Categories
Pregnancy Waiting II

Portrait Of A Mother Of A Fourteen Month Old (15 Weeks / 13th August 2021)

Self-portrait of myself yawning with my eyes partially closed due the yawning. I am resting the index finger of my left hand near my left eye.
Portrait Of A Mother Of A Fourteen Month Old (15 Weeks / 13th August 2021)
 
#IShouldBePackingButInsteadIAmProcrastinatingAndDoingAShootThatIWasNotGoingToDoToday
#ItMakesSenseToGetItDoneThoughAsIWantItToHaveTheSameLookAsOtherPortraitsOfAMotherOfEtc
#HopefullyTomorrowWeWillBeGoingAwayAndIWillHaveToDoWithoutMyLightingKitForNearly3Weeks
#IHadLookedAtGettingSomethingThatWouldSuitButIAmNotEarningMuchAtTheMomentSoItFeltQuiteFrivolous
#AnywaysYesterdayWeWentToBirminghamAirportToDoOurFitToFlyPCRTests
#WeWentForTheDriveThroughOptionWhichWasGoodAsBSleptTheWholeTimeEvenWhenALoudPlaneTookOff
#IWarnedTheWomanThatIAmJustGettingOverMyMorningSicknessButItWasFineAndLessUncomfortableThanWhenIDoAFlowTestMyself
#IJustStartedToWinceOnTheLastFewSecondsOfTheTenSecondsNostrilTwisting
#WeAreDueToGetOurResultsByTenTonightThoughTheySaidItMayTake48HoursFromTheTestWhichIsTomorrowMorning
#ByThatPointWeWillBePackedAndHeadingToLondonSoIReallyHopeTheTestsAreNegative
#IFeltALotMoreHappyAndRelaxedOnceTheTestsWereDoneAsThatWasABigStressToOrganiseAndAtThisPointThereIsNotMuchWeCanDoApartFromWaitForTheResults
#ThoughIFeltLessRelaxedOnceIRealisedThatWeWillBeTestedOnArrivalTooSoWeHaveToHopeWeDoNotPickItUpBetweenTests
#ItShouldBeFineExceptForYesterdayIChattedToALotOfPeopleInThePark
#ISawACoupleWhoWeSeeAllTheTimeAndChattedToThemForTheFirstTimeWhichWasNiceButTypicallyItIsJustAsWeAreGoingAway
#AndThenISpokeToAWomanWithADogWhoWeAlsoSeeAllTheTimeButHaveNeverSpokenMuchTo
#BWasAtFirstYellingOrFrustratedlyTalkingToHerDogAndThenSheWasYellingAtASquirrel
#IHaveNoticedThatSheTalksToAllAnimalsApartFromGeeseWhichIsFairEnoughAsTheyAreScary
#TheWomanCameByAndISaidThatBOnlyLikesToTalkToAnimalsAndThenWeSpokeForAges
#AndThenWeSawAnotherWomanWithADogWhoWeUsuallySeeAboutOnceAMonthNowButByThatPointBWasFedUpAndGotScaredByHerDogBarking
#BLikesToStareALotNowAndTheOtherDayATeenagerYelledAtHerSayingWhatAreYouStaringAt
#IThinkHimYellingJustMadeBStareMoreAndHisFriendSaidToHimWhatAreYouDoingWhichIsGood
#BWokeUpAt6ThisMorningThoughMeAndTiagoWereAwakeAtHerUsualTimeAndWorryingIfSheWasAliveAsSheWasSoQuiet
#IDoNotKnowWhySheSleptLateAsInTheParkSheWasEitherInTheSwingOrHerPushchairButMaybeTheBiryaniSheHadForDinnerFilledHerUpOrSheJustWasNotTeethingAt5ForOnce
#LastNightIWokeUpAndBoltedAcrossTheRoomAsInMyDreamBWasAboutToFallOffTheKitchenCounter
#BMakesMeLaughAsYesterdayNanWasPickingCrumbsUpOffTheFloorWhileBSatNextToHerPlayingWithTheVelcroOnNansShoes
#IHaveMyMidwifeAppointmentTodayAtLunchSoHopefullyThatWillAllGoOkay
#WeirdlyTheMidwifeAndIThoughtWeRecognisedEachOtherButIDoNotThinkWeHaveEverMetBefore
#SheWasAlsoLovelyAndIsAboutAWeekMorePregnantThanMeWhichIsCoolButAlsoAnnoyingAsIWantHerAsMyMidwife
#AtMyLastAppointmentTheySaidTheyMayOrMayNotListenForAHeartbeatAsItIsUsuallyTooEarly
#ButSheTriedAndItWasReassuringToHearItAndSheSaidIfIEverWantToCheckItToJustSendHerAMessage

#IShouldBePackingButInsteadIAmProcrastinatingAndDoingAShootThatIWasNotGoingToDoToday

I just realised that the reminders I write to myself were stacking up, and if I do this today then I can chill about doing work for a little bit.

#ItMakesSenseToGetItDoneThoughAsIWantItToHaveTheSameLookAsOtherPortraitsOfAMotherOfEtc

And this. I had debated just doing a shoot today then writing another day.

#HopefullyTomorrowWeWillBeGoingAwayAndIWillHaveToDoWithoutMyLightingKitForNearly3Weeks

I’m sure I’ll manage, it just ruins the look of the project a little bit but oh well. It might mix it up in a good way…

#IHadLookedAtGettingSomethingThatWouldSuitButIAmNotEarningMuchAtTheMomentSoItFeltQuiteFrivolous

And researching/reading reviews takes up so much time.

#AnywaysYesterdayWeWentToBirminghamAirportToDoOurFitToFlyPCRTests

We had looked at other options, but they’d sold out. I think I mentioned it in my last entry/post (I still don’t know what to call these).

#WeWentForTheDriveThroughOptionWhichWasGoodAsBSleptTheWholeTimeEvenWhenALoudPlaneTookOff

Having to park and go through a walk in felt like more hassle. Especially as we did not know what time B would wake up in the morning (5:15am for the record) and if we would disturb her napping (she fell asleep before we got to the airport).

She did briefly open her eyes just after we started to move again, she sleepily smiled at me then went back to sleep. When we got home she stayed in the car for an hour continuing to nap…

#IWarnedTheWomanThatIAmJustGettingOverMyMorningSicknessButItWasFineAndLessUncomfortableThanWhenIDoAFlowTestMyself #IJustStartedToWinceOnTheLastFewSecondsOfTheTenSecondsNostrilTwisting

I thought that I had better warn her in case I made some weird noises or something. She said she would go slow and I could take a break whenever I wanted but it was fine. I was glad that I got a woman, but it seemed like policy which was good (Tiago got a guy).

#WeAreDueToGetOurResultsByTenTonightThoughTheySaidItMayTake48HoursFromTheTestWhichIsTomorrowMorning #ByThatPointWeWillBePackedAndHeadingToLondonSoIReallyHopeTheTestsAreNegative

It is so stressful. I don’t see why people are bothering to go abroad to places where you need to test loads if you are just going for a week and not visiting family… I need to look at booking day 2 and day 8 tests for when I get back. Tiago only needs to do day 2, and B doesn’t need to do them. Phew.

#IFeltALotMoreHappyAndRelaxedOnceTheTestsWereDoneAsThatWasABigStressToOrganiseAndAtThisPointThereIsNotMuchWeCanDoApartFromWaitForTheResults #ThoughIFeltLessRelaxedOnceIRealisedThatWeWillBeTestedOnArrivalTooSoWeHaveToHopeWeDoNotPickItUpBetweenTests

It’d be bloody typical…

#ItShouldBeFineExceptForYesterdayIChattedToALotOfPeopleInThePark

Typically I often go to the park and hope to talk to people and I talk to no one. Yesterday was our chattiest day in a longgg time, if ever.

#ISawACoupleWhoWeSeeAllTheTimeAndChattedToThemForTheFirstTimeWhichWasNiceButTypicallyItIsJustAsWeAreGoingAway

I think I have mentioned them before (I hope it doesn’t get to the point where they might read this blog and find it awkward – hello if so).

Their kid is the same age as B and we have seen them around since we moved here. It was nice to finally chat. We always say we should say hello to them, but after a while it feels like too late to say hello. I took B to the swings though and they were next to us, so I felt like I should ‘go for it’. They’re so nice, and we chatted for ages. B was getting restless, so I thought I should take her home for dinner and a run around.

#AndThenISpokeToAWomanWithADogWhoWeAlsoSeeAllTheTimeButHaveNeverSpokenMuchTo

Once I was sat with B on a picnic blanket and the dog just came and sat next to her randomly. We spoke briefly then, but that was monthsss ago I think.

#BWasAtFirstYellingOrFrustratedlyTalkingToHerDogAndThenSheWasYellingAtASquirrel

I feel bad as I keep saying she is yelling, but she is probably just talking loudly and gets frustrated as they never come closer to her and/or talk back…

#IHaveNoticedThatSheTalksToAllAnimalsApartFromGeeseWhichIsFairEnoughAsTheyAreScary

At first I put evil instead of scary, but thought I might offend geese lovers. They just get quite defensive and hiss a lot. My parents used to have geese and once one bit my foot (luckily I was wearing steel toe capped boots, but still). I have been weary of them since…

#TheWomanCameByAndISaidThatBOnlyLikesToTalkToAnimalsAndThenWeSpokeForAges

She was smiling and I was in a good mood from talking to the couple. We spoke about lots of things from when she gave birth husbands were not allowed in the hospital at all, to anti-vaxxers. She’s also lovely.

#AndThenWeSawAnotherWomanWithADogWhoWeUsuallySeeAboutOnceAMonthNowButByThatPointBWasFedUpAndGotScaredByHerDogBarking

Last time we saw them it was early in the morning. We caught them this time as they came out early and we were late from chatting to so many people. I had to pick B up as she was scared by his barking. He’s a very friendly dog though.

#BLikesToStareALotNowAndTheOtherDayATeenagerYelledAtHerSayingWhatAreYouStaringAt

I was pushing B across the grass and she was sat on the standing board just chilling and looking at the world. I saw her looking at them and I looked briefly and smiled at them.

#IThinkHimYellingJustMadeBStareMoreAndHisFriendSaidToHimWhatAreYouDoingWhichIsGood

Maybe he was yelling at me, but I doubt it as B was having a good long look. So awkward. Glad his friend told him off as he was probably just showing off, but it did make me feel uncomfortable. I just didn’t look or say anything. Then a guy commented that B was staring a lot, but he was being friendly and was with his kids.

#BWokeUpAt6ThisMorningThoughMeAndTiagoWereAwakeAtHerUsualTimeAndWorryingIfSheWasAliveAsSheWasSoQuiet

Yesterday she was trying to get my Nan’s salt shaker off her tall table and I think it may have hit her on the head, so I was keeping an eye on her because of that.

#IDoNotKnowWhySheSleptLateAsInTheParkSheWasEitherInTheSwingOrHerPushchairButMaybeTheBiryaniSheHadForDinnerFilledHerUpOrSheJustWasNotTeethingAt5ForOnce

She wasn’t running around a lot, unless it was from all the listening? Maybe dinner was filling (she didn’t eat any yoghurt before bed like she usually does), or maybe it was down to teething. She never seems to stop teething, so maybe it did for a little bit and so she slept better. Who knows?

#LastNightIWokeUpAndBoltedAcrossTheRoomAsInMyDreamBWasAboutToFallOffTheKitchenCounter

Lol. There is no kitchen counter in our room. Tiago just said ‘are you alright?’ as my urgency woke him up. Classic.

#BMakesMeLaughAsYesterdayNanWasPickingCrumbsUpOffTheFloorWhileBSatNextToHerPlayingWithTheVelcroOnNansShoes

She is funny. She must like the sound. Today she realised she could make a sound on the cupboard with her fingers.

#IHaveMyMidwifeAppointmentTodayAtLunchSoHopefullyThatWillAllGoOkay

I have left myself four hashtags to write about it. Fun times.

#WeirdlyTheMidwifeAndIThoughtWeRecognisedEachOtherButIDoNotThinkWeHaveEverMetBefore

I was thinking I recognised her (even with her mask on) and then she said that she thought she had met me before. I’ve only had a couple of appointments though and they weren’t with her. I’ve recently moved GP surgery and it is better as I will have more of my appointments there rather than random centres, and I like her.

#SheWasAlsoLovelyAndIsAboutAWeekMorePregnantThanMeWhichIsCoolButAlsoAnnoyingAsIWantHerAsMyMidwife

Happy for her, but it’s typical. She said from her 30 weeks she might have to just work from home due to shielding, but she said we’ll see what the rules are. In Liverpool, my midwife was due to take sick leave but then she didn’t – but in the end she wasn’t my midwife as I didn’t have a homebirth. My midwife today said I could have a homebirth if I wanted, but I said it’s probably not very polite as we live at my Nan’s place.

#AtMyLastAppointmentTheySaidTheyMayOrMayNotListenForAHeartbeatAsItIsUsuallyTooEarly #ButSheTriedAndItWasReassuringToHearItAndSheSaidIfIEverWantToCheckItToJustSendHerAMessage

I know in Liverpool they were a bit weird about it. I guess it freaks people out if they don’t hear it, but the midwife today said that if it’s not good news then you wouldn’t hear much at all. The baby was hiding behind my placenta, but she could hear it moving and my placenta was being noisy. She kept trying to get a clearer sound for me, but I said as long as she was happy that all was good then it was fine with me.

Some reassuring news before our possible holiday. Fingers crossed.

15 weeks pregnant with B comparison:

Self-portrait wearing a black and white stripy dress. I am looking at the camera and have my left thumb touching my lips, and the rest of my fingers closing my left eye.
Maternity Clothes (15 and a half weeks)
 
#SoMyFirstMaternityClothesHaveArrived
#IDidNotWantToCurseThingsByBuyingThemTooEarly
#ButIDefinitelyNeededNewBras
#IAmTryingOutTheClipsThatYouUseSoYouCanFeed
#ItIsStartingToGetEasier
#ButIDoNotWantToPracticeTooMuch
#InCaseIBreakThatFunctionBeforeIActuallyNeedThem
#IHaveStartedToEditMyProjectDownNowSoIDoNotHaveToDoItLaterOn
#IHaveToPickMyFavouriteImageFromAllThePreviousShoots
#AndThenIMightTryDrawingOnThem
#ToHelpWithMyAnxietyAndWorries
#IDoDefinitelyHaveABumpNow
#ThoughIThinkDuringTheDayMostOfItIsDueToFood
#IHaveStartedToDoYogaOrPilatesOrStretchingInTheMorningAndEveningNow
#IHaveGotIntoAGoodHabitOfDoingItInTheMorning
#ButTheLastCoupleOfDaysIHaveBeenDoingItInTheEveningTooAsIFeelLikeINeedIt
#AndIAmStartingToGetPelvicPainNow
#AtLeastISeemToHaveMoreEnergyTheseDays
#IStillFeelABitSickButIAmNotBeingSick
#TheClosestIGetToBeingSickAtTheMomentIsWheneverIBrushMyTeeth
#IHaveTriedAllDifferentToothpastesButMyBodyHatesIt
#ITryToThinkOfDoughnutsAndUnicorns
#ApparentlyInWeek16TheBabyWillBeTheSizeOfADoughnut
#SoIMightGetOneToCelebrateAsIHaveBeenThinkingAboutThemForWeeks
#WheneverIAmSomewhereThatSellsThemINeverWantThemThough
#ApartFromMaybeThoseVansThatSellDinkieDoughnutsOrWhateverTheyAreCalledTheseDays
#AnywaysThisIsMyFirstMaternityDress
#IHateShoppingButISawItAndLikedItWhichIsRareSoIThoughtIShouldGetIt
#IAmBoredOfPregnancyAdsNow
#IWantToSeeOtherThings
#AFewYearsAgoWhenIUsedToGetPregnancyTestAdsOnYouTubeIWasSurprisedThatAGuyInMyImprovClassGotAdvertsForTomatoSoup

Well, coincidentally I have my left hand touching my face and one eye closed.

I have been wearing this dress since B was born, and I have been wearing it a lot lately. I haven’t bought any maternity clothes this time, but I have been given a maternity jumper.

I ended up not wearing the clip bras much, and ended up wearing the ones that you just move the bra with your hands. I’ve been wearing them lately anyways as they’re so comfy.

I never ended up drawing on the pictures, but I have got a lot quicker at editing. I usually edit the shoot on the day of the shoot or the day after now.

I feel like I haven’t had any pelvic pain yet with this pregnancy, but I have been doing pregnancy stretches in the morning and evening since getting a positive test this time which I think has helped.

I tried to distract myself more this time than think about doughnuts and unicorns when I feel sick – the thought of doughnuts is making me hungry. There are some jam doughnuts in the kitchen actually, but I’m not a fan.

I feel like I haven’t had too many pregnancy ads this time, but I am also making an effort to not accept all cookies on sites anymore. I could eat a cookie or five.


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Categories
Pregnancy Waiting II

Imitating B Looking At The Ceiling (8 Weeks? / 23rd June 2021)

Self-portrait on the floor. My elbows and arms are supporting me and I'm looking up to the ceiling.
Failing At Imitating How B Looks At The Ceiling (8 Weeks? / 23rd June 2021)
 
#SometimesBLeansBackAtStaresAtTheCeilingWhileInHerHighchair
#AtOneOfHerBabyClassesSheWillJustLeanBackAndLookAtTimes
#ThoughThereIsADiscoBallHangingDownButIAmNotSureIfSheHasActuallyNoticedIt
#SheHasHerThirdToothComingThroughWhichIsHerFirstInHerTopGum
#SheIsGettingMoreConfidentWithTakingStepsAndItWillNotBeLongBeforeSheIsReallyWalking
#WeNeedToGetHerSomeProperShoes
#WeHaveResignedOurselvesToTheFactThatSheJustWakesUpAtFiveFortyEveryDayNow
#IOnlyNoticedTheOtherDayHowItIsSoLightSoLateAtNightButNowItWillStartToGoTheOtherWay
#IWonderWhenOrIfSheWillStartToSleepInABitLater
#IAttendedAnOnlineClassAboutFeedingToddlersSoIKnowABitMoreNowAboutWhatSheNeedsToEatAtEveryMeal
#CookingIsDifficultAtTheMomentAsIGenerallyFeelSickWhenDoingItButINeedToPullMyWeightMore
#IHaveStartedToBeSickMoreRegularlySinceMyLastEntry
#YesterdayIHadTheDentalHygienistAndIWasReallyWorriedThatIWouldBeSickAtMyAppointment
#IWasGettingReadyAndWasAboutToBrushMyTeethWhenIWasSick
#BetterThatItWasBeforeThanDuringButIWasWorriedThatISmelledOfSick
#IWasRelievedToWalkIntoTheAppointmentAndSeeItWasTwoWomen
#IFeltLessAwkwardAboutSayingSorryIShouldWarnYouButIHaveBadMorningSickness
#IHadThoughtAboutCancellingTheAppointmentButIReadThatDentalHygieneIsReallyImportantWhenYouArePregnant
#IFeelLikeIShouldBeMorePregnantThanEightWeeksByNowAndMaybeIAmOrMaybeIAmNot
#IAmYetToHearAnythingAboutAnAppointmentSoIJustHaveToWaitAndSee
#IHaveBeenGettingTheChillsALotLatelyWhichIDoNotRememberHavingWithB
#IResearchedAboutItAndApparentlyItIsCommonAsYourHormonesAreAllOverThePlace
#MyNanLikesToPutTheHeatingOnHighSoTheChangeInTemperatureProbablyDoesNotHelp
#WeHaveStartedToSeeMorePeopleLatelyWhichIsReallyNice
#AFriendCameToSpendTheDayAndItWasReliefAsTheWeekDaysAreSoLong
#WeWillSpendTheWeekendWithSomeFriendsAndTheirKidsThisWeekendSoIAmLookingForwardToThat
#ItIsWeirdHowBIsOneAndSheIsStillYetToMeetSoManyPeople
#IHopeThatSheWillMeetMorePeopleBeforeSheHasASiblingSoSheDoesNotHaveToShareTheAttentionButItIsWhatItIs
#IWasThinkingThisMorningThatItIsWeirdThatWeMayHaveAnotherChildInSevenMonthsTime
#IKnowIAmPregnantAndWhatThatMeansButIStillDoNotReallyEquateItWithUsBeingAFamilyOfFourYet

(30th August 2021: I failed as being pregnant I couldn’t completely replicate how she does it. It’s more leaning back from a seated position, but I thought I better be careful. It was a hot day, so I wore less than I originally intended to.)

#SometimesBLeansBackAtStaresAtTheCeilingWhileInHerHighchair

I made a note of this in my ‘pictures to take’ memo 3 weeks ago.

#AtOneOfHerBabyClassesSheWillJustLeanBackAndLookAtTimes

She did it at the last class.

#ThoughThereIsADiscoBallHangingDownButIAmNotSureIfSheHasActuallyNoticedIt

I like to try to see what she is looking at. At my Nan’s house she does have some nice patterns in the paint on the ceiling, but I guess she is just taking in all of her environment.

#SheHasHerThirdToothComingThroughWhichIsHerFirstInHerTopGum

I thought I saw something a few days ago but thought it was just saliva, but then I realised the day after that it was the start of a tooth.

#SheIsGettingMoreConfidentWithTakingStepsAndItWillNotBeLongBeforeSheIsReallyWalking

I wrote the hashtags while B played with her toys, which is the first time I’ve wrote and she’s played. As I was thinking what to write B walked from the table to an activity table that my Nan got for her.

#WeNeedToGetHerSomeProperShoes

We have some shoes, but I can not even get them on her feet. Last time I did they cut her heel a bit, so yeah she needs shoes. I need to find somewhere to get her measured…

#WeHaveResignedOurselvesToTheFactThatSheJustWakesUpAtFiveFortyEveryDayNow

The other night it was 11pm and I was struggling to sleep. I knew I would regret it, but actually yesterday I didn’t have a nap and felt okay. I went to nap during her first nap, but she woke up as soon as I pulled my eye mask on and lay my head down (I had been doing some work first).

I am writing this blog post while B is having a nap. I don’t feel particularly tired, but I will at least lie down and have a rest.

#IOnlyNoticedTheOtherDayHowItIsSoLightSoLateAtNightButNowItWillStartToGoTheOtherWay

It was the 20th June and I was like ‘ooh it’s 10pm and it’s still light! Oh yeah tomorrow is the longest day of the year…’

#IWonderWhenOrIfSheWillStartToSleepInABitLater

I think we have to keep acting like she will never sleep in late again so we don’t go to bed too late. At the moment T and I are having a nice chat before we go to sleep, which sounds basic but we didn’t have time for it for a while. It’s important.

#IAttendedAnOnlineClassAboutFeedingToddlersSoIKnowABitMoreNowAboutWhatSheNeedsToEatAtEveryMeal

Carbs at every meal/snack. More energy dense foods. Okay.

#CookingIsDifficultAtTheMomentAsIGenerallyFeelSickWhenDoingItButINeedToPullMyWeightMore

I managed to make a mushroom and leek pie while B crawled around me yesterday. Though T helped with the puff pastry, but it felt good to contribute as I have been so rubbish lately.

#IHaveStartedToBeSickMoreRegularlySinceMyLastEntry

I was sick after finishing my last post.

#YesterdayIHadTheDentalHygienistAndIWasReallyWorriedThatIWouldBeSickAtMyAppointment

I was really anxious about it.

#IWasGettingReadyAndWasAboutToBrushMyTeethWhenIWasSick

I was a bit relieved.

#BetterThatItWasBeforeThanDuringButIWasWorriedThatISmelledOfSick

I arrived just on time, though someone beat me to reception so it seemed like I was late. I had been trying to make sure I didn’t smell of sick.

#IWasRelievedToWalkIntoTheAppointmentAndSeeItWasTwoWomen #IFeltLessAwkwardAboutSayingSorryIShouldWarnYouButIHaveBadMorningSickness

If there had been two guys I would have said it, but I would have felt more awkward for sure.

#IHadThoughtAboutCancellingTheAppointmentButIReadThatDentalHygieneIsReallyImportantWhenYouArePregnant

Your gums bleed more, which might be why when I went to have a tooth out my gums might have been bleeding a lot when they were checking me over beforehand. I had that tooth removed as ibruprofen was the only thing that helped and I knew that you’re not really supposed to take ibruprofen when you’re pregnant. I didn’t want the pain to get worse and then have a tooth out when I was possibly heavily pregnant. It was a good job that I had it out when I did.

#IFeelLikeIShouldBeMorePregnantThanEightWeeksByNowAndMaybeIAmOrMaybeIAmNot

Time moves in weird ways. Sometimes I look quite pregnant, but it’s more of a food baby I think.

#IAmYetToHearAnythingAboutAnAppointmentSoIJustHaveToWaitAndSee

I did miss a call from a mobile number last week. They never left a message though so it probably was just spam.

#IHaveBeenGettingTheChillsALotLatelyWhichIDoNotRememberHavingWithB

I’ll go really cold. Put my jacket on. Then I’m hot in a few minutes.

#IResearchedAboutItAndApparentlyItIsCommonAsYourHormonesAreAllOverThePlace

Great.

#MyNanLikesToPutTheHeatingOnHighSoTheChangeInTemperatureProbablyDoesNotHelp

Heating on maximum. Turn it down. Sun comes out. Etc etc.

#WeHaveStartedToSeeMorePeopleLatelyWhichIsReallyNice

After so long without seeing many people at all.

#AFriendCameToSpendTheDayAndItWasReliefAsTheWeekDaysAreSoLong

It was so nice to hang out and have someone else giving B attention. We all had a nap when B had her second nap. I was glad that she didn’t mind me going off to sleep and she said she fell asleep too.

#WeWillSpendTheWeekendWithSomeFriendsAndTheirKidsThisWeekendSoIAmLookingForwardToThat

We went away with them a few years ago and we were the only couple who did not have kids. There were 4 kids then and now there are 7. If this pregnancy goes well then we will all have 2 kids each.

#ItIsWeirdHowBIsOneAndSheIsStillYetToMeetSoManyPeople

*Shrug* What can we do?

#IHopeThatSheWillMeetMorePeopleBeforeSheHasASiblingSoSheDoesNotHaveToShareTheAttentionButItIsWhatItIs

I know a lot of people will not see me until I potentially have two kids and that might be weird for them to see. I keep saying potentially as I am still nervous about things as it is early days. Morning sickness is meant to be a good sign, but it is never concrete.

#IWasThinkingThisMorningThatItIsWeirdThatWeMayHaveAnotherChildInSevenMonthsTime #IKnowIAmPregnantAndWhatThatMeansButIStillDoNotReallyEquateItWithUsBeingAFamilyOfFourYet

I guess things will be more real when we have a scan or an appointment. At the moment I am finding it hard to get my head around, I think so much of my time is focused on B that in ways I probably do not think about it all as much as when I was pregnant with her.

Fingers crossed for it all. Time to have a lie down. I’m feeling sleepier now…

8 weeks pregnant with B comparison:

Self-portrait. Sat in bed with the bedsheet and duvet pulled up around me, and holding my hands to my elbows. I'm looking straight at the camera and look a bit tired.
I Worry That People Will Think I Am Drunk Or Hungover If I Am Sick In The Street (8 Weeks)

#8Weeks
#ThatMeansIHaveKnownForNearly4WeeksNow
#ItIsSoWeird
#IThinkIAmGettingALittleLessFreakedOutNow
#ThoughCrampsAndStuffOccasionallyDoMakeMeWinceAndWorry
#ThenIRememberHowOftenIHaveExperiencedThem
#TheSicknessThingIsAlreadyGettingOld
#IHaveBeenFeelingMoreSickInTheEvenings
#IDoNotMindBeingSickInTheMorningSoMuchAsIHaveNotEatenYetAndNowIJustTryToDrinkWaterBeforeEightThirty
#OnceIAmSickInTheMorningIFeelFineAndNowItIsBecomingWeirdlyReassuring
#LikeOkayIMustStillBePregnantAsMyBodyIsDoingThatSickThing
#IJustDoNotWantToGetCaughtOutAndBeSickOutsideOfOurFlat
#IWorryThatPeopleWillThinkIAmDrunkOrHungoverIfIAmSickInTheStreet
#BeingSickOnATrainIsMyMainWorry
#IBoughtSomeProperSickBagsYesterday
#ButINeedToJustCarryOneAroundWithMe
#LikeAReallyCoolKid
#RegisteredForTheDentistToday
#TheyWereLikeDoYouPay
#ISaidIUsuallyDoButIAmPregnantAtTheMoment
#AtTheMomentSeemsToBeSomethingThatISayALot
#IAmStillCautious
#IToldOneMorePersonThisWeekThatIAmPregnant
#BecauseIFeltSoSickAndWeWereGoingToMeetTiagoAndHisFriendAndIThoughtTiagosFriendWouldSayCongratsWhenHeSawMeWhichHeDid
#IUnderstandTheNotTellingLotsOfPeopleButIfItIsToProtectMeThenItIsMoreAwkwardNotTalkingAboutThingsThanTalkingAboutThem
#AwkwardAsInKeepingSecretsAndKeepingThoughtsBackFromPeople
#TalkingToPeopleSayingThatIAmMakingWorkAboutTryingToGetPregnant
#WhichIWasDoingButNowIAmPregnantSoICanNotBeTrueAboutWhatIAmWorkingOnAtTheMoment
#IAmSeeingSomeFriendsNextWeekSoIAmGuessingIWillTellThemThenAsOtherwiseIMightNotSeeThemFaceToFaceAgainForAWhileAndSeeingPeoplesReactionsIsMostOfTheFun 
#WhenWeWereEngagedIOnlyToldPeopleFaceToFaceBeforeWeActuallyGotMarried

I am 8 weeks pregnant in the new image, though it hadn’t been confirmed yet. Cramps still make me worry. With B I was usually sick more in the mornings, but with baby X I was sick more in the evenings. I was never actually sick in public with B, but I was sick in front of people last week, which wasn’t very nice…

This time I wasn’t really travelling about because of B and Covid (I’ve only been on a train two or three times for short journeys since she was born), so I’ve hopefully missed that phase this time.

I also told more people via messages that I was pregnant this time before I announced it as I knew I would not see many people in person before hand.

But morning sickness is and was HORRIBLE. Some things don’t change…


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Categories
Oh Me, Oh Mãe

I Need To Stop Whining And Get Over Myself (7th April 2021)

I Need To Stop Whining And Get Over Myself (7th April 2021)
 
#AfterIHadWrittenMyHashtagsAndDoneMyShootTheOtherDayBSuddenlyStartedToBabbleLoads
#SheSaysDadaQuiteClearlyThoughWeNeverReallySaidItToHerBeforeAsWeCallTiagoHerPaiMoreThanHerDad
#ItIsObviouslyJustASoundThatBabiesCanMakeQuiteEasily
#TiagoWasTellingBThatIAmHerBigDadaAndThatHeIsTheLittleDada
#SheHasPhasesWhereSheBabblesLoadsAndThenSheWillNotSayAnythingForAWhile
#WeAreStillGettingUsedToHearingHerBabblingButItIsReallyCute
#ICanStillNotImagineHavingProperConversationsWithHerOneDay
#ButItIsLikeSheHasAlwaysBeenCrawlingNowSoIAmSureItWillBecomeNormalFast
#WeHadSomeTiramisuAtTheWeekendAndIFeltQuiteTipsyAfterwardsAsIHaveNotHadADrinkForAWhile
#SometimesIThinkAboutHavingADrinkButThenIUsuallyHaveLotsOfStuffToDoSoIDoNotBother
#IAmStillFeelingABitWeirdAboutHavingQuitMyJob
#IDoNotLikeToQuitThingsButIThinkItWasTheRightDecision
#IWasSoTiredOnMondayThatIDoNotSeeHowIWouldHaveManagedToDoAShiftAnyways
#MyBossCameToPickUpMyThingsYesterdayAndIDidNotEvenSeeHimSinceHeSaidICouldJustLeaveItByTheFrontDoor
#IFeltSoRubbishAtTheJobAsIWasSoAnxiousAboutKnockingOnPeoplesDoors
#ItHasAffectedMyConfidenceABitButHopefullyIWillGetOverItAllSoon
#IDefinitelyFeltABitRunDownPerhapsAsMyBodyWasLikeOkayYouCanRelaxNowThatThatIsOver
#IHadSomeCovidTestsLeftOverFromMyJobSoITookOneJustInCaseButItWasNegative
#IDoNotFindThemThatUncomfortableThoughTheyDoMakeMeGagAndSneeze
#BHasABabyClassNextWeekWhichIAmExcitedForButAlsoAnxiousAbout
#IAmWorriedAboutHowSheWillReactToItAllButIAmSureSheWillBeFine
#MyYoungerSisterCameToVisitUsAndBCriedAtHerForAWhile
#ByTheTimeSheLeftThoughBWasABitObsessedWithHerSoItJustShowsThatSheNeedsALittleTimeToAdapt
#IAmMostWorriedAboutBTryingToCrawlAwayWhenWeProbablyNeedToStayFirmlyOnOurMat
#ButIAmSureSheWillJustEnjoySittingAndLookingAtOtherPeople
#YesterdayOnTheSwingsSheWasJustStaringAtEveryoneAgain
#IFeelSoAwkwardAsObviouslyWeAreTaughtThatItIsNotPoliteToStare
#IAmSurePeopleDoNotMindAsTheyKnowSheIsJustABabyButStill
#SometimesItIsAGoodWayToMakeConversationButSometimesItDoesNotHappen
#IDidAShootWithBAndIThinkWeBothExperiencedEveryKindOfEmotionDuringIt

Well, this has never happened before – I managed to not post this and not realise this for two posts. Good work!

#AfterIHadWrittenMyHashtagsAndDoneMyShootTheOtherDayBSuddenlyStartedToBabbleLoads

I feel like she used to be quite ‘talkative’ when she was younger and then she went quieter. It was a bit of a shock to hear her babbling with quite clear sounds.

#SheSaysDadaQuiteClearlyThoughWeNeverReallySaidItToHerBeforeAsWeCallTiagoHerPaiMoreThanHerDad

Pai is Dad in Portuguese.

#ItIsObviouslyJustASoundThatBabiesCanMakeQuiteEasily

Maybe that’s where Dad came from?

‘Dada? That can be your name for me but it sounds a bit babyish so what about Dad?’

#TiagoWasTellingBThatIAmHerBigDadaAndThatHeIsTheLittleDada

Lol. I wonder when she will say Mama though.

#SheHasPhasesWhereSheBabblesLoadsAndThenSheWillNotSayAnythingForAWhile

She likes to babble to the stepladder in the kitchen, and last night she was talking to the bin a lot?

#WeAreStillGettingUsedToHearingHerBabblingButItIsReallyCute

I wonder what her voice will sound like when she’s older, and what accent she’ll have?

#ICanStillNotImagineHavingProperConversationsWithHerOneDay

It’s a weird thought, but I’m looking forward to it. It’s weird spending so much of my time with someone who doesn’t talk back to me…

#ButItIsLikeSheHasAlwaysBeenCrawlingNowSoIAmSureItWillBecomeNormalFast

It’s probably only been a month and a half? I can’t even remember now. It’s like she’s always done it.

#WeHadSomeTiramisuAtTheWeekendAndIFeltQuiteTipsyAfterwardsAsIHaveNotHadADrinkForAWhile

Absolute lightweight.

#SometimesIThinkAboutHavingADrinkButThenIUsuallyHaveLotsOfStuffToDoSoIDoNotBother

I didn’t have time for after effects of alcohol before having a baby, and I definitely do not have time for it now.

#IAmStillFeelingABitWeirdAboutHavingQuitMyJob

Ergh.

#IDoNotLikeToQuitThingsButIThinkItWasTheRightDecision

Oh definitely.

#IWasSoTiredOnMondayThatIDoNotSeeHowIWouldHaveManagedToDoAShiftAnyways

I guess I would have just got on with it, but my body felt so heavy then and it feels heavy now.

#MyBossCameToPickUpMyThingsYesterdayAndIDidNotEvenSeeHimSinceHeSaidICouldJustLeaveItByTheFrontDoor

I put it out early as I knew I had to get B ready for a nap around the time he said he’d drop by. I checked a couple of minutes later before I had even started to get B ready and it was already gone.

I was worried it had been stolen, but he never rang/texted/knocked so I’m sure it’s fine.

#IFeltSoRubbishAtTheJobAsIWasSoAnxiousAboutKnockingOnPeoplesDoors

It’s not great when you’re balancing everything to do a job that you feel so rubbish at and anxious about.

#ItHasAffectedMyConfidenceABitButHopefullyIWillGetOverItAllSoon

I need to focus and get over myself as I need to find other work now. Why do I have to be so awkward?

#IDefinitelyFeltABitRunDownPerhapsAsMyBodyWasLikeOkayYouCanRelaxNowThatThatIsOver

Yesterday I just napped/rested when B did.

#IHadSomeCovidTestsLeftOverFromMyJobSoITookOneJustInCaseButItWasNegative

I just felt a bit unwell, but I think it’s just how I feel in the morning when I get up sometimes. I took the test just in case, and I soon felt better anyways.

#IDoNotFindThemThatUncomfortableThoughTheyDoMakeMeGagAndSneeze

Fun times. I think soon everyone in the UK will be able to do tests twice a week, so maybe I’ll get used to them and they won’t take so long due to all the sneezing. It’s like sticking a little duster up my nose…

#BHasABabyClassNextWeekWhichIAmExcitedForButAlsoAnxiousAbout

I CAN NOT BELIEVE THAT IT IS NEARLY TIME TO GO.

#IAmWorriedAboutHowSheWillReactToItAllButIAmSureSheWillBeFine

It has been 4ish months since her last in person class.

#MyYoungerSisterCameToVisitUsAndBCriedAtHerForAWhile

‘Who is this strange woman in my territory?’

#ByTheTimeSheLeftThoughBWasABitObsessedWithHerSoItJustShowsThatSheNeedsALittleTimeToAdapt

I was really surprised that she cried as we do see her for walks from time to time, but I guess it has been a few weeks since we last saw her.

#IAmMostWorriedAboutBTryingToCrawlAwayWhenWeProbablyNeedToStayFirmlyOnOurMat

I’m sure she won’t be the only little escape artist. It’s going to be weird, but hopefully fun. I need to pack a going out bag for B. I haven’t had to do that for a long time…

#ButIAmSureSheWillJustEnjoySittingAndLookingAtOtherPeople

I am hoping she loves seeing lots of people her own age.

#YesterdayOnTheSwingsSheWasJustStaringAtEveryoneAgain

I’ve probably talked about it before; she does just stare at everyone at the playground.

#IFeelSoAwkwardAsObviouslyWeAreTaughtThatItIsNotPoliteToStare #IAmSurePeopleDoNotMindAsTheyKnowSheIsJustABabyButStill

Some people react well, some people are a little awkward. I don’t blame them.

#SometimesItIsAGoodWayToMakeConversationButSometimesItDoesNotHappen

‘Yes B, there are other people in the world.’ ‘Sorry, she’s not used to seeing other people.’ ‘Yeah, she’s a proper lockdown baby.’

#IDidAShootWithBAndIThinkWeBothExperiencedEveryKindOfEmotionDuringIt

Happy, sad, annoyed, frustrated – you name it we both went there.


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