWhatSheIsDoingAndUsesItToGetAroundMore
#SheWasAlsoCrawlingBackwardsABit
#YouCanSeeThatSheKnowsWhatSheNeedsToDoToCrawlForward
#ButItIsProbablyTheCarpetThatIsStoppingHerSomewhatRightNow
#IDoNotThinkItWillBeLongBeforeSheIsCrawling
#GoodbyeToTheDaysWhereYouCanPutHerDownAndLeaveTheRoomFor5SecondsToGetSomethingAndExpectToFindHerInTheSameArea
#WeAreStartingToBabyproofTheLivingRoomWithTowels
#ThisMorningSheWasAlsoBlowingALotOfRaspberries
#ItIsFunnySeeingHerOnTheBabyMonitorNow
#IAmGladWeDidNotHaveOneBeforeAsYouCanQuiteObsessedWatchingItAndSeeingEveryMovement
#ItIsCuteSeeingBFallAsleepOnHerSideAsIfSheWasTooTiredToEvenRollOntoHerFrontToSleep
#ButWhenSheDoesSleepOnHerFrontSheAlwaysSleepsOnHerHandsAndHasBigMarksWhereHerFingersWere
#SheHasNotLearnedTheArtOfTurningHerHeadToTheSideToSleepOnHerFrontYet
#IWillTryToRecreateTheFingerMarksOnMyHeadForThePhotoButLetsSeeHowLongIHaveToLieOnMyFrontFor
#SheSeemsToPreferSleepingOnHerFrontForNapsAndThenOnHerBackForNight
#ThoughTheOtherNightSheWasOnHerFrontAtNightAndIThoughtOhEventuallyWeWillHaveToGoInToTurnHerOverWhenSheScreams
#ButAtSomePointSheObviouslyRolledOntoHerBackAndItWasFine
#IAmStartingToFeelALittleDrainedAgain
#IHaveNotMadeMuchOfAnEffortToTalkToLocalPeopleLately
#ThoughTypicallyIFeelLikeThisAndThenPeopleStartToTalkToUsAtThePlaygroundMore
#IGuessIFeelLikeIHaveEnoughPeopleToTalkToThatICanNotSeeDueToCovid
#IAlsoHaveLessFreeTimeTheseDaysAndIDoNotFeelTheNeedToMakeLocalFriendsAsMuch
#ThoughThisWillProbablyChangeSoonWhenTheWeatherGetsBetterAndWeCanHopefullySpendMoreTimeOutdoors
#WeDoBabyClassesOnZoomWhereAtLeastBGetsToSeeSomeOtherBabies
#EspeciallyAsThereIsAlwaysABitWhereWeDanceTheBabiesUpToOurCamerasWhichIsRidiculouslyCute
#IFeelLikeIAmGettingQuiteObsessedWithBsScheduleAgainAndIAmQuiteUsedToOurDailyLife
#IGuessInNonPandemicTimesIWouldHaveGotUsedToAlteringItForThingsLikeClassesAndPlaydatesButIFeelLikeICanNotReallySwayAwayFromThingsRightNow

#BHasSuddenlyGotMoreMobile #YesterdaySheStartedToRollOntoHerFrontThenBackOntoHerBack #SheHasDoneItABitBeforeButMoreOnAccident #NowSheKnowsWhatSheIsDoingAndUsesItToGetAroundMore #SheWasAlsoCrawlingBackwardsABit #YouCanSeeThatSheKnowsWhatSheNeedsToDoToCrawlForward #ButItIsProbablyTheCarpetThatIsStoppingHerSomewhatRightNow #IDoNotThinkItWillBeLongBeforeSheIsCrawling

I do not usually bunch so many hashtags together, but this all fits together quite well.

It’s like a switch suddenly got flicked in her brain and she’s now hyperactive.

This morning after breakfast you could see that she just wanted to get back on the floor to try things out.

#GoodbyeToTheDaysWhereYouCanPutHerDownAndLeaveTheRoomFor5SecondsToGetSomethingAndExpectToFindHerInTheSameArea

I will miss them, but I am also excited to see B moving about.

#WeAreStartingToBabyproofTheLivingRoomWithTowels

I did an online first aid class and they were saying that a rolled up towel is good for some things – there’s a fireplace with bricks around it, which now has a big towel over the ledge.

#ThisMorningSheWasAlsoBlowingALotOfRaspberries

She was just blowing them in Tiago’s face. I did laugh… She also likes to blow raspberries more when she eats too.

#ItIsFunnySeeingHerOnTheBabyMonitorNow #IAmGladWeDidNotHaveOneBeforeAsYouCanQuiteObsessedWatchingItAndSeeingEveryMovement

Every arm flap makes me feel concerned. ‘Oh, she is going to wake up! No she didn’t…’ I turn it off unless I need it on – I’m far away/she cries and I want to see what is happening.

#ItIsCuteSeeingBFallAsleepOnHerSideAsIfSheWasTooTiredToEvenRollOntoHerFrontToSleep

Very cute.

#ButWhenSheDoesSleepOnHerFrontSheAlwaysSleepsOnHerHandsAndHasBigMarksWhereHerFingersWere #SheHasNotLearnedTheArtOfTurningHerHeadToTheSideToSleepOnHerFrontYet #IWillTryToRecreateTheFingerMarksOnMyHeadForThePhotoButLetsSeeHowLongIHaveToLieOnMyFrontFor

I was going to do this for the last shoot, but I felt like I could not justify lying on my front for a while. Today it is Sunday and I’ve done my ‘work work’ for the week so I am less stressed. I need to set up the camera before I lie down though as it might fade quick. Will I fall asleep? I might listen to a podcast or something.

B was up at 6 so she might sleep for another hour and a half now (it is 9.30am), but knowing my luck she will be awake in 10 minutes.

#SheSeemsToPreferSleepingOnHerFrontForNapsAndThenOnHerBackForNight #ThoughTheOtherNightSheWasOnHerFrontAtNightAndIThoughtOhEventuallyWeWillHaveToGoInToTurnHerOverWhenSheScreams #ButAtSomePointSheObviouslyRolledOntoHerBackAndItWasFine

Great. Though last night she was screaming as she was on her front and we did turn her over. Maybe we should have left her, but it had been 5 minutes. She was probably tired from all of her moving around last night.

She does seem to move around the cot quite a lot now.

#IAmStartingToFeelALittleDrainedAgain

I kept rewriting this half of the hashtags as I felt like I wasn’t explaining myself well.

#IHaveNotMadeMuchOfAnEffortToTalkToLocalPeopleLately #ThoughTypicallyIFeelLikeThisAndThenPeopleStartToTalkToUsAtThePlaygroundMore

I was using a lot of apps and things before, but now I just do not have the energy. The other day I was lost in my own thoughts while pushing B on a swing and someone started to chat to me. The next day someone else spoke to us.

#IGuessIFeelLikeIHaveEnoughPeopleToTalkToThatICanNotSeeDueToCovid

I have not seen a lot of my friends in over a year… (I know this is the case for a lot of people to.)

#IAlsoHaveLessFreeTimeTheseDaysAndIDoNotFeelTheNeedToMakeLocalFriendsAsMuch

At the moment it feels like the best thing to do is to stay away from people. Also having to start over with people from square one is always awkward. People who have known me for a while know me and what I do and I do not have to explain things which is great.

It’s the whole starting over from the beginning with people that is tiring, and then they usually do not talk to you for a while/long time/ever again for whatever reason. I do not have the energy for it right now.

#ThoughThisWillProbablyChangeSoonWhenTheWeatherGetsBetterAndWeCanHopefullySpendMoreTimeOutdoors

Oh yeah when we can go out as many times as we want and can just sit on the grass it will be great. At the moment when B naps I get things done. When she’s awake we have many hours to pass, so just chilling outside with people talking about things and letting the babies play sounds awesome.

#WeDoBabyClassesOnZoomWhereAtLeastBGetsToSeeSomeOtherBabies #EspeciallyAsThereIsAlwaysABitWhereWeDanceTheBabiesUpToOurCamerasWhichIsRidiculouslyCute

Last week I did not do as many as I planned. I think we managed 3 out of 5 days? I do wish they had them at the weekend as it’s a good way to pass time. I do do YouTube classes with her, but it’s not the same as watching other babies on the screen.

#IFeelLikeIAmGettingQuiteObsessedWithBsScheduleAgainAndIAmQuiteUsedToOurDailyLife #IGuessInNonPandemicTimesIWouldHaveGotUsedToAlteringItForThingsLikeClassesAndPlaydatesButIFeelLikeICanNotReallySwayAwayFromThingsRightNow

Going out to classes was stressful, but I did feel good when I had organised things well. Now I worry about B falling asleep on the way to or from classes when she shouldn’t, but it didn’t really do much damage anyways. I guess it will be a while until we have classes in real life again, and by then I’ll know more what I am doing with B’s schedule.

Yesterday she had a big breakfast and a tiny lunch. I think this morning it was quite a big breakfast, so I will push back lunch a bit. Things like this help with scheduling her day, and B eats well enough now that she can eat when we are out and about.

Boring stuff, but it’s what I think about.

Time to lie on the floor for a shoot…

(I did not have to lie on my hands for as long as I thought I would have to to get results, but my hands are bony and it did hurt. B’s hands are a lot more fleshy. It just looks like I’ve had sunglasses on for too long or something… Fail.)


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