Categories
Pregnancy Waiting II

Portrait Of A Mother Of A Fifteen Month Old (20 Weeks / 16th September 2021)

Self-portrait in B's tent. I'm leaning on my elbows in the doorway with my fingers pushing in my cheeks.
Portrait Of A Mother Of A Fifteen Month Old (20 Weeks / 16th September 2021)
 
#AfterALotOfLaptopStressInTheLastWeekWithItChargingThenNotItIsNoMore
#SoIAmWritingThisFromTiagosWhereTheSKeyDoesNotWorkAndIHavePasteItInEveryTimeIWantIt
#ICanNotBelieveThatIAm20WeeksAlready
#LastNightIHadATerribleLegCrampForTheFirstTimeInAgesAndIThinkItWasDueToBeingDehydrated
#IWasSoTiredTheOtherDayThatILayDownForANapDuringHerSecondNapWhichIUsuallyDoButThenOversleptBy40Minutes
#LuckilyIPutBToBedJust10MinutesLaterThanUsualAndSheWokeUpAt7InTheMorning
#IAmTryingToMakeMyLifeEasierByLettingBCrawlInAndOutOfHerCotViaTheZippedEntrance
#SheHasDefinitelyChangedALotInTheLastWeekOrTwo
#SheHasStartedToSlideOutOfHerPushchairWhenIPutHerInItSoINowHaveToReclineItToBabyModeWhenItIsTimeToGo
#SheDoesNotComplainOnceSheIsBuckledInAtLeast
#BLovesHerNewShoesAndWandersAroundThePlaygroundInThemNow
#SheSeemsToWalkInThemWellAndHerNewFavouriteThingToDoIsJustShakeTheChainAtTheBottomOfAClimbingWall
#TheOtherDaySheKeptOpeningALittleDrawerInTheLivingRoomThatCouldFallOutAndHurtHer
#TAndIKeptSayingNoAndWhenISayNoSheLooksAtMeLikeIAmTheMeanestPersonOnThePlanet
#InTheEndWeTurnedItRoundAndWhenSheNoticedSheWasPuzzledFor5SecondsAndThenMovedOntoSomethingElse
#SheHasAPatchOfDrySkinOnTheBackOfHerNeckWhichWasWorryingMeButThenIRealisedItIsBecauseSheLikesToPutEverythingAroundHerNeck
#ItIsNotTheBestHabitForHerToHaveSoWeHaveToBeReallyCareful
#SheLikesToHoldThingsSoTheyTouchTheBackOfHerNeckRatherThanGoAllTheWayRoundAtLeast
#SheHasStartedToHelpHerselfToFruitFromTheFruitBowlAndYesterdayManagedToEatMostOfAnAppleThroughoutTheDay
#YouCanSeeThatSheHasAMouthfulOfTeethNowButTheAppleWasQuiteSoftWhichExplainsWhySheWasNotStruggling
#ThisLackOfSKeyIsReallyAnnoying
#BHasAlwaysLovedMusicButItShowsMoreLatelyWhenASongEndsAndSheMakesANoiseAsIfToSayWhyHasTheMusicStopped
#IAmWorriedAboutCovidAndThingsGettingBadAgain
#IFeelABitDividedAboutBoosterShotsAsItSeemsABitUnfairOnALotOfCountriesButIWillAlsoFeelMoreRelievedWhenNanGetsHers
#WeWentToBsToddlerClassAgainAndAtTheFirstOneIDidNotWearAMaskButIDidAtThisOne
#IKnowOnlyMeWearingAMaskDoesNotDoMuchGoodButIFeelSlightlyMoreProtected
#IDoNotWantBsClassesToGetCancelledAgainIfCasesIncreaseButPerhapsItWillBeEasierToAttendOnlineIfItIsAfterBabyXIsBorn
#SheKeptHerDistanceFromTheOtherKidsAndWasQuiteHappyStandingByHerselfWithAMaraca
#ItMustBeOverwhelmingForHerSuddenlyBeingAroundOlderKidsSoAsLongAsSheEnjoysHerselfIDoNotMind
#SheLovesToWatchTheOlderKidsInThePlaygroundSoMaybeSheJustNeedsABitMoreTimeBeforeSheJoinsIn

#AfteraLotOfLaptopStressInTheLastWeekWithItChargingThenNotItIsNoMore

It was struggling to charge, so I got a new charger and then that confirmed that it was my laptop that had the problem… A replacement will hopefully arrive in the next few days.

#SoIAmWritingThisFromTiagosWhereTheSKeyDoesNotWorkAndIHavePasteItInEveryTimeIWantIt

It makes for slow and frustrating work. Maybe it will be a shorter entry than normal.

#ICanNotBelieveThatIAm20WeeksAlready

I have my 20 week scan coming up. I am excited but nervous.

#LastNightIHadATerribleLegCrampForTheFirstTimeInAgesAndIThinkItWasDueToBeingDehydrated

I did feel really thirsty. It is so painful.

#IWasSoTiredTheOtherDayThatILayDownForANapDuringHerSecondNapWhichIUsuallyDoButThenOversleptBy40Minutes

I think my alarm had gone off but I was so disorientated that I went back to sleep and then woke up 40 minutes later and went ‘whoops’. The alarm clock in our room has weirdly disappeared while we were on holiday, but every one says they have not touched it. Weird.

#LuckilyIPutBToBedJust10MinutesLaterThanUsualAndSheWokeUpAt7InTheMorning

Phew. I did not want to put her to bed much later, and I was worried that she would wake up at 6 or something.

She has been making noises at 5 or 6 some days but she tends to go back to sleep until 6:45 or 7. Phew.

#IAmTryingToMakeMyLifeEasierByLettingBCrawlInAndOutOfHerCotViaTheZippedEntrance

I do not want to have to lift her up more times than necessary.

#SheHasDefinitelyChangedALotInTheLastWeekOrTwo

She seems more grown up or acts older at times.

#SheHasStartedToSlideOutOfHerPushchairWhenIPutHerInItSoINowHaveToReclineItToBabyModeWhenItIsTimeToGo

A bit of a tantrum. This seems to be the easiest way to deal with it, where we both do not get too stressed or annoyed.

#SheDoesNotComplainOnceSheIsBuckledInAtLeast

I think kids get distracted quite quickly.

#BLovesHerNewShoesAndWandersAroundThePlaygroundInThemNow #SheSeemsToWalkInThemWellAndHerNewFavouriteThingToDoIsJustShakeTheChainAtTheBottomOfAClimbingWall

Considering she had not worn shoes for three or more weeks she walk really well in them. she likes to play with the velcro too…

She likes to rattle the chain as it makes a loud noise. it is fine as long as long as no older kids are waiting to climb.

#TheOtherDaySheKeptOpeningALittleDrawerInTheLivingRoomThatCouldFallOutAndHurtHer #TAndIKeptSayingNoAndWhenISayNoSheLooksAtMeLikeIAmTheMeanestPersonOnThePlanet

The way her lip curls (I think that’s the right term?) and she looks at me. I only say no if she is doing something dangerous, so I do not feel too bad about it. She does not give T the same look though…

#InTheEndWeTurnedItRoundAndWhenSheNoticedSheWasPuzzledFor5SecondsAndThenMovedOntoSomethingElse

There is always something else for her to be meddling with…

#SheHasAPatchOfDrySkinOnTheBackOfHerNeckWhichWasWorryingMeButThenIRealisedItIsBecauseSheLikesToPutEverythingAroundHerNeck

Which likely explains it, so I have been putting cream on it whenever I remember.

#ItIsNotTheBestHabitForHerToHaveSoWeHaveToBeReallyCareful

We can not seem to stop her doing it.

#SheLikesToHoldThingsSoTheyTouchTheBackOfHerNeckRatherThanGoAllTheWayRoundAtLeast

I am worried that she might suffocate herself. I can see how it is easily done…

#SheHasStartedToHelpHerselfToFruitFromTheFruitBowlAndYesterdayManagedToEatMostOfAnAppleThroughoutTheDay

She took a bit out of it though and then was keen to bite all the other ones.

#YouCanSeeThatSheHasAMouthfulOfTeethNowButTheAppleWasQuiteSoftWhichExplainsWhySheWasNotStruggling

I was impressed but also worried that she was going to break all her teeth.

#ThisLackOfSKeyIsReallyAnnoying

–make s hashtag capital —

I am going to have to make all the capital s’ bigger when I post this. It is too much effort. (Going through this in mid-October I have had to capitalise so many s’.)

#BHasAlwaysLovedMusicButItShowsMoreLatelyWhenASongEndsAndSheMakesANoiseAsIfToSayWhyHasTheMusicStopped

We listen to a good mix of classic, and then Vicky Arlidge – her favourite nursery rhyme singer.

#IAmWorriedAboutCovidAndThingsGettingBadAgain

Oh, the C word appears again.

#IFeelABitDividedAboutBoosterShotsAsItSeemsaBitUnfairOnALotOfCountriesButIWillAlsoFeelMoreRelievedWhenNanGetsHers

It does seem unfair to be getting them already, but people like my Nan are starting to get more vulnerable again.

#WeWentToBsToddlerClassAgainAndAtTheFirstOneIDidNotWearaMaskButIDidAtThisOne

I decided to not wear one when I saw no one else was, but then I spent the whole class feeling uncomfortable. With this one, someone else walked in wearing one, but then took it off. I felt awkard being the only person wearing one – in case people thought I was ill or something. Oh well.

#IKnowOnlyMeWearingAMaskDoesNotDoMuchGoodButIFeelSlightlyMoreProtected

I am basically protecting everyone from me, but I’m not that protected from them. Fun time.

#IDoNotWantBsClassesToGetCancelledAgainIfCasesIncreaseButPerhapsItWillBeEasierToAttendOnlineIfItIsAfterBabyXIsBorn

It is what it is, and we will just have to deal with it. I am not looking forward to the winter.

#SheKeptHerDistanceFromTheOtherKidsAndWasQuiteHappyStandingByHerselfWithAMaraca

The other kids are mostly older and have lots of energy and can talk, and respond more.

#ItMustBeOverwhelmingForHerSuddenlyBeingAroundOlderKidsSoAsLongAsSheEnjoysHerselfIDoNotMind

It is her class, so she can do what she wants. she is not hurting anyone, so it is fine.

#SheLovesToWatchTheOlderKidsInThePlaygroundSoMaybeSheJustNeedsABitMoreTimeBeforeSheJoinsIn

She is just doing a lot of observing, so one day she might just start to do more things, and get more involved. We just need to wait and see.

20 weeks pregnant with B comparison:

Close-up of my belly button.
My Belly Button Has Never Been So Close (20 and a half weeks)
 
#IGuessItMustBeWeirderForPeopleWhoHaveInnies
#ItHasBeenMoreOutForAFewWeeks
#ButIAmStartingToThinkThatMaybeItHasAlwaysBeenLikeThis
#ButBecauseMyBellyIsGrowingThenItIsCloserToMe
#IFeelLikeItWasHarderToCleanBeforeThough
#InOtherNewsIHadMy20WeekScanToday
#WasRelievedToSeeAHeartbeatVeryQuickly
#ThoughTheScannerWasQuietALotWhichWorriedMe
#IGuessSheWasJustConcentratingOnCheckingThings
#AtOnePointWeCouldSeeItMovingItsMouthWhichWasFunny
#SheDidAllTheChecksApartFromThree
#SheAskedMeToGoToTheLooAndThenJumpUpAndDown
#TheBabyWasInABallAndWouldNotBudge
#SheHadMeRockingMyHipsFromSideToSide
#ItWouldNotMove
#SheMadeMeDrinkASugaryDrinkAndGoForAWalk
#ItWouldNotMove
#SheHadMeDoingStarjumps
#IWasImpressedWithHowManyIDidBut
#ItWouldNotMove
#SoIHaveToGoBackIn2To3Weeks
#IHopeEverythingIsOkay
#IStillHaveNotHadMyScreeningResultsFrom7PlusWeeksAgo
#IJustKeptLaughingAtTheMonitor
#WeHaveAPictureOfItLookingLikeAGrumpyOldMan
#WhenSheShowedUsItsFaceBeforeItLookedMoreLikeAPuppyThanABaby
#ThenSheShowedUsItsSpineSoMuchThatIComparedItToADinosaur
#SheGaveUsThePicturesForFreeAsSheSaidTheBabyWasInSuchABadPosition
#ICanDefinitelyFeelTheBabyMovingAroundNow
#ItTypicallyWasMovingBeforeAndAfterTheAppointment

It seemed quite pushed out from an early stage this time, but I didn’t document it as it was not so interesting to me this time.

My next post will talk about my 20 week scan for baby X. It was definitely a lot easier this time round, though I was sent out to go to the toilet (weirdly I wrote holiday) to see if it would help do the last few checks.


Thanks for reading! If you’re enjoying my blog (and/or the work I make) please consider supporting me by ‘buying me a coffee’ on Ko-fi – thanks!

Categories
Pregnancy Waiting II

Wedding Dress Malfunction (18 Weeks / 29th August 2021)

Self-portrait holding my cardigan strategically over a dress. My left hand is on my stomach, and my left hand is on my chest.
Wedding Dress Malfunction (18 Weeks / 29th August 2021)
 
#ItWasTheWeddingOfABestFriendOfTiagoWhichHadGotDelayedFromLastYearDueToCovid
#IWoreTheDressForOurWeddingAndEveryWeddingWeHaveBeenToSinceAndJustAssumedItWouldFitMeEvenWithABump
#IWentToPutItOnAndStruggledToDoUpTheButtonOnTheInsideSoTiagoHadToHelpMe
#IForgotThatIUsuallyHaveSomeStressWithThisDressDueToMyBraBeingExposedAtSomePointAndTheFrontFlappingOpen
#SoITriedToUseHairGripsWellAndEvenPinnedPartOfItToMyPantsButAsIAteItExposedEvenMore
#InTheEndIWoreMyBigCardiganThatShouldProbablyBeRetiredFromWeddingsNowAndHadItPulledTightlyAroundMeForMostOfTheDay
#ItWasBsFirstWeddingAndThereWereAbout150PeopleWhichHadBeenReducedFromAbout240
#WeEndedUpSittingAtTheBackOfTheCeremonyAndBKeptWanderingOutSoWeHadToKeepLeavingAndComingBack
#AfterBWasBornISaidIWouldWearMoreMakeupSoIBoughtSomeAndYesterdayWasTheFirstTimeIWoreSomeOfItAYearAfterIBoughtIt
#WeWereMeantToGoSomewhereToDoCovidTestsTheDayBeforeButTheRulesChangedSoWeWereJustToldPolitelyToDoFlowTestsWhichIWasAllFor
#ItFeltABitOverwhelmingBeingAroundSoManyPeopleButWeJustFollowedProtocolAndHadAGoodTimeInTheEnd
#WeThoughtWeWouldRelaxMoreAtTheReceptionButWhenYouBecomeAParentYouAlsoBecomeAHealthAndSafetyOfficer
#TiagoKeptTakingHerOutsideButThereWereALotOfRocksAWaterFeatureAndPalletsWithSplintersAndSheKeptRunningAroundSoWeWereBothQuiteTired
#IAmFindingItHarderToBendOverToFollowHerAboutAndItDidNotHelpHavingAMalfunctioningDress
#ITryToExplainToBAboutTheBabyGrowingInsideMeButSheJustPokesMyBellyButtonAndFindsItFunny
#TheOtherDaySheWasPullingMyTopUpJustToPokeIt
#WeWereNotSureHowLongToKeepBThereButInTheEndBAndIWentHomeAtNineThirtyAndTiagoWentBackUntilTwoThirty
#BSleptUntilSevenAndTiagosMumLookedAfterHerUntilHerNapAtTen
#TheOtherNightBSleptSoBadlyAndKeptWakingUpForAgesButItMayHaveBeenACombinationOfTeethingBeingColdAndOrALeap
#IAmNotVeryGoodWithThisSocialisingAfterBGoesToBedAsIAmSoTiredSoOftenTiagoWillDropMeHomeAndThenGoBack
#IWasWaitingToBookOurReturnCovidTestsInCaseThereWasSomeGoodNewsForUsAboutTheCovidTravelTrafficLightSystemWhichGetsUpdatedEveryThreeWeeks
#PortugalIsNotOnTheListButIWasSuperHappyToSeeTheAzoresOnTheList
#IThenWasFrustratedToLearnThatAsOurLayoverIsInLisbonDuringOurReturnTripTheGreenRulesWouldNotApplyToUs
#TheAirlineWeBookedThroughHadOfferedUsARefundOnBothOurFlightsThoughDueToTheLayoverTurningFromFourToNineHours
#LuckilyWeManagedToGetNewFlightsThatAvoidTheMainlandForTheSamePriceAndOurTravelTimeHasNowBeenReducedBySixHours
#WeWillStillGetHomeAt3InTheMorningButIWillNotHaveToQuarantineAndWeBothOnlyHaveToDoDay2TestsNow
#SoIAmNowGratefulThatTheAirlinesScrewedUsOverAndDidNotCareAboutItAsOtherwiseWeWouldHaveNotGotARefund
#ThisAlsoNowMeansThatICanGoToLondonForTheBigPhotographyWeekendOfTheYear
#TiagoKeepsSayingIShouldHaveADayForMyselfButIDidNotWantToWasteItOnSomethingUnworthy
#IAmGoingToGoFridayNightToSaturdayNightAndAmLookingForwardToSeeingLotsOfFriendsThoughIHaveNeverSpentMoreThanFiveHoursAwayFromBBefore

#ItWasTheWeddingOfABestFriendOfTiagoWhichHadGotDelayedFromLastYearDueToCovid

I was also unsure about all the travelling with a newborn, and not really wanting Tiago to leave me alone with B for a few days, so Covid made it easier for us – the wedding had to be postponed.

#IWoreTheDressForOurWeddingAndEveryWeddingWeHaveBeenToSinceAndJustAssumedItWouldFitMeEvenWithABump #IWentToPutItOnAndStruggledToDoUpTheButtonOnTheInsideSoTiagoHadToHelpMe

I should have tried it on before packing it… It was even awkward taking it off yesterday, but I guess I will have to try to get it on again to take a photo to accompany this post. (Spoiler: I managed it.)

#IForgotThatIUsuallyHaveSomeStressWithThisDressDueToMyBraBeingExposedAtSomePointAndTheFrontFlappingOpen

It’s been two years since I last wore it, so I forgot…

#SoITriedToUseHairGripsWellAndEvenPinnedPartOfItToMyPantsButAsIAteItExposedEvenMore

Pinning it to my pants definitely helped in ways, but then it also was probably shifting it round too. Yeah I felt awkward.

#InTheEndIWoreMyBigCardiganThatShouldProbablyBeRetiredFromWeddingsNowAndHadItPulledTightlyAroundMeForMostOfTheDay

The poor cardigan is looking a bit scruffy.

I am going to try to emulate my awkwardness in the photo.

#ItWasBsFirstWeddingAndThereWereAbout150PeopleWhichHadBeenReducedFromAbout240

Luckily she has got used to seeing other people now, and she was mostly interested in the slightly older kids that were wandering about.

#WeEndedUpSittingAtTheBackOfTheCeremonyAndBKeptWanderingOutSoWeHadToKeepLeavingAndComingBack

We were stressed about what she would wear, but in the end we put her in an all in one suit that went with the blue of our outfits. If you can’t wear unicorns and sunflowers to a wedding when you’re one, when can you?

B would not sit still, which is fair enough.

#AfterBWasBornISaidIWouldWearMoreMakeupSoIBoughtSomeAndYesterdayWasTheFirstTimeIWoreSomeOfItAYearAfterIBoughtIt

I thought I should maybe work on my appearance a bit as I always look so rough. I just wore mascara on my upper eyelashes (the bottom are a faff), and lipstick (I do not remember the last time I wore lipstick but it was nice). The lipstick probably wore off under my mask before anyone would have noticed it, but oh well.

#WeWereMeantToGoSomewhereToDoCovidTestsTheDayBeforeButTheRulesChangedSoWeWereJustToldPolitelyToDoFlowTestsWhichIWasAllFor

I was glad that everyone had to do a test, so when I heard the rules changed I did feel a bit uneasy.

There are only 19 active cases on the island, but only a few days ago there was no new cases and the risk was dropped to the lowest. 6 new cases have just been announced.

I hope that everyone did flow tests, but I doubt it.

#ItFeltABitOverwhelmingBeingAroundSoManyPeopleButWeJustFollowedProtocolAndHadAGoodTimeInTheEnd

For some reason we thought we wouldn’t need masks for the wedding and reception, which was dumb of us. We had to go back to our car to get one. We wore one when inside the church, when walking in, out and around the reception etc.

#WeThoughtWeWouldRelaxMoreAtTheReceptionButWhenYouBecomeAParentYouAlsoBecomeAHealthAndSafetyOfficer

Anything and everything is a potential hazard with a kid.

#TiagoKeptTakingHerOutsideButThereWereALotOfRocksAWaterFeatureAndPalletsWithSplintersAndSheKeptRunningAroundSoWeWereBothQuiteTired

At least it was mostly grass. We took trainers for her to wear but she was barefoot the whole time.

Tiago’s other best friend was there and he gets on well with B, so he looked after her a bit which gave us some rest.

#IAmFindingItHarderToBendOverToFollowHerAboutAndItDidNotHelpHavingAMalfunctioningDress

I’m not even halfway and I’m struggling…

#ITryToExplainToBAboutTheBabyGrowingInsideMeButSheJustPokesMyBellyButtonAndFindsItFunny

Not sure if I’ve mentioned B laughing at the picture of Tiago as a baby too. Maybe she’ll get the whole baby bump more as it grows bigger and she grows older.

#TheOtherDaySheWasPullingMyTopUpJustToPokeIt

Classic. Charming.

#WeWereNotSureHowLongToKeepBThereButInTheEndBAndIWentHomeAtNineThirtyAndTiagoWentBackUntilTwoThirty

We had had to wake her up early from her nap to get to the wedding on time, so she would have needed a super early bedtime. She stayed up 3 hours past her wake window… We changed her nappy and put her in her bedtime clothes before we left, so she fell asleep in the car and we moved her to the cot. Again, we forgot her toothbrush…

#BSleptUntilSevenAndTiagosMumLookedAfterHerUntilHerNapAtTen

I had expected B to wake up earlier (our alarm went off and it might have woken her up), and T’s Mum came in a minute after hearing her. I changed B’s nappy, then his Mum took over so we went back to sleep. That was a nice surprise. That was probably the longest sleep I’ve had since she was born.

#TheOtherNightBSleptSoBadlyAndKeptWakingUpForAgesButItMayHaveBeenACombinationOfTeethingBeingColdAndOrALeap

T had dropped me home from something then went back out. I think he might have woken her up, and then she just would not sleep. We gave her paracetamol, we left the room in case it was us, but in the end we put her in her sleeping bag (it has been quite hot until lately) and she went to sleep, so we have been dressing her up warmer at night recently.

#IAmNotVeryGoodWithThisSocialisingAfterBGoesToBedAsIAmSoTiredSoOftenTiagoWillDropMeHomeAndThenGoBack

I haven’t had a nap during the day for the last few days, which doesn’t help. They’re all his friends and my brain stops trying to translate after a while, so it makes sense for him to go back and not have to worry about me/upsetting his friends by leaving early.

#IWasWaitingToBookOurReturnCovidTestsInCaseThereWasSomeGoodNewsForUsAboutTheCovidTravelTrafficLightSystemWhichGetsUpdatedEveryThreeWeeks #PortugalIsNotOnTheListButIWasSuperHappyToSeeTheAzoresOnTheList

It hadn’t been a rumour in the news, but it makes sense as the cases are so low here.

#IThenWasFrustratedToLearnThatAsOurLayoverIsInLisbonDuringOurReturnTripTheGreenRulesWouldNotApplyToUs

There is only one direct flight a week to and from the main island. We had caught that one out, but as the return trip landed at 11pm we booked a different route home.

#TheAirlineWeBookedThroughHadOfferedUsARefundOnBothOurFlightsThoughDueToTheLayoverTurningFromFourToNineHours

We had booked that return home as it landed at a much better time (6pm-ish?), but then they changed it so we landed at 11pm.

#LuckilyWeManagedToGetNewFlightsThatAvoidTheMainlandForTheSamePriceAndOurTravelTimeHasNowBeenReducedBySixHours

We now have to be at the airport for mid-day rather than 6am, so that makes a big difference. Annoyingly our car is by Heathrow and not Stansted (we flew out of Stansted but left our car by Heathrow as we were due to return there).

#WeWillStillGetHomeAt3InTheMorningButIWillNotHaveToQuarantineAndWeBothOnlyHaveToDoDay2TestsNow

The money that we save on my day 8 test (Tiago didn’t need one as he is double vaccinated) will go on a taxi, but at least our return trip costs about the same now.

#SoIAmNowGratefulThatTheAirlinesScrewedUsOverAndDidNotCareAboutItAsOtherwiseWeWouldHaveNotGotARefund

Tiago went to the airport to see if we’d still be able to get a refund. The guy couldn’t do it, but said if they said they would then they would. We went ahead and booked our flights as we didn’t want the prices to go up.

Tiago emailed on Friday morning, and they emailed back on Saturday early afternoon saying we’d get a refund so we went to the wedding happy about that.

It worked in our favour in the end. Phew.

#ThisAlsoNowMeansThatICanGoToLondonForTheBigPhotographyWeekendOfTheYear

I was annoyed that I would be quarantining and would miss it.

(I write all this in hope that I don’t get Covid and have to self-isolate before the weekend).

I’m a bit nervous about going without being double vaccinated, but I’ll be careful.

#TiagoKeepsSayingIShouldHaveADayForMyselfButIDidNotWantToWasteItOnSomethingUnworthy

I feel bad leaving him to look after B for a day for something frivolous, but this is a good use of my ‘get out of parenting for a day’ card.

#IAmGoingToGoFridayNightToSaturdayNightAndAmLookingForwardToSeeingLotsOfFriendsThoughIHaveNeverSpentMoreThanFiveHoursAwayFromBBefore

T suggested that I go on Friday instead of Saturday so that I am less tired on the Saturday. I am not sure how much photography I will be able to see as my stamina for everything is low these days, but I’m looking forward to it. I haven’t been to London since November 2019, so it will be nice to see multiple friends at once and eat some of the food that I’ve been missing.

I’m definitely going to my favourite pizza place… (Spoiler: I didn’t go to my favourite pizza place.)

18 weeks pregnant with B comparison:

Self-portrait with my left hand pressing against my face.
There Is Only So Much Longer That I Can Hide My Bump In My Dance Videos (18 Weeks)
 
#IAmDefinitelyFeelingMorePregnant
#BumpIsDefinitelyGrowing
#IThinkARandomWomanWasStaringAtMyBumpTheOtherDayAtTheTrainStation
#MorePeopleKnowNowButIUsuallyJustTellPeopleInPerson
#OrIfTheyMessageMeAndIKnowIWillNotSeeThemUntilAfterIAnnounceIt
#AsThereIsOnlySoMuchLongerThatICanHideMyBumpWithAJumperInMyDanceVideos
#AndIWantToStartPostingThisProject
#InPersonIUsuallyTryToTellPeopleInAnUnexpectedWay
#LikeIDoNotSayIHaveSomethingToTellYouOrIHaveNews
#SomeoneAskedHowTiagoIsAndISaidHeIsExcitedToBeAFather
#SomeoneAskedIfTiagoWasMyHusbandTheOtherDayAndISaidYesAndMyBabyDaddy
#SomeoneAskedIfAnyoneWasIllAndISaidIAmPregnantIfThatCounts
#GenerallyPeopleAskingHowIAmIWillSayPregnant
#ThoughTheOtherDayIHadJustEatenAndISaidIHadBeenTellingEveryoneThatIAmPregnant
#SheLaughedAndThenAskedIfIWas
#IAmSeeingAFriendTomorrowAndIMightJustSeeIfSheNoticesMyBump
#SeeingTheLookOnPeoplesFacesIsHalfOfTheFun
#IfNotMostOfTheFun
#IAmHappyThatBrushingMyTeethHasBecomeLessOfATask
#ICanActuallyBrushMyTeethMultipleTimesADayWithLessWorryNow
#IHaveASoreThroatAtTheMoment
#SoIDidASaltGargleThisMorning
#IMadeItTooSaltyAsIWasThenSick
#IHaveBeenPhotographingMyselfEverytimeIHaveBeenSickWhilstPregnant
#ButIKnewThisWasMyOwnFaultSoIDidNot
#ThatWasACoupleOfHoursAgoAndMyStomachFeelsABitUneasyStill
#IHaveBeenUpSince5SomethingAsTiagoHadATrainToCatchAndIHaveFinallyGotIntoWatchingTheCircle
#IKnowIWillRegretItLater
#ParticularlyAsIHaveMyOwnTrainToCatchAndPlansForTonight
#AndIAmNotFeelingVeryWellSoIProbablyHaveMadeThingsWorseByNotGoingBackToSleep

This time I announced my pregnancy earlier so I did not have to worry about showing too much in the dance videos. I’m currently 25 weeks pregnant and no one has left a comment about me being pregnant yet, but then again no one really watches them anyways.

As I announced it earlier I didn’t really get to mess around with telling people much. The closest this time was seeing a friend with an older kid and a baby, and she said ‘don’t have a second one’ and I said ‘well I’m pregnant’.

I have had to do a salt water gargle a couple of times this pregnancy and I have tried to be careful.

I definitely don’t have the time or energy to watch TV so early or late.


Thanks for reading! If you’re enjoying my blog (and/or the work I make) please consider supporting me by ‘buying me a coffee’ on Ko-fi – thanks!

Categories
Pregnancy Waiting II

Imitating B In Her Temporary Cot (17 Weeks / 25th August 2021)

Self-portrait of my face pressed up against two bars of B's temporary cot.
Imitating B In Her Temporary Cot (17 Weeks / 25th August 2021)
 
#SheDoesSomethingSimilarInHerCotAtHomeButTheEffectIsQuiteDifferentAsThisIsBarsAndAtHomeItIsMesh
#EveryoneKeepsSayingHowMuchBLooksLikeTiagoButSheDefinitelyHasMyLoveOfWater
#SheHasBeenGettingUpsetWheneverWeTakeHerOutOfHerPoolOrOutOfTheSea
#HerLittleLipsWillBeShiveringAndSheWillWantToKeepGoingBackIn
#YesterdayWeTookHerToASpotThatHadARedAndYellowFlag
#WeTookItInTurnsSwimmingInTheYellowAreaAndOnlyLetBHaveALittleSplashWhenTheSeaCalmedDownMomentarily
#WeAreAdjustingToBeingHereButIFeelQuiteLostWithoutOurUsualRoutineAndStuff
#ThisHouseIsNotVeryBabyProofAndThisMorningIHadToRunDownTheCorridorInCaseBDecidedToGoToTheSteps
#TheOtherDayOurAlarmWentOffForTheFirstTimeInMonthsAndWeActuallyHadToWakeBUpForOnceAfterSeven
#ItSeemsLikeAOneOffThoughAsSheHasAtLeastThreeTeethComingThroughAndUsuallyWakesUpAt6SomethingNowWhichIsOkay
#MaybeItIsDueToHavingALaterDinnerOrMaybeItIsFromAllTheSplashingOrMaybeItIsAMixOfFactors
#IThinkWeWillTryPushingHerDinnerALittleLaterWhenWeGetHomeThoughAndGivingHerBiggerSnacks
#TheOtherDayIGotStungByALittleJellyfishWhichWasABitOfAShockButALifeguardPutSomeGelOnIt
#IManagedToSwallowSomeSeaWaterOnAnotherOccasionAndIEndedUpVomitingInMyHandAwkwardlyInFrontOfAFewPeople
#OurConnectingFlightOnTheWayBackHasBeenDelayedByFiveHours
#ThisMeansWeHaveANineHourLayoverAndWillProbablyGetHomeAtThreeInTheMorning
#TheAirlinesDoNotCareWhichIsDisappointingSoWeWillHaveToSeeWhatWeCanDoOtherwiseWeWillHaveToJustDealWithIt
#WeGotATimeAndDateForOur20WeekScanWhichIsAlsoInconvenientSoICalledAndSaidWhatDaysAreBestForUsAndTheyGivenUsAnotherInconvenientSlot
#SoTiagoWillProbablyHaveToWaitWithBInTheCarAndIWillHaveToGoInAloneWhichIsAnnoyingButWhatCanWeDo
#WeHaveTakenBToAMassiveDuckPondACoupleOfTimesWhichSheQuiteLikesAndILoveLookingAtAllTheDucklings
#ThereAreNoDucksLikeTheOnesAtHomeSoItIsNiceToSeeSomeDifferentBirds
#IHadNeverBeenThereBeforeButIGuessThatOurPrioritiesHaveChangedNowWithBAndWeWantToGoToMoreKidFriendlyPlaces
#WeHaveBeenGoingToALittleCoffeeShopForBreakfastAndYesterdayBManagedToKnockTiagosCoffeeAllOverMyBreakfastAndMe
#WhenWeWerePackingISaidIDidNotWantToBringManyClothesAsIEndUpWearingTheSameThreeOutfits
#InRealityIHaveBeenWearingTheSameDressAndJustWashingItAndPuttingItOnAgainAsSoonAsPossible
#WeHaveBeenRunningErrandsOrGoingToMeetFriendsWhileBSleepsAndTiagosMumKeepsAnEyeOnHer
#TheOtherNightWeWentToABarbequeAfterBHadGoneToBedButThenISpentTheWholeEveningSatByABabyAndAFourYearOldSoFeltBadForNotBringingHer
#MyPortugueseSpeakingHasImprovedButIStillFindItDifficultToUnderstandWhatPeopleAreSaying
#IGetSoTiredSoQuicklyInTheEveningsWhenWeGoOutWhichIsProbablyDueToUsingExtraBrainPowerTryingAndGenerallyFailingToTranslate
#ItIsNiceToSeePeopleButIHaveNotSocialisedThisMuchInAVeryLongTime

#SheDoesSomethingSimilarInHerCotAtHomeButTheEffectIsQuiteDifferentAsThisIsBarsAndAtHomeItIsMesh

It’s less of a full face smush, and more of a partial face smush?

#EveryoneKeepsSayingHowMuchBLooksLikeTiagoButSheDefinitelyHasMyLoveOfWater

Yes, she does look like him a lot. There’s a picture above her cot of Tiago as a baby and I keep pointing to it and saying ‘there’s daddy as a baby’ and she laughs.

Tiago likes the water, but he usually just likes to have a very short swim whereas I want to swim for ages. Well, I can’t anymore…

#SheHasBeenGettingUpsetWheneverWeTakeHerOutOfHerPoolOrOutOfTheSea

Similar vibes to when Tiago puts her back on the floor, when she wants to be in his arms all day.

#HerLittleLipsWillBeShiveringAndSheWillWantToKeepGoingBackIn

We try to not let her go in for more than fifteen minutes at a time.

#YesterdayWeTookHerToASpotThatHadARedAndYellowFlag

We saw the flags and were pretty gutted. Tiago went to talk to the lifeguards to see if it was safe enough to swim/take B in. There was a set of stairs that was safe to use, but we had to be careful as waves would wash over the wall and made it a bit dangerous.

#WeTookItInTurnsSwimmingInTheYellowAreaAndOnlyLetBHaveALittleSplashWhenTheSeaCalmedDownMomentarily

B was quite happy splashing in a little puddle on the rocks by the sea, but then after she’d had a bit of a splash in the sea she was annoyed again. She was getting quite jealous of me swimming in the sea. Better to be safe than sorry…

#WeAreAdjustingToBeingHereButIFeelQuiteLostWithoutOurUsualRoutineAndStuff

Today Tiago is out all day running errands, and I’m not sure how to entertain her all day. It’s times like these that I wish I could drive… Public transport around here is not easy to use/it takes forever.

#ThisHouseIsNotVeryBabyProofAndThisMorningIHadToRunDownTheCorridorInCaseBDecidedToGoToTheSteps

I was just turning the light off in the kitchen and I thought B was outside the door. I went to see and she was at the other end of the corridor by steps that go down, so I RAN.

#TheOtherDayOurAlarmWentOffForTheFirstTimeInMonthsAndWeActuallyHadToWakeBUpForOnceAfterSeven

I usually set the alarm to ignore as soon as B gets up. It is better when she wakes us up as we couldn’t be bothered to get up if she wasn’t going to. We got her up at 7:15 in the end.

#ItSeemsLikeAOneOffThoughAsSheHasAtLeastThreeTeethComingThroughAndUsuallyWakesUpAt6SomethingNowWhichIsOkay

She must have not been teething that morning. A few nights ago she was waking up from 4. Yesterday it was 6:30. Today she woke up at 6.

#MaybeItIsDueToHavingALaterDinnerOrMaybeItIsFromAllTheSplashingOrMaybeItIsAMixOfFactors

We will never know.

#IThinkWeWillTryPushingHerDinnerALittleLaterWhenWeGetHomeThoughAndGivingHerBiggerSnacks

People just eat later here. Yesterday I had a small dinner when B had hers (at 6ish) and then I had a second dinner at a friend’s house.

She can have a good snack when she wakes up from her second nap if she’s having a later dinner. We haven’t given her any yoghurt since we’ve been here (which we usually give her as a snack before bedtime in hope that she will sleep later).

#TheOtherDayIGotStungByALittleJellyfishWhichWasABitOfAShockButALifeguardPutSomeGelOnIt

Usually I keep a look out for them, but I was just swimming by myself and felt an electric shock in my arm. I told a friend (in bad Portuguese) and she said maybe it was muscle pain, but I didn’t think so.

Tiago was with a friend who was talking to a lifeguard, so he put some gel on it, and then a bit later the area where I got stung raised up a bit. It wouldn’t hurt and then suddenly it would. Weird. I had looked in the water but saw nothing.

#IManagedToSwallowSomeSeaWaterOnAnotherOccasionAndIEndedUpVomitingInMyHandAwkwardlyInFrontOfAFewPeople

I was trying to get out via a ladder, but lots of people kept jumping in so the water rose too high and I gulped some. I felt sick, but hoped the feeling would pass. I kept stopping in case I was sick, but thought I could get back to my towel and be okay. Tiago was with me as someone was watching B while we had a quick swim together. Suddenly I felt sick again, so put my hand to my mouth and some sadly sprayed out of the side of it. I felt embarrassed – especially with Covid and everything. Awkward. Tiago went back with water to clean it, but all evidence had already gone.

#OurConnectingFlightOnTheWayBackHasBeenDelayedByFiveHours #ThisMeansWeHaveANineHourLayoverAndWillProbablyGetHomeAtThreeInTheMorning #TheAirlinesDoNotCareWhichIsDisappointingSoWeWillHaveToSeeWhatWeCanDoOtherwiseWeWillHaveToJustDealWithIt

We have two flights by two different operators, but we bought them through one operator. The first flight is at 8am, then the second has been moved from 3pm to 8pm. Good job Tiago drove us to London as I was worried enough about catching a train with the 3pm flight (it’s a 3 hour flight). The airline we booked through don’t care, and say we can just have a refund – which isn’t great when you book months in advance for cheaper prices. The airline who delayed their flight have a first flight that is at 1pm, so that would save us waiting around so much at least but we’ll see what they say. It’s going to be a long day with a 14 month old and my pregnant belly, plus poor Tiago then has to drive us home.

#WeGotATimeAndDateForOur20WeekScanWhichIsAlsoInconvenientSoICalledAndSaidWhatDaysAreBestForUsAndTheyGivenUsAnotherInconvenientSlot

My Mum can watch B certain mornings. I said which days and they’ve given us another day where my Mum isn’t around.

#SoTiagoWillProbablyHaveToWaitWithBInTheCarAndIWillHaveToGoInAloneWhichIsAnnoyingButWhatCanWeDo

*Shrug* I’m annoyed about it, but oh well. I should call them again and complain possibly. I don’t like to be annoying and I know they’re busy.

#WeHaveTakenBToAMassiveDuckPondACoupleOfTimesWhichSheQuiteLikesAndILoveLookingAtAllTheDucklings #ThereAreNoDucksLikeTheOnesAtHomeSoItIsNiceToSeeSomeDifferentBirds

The first time we went it was early in the morning and very foggy, so we were the only ones there. The second time it was quite a bit busier. There are a lot of Muscovy ducks, some Appleyards, and some I don’t know. (My parents had ducks when I was younger.)

#IHadNeverBeenThereBeforeButIGuessThatOurPrioritiesHaveChangedNowWithBAndWeWantToGoToMoreKidFriendlyPlaces

We’ve been to a couple of swimming spots lately that I hadn’t been to before, as they’re closer and more kid friendly. I looked for a soft play or kid’s centre, but they don’t seem to have any around. Shame. Covid cases are quite low here. (I just checked and there are currently 14 people with confirmed Covid.)

#WeHaveBeenGoingToALittleCoffeeShopForBreakfastAndYesterdayBManagedToKnockTiagosCoffeeAllOverMyBreakfastAndMe

The guy had just set it all down, B went to go for my water and knocked the coffee over. I went to grab it, but realised I was too late so backed away and stood up. Luckily it just caught the end of my dress, as I didn’t want a burned belly!

#WhenWeWerePackingISaidIDidNotWantToBringManyClothesAsIEndUpWearingTheSameThreeOutfits #InRealityIHaveBeenWearingTheSameDressAndJustWashingItAndPuttingItOnAgainAsSoonAsPossible

Tiago’s Mum washed it and said she thought it was going to have a coffee stain on it, but once it dried it looked fine and I put it on again. It’s so humid here…

#WeHaveBeenRunningErrandsOrGoingToMeetFriendsWhileBSleepsAndTiagosMumKeepsAnEyeOnHer

It’s been nice to get out more, and have nice chats in the car.

#TheOtherNightWeWentToABarbequeAfterBHadGoneToBedButThenISpentTheWholeEveningSatByABabyAndAFourYearOldSoFeltBadForNotBringingHer

It’s nice that things are so kid friendly here. B had woken up early from her second nap (I think) so she had a very early bedtime, otherwise we could have brought her for a bit.

Tiago generally brings me home, then goes back out. He brought me home around 10.30pm and then got back at 2am. It’s good for him to see his friends, but I don’t know how he can stay out so late and then be fine in the morning.

#MyPortugueseSpeakingHasImprovedButIStillFindItDifficultToUnderstandWhatPeopleAreSaying

I feel motivated to try to find the time and energy to study more again – I’ve been a bit ‘lazy’ with all the pregnancies and mothering. We need to watch more kids stuff in Portuguese perhaps; I’ve been enjoying watching Bluey in Portuguese.

#IGetSoTiredSoQuicklyInTheEveningsWhenWeGoOutWhichIsProbablyDueToUsingExtraBrainPowerTryingAndGenerallyFailingToTranslate

Mothering, pregnancy plus extra brain work and socialising.

#ItIsNiceToSeePeopleButIHaveNotSocialisedThisMuchInAVeryLongTime

It is going to be a shock going home to quarantine for 10 days after being out so much. I need to make an effort to do more with B when we return, especially after I get my second jab.

17 weeks pregnant with B comparison:

Self-portrait with my hair covering the left side of my face. My right hand is pointing to where I had my whooping cough injection.
Whooping Cough Vaccine (17 Weeks)
 
#AtMyMidwifeAppointmentTheOtherDaySheSaidToGetTheWhoopingCoughVaccine
#YouHaveToBe16WeeksOrMoreAndIWasJustOver16WeeksSoIBookedAnAppointment
#IGoToTheAppointmentTodayAndAsWeAreWalkingToTheRoomTheWomanLooksAtMyBumpAndSaysNeverNeverNever
#WeSitDownAndSheIsLikeSoYouAreHereForTheWhoopingCoughVaccine
#AreYouPregnant
#YouHaveToBe16WeeksOrMore
#ISayIAm17Weeks
#SheLooksAtMeSuspiciouslyAsIGazeDownAtMyBump
#IStandUpAndPullMyTopInTightSoItAppears
#SheSaysWellIGuessYouKnowBetterYourself
#AndThereWasMeWorryingThatMyBumpWasTooBigForBeing17Weeks
#SoSheGaveMeItAndItWasAllDoneInSeconds
#IWasWaitingToDoAShootUntilAfterwardsAsIThoughtIWouldHaveAPlasterButIDidNot
#WhichIsFineAsIDidNotNeedOne
#ISaidIWouldDoAShootTodayWhereIWouldHaveATopOnAndIWouldFaceTheOtherDirection
#ButTheVaccineWasAtTheTopOfMyLeftArmSoItMadeSenseToDoItThisWay
#IGotHomeAndWasSoTiredThatIThoughtIWouldHaveANapFirst
#ISleptFor3Hours
#IHaveBeenFeelingMoreEnergeticButThisWeekWasSuperBusyAndIDidNotSleepInAsLateAsIPlanned
#IAmStillFeelingAnxiousAboutThingsAboutTheHealthOfTheBaby
#ButIAlsoRealisedTheOtherDayThatThisCouldBeTheOnlyTimeIAmEverPregnantInMyLife
#SoIShouldTryToEnjoyItAsMuchAsICan
#IDoNotKnowHowToReallyEnjoyItInTermsOfThereIsNotMuchICanDo
#ButIGuessIMeanMoreJustTryingNotToWorrySoMuch
#IGotReallyFreakedOutByTheFactThatThereIsSomeoneGrowingInsideMeAgainTheOtherDay
#PeopleAskMeIfIAmScaredOfGivingBirth
#IFeelKindOfExcitedByTheIdeaToBeHonest
#MaybeIMightChangeMyMindAsMyBumpGetsBigger
#ButIJustWantToEnjoyItAsMuchAsICanAsItSeemsLikeSuchABizarreThingThatWomenHaveBeenDoingForThousandsOfYears
#IDidNotStretchLastNightAndMyHipsHurtAllNight

This time no one mentioned to me about getting the whooping cough, so I will be getting it at around 27 weeks. No one will be saying that I don’t look pregnant enough for it this time…

It’s funning reading about ‘sleeping in late’. Now I’m like what is that? I should have relaxed more when I was pregnant with B. I used to waste so much time. Now I don’t have as much time to faff…

Definitely still anxious this time around.

I feel less excited about birth this time around, even though I would say I had a good experience with B. I am mentally trying to prepare myself though and am starting to read about things again. I am excited to meet her though…

Self-portrait wrapped up in a big cardigan that is suitable for breastfeeding.
Goodbye (For Now) Food Aversions (17 and a half weeks)
 
#IJustHadToRearrangeMy20WeekScanForASecondTime
#TheySendYouALetterForAnAppointmentInThePost
#ThenICalledUpToRescheduleItAsICouldNotMakeIt
#UsuallyTheyCheckToSeeWhatDateAndTimeICanDo
#ButThisTimeTheySaidTheDiariesWereNotOpenYetSoIWouldHaveToBeOnAWaitingList
#GotANewAppointmentDateAndTimeTodayWhichTiagoCouldNotDo
#ICouldHaveGoneAloneButTheHospitalIsQuiteFarAwayAndIThinkTiagoWantsToSeeTheBabyAsMuchAsIDo
#ThoughItIsAScanForAbnormalitiesWhichIsABitScary
#SoIWouldRatherThatTiagoIsThereTooJustIncaseItIsBadNews
#FingersCrossed
#InMorePleasantNewsALotOfMyFoodAversionsHaveDisappeared
#IHaveEatenIndianFood5TimesInTheLastWeek
#TiagoIsHappyAsHeCanCookALotOfHisUsualDishesAgain
#AndWeHadTakeawayFromOurFavouriteIndianPlaceLastWeekWhichGaveMe3Meals
#ItIsNiceToNotSitAtDinnerFeelingSickAndStrugglingToEat
#IAmAwareItMayReturnAtSomePointSoIAmJustTryingToEnjoyItWhilstICan
#TheMidwifeSaidIShouldBeEatingMorePulsesAndThingsLikeThat
#SoIAmGladThatLentilsAndChickpeasNoLongerRepulseMe
#IAmWearingOneOfMyFewPiecesOfMaternityClothing
#ItIsACardiganForPregnancyAndNursing
#ItMakesMeLookMorePregnant
#ApparentlyYouCanWearItInAFewDifferentWays
#ItWillProbablyBeHotToWearOnceTheBabyIsBornButItWillDoForNowAndForNextWinter
#ItDoesGetColdInLiverpool
#IDoNotWantToMakeAnyPurchasesForTheBabyUntilIAm6Months
#ButINeedToStartMakingASpreadsheetWithWhatWeWantToBuy
#IAmStillWorriedThatThingsMightGoWrongButIAmAlsoFeelingABitMoreRelaxed
#ItIsNiceToBeAbleToTalkAboutBeingPregnantWithMorePeopleWhenISeePeopleInPerson
#ItIsBecomingMoreObviousNowWithMyGrowingBumpButIWorryAboutBoringPeopleWithTalkingAboutItALot
#IHadToDoAFullYogaVideoLastNightAsINeededAGoodStretchAndIDefinitelyFeltBetter

Good to know that it’s been annoying getting an appointment for my 20 week scans both times.

I wasn’t into lentils and chickpeas at the start of this pregnancy either. B has baked beans on toast a lot and they were grossing me out, but I have started to have them for lunch lately (mid-October).

I didn’t wear this cardigan after having B, but it might be more appropriate with having a winter baby this time (B was a summer baby).

We really didn’t rush to buy anything for B, and thought we didn’t need much, but after she was born we bought LOADS.

It’s weird that in the end not many people saw me heavily pregnant with B.


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Categories
Pregnancy Waiting II

Portrait Of A Mother Of A Fourteen Month Old (15 Weeks / 13th August 2021)

Self-portrait of myself yawning with my eyes partially closed due the yawning. I am resting the index finger of my left hand near my left eye.
Portrait Of A Mother Of A Fourteen Month Old (15 Weeks / 13th August 2021)
 
#IShouldBePackingButInsteadIAmProcrastinatingAndDoingAShootThatIWasNotGoingToDoToday
#ItMakesSenseToGetItDoneThoughAsIWantItToHaveTheSameLookAsOtherPortraitsOfAMotherOfEtc
#HopefullyTomorrowWeWillBeGoingAwayAndIWillHaveToDoWithoutMyLightingKitForNearly3Weeks
#IHadLookedAtGettingSomethingThatWouldSuitButIAmNotEarningMuchAtTheMomentSoItFeltQuiteFrivolous
#AnywaysYesterdayWeWentToBirminghamAirportToDoOurFitToFlyPCRTests
#WeWentForTheDriveThroughOptionWhichWasGoodAsBSleptTheWholeTimeEvenWhenALoudPlaneTookOff
#IWarnedTheWomanThatIAmJustGettingOverMyMorningSicknessButItWasFineAndLessUncomfortableThanWhenIDoAFlowTestMyself
#IJustStartedToWinceOnTheLastFewSecondsOfTheTenSecondsNostrilTwisting
#WeAreDueToGetOurResultsByTenTonightThoughTheySaidItMayTake48HoursFromTheTestWhichIsTomorrowMorning
#ByThatPointWeWillBePackedAndHeadingToLondonSoIReallyHopeTheTestsAreNegative
#IFeltALotMoreHappyAndRelaxedOnceTheTestsWereDoneAsThatWasABigStressToOrganiseAndAtThisPointThereIsNotMuchWeCanDoApartFromWaitForTheResults
#ThoughIFeltLessRelaxedOnceIRealisedThatWeWillBeTestedOnArrivalTooSoWeHaveToHopeWeDoNotPickItUpBetweenTests
#ItShouldBeFineExceptForYesterdayIChattedToALotOfPeopleInThePark
#ISawACoupleWhoWeSeeAllTheTimeAndChattedToThemForTheFirstTimeWhichWasNiceButTypicallyItIsJustAsWeAreGoingAway
#AndThenISpokeToAWomanWithADogWhoWeAlsoSeeAllTheTimeButHaveNeverSpokenMuchTo
#BWasAtFirstYellingOrFrustratedlyTalkingToHerDogAndThenSheWasYellingAtASquirrel
#IHaveNoticedThatSheTalksToAllAnimalsApartFromGeeseWhichIsFairEnoughAsTheyAreScary
#TheWomanCameByAndISaidThatBOnlyLikesToTalkToAnimalsAndThenWeSpokeForAges
#AndThenWeSawAnotherWomanWithADogWhoWeUsuallySeeAboutOnceAMonthNowButByThatPointBWasFedUpAndGotScaredByHerDogBarking
#BLikesToStareALotNowAndTheOtherDayATeenagerYelledAtHerSayingWhatAreYouStaringAt
#IThinkHimYellingJustMadeBStareMoreAndHisFriendSaidToHimWhatAreYouDoingWhichIsGood
#BWokeUpAt6ThisMorningThoughMeAndTiagoWereAwakeAtHerUsualTimeAndWorryingIfSheWasAliveAsSheWasSoQuiet
#IDoNotKnowWhySheSleptLateAsInTheParkSheWasEitherInTheSwingOrHerPushchairButMaybeTheBiryaniSheHadForDinnerFilledHerUpOrSheJustWasNotTeethingAt5ForOnce
#LastNightIWokeUpAndBoltedAcrossTheRoomAsInMyDreamBWasAboutToFallOffTheKitchenCounter
#BMakesMeLaughAsYesterdayNanWasPickingCrumbsUpOffTheFloorWhileBSatNextToHerPlayingWithTheVelcroOnNansShoes
#IHaveMyMidwifeAppointmentTodayAtLunchSoHopefullyThatWillAllGoOkay
#WeirdlyTheMidwifeAndIThoughtWeRecognisedEachOtherButIDoNotThinkWeHaveEverMetBefore
#SheWasAlsoLovelyAndIsAboutAWeekMorePregnantThanMeWhichIsCoolButAlsoAnnoyingAsIWantHerAsMyMidwife
#AtMyLastAppointmentTheySaidTheyMayOrMayNotListenForAHeartbeatAsItIsUsuallyTooEarly
#ButSheTriedAndItWasReassuringToHearItAndSheSaidIfIEverWantToCheckItToJustSendHerAMessage

#IShouldBePackingButInsteadIAmProcrastinatingAndDoingAShootThatIWasNotGoingToDoToday

I just realised that the reminders I write to myself were stacking up, and if I do this today then I can chill about doing work for a little bit.

#ItMakesSenseToGetItDoneThoughAsIWantItToHaveTheSameLookAsOtherPortraitsOfAMotherOfEtc

And this. I had debated just doing a shoot today then writing another day.

#HopefullyTomorrowWeWillBeGoingAwayAndIWillHaveToDoWithoutMyLightingKitForNearly3Weeks

I’m sure I’ll manage, it just ruins the look of the project a little bit but oh well. It might mix it up in a good way…

#IHadLookedAtGettingSomethingThatWouldSuitButIAmNotEarningMuchAtTheMomentSoItFeltQuiteFrivolous

And researching/reading reviews takes up so much time.

#AnywaysYesterdayWeWentToBirminghamAirportToDoOurFitToFlyPCRTests

We had looked at other options, but they’d sold out. I think I mentioned it in my last entry/post (I still don’t know what to call these).

#WeWentForTheDriveThroughOptionWhichWasGoodAsBSleptTheWholeTimeEvenWhenALoudPlaneTookOff

Having to park and go through a walk in felt like more hassle. Especially as we did not know what time B would wake up in the morning (5:15am for the record) and if we would disturb her napping (she fell asleep before we got to the airport).

She did briefly open her eyes just after we started to move again, she sleepily smiled at me then went back to sleep. When we got home she stayed in the car for an hour continuing to nap…

#IWarnedTheWomanThatIAmJustGettingOverMyMorningSicknessButItWasFineAndLessUncomfortableThanWhenIDoAFlowTestMyself #IJustStartedToWinceOnTheLastFewSecondsOfTheTenSecondsNostrilTwisting

I thought that I had better warn her in case I made some weird noises or something. She said she would go slow and I could take a break whenever I wanted but it was fine. I was glad that I got a woman, but it seemed like policy which was good (Tiago got a guy).

#WeAreDueToGetOurResultsByTenTonightThoughTheySaidItMayTake48HoursFromTheTestWhichIsTomorrowMorning #ByThatPointWeWillBePackedAndHeadingToLondonSoIReallyHopeTheTestsAreNegative

It is so stressful. I don’t see why people are bothering to go abroad to places where you need to test loads if you are just going for a week and not visiting family… I need to look at booking day 2 and day 8 tests for when I get back. Tiago only needs to do day 2, and B doesn’t need to do them. Phew.

#IFeltALotMoreHappyAndRelaxedOnceTheTestsWereDoneAsThatWasABigStressToOrganiseAndAtThisPointThereIsNotMuchWeCanDoApartFromWaitForTheResults #ThoughIFeltLessRelaxedOnceIRealisedThatWeWillBeTestedOnArrivalTooSoWeHaveToHopeWeDoNotPickItUpBetweenTests

It’d be bloody typical…

#ItShouldBeFineExceptForYesterdayIChattedToALotOfPeopleInThePark

Typically I often go to the park and hope to talk to people and I talk to no one. Yesterday was our chattiest day in a longgg time, if ever.

#ISawACoupleWhoWeSeeAllTheTimeAndChattedToThemForTheFirstTimeWhichWasNiceButTypicallyItIsJustAsWeAreGoingAway

I think I have mentioned them before (I hope it doesn’t get to the point where they might read this blog and find it awkward – hello if so).

Their kid is the same age as B and we have seen them around since we moved here. It was nice to finally chat. We always say we should say hello to them, but after a while it feels like too late to say hello. I took B to the swings though and they were next to us, so I felt like I should ‘go for it’. They’re so nice, and we chatted for ages. B was getting restless, so I thought I should take her home for dinner and a run around.

#AndThenISpokeToAWomanWithADogWhoWeAlsoSeeAllTheTimeButHaveNeverSpokenMuchTo

Once I was sat with B on a picnic blanket and the dog just came and sat next to her randomly. We spoke briefly then, but that was monthsss ago I think.

#BWasAtFirstYellingOrFrustratedlyTalkingToHerDogAndThenSheWasYellingAtASquirrel

I feel bad as I keep saying she is yelling, but she is probably just talking loudly and gets frustrated as they never come closer to her and/or talk back…

#IHaveNoticedThatSheTalksToAllAnimalsApartFromGeeseWhichIsFairEnoughAsTheyAreScary

At first I put evil instead of scary, but thought I might offend geese lovers. They just get quite defensive and hiss a lot. My parents used to have geese and once one bit my foot (luckily I was wearing steel toe capped boots, but still). I have been weary of them since…

#TheWomanCameByAndISaidThatBOnlyLikesToTalkToAnimalsAndThenWeSpokeForAges

She was smiling and I was in a good mood from talking to the couple. We spoke about lots of things from when she gave birth husbands were not allowed in the hospital at all, to anti-vaxxers. She’s also lovely.

#AndThenWeSawAnotherWomanWithADogWhoWeUsuallySeeAboutOnceAMonthNowButByThatPointBWasFedUpAndGotScaredByHerDogBarking

Last time we saw them it was early in the morning. We caught them this time as they came out early and we were late from chatting to so many people. I had to pick B up as she was scared by his barking. He’s a very friendly dog though.

#BLikesToStareALotNowAndTheOtherDayATeenagerYelledAtHerSayingWhatAreYouStaringAt

I was pushing B across the grass and she was sat on the standing board just chilling and looking at the world. I saw her looking at them and I looked briefly and smiled at them.

#IThinkHimYellingJustMadeBStareMoreAndHisFriendSaidToHimWhatAreYouDoingWhichIsGood

Maybe he was yelling at me, but I doubt it as B was having a good long look. So awkward. Glad his friend told him off as he was probably just showing off, but it did make me feel uncomfortable. I just didn’t look or say anything. Then a guy commented that B was staring a lot, but he was being friendly and was with his kids.

#BWokeUpAt6ThisMorningThoughMeAndTiagoWereAwakeAtHerUsualTimeAndWorryingIfSheWasAliveAsSheWasSoQuiet

Yesterday she was trying to get my Nan’s salt shaker off her tall table and I think it may have hit her on the head, so I was keeping an eye on her because of that.

#IDoNotKnowWhySheSleptLateAsInTheParkSheWasEitherInTheSwingOrHerPushchairButMaybeTheBiryaniSheHadForDinnerFilledHerUpOrSheJustWasNotTeethingAt5ForOnce

She wasn’t running around a lot, unless it was from all the listening? Maybe dinner was filling (she didn’t eat any yoghurt before bed like she usually does), or maybe it was down to teething. She never seems to stop teething, so maybe it did for a little bit and so she slept better. Who knows?

#LastNightIWokeUpAndBoltedAcrossTheRoomAsInMyDreamBWasAboutToFallOffTheKitchenCounter

Lol. There is no kitchen counter in our room. Tiago just said ‘are you alright?’ as my urgency woke him up. Classic.

#BMakesMeLaughAsYesterdayNanWasPickingCrumbsUpOffTheFloorWhileBSatNextToHerPlayingWithTheVelcroOnNansShoes

She is funny. She must like the sound. Today she realised she could make a sound on the cupboard with her fingers.

#IHaveMyMidwifeAppointmentTodayAtLunchSoHopefullyThatWillAllGoOkay

I have left myself four hashtags to write about it. Fun times.

#WeirdlyTheMidwifeAndIThoughtWeRecognisedEachOtherButIDoNotThinkWeHaveEverMetBefore

I was thinking I recognised her (even with her mask on) and then she said that she thought she had met me before. I’ve only had a couple of appointments though and they weren’t with her. I’ve recently moved GP surgery and it is better as I will have more of my appointments there rather than random centres, and I like her.

#SheWasAlsoLovelyAndIsAboutAWeekMorePregnantThanMeWhichIsCoolButAlsoAnnoyingAsIWantHerAsMyMidwife

Happy for her, but it’s typical. She said from her 30 weeks she might have to just work from home due to shielding, but she said we’ll see what the rules are. In Liverpool, my midwife was due to take sick leave but then she didn’t – but in the end she wasn’t my midwife as I didn’t have a homebirth. My midwife today said I could have a homebirth if I wanted, but I said it’s probably not very polite as we live at my Nan’s place.

#AtMyLastAppointmentTheySaidTheyMayOrMayNotListenForAHeartbeatAsItIsUsuallyTooEarly #ButSheTriedAndItWasReassuringToHearItAndSheSaidIfIEverWantToCheckItToJustSendHerAMessage

I know in Liverpool they were a bit weird about it. I guess it freaks people out if they don’t hear it, but the midwife today said that if it’s not good news then you wouldn’t hear much at all. The baby was hiding behind my placenta, but she could hear it moving and my placenta was being noisy. She kept trying to get a clearer sound for me, but I said as long as she was happy that all was good then it was fine with me.

Some reassuring news before our possible holiday. Fingers crossed.

15 weeks pregnant with B comparison:

Self-portrait wearing a black and white stripy dress. I am looking at the camera and have my left thumb touching my lips, and the rest of my fingers closing my left eye.
Maternity Clothes (15 and a half weeks)
 
#SoMyFirstMaternityClothesHaveArrived
#IDidNotWantToCurseThingsByBuyingThemTooEarly
#ButIDefinitelyNeededNewBras
#IAmTryingOutTheClipsThatYouUseSoYouCanFeed
#ItIsStartingToGetEasier
#ButIDoNotWantToPracticeTooMuch
#InCaseIBreakThatFunctionBeforeIActuallyNeedThem
#IHaveStartedToEditMyProjectDownNowSoIDoNotHaveToDoItLaterOn
#IHaveToPickMyFavouriteImageFromAllThePreviousShoots
#AndThenIMightTryDrawingOnThem
#ToHelpWithMyAnxietyAndWorries
#IDoDefinitelyHaveABumpNow
#ThoughIThinkDuringTheDayMostOfItIsDueToFood
#IHaveStartedToDoYogaOrPilatesOrStretchingInTheMorningAndEveningNow
#IHaveGotIntoAGoodHabitOfDoingItInTheMorning
#ButTheLastCoupleOfDaysIHaveBeenDoingItInTheEveningTooAsIFeelLikeINeedIt
#AndIAmStartingToGetPelvicPainNow
#AtLeastISeemToHaveMoreEnergyTheseDays
#IStillFeelABitSickButIAmNotBeingSick
#TheClosestIGetToBeingSickAtTheMomentIsWheneverIBrushMyTeeth
#IHaveTriedAllDifferentToothpastesButMyBodyHatesIt
#ITryToThinkOfDoughnutsAndUnicorns
#ApparentlyInWeek16TheBabyWillBeTheSizeOfADoughnut
#SoIMightGetOneToCelebrateAsIHaveBeenThinkingAboutThemForWeeks
#WheneverIAmSomewhereThatSellsThemINeverWantThemThough
#ApartFromMaybeThoseVansThatSellDinkieDoughnutsOrWhateverTheyAreCalledTheseDays
#AnywaysThisIsMyFirstMaternityDress
#IHateShoppingButISawItAndLikedItWhichIsRareSoIThoughtIShouldGetIt
#IAmBoredOfPregnancyAdsNow
#IWantToSeeOtherThings
#AFewYearsAgoWhenIUsedToGetPregnancyTestAdsOnYouTubeIWasSurprisedThatAGuyInMyImprovClassGotAdvertsForTomatoSoup

Well, coincidentally I have my left hand touching my face and one eye closed.

I have been wearing this dress since B was born, and I have been wearing it a lot lately. I haven’t bought any maternity clothes this time, but I have been given a maternity jumper.

I ended up not wearing the clip bras much, and ended up wearing the ones that you just move the bra with your hands. I’ve been wearing them lately anyways as they’re so comfy.

I never ended up drawing on the pictures, but I have got a lot quicker at editing. I usually edit the shoot on the day of the shoot or the day after now.

I feel like I haven’t had any pelvic pain yet with this pregnancy, but I have been doing pregnancy stretches in the morning and evening since getting a positive test this time which I think has helped.

I tried to distract myself more this time than think about doughnuts and unicorns when I feel sick – the thought of doughnuts is making me hungry. There are some jam doughnuts in the kitchen actually, but I’m not a fan.

I feel like I haven’t had too many pregnancy ads this time, but I am also making an effort to not accept all cookies on sites anymore. I could eat a cookie or five.


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Categories
Pregnancy Waiting II

Imitating B Hiding Using Her Hands (14 Weeks / 4th August 2021)

Self-portrait with my hands over my face, but showing my left eye.
Imitating B Hiding Using Her Hands (14 Weeks / 4th August 2021)
 
#SheLikesToPutOneHandInTheMiddleOfHerFaceAndOneOnTheSideOfHerFace
#MaybeSheIsNotTryingToHideButItSeemsLikeTheMostLogicalReasonWhySheIsDoingIt
#SheNowHasAClimbingFrameAndABouncyZebraSetUpInTheLivingRoom
#WeSetThemUpOnTheSameDayAndSheWasHavingABallGoingBetweenTheTwoThenClimbingOnAChair
#TheMorningAfterSheWokeUpAtSixForTheFirstTimeInAgesWhichMightHaveJustBeenAFluke
#SheKeepsWakingUpLoadsAtNightAtTheMomentAndIThinkItIsDueToTeething
#MoreTopTeethAreComingThroughAndIThinkSomeMolarsArePlanningToJoinSoon
#BrushingHerTeethIsSuchAFaffWhichPutsUsOffButWeNeedToStartTryingToDoItTwiceADay
#BrushingMyOwnTeethIsAlsoAFaffAndQuiteUnpleasant
#IFeelMySickestInTheEveningNowAndIDoNotLookForwardToBrushingMyTeeth
#IWasSickStraightAfterBrushingThemTwoNightsAgoAndTheTasteOfSickWasStillThereTwoHoursLater
#IDidNotHaveThisLingeringSickTasteWithBAsIWasUsuallyAlwaysSickFirstThingInTheMorning
#ItIsHorribleAndIWouldNotWishItOnAnyone
#IAmFourteenishWeeksNowWhichMeansIMustBeAThirdOfTheWayThroughThePregnancyNow
#IAmQuiteAnxiousAndEveryTimeIGetACrampIFeelNervous
#IAmPlanningToAnnounceMyPregnancyTomorrowAsIThinkItIsGettingHarderToHideInDanceVideos
#AndIHaveRanOutOfNonPregnancyRelatedImagesToPost
#IFeelAwkwardInCaseSomethingBadHappensButIGuessTheWholePointOfDocumentingAndSharingMyMotherhoodStoryIsItBeingAsHonestAsPossible
#IThinkIHaveAlreadyStartedToNestAsIAmSuddenlyEnjoyingSortingThroughOurStuffAndCleaning
#WeHaveMadeMoreSpaceInOurBedroomSoThatWeCanHangOutWithBInIt
#SoIThinkThisHasMadeMeWantToGetOrganisedAndToBeFairItIsBetterToDoItNowThanWhenTheBabyComes
#BHasSuddenlyStartedToMakeALotOfGNoisesAndJustMakesLotsOfSounds
#IWishIKnewWhatSheWasTryingToSay
#SheHasLearnedToSayYeahAndSheSaysItALotWhenIAskHerQuestionsButIDoNotKnowIfSheReallyUnderstandsWhatSheIsSaying
#SheIsSoSpeedyAndIsAbleToReachThingsThatAreFurtherAwayNowOnHerTipToes
#ThisMorningSheWasUpOnTheSofaRippingATissueIntoManyPieces
#SheStillDoesNotReallyWantToWalkInHerShoesSoINeedToPutThemOnHerEveryday
#SheIsDefinitelyDaddysLittleGirlWhoWantsToBeInHisArmsAtAnyOpportunity
#WhenHeGoesOutSheGetsUpsetButITellTiagoToMakeSureHeAlwaysSaysByeAndWeWillWaveHimOffForABit
#AndThenITryToDistractHerAndSheDoesUsuallyMoveOnAfterAMinute

#SheLikesToPutOneHandInTheMiddleOfHerFaceAndOneOnTheSideOfHerFace #MaybeSheIsNotTryingToHideButItSeemsLikeTheMostLogicalReasonWhySheIsDoingIt

Sometimes she just puts a hand on the side of her head, which may or may not be down to teething.

#SheNowHasAClimbingFrameAndABouncyZebraSetUpInTheLivingRoom

The climbing frame was supposed to come on a Friday, but eventually arrived on a Tuesday so she had to wait for the weekend for us to set it up.

#WeSetThemUpOnTheSameDayAndSheWasHavingABallGoingBetweenTheTwoThenClimbingOnAChair

My Nan got the zebra from a charity shop for four quid. Of course at first she loved the zebra more. They have the same one at the soft play place I took her to, but she was too young for it then and it had no batteries in it – the music adds a lot to it.

She likes to hang on the climbing frame and watch TV.

#TheMorningAfterSheWokeUpAtSixForTheFirstTimeInAgesWhichMightHaveJustBeenAFluke

I was hoping it was her new things wearing her out. Potentially so, but now she’s back to waking up between 5.15 and 5.45 again.

#SheKeepsWakingUpLoadsAtNightAtTheMomentAndIThinkItIsDueToTeething

She’ll wake up a lot until midnight and then she seems to conk out until 5 something. Actually I think I’m lying; she does wake up at one, two, four, whatever, except for last night.

#MoreTopTeethAreComingThroughAndIThinkSomeMolarsArePlanningToJoinSoon

I feel sorry for her. It must be so unpleasant.

#BrushingHerTeethIsSuchAFaffWhichPutsUsOffButWeNeedToStartTryingToDoItTwiceADay

I feel embarrassed to admit that we have only been brushing her teeth once a day, but we need to start doing it more. I’m not looking forward to it.

#BrushingMyOwnTeethIsAlsoAFaffAndQuiteUnpleasant

I tried changing my toothpaste but that hasn’t really helped.

#IFeelMySickestInTheEveningNowAndIDoNotLookForwardToBrushingMyTeeth

I think sometimes I eat too much in the evenings, so last night I tried eating a bit less. I still felt sick, but I managed to not be sick after brushing my teeth at night.

#IWasSickStraightAfterBrushingThemTwoNightsAgoAndTheTasteOfSickWasStillThereTwoHoursLater

I could not be bothered to have a shower, but I did the gargling, constant nose blowing, spitting etc. After I lay down for bed a lot more came up. It’s horrid.

#IDidNotHaveThisLingeringSickTasteWithBAsIWasUsuallyAlwaysSickFirstThingInTheMorning

Lucky me. It wasn’t bad at all then as it was water that would come up.

#ItIsHorribleAndIWouldNotWishItOnAnyone

It’s so horrid.

#IAmFourteenishWeeksNowWhichMeansIMustBeAThirdOfTheWayThroughThePregnancyNow

I thought with B I’d be a 42-weeker. This time I do not want to be, but you never know.

#IAmQuiteAnxiousAndEveryTimeIGetACrampIFeelNervous

I don’t know how people can be chill for their whole pregnancy. Is anyone?

#IAmPlanningToAnnounceMyPregnancyTomorrowAsIThinkItIsGettingHarderToHideInDanceVideos #AndIHaveRanOutOfNonPregnancyRelatedImagesToPost

This makes it sounds like people care. No one cares, but for me it is a big deal. I’ve been dragging out posting my non pregnancy related stuff for a while – going down from two posts a week to one. Now I need to post a backlog of stuff…

#IFeelAwkwardInCaseSomethingBadHappensButIGuessTheWholePointOfDocumentingAndSharingMyMotherhoodStoryIsItBeingAsHonestAsPossible

With B I waited until after I was 20 weeks, but that was because it took so long to get my syndrome results back. I’m hoping sharing my story this time might help others who may be at similar stage – I’m bored of reading comments on different platforms about people being dumb for getting pregnant during a pandemic.

#IThinkIHaveAlreadyStartedToNestAsIAmSuddenlyEnjoyingSortingThroughOurStuffAndCleaning

I just wish I had more time to do it. Yesterday B was sat on the floor with me while I tried to sort through things. I’m playing my favourite game of ‘would I pay £5 to ship this book to keep it?’ I need to be quite ruthless.

#WeHaveMadeMoreSpaceInOurBedroomSoThatWeCanHangOutWithBInIt

We’ve lived with my Nan for 9 months now. We’re grateful, but we need some more space to ourselves. We keep looking at moving out, but we are looking for something short term now and there is not much about. By us living with her she gets support, and we also get support. I think it is normal to want more space, though I feel bad for saying these things.

#SoIThinkThisHasMadeMeWantToGetOrganisedAndToBeFairItIsBetterToDoItNowThanWhenTheBabyComes

I do not think that I will be nesting to the same level as when B was born, as I will have B to look after. Also with how our living arrangement is it will be harder to organise things without waking one of them up.

#BHasSuddenlyStartedToMakeALotOfGNoisesAndJustMakesLotsOfSounds

No gaga yet, but just a lot of riffing on g sounds.

#IWishIKnewWhatSheWasTryingToSay

It might not be too long now before she talks more.

#SheHasLearnedToSayYeahAndSheSaysItALotWhenIAskHerQuestionsButIDoNotKnowIfSheReallyUnderstandsWhatSheIsSaying

‘Do you want some water?’ ‘Yeah’ Does she really want some water though?

#SheIsSoSpeedyAndIsAbleToReachThingsThatAreFurtherAwayNowOnHerTipToes

If she hears a door open she is off. Life is just a game of moving things further away from B and her grasp.

#ThisMorningSheWasUpOnTheSofaRippingATissueIntoManyPieces

She had about four tissues at first, but I took them away except for one. She had a lot of fun ripping it up. I figured it’s good for a lot of skills, though I probably shouldn’t encourage her.

#SheStillDoesNotReallyWantToWalkInHerShoesSoINeedToPutThemOnHerEveryday

At the park yesterday she was just sat down by the swings. She did do a few steps at one point but she is not a fan.

#SheIsDefinitelyDaddysLittleGirlWhoWantsToBeInHisArmsAtAnyOpportunity

I do not mind as it gives me a break, and I know she sees me all the time so she’s not so bothered by me.

#WhenHeGoesOutSheGetsUpsetButITellTiagoToMakeSureHeAlwaysSaysByeAndWeWillWaveHimOffForABit

When I leave she does not care at all, which is good. Tiago will put B down and she will cry, but I have to tell him that once he has put her down he should not pick her up again – as I think she cries more as she knows he usually will pick her up again. It sounds mean, but he usually puts her down as he has things to do, so he needs to go do them.

#AndThenITryToDistractHerAndSheDoesUsuallyMoveOnAfterAMinute

This morning we waved bye through the window, then I took her to the living room before he’d pulled away and within 30 seconds she was fine.

13 weeks pregnant with B comparison:

(I don’t have a picture from 14 weeks, and I’ll save the 14 and a half weeks one for my next post.)

Self-portrait looking off to my lower left. I look quite tired and sick.
I Feel Like All I Write About At The Moment Is Vomit (13 Weeks)
 

#IFeelLikeAllIWriteAboutAtTheMomentIsVomit
#IHad2SickFreeDaysWhichWasMyLongestTimeSinceBeforeMyMorningSicknessBegan
#ThenIWasSickAt4AM
#AndItWasTheFirstOf9TimesInOneDay
#IAteABigMealOfRiceAndBeansTheNightBefore
#MyBrotherInLawLoadedMyPlateAndIForgotThatIHadBeenEatingSmallMealsALotLately
#IAteALotForBreakfastToo
#IWokeUpWithSuchAHeavyStomachThatIKnewTheOnlyWayIWouldFeelBetterWasToThrowUp
#ThenIHadToGoAgain20MinutesLater
#AndAnother20MinutesLater
#TiagoWentIntoTownToGetRehydrationSalts
#HeHadNeverHeardOfThemAndCameBackWith3SmallCartonsThatCostHim12Euros
#SoIDrankTheFirstVerySlowlyButIThinkItWentIntoTheToilet
#IFeltSoWeakAndIWasWorriedAboutTheBaby
#SoEvenAfterBeingSickIWouldTryToEatAgain
#EventuallyInTheEveningIManagedToKeepADrinkDown
#ThenTiagoStartedToBeSickAndIKnewItWasNotMorningSickness
#IThoughtMaybeItWasAStomachBugButIThoughtTheRiceHadJustUpsetMeALot
#ItRemindedMeOfBeingOnACaravanHolidayAtTheEndOfMiddleSchoolOrEarlyHighSchoolWhereIJustThrewUpFor24Hours
#IWouldNotWishSicknessOnMyWorstEnemy
#IFeltSoWeakAndHorrible
#IHopeIEnterTheNiceStageOfPregnancySoon
#IAmFeelingConcernedForTheBaby
#IAmStillNotCompletelyOverMyCold
#ItIsNiceBeingSomewhereSunnyForAWeek
#ButThereIsNothingLikeBeingAtHomeWithMyUsualRoutineAndFood
#MyAppetiteIsNotGreatAndIAmNotAbleToBuyThingsThatIUsuallyLikeToEat
#AndIThinkNotHavingMyUsualEatingRoutineMayHaveContributedToMySickness
#ButHopefullyEverythingIsOkay
#AndICanEnjoyTheLastCoupleOfDaysOfSunAndVitaminD

Well, I have been mentioning vomit a lot lately. I was more sick when I was pregnant with B though. Luckily my food aversions didn’t seem so bad this time too.

With this image/hashtags I think I must have actually had a stomach bug or something as Tiago was also sick at least once. We were visiting his brother in Portugal at time and I was really struggling to find food that I wanted to eat as all my usual favourite things weren’t really available.

I’m starting to feel sick just looking at this image and reading the hashtags…


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Categories
Pregnancy Waiting II

Imitating B Climbing On The Step Ladder (10 Weeks? / 6th July 2021)

Self-portrait on a stepladder. I am looking back at the camera over my right shoulder, my left elbow is in the air and my feet are tucked together.
Imitating B Climbing On The Step Ladder (10 Weeks? / 6th July 2021)
 
#BLovesToClimbOnAndOffThisStepLadderButLuckilySheOnlyGoesToTheFirstStep
#SheLikesToPutHerKneesOnItAndHoldOnToTheSides
#ThisMorningIHadMyBackToHerWhileIWasDoingTheWashingUpAndAfterHearingALittleYellITurnedToSeeHerHangingOffOfIt
#IThoughtAboutGrabbingMyPhoneAndTakingAPictureButLuckilyCommonSenseKickedInAndIGotToHerJustAsSheBeganToFallOff
#MyInterpretationWillProbablyNotBeThatGreatAsIAmALotBiggerThanHerAndIAmPregnant
#TheBigDramaThoughWasBEatingSomeOfHerSkinCreamTheOtherDay
#IWentIntoHerRoomAndSawTheLidWasOffAndIWasSureIHadPutItBackOn
#ThenIWasChangingHerNappyAndISawHerPutSomethingInHerMouthQuiteCasually
#IRealisedItWasHerSkinCreamSoICalled111AndAfterTwentyMinutesIGotToSpeakToSomeone
#AfterGoingThroughALongChecklistTheySaidSomeoneWouldCallUsBackInABitButIfHerConditionChangedThenWeShouldCallBack
#TheySaidItHasALowToxicityAndAsSheDidNotEatMuchSheWouldBeOkayAndSheHasBeenFine
#IAmSurprisedSomethingLikeThisHasNotHappenedBeforeButItWasNotAProudParentingMoment
#AHealthVisitorCalledYesterdayAboutBAndTheQuestionnaireTheySentUsAFewMonthsAgoAboutHer
#ISaidIHadNoConcernsButTheyAskedIfIWantedToBringHerInToWeighAndMeasureHer
#ISaidYesButTheCentreIsQuiteAWayAwaySoTheySaidTheyCouldJustDoAHomeVisit
#IAmNowPotentiallyAQuarterOfTheWayThroughThePregnancy
#IAmSoBoredOfBeingSickAlreadyThoughIAmTryingMyBestToAvoidIt
#IHaveBeenSickThirteenTimesWhichIKnowAsIAmMakingASequelToPukePortraits
#LastNightIWasSickAfterBrushingMyTeethAndICouldNotGetTheSickTasteFromMyThroat
#WithBIWasGenerallyAlwaysSickInTheMorningButNowThereIsNotReallyAPattern
#InsomniaIsStartingToKickInAlreadyAndLastNightIWasAwakeFromThreeToFour
#WeAreTryingToGetBToWakeUpLaterByChangingWhenSheHasHerMilkAndGivingHerMoreSnacksAndGivingHerYoghurtBeforeBedButSheGenerallyStillWakesUpEarly
#OneThingIAmEnjoyingIsMyCravingForBreakfastBurritosWhichIHaveInTheMorning
#AWrapThreeHashBrownsTwoScrambledEggsAndDipsYum
#IAmDreamingALotMoreAndGenerallyTheyResultInMeGettingUpToLookForBAsIThinkSheHasFallenSomewhereInOurRoom
#TiagoSaysHeOftenSeesMeWalkingOutOfTheRoomAndWondersWhereIAmGoing
#IAmWorriedAboutMasksSoonNoLongerBeingLegallyRequiredAsIThinkALotOfPeopleWillNotWearThem
#IDoNotGoCurrentlyGoOutToManyPlacesAndIThinkIWillFeelEvenMoreLimitedWithMyOptionsWhenTheRulesChange
#IWorryThatPeopleWillFeelMoreComfortableWalkingCloserToPeopleWhoAreWearingMasksWhenTheyAreNotWearingThemThemselves
#IHaveStartedToTakeBForWalksAtSevenInTheMorningInsteadOfGoingOutAfterTheSchoolsHaveFinishedForTheDay

#BLovesToClimbOnAndOffThisStepLadderButLuckilySheOnlyGoesToTheFirstStep

At the moment. By the time I post this things could be different.

(10th September: She has a climbing frame now, but she still hangs on the steps sometimes.)

#SheLikesToPutHerKneesOnItAndHoldOnToTheSides

Which is what I will try to imitate if I don’t topple it.

#ThisMorningIHadMyBackToHerWhileIWasDoingTheWashingUpAndAfterHearingALittleYellITurnedToSeeHerHangingOffOfIt

I guess she had stuck her legs through the gap then had let go and was doing a kind of back bend.

She is quite good at getting on and off it now so I thought I was okay to do the washing up. I often will just sit there and be ready to grab her if need be as I don’t want to say ‘careful’ to her too much. We need to get her a climbing frame.

#IThoughtAboutGrabbingMyPhoneAndTakingAPictureButLuckilyCommonSenseKickedInAndIGotToHerJustAsSheBeganToFallOff

I would have been way too slow to get a picture and I’m sure Tiago will witness it for himself at some point.

#MyInterpretationWillProbablyNotBeThatGreatAsIAmALotBiggerThanHerAndIAmPregnant

I need to be careful. I’ll move it into B’s room as there won’t be much space for all my kit in the kitchen and it’s awkward with my Nan around doing shoots.

(10th September: It was quite hard to photograph as B is small and I am big, and I’m pregnant. It hurt my knees…)

#TheBigDramaThoughWasBEatingSomeOfHerSkinCreamTheOtherDay

She’s been itching her chest a lot lately though the skin looks fine.

#IWentIntoHerRoomAndSawTheLidWasOffAndIWasSureIHadPutItBackOn

Now I am starting to think I didn’t as I was going to use it shortly, or B knocked it off.

#ThenIWasChangingHerNappyAndISawHerPutSomethingInHerMouthQuiteCasually #IRealisedItWasHerSkinCreamSoICalled111AndAfterTwentyMinutesIGotToSpeakToSomeone

She had just quite casually scooped her fingers in it and then put her fingers in her mouth. I realised quite quickly and pulled them away from her. Her bottom lip started to tremble like it does when she realises that I am stressed/annoyed. Calling 999 seemed liked overkill. It took me about 5 minutes to get to the right option. They said the website chat was quicker but not suitable for under 5s. Great.

#AfterGoingThroughALongChecklistTheySaidSomeoneWouldCallUsBackInABitButIfHerConditionChangedThenWeShouldCallBack

Well, waiting 20 minutes to tell them wouldn’t have been great.

#TheySaidItHasALowToxicityAndAsSheDidNotEatMuchSheWouldBeOkayAndSheHasBeenFine

Phew. That was a wakeup call.

#IAmSurprisedSomethingLikeThisHasNotHappenedBeforeButItWasNotAProudParentingMoment

It’s awkward to admit it, but yeah I screwed up. I had already forgotten about it though, but I send myself reminders of what to talk about in my next set of hashtags – I didn’t manage to fit everything into my last set, so some of these are things that I planned to say last time. I want to keep within Instagram’s post limits, but I’m getting too good at waffling on.

#AHealthVisitorCalledYesterdayAboutBAndTheQuestionnaireTheySentUsAFewMonthsAgoAboutHer

The one where they were like ‘we’re not coming round but you do this questionnaire’ while friends’ kids in Liverpool got seen in person. Still bitter.

#ISaidIHadNoConcernsButTheyAskedIfIWantedToBringHerInToWeighAndMeasureHer

Why not? I guess they just want to check on her. I wonder if they got flagged by my 111 call? Am I worried that I am on a watch list now? Maybe a little.

#ISaidYesButTheCentreIsQuiteAWayAwaySoTheySaidTheyCouldJustDoAHomeVisit

I don’t drive. I definitely won’t be in a rush to take public transport now with mask rules changing. Tiago has to work and I can’t expect him to drop us off everywhere all the time. I was quite relieved when they said they could do a home visit as the first three dates and times she said would have been a struggle for us. I guess their rules have changed and they will do home visits now. Shrug.

#IAmNowPotentiallyAQuarterOfTheWayThroughThePregnancy

I am hoping this baby will not be a 42 weeker. B arrived just before 39 weeks, so I hoping it will be similar.

#IAmSoBoredOfBeingSickAlreadyThoughIAmTryingMyBestToAvoidIt #IHaveBeenSickThirteenTimesWhichIKnowAsIAmMakingASequelToPukePortraits

I think I have said that I definitely feel worse when I stand up. Some days I feel sick all day and just have to stay as close to being seated as possible. Sometimes I am sick just to try to get the feeling to pass, but sometimes it doesn’t.

#LastNightIWasSickAfterBrushingMyTeethAndICouldNotGetTheSickTasteFromMyThroat

It was grim. I feel sick just thinking about it.

#WithBIWasGenerallyAlwaysSickInTheMorningButNowThereIsNotReallyAPattern

Looking at the times it bounces all over the place from morning, afternoon to night.

#InsomniaIsStartingToKickInAlreadyAndLastNightIWasAwakeFromThreeToFour

Great. Note to self: Don’t faff on social media to try to go back to sleep. It does not work. I’m currently reading Mythos by Stephen Fry, and after all the faffing I read a bit of that and it’s so intense that I felt sleepy quite quickly. I used to read a lot in the night when I had insomnia with B.

It seems a bit early to be having these bouts of waking up, but it is what it is.

#WeAreTryingToGetBToWakeUpLaterByChangingWhenSheHasHerMilkAndGivingHerMoreSnacksAndGivingHerYoghurtBeforeBedButSheGenerallyStillWakesUpEarly

Great. If she woke up at 6 every day it would not be so bad. Last night she was awake loads, but I think it is due to the front top tooth of hers that has been showing itself for a bit now.

Now we give her milk with her meals as we were giving it to her between them, but it can’t be that filling. Now she has fruit/veg snacks, and instead of having yoghurt straight after dinner she has it about an hour later.

#OneThingIAmEnjoyingIsMyCravingForBreakfastBurritosWhichIHaveInTheMorning #AWrapThreeHashBrownsTwoScrambledEggsAndDipsYum

I was craving them for about 3 days before I asked Tiago to get me all the components. I’ve had one for breakfast for the last week now. I seem to enjoy breakfast the most. Dinner is a struggle. I had a phase of that with B, when I had to eat pasta and veg for dinner every night.

#IAmDreamingALotMoreAndGenerallyTheyResultInMeGettingUpToLookForBAsIThinkSheHasFallenSomewhereInOurRoom #TiagoSaysHeOftenSeesMeWalkingOutOfTheRoomAndWondersWhereIAmGoing

Last night I dreamed that she had been sick and got yoghurt everywhere.

#IAmWorriedAboutMasksSoonNoLongerBeingLegallyRequiredAsIThinkALotOfPeopleWillNotWearThem #IDoNotGoCurrentlyGoOutToManyPlacesAndIThinkIWillFeelEvenMoreLimitedWithMyOptionsWhenTheRulesChange #IWorryThatPeopleWillFeelMoreComfortableWalkingCloserToPeopleWhoAreWearingMasksWhenTheyAreNotWearingThemThemselves

My last hashtag was originally ‘I’m debating getting a hi vis jacket that says keep the f away from me’. I guess I will feel better when I am vaccinated but being double vaccinated is still a way off for me. I definitely won’t be going to that soft play place where the under 5 section is right at the back of (what feels like) an unventilated warehouse and people weren’t wearing their masks properly a month+ ago. I’m currently fuming about the government’s decision to tell the general public to do what they think is best. I was 8 months pregnant with people walking right next to me a year ago. I was in hospital for 4 days with no visitors, and not long afterwards people were partying in a square and throwing fireworks. Meh. I have little faith in the English public. Soz.

#IHaveStartedToTakeBForWalksAtSevenInTheMorningInsteadOfGoingOutAfterTheSchoolsHaveFinishedForTheDay

I am always feeling so meh in the morning and it’s generally quite quiet apart from dog walkers (we’ve seen a couple of familiar faces the last couple of days which has been nice). I used to take her out when the kids were leaving school just due to her nap times, but the playground is too crowded these days and we don’t talk to anyone so what’s the point? Instead I try to cook dinner before I feel too sick. Fun times.

10 weeks pregnant with B comparison:

Self-portrait showing the bandage on my left arm where I had a blood test. My right hand is under my chin and I am pulling a piece of my hair.
Bloody Blood Tests (10 Weeks)
 
#WhatAWasteOfTime
#LuckilyTiagoCouldDropMeOffAndPickMeUpOrItWouldHaveTakenUpMoreOfMyMorningThanItAlreadyDid
#WeGotToTheHospitalEarlyAndDroveRoundTheWholeMultistoryCarParkAndCouldNotGetASpace
#AnnoyinglyThereWereAFewCarsInFrontOfUsAndWeWatchedThemGetTheLastSpaces
#InTheEndIGotOutOfTheCarAndLeftTiagoToTryToFindASpace
#HeDidNotSoHeWentToAShop
#ICouldNotFindTheRightBuilding
#KeptLookingAtMaps
#NoneOfTheSignsSaidTheBuildingINeeded
#InTheEndIHadToUseGoogleMaps
#IFinallyFoundIt
#WaitingAroundButIDidNotSignInSoIWasLikeHowDoTheyKnowIAmHere
#WentBackToReceptionAndTheySaidToJustGoIn
#StoodByTheDoorAndThePersonCameOver
#WentInAndShowedHerMyFolderAndSheSaidAreYouHavingScreenings
#Yes
#SoWhyDidSheMakeYouComeHereAsAtYourNextScanTheyWillDoBloodTests
#SheWasSoAnnoyed
#ThenIWasAnnoyedAsItWasAWasteOfTimeForUsAll
#LuckilyMyBloodCameOutThisTime
#NotThatItWouldHaveMattered
#IHadEatenAndDrankEnoughAndExercisedAndItWasNotSoEarlyInTheMorning
#AnnoyedForTiagoWastingHisTimeAndForMe
#LuckilyTodayWasADayForMyOwnStuffSoIJustWastedMyOwnTime
#ButIHaveSoMuchThatIWantToGetDone
#WasAWasteOfEveryonesTimeAndResources
#IAmLuckyAsItWasFreeForMe
#ButItIsWastingEveryonesMoney
#SoAnnoyed
#SoWillHaveBloodTakenAgainInLessThanAMonthsTime

I avoided this mess this time by having my first blood test at 13 weeks. This was due to covid and my inital appointment being over the phone (see last post).

I’ve also learned from these experiences and to have eaten food and be well hydrated for appointments.


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Categories
Pregnancy Waiting II

General Documenting Pregnancy Shoot (9 Weeks? / 28th June 2021)

Self-portrait of me looking at the camera in a bra and leggings. I am holding onto my elbow, and there is a bit of a baby bump showing.
General Documenting Pregnancy Shoot (9 Weeks? / 28th June 2021)
 
#TypicallyIGotAnAppointmentLetterForAScanTheSameDayThatISaidIHadHeardNothing
#AnnoyinglyItIsTheOneDayThatTiagoCanNotDoForSureSoWeWillHaveToWaitAnotherWeekNow
#TheLetterDoesNotSayIfTiagoCanAttendOrNotButIGuessTheRulesMayChangeByThenAnyways
#IRealiseThatIThoughtIMayBePregnantAsIGotSomeSpotsButTheyMayHaveBeenCausedByMeWearingAMask
#ThoughPerhapsItIsACombinationOfHormonesAndAMaskMakingThemWorseThanNormal
#IFeelHappierLatelyWhichIsProbablyAlsoACombinationOfHormonesAndHavingSomethingToCountdownToAfterMonthsOfFeelingABitLost
#ItHasAlsoBeenGoodToSeeMorePeopleLately
#WeJustHadAFewNightsAwayWhereWeCaughtUpWithLotsOfPeople
#ItWasReallyNiceToJustSeePeopleRegularlyForAFewDays
#ItWasAlsoAGlimpseOfHowItMightBeHavingTwoKids
#BDoesLikeBabiesButSheAlsoLikesToRunAroundAfterBiggerKids
#SheWasQuiteConfidentAtTakingTheirStuffAndDidNotSeemToCareWhenTheyGotAnnoyed
#ItWasAlsoAGoodReminderThatTheSecondKidWillNotDoVeryMuchForAWhile
#SoAtLeastYouCanPutThemDownAndFindThemThereAgainTenSecondsLater
#IAmJustNotLookingForwardToTheConstantFeedingAndNappyChangingAgain
#IHopeBreastfeedingWillBeEasierNextTimeButWeWillHaveToWaitAndSee
#WeTriedToExperimentWithTheLengthOfBsNapsAndHerBedtimeButSheStillWokeUpEarlierThanWeWanted
#WeSharedARoomWithHerSoItProbablyDidNotHelpEncourageHerToFallBackToSleep
#YesterdaySheSleptForAnHourAndAHalfInTheCarThenWentToBedAtSevenFortyFiveAndSheWokeUpAtFiveThirtyToday
#WeHadBeenTryingCuttingHerSecondNapToThirtyMinutesAndPuttingHerToBedAtEightAndSheWasWakingUpAtFive
#SoSheCanJustKeepHavingAnHourNapAtHerSecondNapAndGoToBedAtSevenThirty
#IGuessWeAreLuckyThatAtLeastSheSleepsQuiteSolidlyForAGoodAmountOfTime
#SheSeemsToKnowHerNapAndBedtimeRoutinesNowAndSheEitherClingsToTheSideOfHerCotOrLiesDownNextToItAsITryToGetHerReady
#YesterdayTiagoLookedAfterBAndIWentBackToSleep
#IDreamtThatWeWereAwayAndWeSaidYesToBGoingSwimmingInASmallFountain
#ItThenTurnedOutToBeAMassiveSwimmingPoolAndICouldNotSeeBAndAllTheKidsWereInTheSameCostumesWithTheSameFloats
#IStartedToShoutHadAnyoneSeenHer
#IThenWokeMyselfUpAsIDidNotWantToDealWithTheStress
#IToldTiagoAndHeSaidDoYouKnowThatYouOftenWakeUpInTheMiddleOfTheNightAndLookForB
#YesIDo

I’m yet to do a shoot, but I’ve called it General Documenting Pregnancy Shoot for now as I want to experiment a bit today and not pretend to be a one year old for once.

(3rd September 2021: I have a habit of doing shoots just after eating, so I look a bit more pregnant than I was. I’ve already copied this shoot once, and I plan to do it at least a few more times during the pregnancy.)

#TypicallyIGotAnAppointmentLetterForAScanTheSameDayThatISaidIHadHeardNothing

It’s always the way.

#AnnoyinglyItIsTheOneDayThatTiagoCanNotDoForSureSoWeWillHaveToWaitAnotherWeekNow

What’s another week? I’m impatient though.

#TheLetterDoesNotSayIfTiagoCanAttendOrNotButIGuessTheRulesMayChangeByThenAnyways

I was going to ask, but then I didn’t. The woman on the phone did say that the letter has a lot of incorrect and missing information on it though. I knew that as the line said it was open until 5, but it closed at 2:30 and I initially called at 2:50 to change my appointment so I had to wait until the next day. Fun times.

#IRealiseThatIThoughtIMayBePregnantAsIGotSomeSpotsButTheyMayHaveBeenCausedByMeWearingAMask

I’m sure I mentioned this in a previous set of hashtags. I don’t really get spots that often – unless I have been eating a lot of bad foods. I was reading something the other day and then I thought ‘ah yeah maybe the spots are more due to wearing a mask?’

#ThoughPerhapsItIsACombinationOfHormonesAndAMaskMakingThemWorseThanNormal

I guess I wear a mask for the same amount of time each week, so it must have been a combination of both? I have some really bad ones on the right side of my face right now.

#IFeelHappierLatelyWhichIsProbablyAlsoACombinationOfHormonesAndHavingSomethingToCountdownToAfterMonthsOfFeelingABitLost

If I could bottle these hormones (but not have morning sickness all the time) I’d take them for life, but I guess when I was pregnant with B I had also been feeling lost previously too.

#ItHasAlsoBeenGoodToSeeMorePeopleLately

Seeing people that I have not seen for a year or two or more…

#WeJustHadAFewNightsAwayWhereWeCaughtUpWithLotsOfPeople

Three couples and their kids (they all have two kids each).

#ItWasReallyNiceToJustSeePeopleRegularlyForAFewDays

People to hang out with while we watched the kids and passed time quite nicely. Hurrah. Luckily the weather was nice!

#ItWasAlsoAGlimpseOfHowItMightBeHavingTwoKids

They varied in age from 11 weeks to 9 years.

#BDoesLikeBabiesButSheAlsoLikesToRunAroundAfterBiggerKids

She is intrigued by babies, but she also likes to follow older kids.

#SheWasQuiteConfidentAtTakingTheirStuffAndDidNotSeemToCareWhenTheyGotAnnoyed

The determination/nonchalance on her face…

#ItWasAlsoAGoodReminderThatTheSecondKidWillNotDoVeryMuchForAWhile

I had kind of forgotten how babies are. I guess I am the most concerned about all the night feedings, and B going down to one nap very soon.

#SoAtLeastYouCanPutThemDownAndFindThemThereAgainTenSecondsLater

I forget that they are quite happy just lying on a mat, looking at the ceiling or toys etc.

#IAmJustNotLookingForwardToTheConstantFeedingAndNappyChangingAgain

It is going to be a juggle, but it will be worth it in the end.

#IHopeBreastfeedingWillBeEasierNextTimeButWeWillHaveToWaitAndSee

I feel like I have forgotten everything already, but I’m sure some things will come back to me.

#WeTriedToExperimentWithTheLengthOfBsNapsAndHerBedtimeButSheStillWokeUpEarlierThanWeWanted

Great.

#WeSharedARoomWithHerSoItProbablyDidNotHelpEncourageHerToFallBackToSleep

It is easier to try to let her go back to sleep when you’re not there next to her. She slept better than I thought she would though with the shared room situation. We just tried to only go in the room when we wanted to go to sleep. Sometimes she woke up, but she quickly went back to sleep.

#YesterdaySheSleptForAnHourAndAHalfInTheCarThenWentToBedAtSevenFortyFiveAndSheWokeUpAtFiveThirtyToday

On the way there she was just awake the whole time when I wanted to sleep. Yesterday we both napped. Poor Tiago…

#WeHadBeenTryingCuttingHerSecondNapToThirtyMinutesAndPuttingHerToBedAtEightAndSheWasWakingUpAtFive #SoSheCanJustKeepHavingAnHourNapAtHerSecondNapAndGoToBedAtSevenThirty

I was relieved as I like for her to have more than half an hour so I can get things done. I probably need to try cutting her nap to 30 minutes then putting her to bed earlier, but I feel like she just likes to wake up between 5 and 5:40.

#IGuessWeAreLuckyThatAtLeastSheSleepsQuiteSolidlyForAGoodAmountOfTime

We just need to go to bed earlier. The last two nights we have been watching football (Euros). I like football, but not that much football. I could have gone to bed at 8pm last night easily, but oh well. Portugal are out now, but Tiago is suddenly more interested in England.

#SheSeemsToKnowHerNapAndBedtimeRoutinesNowAndSheEitherClingsToTheSideOfHerCotOrLiesDownNextToItAsITryToGetHerReady

Well, this was just while we were away. I would just be sorting something out and she would be there clinging to it or next to it. It’s good though.

#YesterdayTiagoLookedAfterBAndIWentBackToSleep

Thanks Tiago.

#IDreamtThatWeWereAwayAndWeSaidYesToBGoingSwimmingInASmallFountain #ItThenTurnedOutToBeAMassiveSwimmingPoolAndICouldNotSeeBAndAllTheKidsWereInTheSameCostumesWithTheSameFloats #IStartedToShoutHadAnyoneSeenHer #IThenWokeMyselfUpAsIDidNotWantToDealWithTheStress

I realised it was a dream/nightmare, so there was no way I was going to stay there getting stressed out within it.

#IToldTiagoAndHeSaidDoYouKnowThatYouOftenWakeUpInTheMiddleOfTheNightAndLookForB #YesIDo

I still have dreams where I think she has fallen out of our bed or is out of her cot or something. Oh the fun. I’m going to try to have a quick lie down now before she wakes up. Hopefully she will sleep for another hour, but sometimes she wakes up earlier. She is teething again, and her skin is itchy again though it looks normal. Fun timessss.

8 weeks pregnant with B comparison:

(I should have posted these in the last post, but oh well. I only did one shoot for 8 weeks, but I don’t want to miss them out.)

I have a long necked top on that is covering the bottom of my nose. My hair is hanging long down one side. I am dressed in dark clothing.
Day Before Haircut (8 Weeks)
 
#IAmSoBoredOfTheWinterAlready
#ITryToWashMyHairEvery5DaysIfICan
#IDreadWashingIt
#WellNotTheWashingItSoMuchButMoreTheDryingIt
#AndComingOutOfTheShowerWithALotOfWetHair
#IHaveBeenTryingToSeeHowLongICanGrowItForPhotographicPurposes
#ButIAmTooLowMaintenanceForThis
#ThereIsJustTooMuchHairToDry
#InTheSummerItIsNotTooBadAndItIsABitRefreshing
#ButHavingToPutTheHeaterOnBecauseMyHairIsTooAnnoying
#AndSpendingAgesBlowDryingIt
#Nah
#EspeciallyNowThatIAmPregnantIJustReallyCanNotBeBothered
#IFeelLikeIWillEndUpCuttingItOffSoonAnyways
#SoMightAsWellDoItNowAndSaveMyselfALotOfTimeOverTheWinter
#LetsSeeThough
#AsOftenITalkAboutCuttingItShorter
#ButMyHairdresserDoesNotWantMeToDislikeItAfter
#ItWillNotBeSuperSuperShort
#AsIWantToBeAbleToTieItBackStill
#ButThatWillBeABigImprovementIThink
#MyHairMightBeKeepingMeABitWarmAtTheMoment
#ButICanWearAHat
#SayingMyHairdresserSoundsFunny
#ButIHaveBeenGoingToTheSamePlaceForYEARS
#ThereHaveBeenPhasesWhereIHaveNot
#ButILikeToCatchUpWithEveryoneThere
#AndIUsedToBeSoAwkwardAndSitInSilence
#AndAvoidLookingAtMyselfInTheMirror
#MyHairdresserAndILaughAboutHowAwkwardIUsedToBeAllTheTime

I recently had my hair cut off, but I was not at the same stage of pregnancy.

I cut it off due to wanting it to be lower maintenance and because it is harder to bend over the bath to wash my hair – my preferred way to do it, but I did not have that option when I was pregnant with B due to the bathroom set-up.

I can not really wear it down now as it gets so frizzy/wild, so I usually just tie up the top bit of it in a messy bun.

I now live close to my hairdressers again, so I’m going to the same place…

I am wearing a striped top and my arms are wrapped around me. I am looking at the camera.
Day After Haircut (8 Weeks)

#NotMuchToSayIThink
#GotAHaircut
#ItWasTooMuchHassleHavingLongHair
#MyHairdresserStraightenedItAndWhatever
#SoNotSureHowItWillLookWhenIHaveWashedAndBlowDriedItMyself
#ProbablyALotFluffier
#IWantedItLongEnoughToTieBack
#ButItIsAtALengthWhereIHaveToUseStrongTiesAsOtherwiseItFallsOut
#ItWillBeFine
#IDoNotLikeHowJustCutHairLooksOnMe
#TheEndsAreTooSharp
#ButIGuessItIsAlsoBecauseItIsStraight
#ButOftenIDoNotLikeHowTiagosHairLooksAfterHeHasJustHadItCut
#AfterAFewDaysItSeemsBetterButAlsoMaybeIJustGetUsedToIt
#FeelingABitSickNow
#BoredOfThisSickBusiness
#ILookPregnantHereButIAmJustBloated
#AndThisIsWhyIDoNotLikeTightTops
#ButISomehowDecidedToBuySomeTopsLikeThis
#ToBeFairTheyWereInAPacketAndIThoughtTheyWereLooserLikeOtherOnesIHave
#FunTimes
#GoingToGoSoakMyFeetAsIFeelLikeTheyNeedSomeLove
#ThenReadMyBookAboutTheSpiceGirls

I love how I say I look pregnant when I clearly don’t…

I have been caring less about what I wear as I am usually at home.

9 weeks pregnant with B comparison:

Self-portrait holding my NHS-issued pregnancy book. I look sad and have my arms crossed over the folder.
Bleeding Worry (9 Weeks)
 
#SoLastNightThingsFeltABitFunny
#AndIWasFeelingTooScaredToGoToTheBathroom
#AfterAWhileIWentAsIWantedToBrushMyTeeth
#AndThereWasBlood
#NotLoadsButMoreThanIHaveBledSoFarAndAReallyIntenseColour
#IWasHavingCramps
#IStillHaveSomeCrampsAndWeirdFeelings
#ItCouldBeAFewThings
#HadABusyWeekWhichIsWhyIDecidedThatINeededToStayInAndRestLastNight
#YesterdayIAccidentallyJabbedMyselfInTheStomachWithMyPhoneInMyPocket
#IAteSomethingFromAJarThatWas3WeeksOutOfDate
#ThatIsAwkwardToAdmitButItWasVegetablesAndIHadJustOpenedIt
#IUsedALotOfMoisturiserOnMyBodyWhenIUsuallyRarelyUseAny
#IFeelLikeThereWasSomethingElseButICanNotRemember
#ItCouldAllBeFineButIAmExpectingTheWorst
#LuckilyIHaveAnAppointmentForThisAfternoonAtTheHospital
#MyLeafletSaidToCallIfIHaveAnyBleedingOrPain
#AsThoughItIsNotUncommonItNeedsToBeCheckedOut
#CalledTheNumberAndOption1WasEmergency
#IFeltAwkwardPressing1SoIPressedForAllOtherEnquiriesAndThenShePutMeThroughToTheEmergencyLine
#ItIsInAFewHoursButThisMorningIsDraggingSoMuch
#IWasNotSickToday
#MyBoobsAreNotSore
#MyNoseDoesNotFeelFull
#FeelsLikeMostOfMySymptomsHaveGone
#WeCanOnlyWaitAndSee
#LastNightIJustCriedInTiagosArms
#InThePhotoIAmHoldingMyFolderOfNotesThatINeedToTakeToEveryAppointment
#DuringTheShootItFeltLikeSomethingWasJabbingMe
#IDoNotKnowWhatNormalIsSupposedToFeelLikeWhenPregnant

Luckily I have not had a scare like this yet this pregnancy. I’ve been getting bad cramps, which seem stronger than when I was pregnant with B but maybe I’ve just forgotten how things are.

B’s been accidentally kicking and punching me in my stomach loads.

My folder of notes is just a tiny booklet instead this time. Birmingham seems to use an app for all my notes?

I still feel like I do not know what normal is when pregnant, and I get anxious at times, but I just have to take some deep breaths and hope that everything will go the same as last time. I am just hoping that this baby will come out head first this time…


Thanks for reading! If you’re enjoying my blog (and/or the work I make) please consider supporting me by ‘buying me a coffee’ on Ko-fi – thanks!

Categories
Pregnancy Waiting II

Imitating B Looking At The Ceiling (8 Weeks? / 23rd June 2021)

Self-portrait on the floor. My elbows and arms are supporting me and I'm looking up to the ceiling.
Failing At Imitating How B Looks At The Ceiling (8 Weeks? / 23rd June 2021)
 
#SometimesBLeansBackAtStaresAtTheCeilingWhileInHerHighchair
#AtOneOfHerBabyClassesSheWillJustLeanBackAndLookAtTimes
#ThoughThereIsADiscoBallHangingDownButIAmNotSureIfSheHasActuallyNoticedIt
#SheHasHerThirdToothComingThroughWhichIsHerFirstInHerTopGum
#SheIsGettingMoreConfidentWithTakingStepsAndItWillNotBeLongBeforeSheIsReallyWalking
#WeNeedToGetHerSomeProperShoes
#WeHaveResignedOurselvesToTheFactThatSheJustWakesUpAtFiveFortyEveryDayNow
#IOnlyNoticedTheOtherDayHowItIsSoLightSoLateAtNightButNowItWillStartToGoTheOtherWay
#IWonderWhenOrIfSheWillStartToSleepInABitLater
#IAttendedAnOnlineClassAboutFeedingToddlersSoIKnowABitMoreNowAboutWhatSheNeedsToEatAtEveryMeal
#CookingIsDifficultAtTheMomentAsIGenerallyFeelSickWhenDoingItButINeedToPullMyWeightMore
#IHaveStartedToBeSickMoreRegularlySinceMyLastEntry
#YesterdayIHadTheDentalHygienistAndIWasReallyWorriedThatIWouldBeSickAtMyAppointment
#IWasGettingReadyAndWasAboutToBrushMyTeethWhenIWasSick
#BetterThatItWasBeforeThanDuringButIWasWorriedThatISmelledOfSick
#IWasRelievedToWalkIntoTheAppointmentAndSeeItWasTwoWomen
#IFeltLessAwkwardAboutSayingSorryIShouldWarnYouButIHaveBadMorningSickness
#IHadThoughtAboutCancellingTheAppointmentButIReadThatDentalHygieneIsReallyImportantWhenYouArePregnant
#IFeelLikeIShouldBeMorePregnantThanEightWeeksByNowAndMaybeIAmOrMaybeIAmNot
#IAmYetToHearAnythingAboutAnAppointmentSoIJustHaveToWaitAndSee
#IHaveBeenGettingTheChillsALotLatelyWhichIDoNotRememberHavingWithB
#IResearchedAboutItAndApparentlyItIsCommonAsYourHormonesAreAllOverThePlace
#MyNanLikesToPutTheHeatingOnHighSoTheChangeInTemperatureProbablyDoesNotHelp
#WeHaveStartedToSeeMorePeopleLatelyWhichIsReallyNice
#AFriendCameToSpendTheDayAndItWasReliefAsTheWeekDaysAreSoLong
#WeWillSpendTheWeekendWithSomeFriendsAndTheirKidsThisWeekendSoIAmLookingForwardToThat
#ItIsWeirdHowBIsOneAndSheIsStillYetToMeetSoManyPeople
#IHopeThatSheWillMeetMorePeopleBeforeSheHasASiblingSoSheDoesNotHaveToShareTheAttentionButItIsWhatItIs
#IWasThinkingThisMorningThatItIsWeirdThatWeMayHaveAnotherChildInSevenMonthsTime
#IKnowIAmPregnantAndWhatThatMeansButIStillDoNotReallyEquateItWithUsBeingAFamilyOfFourYet

(30th August 2021: I failed as being pregnant I couldn’t completely replicate how she does it. It’s more leaning back from a seated position, but I thought I better be careful. It was a hot day, so I wore less than I originally intended to.)

#SometimesBLeansBackAtStaresAtTheCeilingWhileInHerHighchair

I made a note of this in my ‘pictures to take’ memo 3 weeks ago.

#AtOneOfHerBabyClassesSheWillJustLeanBackAndLookAtTimes

She did it at the last class.

#ThoughThereIsADiscoBallHangingDownButIAmNotSureIfSheHasActuallyNoticedIt

I like to try to see what she is looking at. At my Nan’s house she does have some nice patterns in the paint on the ceiling, but I guess she is just taking in all of her environment.

#SheHasHerThirdToothComingThroughWhichIsHerFirstInHerTopGum

I thought I saw something a few days ago but thought it was just saliva, but then I realised the day after that it was the start of a tooth.

#SheIsGettingMoreConfidentWithTakingStepsAndItWillNotBeLongBeforeSheIsReallyWalking

I wrote the hashtags while B played with her toys, which is the first time I’ve wrote and she’s played. As I was thinking what to write B walked from the table to an activity table that my Nan got for her.

#WeNeedToGetHerSomeProperShoes

We have some shoes, but I can not even get them on her feet. Last time I did they cut her heel a bit, so yeah she needs shoes. I need to find somewhere to get her measured…

#WeHaveResignedOurselvesToTheFactThatSheJustWakesUpAtFiveFortyEveryDayNow

The other night it was 11pm and I was struggling to sleep. I knew I would regret it, but actually yesterday I didn’t have a nap and felt okay. I went to nap during her first nap, but she woke up as soon as I pulled my eye mask on and lay my head down (I had been doing some work first).

I am writing this blog post while B is having a nap. I don’t feel particularly tired, but I will at least lie down and have a rest.

#IOnlyNoticedTheOtherDayHowItIsSoLightSoLateAtNightButNowItWillStartToGoTheOtherWay

It was the 20th June and I was like ‘ooh it’s 10pm and it’s still light! Oh yeah tomorrow is the longest day of the year…’

#IWonderWhenOrIfSheWillStartToSleepInABitLater

I think we have to keep acting like she will never sleep in late again so we don’t go to bed too late. At the moment T and I are having a nice chat before we go to sleep, which sounds basic but we didn’t have time for it for a while. It’s important.

#IAttendedAnOnlineClassAboutFeedingToddlersSoIKnowABitMoreNowAboutWhatSheNeedsToEatAtEveryMeal

Carbs at every meal/snack. More energy dense foods. Okay.

#CookingIsDifficultAtTheMomentAsIGenerallyFeelSickWhenDoingItButINeedToPullMyWeightMore

I managed to make a mushroom and leek pie while B crawled around me yesterday. Though T helped with the puff pastry, but it felt good to contribute as I have been so rubbish lately.

#IHaveStartedToBeSickMoreRegularlySinceMyLastEntry

I was sick after finishing my last post.

#YesterdayIHadTheDentalHygienistAndIWasReallyWorriedThatIWouldBeSickAtMyAppointment

I was really anxious about it.

#IWasGettingReadyAndWasAboutToBrushMyTeethWhenIWasSick

I was a bit relieved.

#BetterThatItWasBeforeThanDuringButIWasWorriedThatISmelledOfSick

I arrived just on time, though someone beat me to reception so it seemed like I was late. I had been trying to make sure I didn’t smell of sick.

#IWasRelievedToWalkIntoTheAppointmentAndSeeItWasTwoWomen #IFeltLessAwkwardAboutSayingSorryIShouldWarnYouButIHaveBadMorningSickness

If there had been two guys I would have said it, but I would have felt more awkward for sure.

#IHadThoughtAboutCancellingTheAppointmentButIReadThatDentalHygieneIsReallyImportantWhenYouArePregnant

Your gums bleed more, which might be why when I went to have a tooth out my gums might have been bleeding a lot when they were checking me over beforehand. I had that tooth removed as ibruprofen was the only thing that helped and I knew that you’re not really supposed to take ibruprofen when you’re pregnant. I didn’t want the pain to get worse and then have a tooth out when I was possibly heavily pregnant. It was a good job that I had it out when I did.

#IFeelLikeIShouldBeMorePregnantThanEightWeeksByNowAndMaybeIAmOrMaybeIAmNot

Time moves in weird ways. Sometimes I look quite pregnant, but it’s more of a food baby I think.

#IAmYetToHearAnythingAboutAnAppointmentSoIJustHaveToWaitAndSee

I did miss a call from a mobile number last week. They never left a message though so it probably was just spam.

#IHaveBeenGettingTheChillsALotLatelyWhichIDoNotRememberHavingWithB

I’ll go really cold. Put my jacket on. Then I’m hot in a few minutes.

#IResearchedAboutItAndApparentlyItIsCommonAsYourHormonesAreAllOverThePlace

Great.

#MyNanLikesToPutTheHeatingOnHighSoTheChangeInTemperatureProbablyDoesNotHelp

Heating on maximum. Turn it down. Sun comes out. Etc etc.

#WeHaveStartedToSeeMorePeopleLatelyWhichIsReallyNice

After so long without seeing many people at all.

#AFriendCameToSpendTheDayAndItWasReliefAsTheWeekDaysAreSoLong

It was so nice to hang out and have someone else giving B attention. We all had a nap when B had her second nap. I was glad that she didn’t mind me going off to sleep and she said she fell asleep too.

#WeWillSpendTheWeekendWithSomeFriendsAndTheirKidsThisWeekendSoIAmLookingForwardToThat

We went away with them a few years ago and we were the only couple who did not have kids. There were 4 kids then and now there are 7. If this pregnancy goes well then we will all have 2 kids each.

#ItIsWeirdHowBIsOneAndSheIsStillYetToMeetSoManyPeople

*Shrug* What can we do?

#IHopeThatSheWillMeetMorePeopleBeforeSheHasASiblingSoSheDoesNotHaveToShareTheAttentionButItIsWhatItIs

I know a lot of people will not see me until I potentially have two kids and that might be weird for them to see. I keep saying potentially as I am still nervous about things as it is early days. Morning sickness is meant to be a good sign, but it is never concrete.

#IWasThinkingThisMorningThatItIsWeirdThatWeMayHaveAnotherChildInSevenMonthsTime #IKnowIAmPregnantAndWhatThatMeansButIStillDoNotReallyEquateItWithUsBeingAFamilyOfFourYet

I guess things will be more real when we have a scan or an appointment. At the moment I am finding it hard to get my head around, I think so much of my time is focused on B that in ways I probably do not think about it all as much as when I was pregnant with her.

Fingers crossed for it all. Time to have a lie down. I’m feeling sleepier now…

8 weeks pregnant with B comparison:

Self-portrait. Sat in bed with the bedsheet and duvet pulled up around me, and holding my hands to my elbows. I'm looking straight at the camera and look a bit tired.
I Worry That People Will Think I Am Drunk Or Hungover If I Am Sick In The Street (8 Weeks)

#8Weeks
#ThatMeansIHaveKnownForNearly4WeeksNow
#ItIsSoWeird
#IThinkIAmGettingALittleLessFreakedOutNow
#ThoughCrampsAndStuffOccasionallyDoMakeMeWinceAndWorry
#ThenIRememberHowOftenIHaveExperiencedThem
#TheSicknessThingIsAlreadyGettingOld
#IHaveBeenFeelingMoreSickInTheEvenings
#IDoNotMindBeingSickInTheMorningSoMuchAsIHaveNotEatenYetAndNowIJustTryToDrinkWaterBeforeEightThirty
#OnceIAmSickInTheMorningIFeelFineAndNowItIsBecomingWeirdlyReassuring
#LikeOkayIMustStillBePregnantAsMyBodyIsDoingThatSickThing
#IJustDoNotWantToGetCaughtOutAndBeSickOutsideOfOurFlat
#IWorryThatPeopleWillThinkIAmDrunkOrHungoverIfIAmSickInTheStreet
#BeingSickOnATrainIsMyMainWorry
#IBoughtSomeProperSickBagsYesterday
#ButINeedToJustCarryOneAroundWithMe
#LikeAReallyCoolKid
#RegisteredForTheDentistToday
#TheyWereLikeDoYouPay
#ISaidIUsuallyDoButIAmPregnantAtTheMoment
#AtTheMomentSeemsToBeSomethingThatISayALot
#IAmStillCautious
#IToldOneMorePersonThisWeekThatIAmPregnant
#BecauseIFeltSoSickAndWeWereGoingToMeetTiagoAndHisFriendAndIThoughtTiagosFriendWouldSayCongratsWhenHeSawMeWhichHeDid
#IUnderstandTheNotTellingLotsOfPeopleButIfItIsToProtectMeThenItIsMoreAwkwardNotTalkingAboutThingsThanTalkingAboutThem
#AwkwardAsInKeepingSecretsAndKeepingThoughtsBackFromPeople
#TalkingToPeopleSayingThatIAmMakingWorkAboutTryingToGetPregnant
#WhichIWasDoingButNowIAmPregnantSoICanNotBeTrueAboutWhatIAmWorkingOnAtTheMoment
#IAmSeeingSomeFriendsNextWeekSoIAmGuessingIWillTellThemThenAsOtherwiseIMightNotSeeThemFaceToFaceAgainForAWhileAndSeeingPeoplesReactionsIsMostOfTheFun 
#WhenWeWereEngagedIOnlyToldPeopleFaceToFaceBeforeWeActuallyGotMarried

I am 8 weeks pregnant in the new image, though it hadn’t been confirmed yet. Cramps still make me worry. With B I was usually sick more in the mornings, but with baby X I was sick more in the evenings. I was never actually sick in public with B, but I was sick in front of people last week, which wasn’t very nice…

This time I wasn’t really travelling about because of B and Covid (I’ve only been on a train two or three times for short journeys since she was born), so I’ve hopefully missed that phase this time.

I also told more people via messages that I was pregnant this time before I announced it as I knew I would not see many people in person before hand.

But morning sickness is and was HORRIBLE. Some things don’t change…


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Oh Me, Oh Pai Pregnancy Waiting II

Tiago’s Second British Father’s Day (7 Weeks? / 20th June 2021)

Tiago sat on a beanbag with B on his lap. He is looking down at her, while her face has been covered with duplicates of Tiago's thumb.
Tiago’s Second British Father’s Day (7 Weeks? / 20th June 2021)
 
#IAskedTiagoAboutHowHeFeelsAboutBeingADadTheseDaysAndHeJustSaidGood
#AfterSomeMoreDiggingHeSaidThatHeNowUnderstandsHisPlaceInTheWorldAsAHumanMore
#IGuessBWillNotBeAsStillForTheShootAsSheWasAYearAgo
#SheWasBarelyAWeekOldWhenItWasTiagosFirstFathersDay
#NowSheIsJustOnTheMoveSoMuchAndSheIsStartingToTakeMultipleSteps
#TheOtherDaySheDidAboutSixAsSheConcentratedOnMyPhoneAsIMovedIt
#YesterdaySheWalkedFromTheKitchenIntoTheLivingRoomWithoutAnyPrompt
#TheOtherDayInHerBabyClassThereWereSomeBigFakeDogsThatTheTeachersBroughtRound
#BRanOffAndSheWouldNotTouchAnyOfTheOtherToys
#SheIsTheOldestByFarNowAndSoonSheWillSoonBeTooOldForTheClass
#SheWasRandomlyHuggingTheWomanNextToUsWhoWeHadNotSpokenTo
#HerSleepHasGotWorseButICheckedAndSheIsGoingThroughALeap
#SheAlsoHadHerOneYearVaccinationsThisWeek
#IWasSayingToSomeoneThatAtLeastThereAreNotSevenJabsButThereWereFour
#TwoInEachLegAndIFeltSoBadForBWhoWasObviouslyUpset
#TheNurseWasSayingThereUsedToBeThreeAt12MonthsThenOneOneMonthLater
#ButPeopleWereJustNotTurningUpForTheSecondAppointmentOrTheKidsWouldRememberTheNeedleAndBeScared
#YesterdayBWasAwakeLoadsDuringTheNightButPrettyMuchAwakeFromFourThirty
#SheAteAllHerBreakfastAtSixSoSheMustHaveBeenHungry
#IStillFeelABitThrownOffFromUsChangingFromFormulaToMilkButTheMainDifferenceWasIDidNotGiveHerYoghurtForDessertTheNightBefore
#SheUsuallyEatsQuiteABitOfItAndIGuessItHelpsFillHerUp
#TodaySheWokeUpAtTheSameTimeButIPutTheHeatingOnAndSheSleptABitMore
#WeHaveJustKindOfAcceptedThatWeWillBeAwakeFromFiveThirtyEverydayNow
#IHaveBeenSoTiredThatIHaveBeenAsleepByTenTheLastCoupleOfNights
#MySicknessComesAndGoesAndIHaveOnlyBeenActuallySickTwoTimes
#TwoOtherTimesIWentToBeSickButNothingCameUp
#IHaveBeenEatingALotOfCheeseAndTomatoSandwiches
#TheOtherNightIHadAReallyStrongCravingForRiceAndMangoChutney
#IFeelABitNervousAboutItAllButHopefullyEverythingWillBeOkay
#IDoNotThinkThereWillEverBeAGoodTimeToHaveASecondKidSoWeWillJustHaveToDoOurBest

#IAskedTiagoAboutHowHeFeelsAboutBeingADadTheseDaysAndHeJustSaidGood

This is why I’ve stopped asking him for comments for these things.

#AfterSomeMoreDiggingHeSaidThatHeNowUnderstandsHisPlaceInTheWorldAsAHumanMore

As the shoot is about his second Father’s Day I thought I needed to at least get something else out of him.

He’s a great Dad. It’s currently 06:38 and he’s up sorting out B’s breakfast, while I’m writing this. I did start writing before 6am but B went back to sleep for 10 minutes…

#IGuessBWillNotBeAsStillForTheShootAsSheWasAYearAgo #SheWasBarelyAWeekOldWhenItWasTiagosFirstFathersDay

Oh, what a year.

#NowSheIsJustOnTheMoveSoMuchAndSheIsStartingToTakeMultipleSteps

She.Does.Not.Sit.Still. A friend came to visit yesterday and we were sat outside with her just pushing her walker up and down.

#TheOtherDaySheDidAboutSixAsSheConcentratedOnMyPhoneAsIMovedIt

She was stood up and she was looking at my phone, so I just held it at her grabbing height and kept moving it. We were sat behind the sofa so Nan and T missed it.

#YesterdaySheWalkedFromTheKitchenIntoTheLivingRoomWithoutAnyPrompt

I was glad that Nan and Tiago saw it. Both times were early evening-ish, so her legs must have enough strength by then.

#TheOtherDayInHerBabyClassThereWereSomeBigFakeDogsThatTheTeachersBroughtRound #BRanOffAndSheWouldNotTouchAnyOfTheOtherToys

I was shocked as I thought she would have grabbed them. I guess she is getting older and some safety defences are kicking in? The teachers were saying some kids just don’t like cuddly toys, but I was surprised. I think she was having a weird day as at home she wouldn’t go near her toys either.

#SheIsTheOldestByFarNowAndSoonSheWillSoonBeTooOldForTheClass

There was a baby I hadn’t noticed before who was starting to crawl, but it was their last week. It’s just B and a lot of kids half her age. She enjoys it though – besides being scared of stuffed animals.

#SheWasRandomlyHuggingTheWomanNextToUsWhoWeHadNotSpokenTo

She did keep looking at the woman’s baby, but then she just crawled off, gave her a hug, then tried to go in her handbag. Classic.

#HerSleepHasGotWorseButICheckedAndSheIsGoingThroughALeap

Great.

#SheAlsoHadHerOneYearVaccinationsThisWeek

Great great.

#IWasSayingToSomeoneThatAtLeastThereAreNotSevenJabsButThereWereFour

I thought it would be one injection for some reason.

#TwoInEachLegAndIFeltSoBadForBWhoWasObviouslyUpset

I had to try to hold her still. Her legs are a mess at the moment. She obviously tried to escape my grasp 🙁

A woman outside was saying she has twins and one watched the other one have their injections and he was off.

#TheNurseWasSayingThereUsedToBeThreeAt12MonthsThenOneOneMonthLater #ButPeopleWereJustNotTurningUpForTheSecondAppointmentOrTheKidsWouldRememberTheNeedleAndBeScared

I guess they didn’t want to overload them, but it’s easier just to get them all done on the same day. Good job my Mum comes round to visit as I think B is fine, but she says to give B paracetamol as she has a bit of a temperature. I don’t even notice so I feel bad.

#YesterdayBWasAwakeLoadsDuringTheNightButPrettyMuchAwakeFromFourThirty

Oh the joys. I tried putting the heating on but that didn’t work much.

#SheAteAllHerBreakfastAtSixSoSheMustHaveBeenHungry #IStillFeelABitThrownOffFromUsChangingFromFormulaToMilkButTheMainDifferenceWasIDidNotGiveHerYoghurtForDessertTheNightBefore #SheUsuallyEatsQuiteABitOfItAndIGuessItHelpsFillHerUp

I really need to look at her meals and change things up a bit. She does seem to be getting into her milk though, but it’s always a bit weird changing from one schedule to another. Soon it will be normal. I think her sleep isn’t helped by the leap and vaccinations…

#TodaySheWokeUpAtTheSameTimeButIPutTheHeatingOnAndSheSleptABitMore

Then she was awake from 5:30, but I went in and told her to go back to sleep. We need to be more strict with only getting her out of bed at 6. Sometimes we cave at 10 to 6. Today we were being strict and she actually fell asleep from 5:55 to 6:05. I had got my laptop out to start writing, but when she went quiet I quickly lay down again.

#WeHaveJustKindOfAcceptedThatWeWillBeAwakeFromFiveThirtyEverydayNow

Even if we don’t get her up until 6 she will be awake.

#IHaveBeenSoTiredThatIHaveBeenAsleepByTenTheLastCoupleOfNights

I seem to wake up around 4 by myself and feel quite awake, but I always want more sleep. If B gets up at 6 then we try to get her to nap from 9 to 11. Sometimes she sleeps all of it, sometimes she doesn’t. I will usually nap for most of it if I do not have much on.

#MySicknessComesAndGoesAndIHaveOnlyBeenActuallySickTwoTimes

Hurrah. I don’t want it to get worse. It’s bad enough as it is.

#TwoOtherTimesIWentToBeSickButNothingCameUp

I was relieved. I didn’t like feeling sick, so I wanted to feel better but I didn’t want to actually be sick. I gagged a couple of times and felt better. Great.

#IHaveBeenEatingALotOfCheeseAndTomatoSandwiches

Toast. Butter. Cheddar. A couple of cherry tomatoes. It seems to be enough to take the sickness away and to leave me feeling happy.

#TheOtherNightIHadAReallyStrongCravingForRiceAndMangoChutney

I don’t really like rice so that was fun/weird.

#IFeelABitNervousAboutItAllButHopefullyEverythingWillBeOkay

Last night I was going from hot to cold lots. I probably had sat outside for too long on a not very warm day.

#IDoNotThinkThereWillEverBeAGoodTimeToHaveASecondKidSoWeWillJustHaveToDoOurBest

I do worry about it, but I would rather have a second one now than leave it a few years. All we can do is our best and I’m sure it’ll all be okay.

Feeling sick now.

And then I was sick 10 minutes later…

7 weeks pregnant with B comparison:

Self-portrait with a piece of tissue wrapped around my finger.
(Dragon Fruit &) Cut To Finger (7 and a half weeks)
 
#SoInMyUlteriorMonologueProjectThereIsAPictureOfMyHandsHoldingADragonFruitWithABloodyFinger
#TheReasonWhyUlteriorMonologueIsCalledThatIsBecauseIWroteHashtagsLikeThese
#ButIDidNotAlwaysWriteWhatIAlwaysReallyWantedToWrite
#IAmWritingTheseHashtagsAWhileAfterITookThePhoto
#ThereIsNoDragonfruitInThisPicture
#ButThereIsTheCutFinger
#AndIThinkInMyEarlyPregnancyIHadAccidentsWithKnivesACoupleOfTimes
#AndThisWasTheWorstTime
#SoInTheHashtagsThatAccompanyTheDragonfruitPictureIfIHadFeltAbleToTalkAboutMyPregnancyIWouldHaveTalkedAboutBeingMoreClumsyThanNormal
#IThinkItWasJustBecauseMyBrainWasElsewhere
#WhichItShouldNotBeWhenIAmHoldingASharpKnife
#ThinkingAboutBeingPregnantAndNotBeingAbleToBelieveItProbably
#SoIHadStartedThisProjectButIWasStillWorkingOnUlteriorMonologueAsIDidNotWantToStopPostingStuff
#ButIRealisedThatINeededToTalkAboutBeingPregnant
#SoUlteriorMonologueReachedANaturalEnd
#ButIBoughtSomeTimeOnInstagramByPostingArchivePictures
#WhichIHadThoughtAboutDoingForAWhileButItGaveMeTheTimeToDoItAsILetMyPregnancyProgress
#IThinkItAnnoyedALotOfPeopleByJustPostingArchiveStuff
#ButIHaveSoMuchWorkThatIForgetIHaveHalfTheTime
#SoItWasNiceToGoThroughItAll
#ButItTookALongTimeToDo
#WhichIsWhatIWantedButByTheEndIWasBeyondDoneWithIt

It’s weird seeing myself with such long hair.

This was just an odd addition to the project where I explained Ulterior Monologue a little bit, and about buying myself time on Instagram.

I have been doing ‘dumb stuff’ at times, but I think it’s from having a toddler and being tired. I still don’t like the term ‘baby brain’.

Self-portrait of my body with a small round plaster on my left arm and a scratch on my belly.
Failed Blood Tests (7 and a half-ish weeks)
 
#SoTheyTriedToTakeMyBloodAndFailed
#ProbablyBecauseItWas10amAndIHadNotEatenYet
#AsIHadBeenSickThatMorningAndItPutMeOff
#ItSeemsSoEarlyToBeTalkingAboutOptions
#WhereIWantToGiveBirthWhenItSeemsSoEarlyAndIDoNotKnowTheFullFacts
#TheMidwifeMentionedAHomeBirth
#ILikeTheIdeaOfItButImmediatelyIJustThoughtAboutTheNeighboursAndWhatTheyWouldThink
#LivingInAFlatWithNeighboursOnMostSidesAndUpAndDownDoesNotMakeItSoAppealing
#ButIDoNotHearMuchFromThem
#ApartFromOneNeighbourWhoCoughsLoudly
#AndOnceICouldHearOneVomitingThroughTheVents
#WhichIsWhatIWorriedThisMorningWhenIWasBeingSick
#TIsWorriedAboutTheRisksOfHomeBirth
#SoINeedToFindHimSomeInfo
#OtherPeopleHaveExpressedTheirDisapproval
#WhichUpsetsMe
#AsItIsSoEarlyAndItIsNotSetInStoneYet
#ButThatIsMyPersonalPreference
#AndIAmTheOneGivingBirth
#AndIWantToFeelAsRelaxedAndComfortableAsPossibleToDoTheJobThatPeopleHaveBeenDoingForThousandsOfYears
#AsICanNotBeBotheredWithBeingSuperStressedOut
#LikeISaidMyMainConcernIsTheNeighbours
#SoLetUsHopeForAShortLabourThatIsMidDayAndNotMidNight
#ButItMightNotHappen
#MaybeIWillGoToTheHospitalOrABirthingCentre
#ABirthingPoolIsAllIReallyWant
#AsIWillNotGetASummerHolidaySoICanPretendIAmInTheSeaWhichIsWhereIFeelMostAtPeace
#FingersCrossedThatAllGoesWellFromHere
#ItAllSeemsTooEarlyButTodayMadeThingsABitMoreReal
#IDoNotKnowHowIGotTheScratchOnMyBelly

I learned a lot from all the blood tests to know to eat and drink more this time, though due to Covid my first tests were delayed anyways. They didn’t even ask me where I wanted to give birth this time. I’m also less for a homebirth as we live with my Nan, but it would be easier with not having to worry about childcare for B etc.


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Pregnancy Waiting II

Mum Looks #1 (10 Weeks? / 11th June 2021)

Self-portrait of myself wearing a colourful top and shorts. I have a book tucked into the back of my shorts and a pig puppet hanging out of my pocket.
Mum Looks #1 (10 Weeks? / 11th June 2021)
 
#ThisIsHowICarriedAPuppetAndABookUpTheStairsTheOtherDayWhileHoldingB
#ThePuppetUsedToDistractHerDuringNappyChangesButNowALittleMusicalPianoWorksBetter
#TheBookIsTheVeryHungryCaterpillarWhichBLikesALot
#NotLongAgoIWasTalkingToAnotherMumAboutAnUpcomingBookFestivalWhereAuthorsWillReadTheirBooks
#IJokedThatAllOfBsFavouriteAuthorsAreDeadAsIThoughtThatEricCarleHadDiedALongTimeAgo
#IWasSurprisedAfterAQuickOnlineSearchThatHeWasStillAliveButThenHeDiedACoupleOfWeeksLater
#IWasSupposedToHaveMyFirstVaccineThisWeekButAfterALotOfResearchIDecidedToWaitUntilIAmInMySecondTrimester
#TheBabyDevelopsSoMuchInTheFirstTrimesterAndIAmFeelingSoSick
#TheyDoNotKnowTheLongTermEffectsOfTheVaccinationsOnUnbornBabiesSoIWouldRatherWaitABit
#IrelandSuggestsWaitingUntil14WeeksToGetTheVaccineAndIHaveSeenThatInAFewPlaces
#SoIJustNeedToBeCarefulAndTryNotToGetCovidBeforeThen
#InABabyClassTheOtherDayWeDidNotHaveToWearAMaskWhenWeWereSatDown
#AndInATakeawayAGuyWalkedInWithoutAMaskButIPlanToKeepWearingMineUntilIGetAVaccine
#IAmStartingToThinkThatMaybeIAmMoreSixWeeksPregnantThanTen
#IThinkIWouldHaveBeenFeelingThisSickForLongerIfIWasTenWeeks
#ButIWasAlsoSoConvincedThatIWasPregnantWhenIWouldHaveOnlyBeenTwoWeeksIfIAmOnlySixWeeksNow
#ItHasBeenGoodThatTiagoHadThisWeekOffAsItMeansIHaveHadPlentyOfTimeToRest
#WeHaveNotDoneMuchButThatIsFineAsIHaveBeenFeelingSoTiredAndSick
#BWokeUpAtSixFortyTodayRatherThanFiveFortyWhichWasABitOfARelief
#WeHaveSatInTheParkAlotAndTodayWePlanToGoToAWildlifeCentre
#IUpdatedHerBabyBookTheOtherDaySoItIsNearlyCompleteNow
#IFeelLikeTheSecondKidWillNotHaveSuchAGoodOneButINeedToMakeTheEffortToMakeSureTheyHaveSomething
#TheWombMustBeQuiteResilientToDealWithPregnantPeopleLookingAfterKids
#BIsAlwaysFallingOnMeOrUsingMyStomachAsASupportPost
#IHaveAlreadyHadMoreKnocksToMyStomachThanIDidDuringMyWholePregnancyWithHer
#LastTimeWhenIWasPregnantIGotALetterFromTheMidwivesAfterTwoDays
#LastNightIGotATextFromMyDoctorsSayingINeedToPickAReferralLetterUpFromReception
#IAmGuessingItIsToDoWithTheMidwivesButItSeemsWeirdThatTheyDoNotPostOrEmailIt
#WellIWentToPickUpMyLetterUpAndIHaveCalledTheHospital
#TheyHavePutMeDownAsSixWeeksForNowAndApparentlyTheyDoNotHaveABedForMeAtTheDueDateIfIAmTenWeeks

(20th August: This probably won’t become a mini-series, but maybe it should. I think my whole project is just Mum Looks – me looking dishevelled.)

#ThisIsHowICarriedAPuppetAndABookUpTheStairsTheOtherDayWhileHoldingB

I tried to take a photo of my look on my phone at the time, but it was hard.

#ThePuppetUsedToDistractHerDuringNappyChangesButNowALittleMusicalPianoWorksBetter

I think it plays about four tunes automatically and I seem to know which one is coming next now. (If I know which one is coming I should know how many it has, but I can’t be bothered to work it out.)

(20th August: It has four. Now I just use any tactic to get her to stay still. Earlier I was using her bath toy, but sometimes it’s a tub with the lid screwed on tight, or a book or anything.)

#TheBookIsTheVeryHungryCaterpillarWhichBLikesALot

I haven’t read it to her in a few days, which I am somewhat happy about as I need a break from it.

#NotLongAgoIWasTalkingToAnotherMumAboutAnUpcomingBookFestivalWhereAuthorsWillReadTheirBooks

I think a lot of children’s authors will be present.

#IJokedThatAllOfBsFavouriteAuthorsAreDeadAsIThoughtThatEricCarleHadDiedALongTimeAgo

She was a Mum at the park and we had a very brief conversation. She likes a lot of Pam Adams’ books and I just looked and she died in 2010…

#IWasSurprisedAfterAQuickOnlineSearchThatHeWasStillAliveButThenHeDiedACoupleOfWeeksLater

RIP Eric Carle. We like his From Head To Toe book too.

#IWasSupposedToHaveMyFirstVaccineThisWeekButAfterALotOfResearchIDecidedToWaitUntilIAmInMySecondTrimester

It was stressing me out, so now I am glad I decided to wait.

(20th August: I ended up getting the vaccine at 13 weeks after advice became a bit more consistent. I was also swayed by a talk by Pregnant Then Screwed and Viki Male, an immunologist. Here is the talk on Instagram.)

#TheBabyDevelopsSoMuchInTheFirstTrimesterAndIAmFeelingSoSick #TheyDoNotKnowTheLongTermEffectsOfTheVaccinationsOnUnbornBabiesSoIWouldRatherWaitABit

Research shows that babies are being born fine, but it is too early to know if there are long term effects and when is best to get the vaccine.

I’m feeling sick all of the time so I don’t want to get ill on top of it if I have a bad reaction…

#IrelandSuggestsWaitingUntil14WeeksToGetTheVaccineAndIHaveSeenThatInAFewPlaces

I saw on Twitter that a country (not sure which one) was offering the vaccine to women over 14 weeks. The UK and my doctor say all trimesters are fine, but I’d rather wait…

#SoIJustNeedToBeCarefulAndTryNotToGetCovidBeforeThen

I’ve managed it this far, but you never know.

#InABabyClassTheOtherDayWeDidNotHaveToWearAMaskWhenWeWereSatDown

I walked in and was like ‘why does everyone look different?’ After a while a couple more women walked in wearing them, but the teacher said we don’t have to wear them while sat down. I took mine off, though I wanted to keep it on. Next time I will as B runs off a lot so I need to get up and pick her up.

#AndInATakeawayAGuyWalkedInWithoutAMaskButIPlanToKeepWearingMineUntilIGetAVaccine

I shouldn’t let my awkwardness affect my personal safety. Maybe it’s unnecessary but I do not want to risk it.

I definitely will have a vaccine in my second trimester as getting Covid in the third trimester is quite dangerous for a pregnant person.

#IAmStartingToThinkThatMaybeIAmMoreSixWeeksPregnantThanTen

This ball of fun again.

#IThinkIWouldHaveBeenFeelingThisSickForLongerIfIWasTenWeeks

Looking at my Waiting project I was feeling sick at 6 weeks and by 8 weeks I felt really bad.

#ButIWasAlsoSoConvincedThatIWasPregnantWhenIWouldHaveOnlyBeenTwoWeeksIfIAmOnlySixWeeksNow

With B I had a period of two days, then it stopped so I thought it was weird, did a pregnancy test and I was about 4 weeks.

Earlier in the year when I was pregnant I had a period of sorts, then I was starting to wake up feeling sick and I was pregnant. About 6 weeks.

This time I had a normal period, then what seemed like a normal period, then a missed period. Then I did a test. I was feeling a bit sick before my missed period/or imagining things as I wanted to be pregnant. ?

#ItHasBeenGoodThatTiagoHadThisWeekOffAsItMeansIHaveHadPlentyOfTimeToRest

I am going to struggle when he goes back to work next week.

#WeHaveNotDoneMuchButThatIsFineAsIHaveBeenFeelingSoTiredAndSick

It’s been nice to just chill at home with T being available.

#BWokeUpAtSixFortyTodayRatherThanFiveFortyWhichWasABitOfARelief

Her heating comes on for a bit between 4 and 5, but it has been the last few days so who knows why she slept better today?

#WeHaveSatInTheParkAlotAndTodayWePlanToGoToAWildlifeCentre

Simple things. Hopefully she likes the centre today.

#IUpdatedHerBabyBookTheOtherDaySoItIsNearlyCompleteNow

Hurrah. I hadn’t looked at in a few months.

#IFeelLikeTheSecondKidWillNotHaveSuchAGoodOneButINeedToMakeTheEffortToMakeSureTheyHaveSomething

Or I need to change the way I do it. I’d feel bad if they didn’t have one.

#TheWombMustBeQuiteResilientToDealWithPregnantPeopleLookingAfterKids #BIsAlwaysFallingOnMeOrUsingMyStomachAsASupportPost #IHaveAlreadyHadMoreKnocksToMyStomachThanIDidDuringMyWholePregnancyWithHer

It freaks me out a bit when she touches my stomach, but I’m sure the baby is well protected.

#LastTimeWhenIWasPregnantIGotALetterFromTheMidwivesAfterTwoDays

Even though my Doctor said there was a massive delay with them.

#LastNightIGotATextFromMyDoctorsSayingINeedToPickAReferralLetterUpFromReception #IAmGuessingItIsToDoWithTheMidwivesButItSeemsWeirdThatTheyDoNotPostOrEmailIt

So it took longer to do the referral letter this time than it did for me to get a letter in the post this time? I know they’re busy. Maybe they thought it would be quicker for me to pick it up. It seems weird though. I’m going to go pick it up now.

#WellIWentToPickUpMyLetterUpAndIHaveCalledTheHospital

I guess they say to pick it up from reception now as the Doctors is operating more like in the ‘old days’ now. No having to wait outside for ages – the door was open.

I got myself a veggie samosa from a nearby shop on the way back and it was good.

#TheyHavePutMeDownAsSixWeeksForNowAndApparentlyTheyDoNotHaveABedForMeAtTheDueDateIfIAmTenWeeks

She said only I could say what date to put me down as. I said for 10 weeks. She said ‘well there are no beds left for then’. So I said to put me down as 6 weeks for now and we will have to see. If I wanted to be put down as 10 weeks a letter had to be sent to the higher ups or something, and maybe I am just 6 weeks. What a faff.

She said the first appointment will either be on the phone or in person. Last time they told me it would be on the phone, so things are changing.

(20th August: I was only 6 weeks here.)

6 weeks pregnant with B comparison:

Self-portrait of me sat with a purple scarf over myself. My left hand is just below my lips and I am gazing off and look deep in thought, though possibly just feeling sick.
Morning Sickness Is Not Only A Morning Thing (6 and a half weeks)
 
#SoTheSicknessComesAndGoes
#MorningSicknessIsSuchALie
#IAskedTheDoctorIfSheHadAnyTipsAfterIFirstWentWhenIFoundOut
#SheSaidThatMorningSicknessIsNotOnlyAMorningThing
#WellSheDidNotLie
#SometimesItIsTheMorning
#YesterdayICouldHaveBeenSickOverEverything
#LastWeekItWasMoreAnAfternoonThing
#ButSometimesItIsTheEvening
#SomeoneWasTalkingAboutWarmCamelsMilkTheOtherDay
#AndItWasMakingMeSoIll
#ThenILookedAtMyCollectionOfSoups
#AndJustReadingTheFlavoursMadeMeFeelIll
#ItIsSuchAWeirdThing
#IKnowThatNoOneReallyLikesToVomit
#ButIReallyHateIt
#IOnceProudlyCouldSayIHadNotVomitedInAtLeast10Years
#AndThenMyHousemateMadeMeSuperStrongRumCocktailsWhenIWasDoingMyBA
#AndThatWasGrim
#AndACharmingExBoyfriendTookPolaroidsOfMeByTheToilet 
#EvenThoughHeWasSickMostWeekendsBecauseOfAlcohol
#IDoNotKnowWhatHappenedToThosePolaroids
#BetTheyShowUpIn50Years
#Anyways
#YesterdayIHadStrongMeatAndFishCravingsEvenThoughIHaveBeenVegetarianForOverHalfMyLife
#CouldHaveEasilyEatenCodAndChipsOrATurkeyAndStuffingSandwich
#ThoughIThinkTheyWouldHaveMadeMeSick
#SoLastNightISettledForAVeganFishFreeBurger
#ItWasProbablyTheFirstTimeIHadEatenAFishBurger
#AndItWasAlrightButIWouldNotBeInARushToEatItAgain

Morning sickness is definitely a lie. With B I was generally sick in the mornings though struggled to eat anything at dinner except for pasta. This time I have been mostly sick in the evenings.

I didn’t like soup again this time and things like baked beans.

I haven’t had strong meat and fish cravings this time, though I’ve been taking double the amount of iron lately.

The bit about my ex-boyfriend taking pictures of me vomiting isn’t pleasant, but it’s true. Now I just take pictures of myself after vomiting…


Thanks for reading! If you’re enjoying my blog (and/or the work I make) please consider supporting me by ‘buying me a coffee’ on Ko-fi – thanks!