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Pregnancy Waiting II

General Documenting Pregnancy Shoot IV (24 Weeks / 17th October 2021)

Shoot which I am recreating for the 4th time this pregnancy. I am wearing a bra and leggings. I have my right hand clasping my left elbow. My bump is bigger than the previous version of this image.
General Documenting Pregnancy Shoot IV (24 Weeks / 17th October 2021)

#IThoughtItWasTimeThatIDoOneOfTheseShootsAgain
#TheBraThatIWearForThemHasFallenApartALotSinceTheFirstShootSoItWillBeGoingInTheBinOnceBabyXIsBorn
#MyBumpIsDefinitelyGettingBiggerAndICanNotImagineItGettingMuchBiggerButIKnowItWill
#IAmStrugglingToBendDownToPickThingsUpNowWhichIsReallyHandyAsBLikesToThrowEverythingOnTheFloor
#YesterdayISuddenlyFeltTheUrgeToTidyUpOurRoomAndGetRidOfLotsOfThings
#IDoNeedToDeclutterAndReduceMyStuffAsWeArePlanningToMoveAtSomePointNextYear
#SoItIsBetterToDoItNowWhileICanMoveAboutIshAndBeforeBabyXIsBorn
#ThereIsSoMuchStuffThatHasSurvived5MovesWithMeButINeedToBeRealisticWhetherIWouldWantToPayToShipItInTheFutureAndTheAnswerIsUsuallyNo
#IThinkTheOrganisingPlusDoingSomeExtraDanceVideosReallyTiredMeOut
#ThisMorningBWasUpAtFiveThirtySoTiagoWentToGetHerAndUsuallyIWakeUpButIWasAsleepWithHerPlayingRightNextToMe
#SheHasBeenAwakeAtFiveThirtyTheLastFewMorningsWhichIsNotMuchFunThoughAtLeastSheHasALongFirstNap
#IThinkItIsDueToHerTeethingAsSheSeemsToAlwaysHaveHerFingersInHerMouth
#SheOnlyReallyHasMolarsLeftToComeThroughAndTheyCanNotBePleasantAtAll
#ILikeHowIUsedToCountHowManyTeethSheHasAndNowIHaveNoIdea
#WeHaveFinallyBookedToGoAndLookAtANurseryForHer
#TheDaysWeAreThinkingWillMeanWeWillNeedToCancelHerMusicClassAndIWasFeelingBadAboutItAsILikeHerTeacherALot
#ButItTurnsOutHerTeacherIsFiveWeeksLessPregnantThanMeSoSheWillBeGoingOnMaternityLeaveAndNowIDoNotFeelSoBad
#IAmFeelingQuiteStressedAboutBeingPregnantAndTheFactWeWillSoonHaveTwoKids
#WeJustSeemSoTiredAtTheMomentAndEvenThoughBWakesUpEarlyAtLeastWeDoGetAGoodAmountOfSleep
#IJustNeedToGoToBedEarlierWhichToBeFairIDidLastNightButItObviouslyWasNotEnough
#EveryoneKeepsSayingTheFirstYearIsTheHardestAndToBeHonestIAmNotLookingForwardToWeaningAndAllThatStuffAgain
#HopefullySheWillArriveAndIWillJustGetOnWithItAndAllICanDoIsToTryMyBest
#AtLeastInTheEarlyDaysTheirNeedsArePrettyBasic
#IJustNeedToMakeAnEffortToGetOutOfTheHouseOnceADayForMySanity
#ItWillBeAStruggleInTheBeginningIAmSureButWeJustNeedToFindARoutineThatWorksForUs
#IJustHopeThatWeDoNotGetLockedDownAgainButThenAgainWhatDoesItMatterWhenIDoubtIWillWantToGoFarAnyways
#IAmWorriedThatCasesAreRisingButEveryoneIsABitNonchalantAboutItButIGuessIAmMoreRelaxedNowIHaveHadMySecondVaccineAndFluJab
#IJustDoNotGetWhyWearingMasksInShopsAndStuffIsNotCompulsoryAndIAmSurprisedAtHowFewPeopleActuallyDoWearThem
#InOtherNewsBIsTryingReallyHardToTalkNowAndISwearSheSaysTickleTickleTickle
#IHaveHeardACoupleOfMamaAndMumSoundsEscapeFromHerLatelyTooSoIHopeSheMightActuallyStartSayingMumAtMeSoon

#IThoughtItWasTimeThatIDoOneOfTheseShootsAgain

The last one was at 19 weeks, so there should be a difference?

(Yes, there is – you can see the versions here: 1 / 2 / 3.)

#TheBraThatIWearForThemHasFallenApartALotSinceTheFirstShootSoItWillBeGoingInTheBinOnceBabyXIsBorn

Maybe in each picture it will start to look more shabby. I’ve been wearing my maternity bras for a while now, and this is not one of them.

#MyBumpIsDefinitelyGettingBiggerAndICanNotImagineItGettingMuchBiggerButIKnowItWill

*Nervous laugh*

#IAmStrugglingToBendDownToPickThingsUpNowWhichIsReallyHandyAsBLikesToThrowEverythingOnTheFloor

This morning she was eating some of my breakfast (scrambled eggs and crusts of my toast), and then throwing it on the floor. I did struggle to pick it up.

#YesterdayISuddenlyFeltTheUrgeToTidyUpOurRoomAndGetRidOfLotsOfThings

I love nesting.

#IDoNeedToDeclutterAndReduceMyStuffAsWeArePlanningToMoveAtSomePointNextYear

Every time I go through my things I get rid of a few more things, but I need to start being ruthless.

#SoItIsBetterToDoItNowWhileICanMoveAboutIshAndBeforeBabyXIsBorn

I am tired, so yeah there will never be a good time again.

#ThereIsSoMuchStuffThatHasSurvived5MovesWithMeButINeedToBeRealisticWhetherIWouldWantToPayToShipItInTheFutureAndTheAnswerIsUsuallyNo

Playing my favourite ‘would I pay £5 to ship this?’ game.

I told Tiago about it and he said would most things really cost £5 to ship. I said no, but would you still pay £5 to ship it? Is it worth the money?

#IThinkTheOrganisingPlusDoingSomeExtraDanceVideosReallyTiredMeOut

I did lie down before B’s second nap, but I’m not sure if I even slept.

#ThisMorningBWasUpAtFiveThirtySoTiagoWentToGetHerAndUsuallyIWakeUpButIWasAsleepWithHerPlayingRightNextToMe

Wake up as in become more alert. I ended up sleeping in until 7.10am, and then I looked through my books and stretched. Then Tiago had a nap (and is still napping as B is napping as I write this).

#SheHasBeenAwakeAtFiveThirtyTheLastFewMorningsWhichIsNotMuchFunThoughAtLeastSheHasALongFirstNap

I try not to put her down for a nap until 9, and then wake her up between 10.30 to 11 depending on our plans.

#IThinkItIsDueToHerTeethingAsSheSeemsToAlwaysHaveHerFingersInHerMouth

I’m being more generous with her paracetamol these days, as otherwise she does not nap or sleep very well. I do worry that I am drugging her at times, but it’s only when I see her with her fingers in her mouth and it’s been 4 hours since the last dose…

#SheOnlyReallyHasMolarsLeftToComeThroughAndTheyCanNotBePleasantAtAll

Bless her.

#ILikeHowIUsedToCountHowManyTeethSheHasAndNowIHaveNoIdea

If I put my finger in her mouth now it just gets bitten and it hurts.

#WeHaveFinallyBookedToGoAndLookAtANurseryForHer

Hurrah.

#TheDaysWeAreThinkingWillMeanWeWillNeedToCancelHerMusicClassAndIWasFeelingBadAboutItAsILikeHerTeacherALot

The class isn’t the best but I do really like her teacher and she makes it way more enjoyable.

#ButItTurnsOutHerTeacherIsFiveWeeksLessPregnantThanMeSoSheWillBeGoingOnMaternityLeaveAndNowIDoNotFeelSoBad

I mentioned I was pregnant last week and she said ‘oh me too’. I really could not tell that she was at all, but she does wear a baggy t-shirt. I had looked at moving locations and days, but I think once B goes down to one nap the other day and time will not work for us. Hopefully B will get enough stimulation at nursery and we can just do more music stuff at home.

#IAmFeelingQuiteStressedAboutBeingPregnantAndTheFactWeWillSoonHaveTwoKids

I feel like I’ve mentioned it before, but I am starting to get waves of overwhelmed-ness now.

#WeJustSeemSoTiredAtTheMomentAndEvenThoughBWakesUpEarlyAtLeastWeDoGetAGoodAmountOfSleep #IJustNeedToGoToBedEarlierWhichToBeFairIDidLastNightButItObviouslyWasNotEnough

This would probably make a big difference, and I’m sure once she is born I will have to just surrender to motherhood, but for now I am enjoying have a bit of evening time to myself.

#EveryoneKeepsSayingTheFirstYearIsTheHardestAndToBeHonestIAmNotLookingForwardToWeaningAndAllThatStuffAgain

I just need to take each day/cycle of the day at a time.

#HopefullySheWillArriveAndIWillJustGetOnWithItAndAllICanDoIsToTryMyBest

We wanted this baby and I have to handle the responsibility. I am nervous though.

#AtLeastInTheEarlyDaysTheirNeedsArePrettyBasic

And she won’t be running off like B does.

#IJustNeedToMakeAnEffortToGetOutOfTheHouseOnceADayForMySanity

It will be winter, but hopefully by then spring will not be too far away.

#ItWillBeAStruggleInTheBeginningIAmSureButWeJustNeedToFindARoutineThatWorksForUs

Like I said, I need to surrender to motherhood.

#IJustHopeThatWeDoNotGetLockedDownAgainButThenAgainWhatDoesItMatterWhenIDoubtIWillWantToGoFarAnyways

B’s classes moving to zoom would make things a lot easier to be fair. I doubt we will have another lockdown though.

#IAmWorriedThatCasesAreRisingButEveryoneIsABitNonchalantAboutItButIGuessIAmMoreRelaxedNowIHaveHadMySecondVaccineAndFluJab

Other countries have less cases and are in full panic mode, but I guess they are not as vaccinated as here.

#IJustDoNotGetWhyWearingMasksInShopsAndStuffIsNotCompulsoryAndIAmSurprisedAtHowFewPeopleActuallyDoWearThem

We still wear them in shops, and I do on public transport though that is rare. I have not been wearing them in classes, but in B’s music class she does not go near anyone else and we sit far back from everyone. At another class I probably should, but no one else does… When it’s time to sing we sat at the back of the bunch.

#InOtherNewsBIsTryingReallyHardToTalkNowAndISwearSheSaysTickleTickleTickle

It sounds more like ‘iggle iggle iggle’ or something else I guess, but I think that is what she is trying to say.

#IHaveHeardACoupleOfMamaAndMumSoundsEscapeFromHerLatelyTooSoIHopeSheMightActuallyStartSayingMumAtMeSoon

She’s been saying Dada and Dad for so long, though she doesn’t really say it at Tiago much. She is growing up fast though.

Despite my nervousness I am excited to see her with her sister.

24 weeks pregnant with B comparison:

Self-portrait wearing a black dress with white stripes. I have a toy octopus on my head.
So Many Decisions To Be Made (24 and a half weeks)
 
#SoWeFinallyBoughtSomeBabyStuff
#ThereWereSomeGoodSalesOn
#SoWeOrderedSomeBabyClothes
#AndThenISawSomeCuteToysSoIBoughtACouple
#ItFeelsLikeWeAreCursingThingsByBuyingStuff
#ButIAlsoDoNotWantToGetCaughtOutByHavingNothing
#ObviouslyTheBabyWillNotKnowIfItHasToysOrNotInTheBeginning
#ButThingsLikeClothesAreNecessary
#SoManyDecisionsToBeMade
#ThingsAreSeemingMoreReal
#ThoughIAlsoDoStillForgetThatIAmPregnantSometimes
#IFeltSoHeavyNotLongAgoButIFeelLighterTheseDays
#MaybeItIsAllTheStretchingIAmDoing
#AndOrMaybeIAmNotEatingSuchBigMealsNow
#IDoASquatPoseInTheMorning
#ButInTheEveningItIsHarderAsMyBellyIsFuller
#IBoughtAHypnobirthingCourseAfterAFriendsRecommendation
#INeedToStartDoingThatJustInCaseAsAgainIDoNotWantToGetCaughtOut
#IKeepReadingThingsAboutPeopleWhoDidNotWantToBeParents
#WhereasIDoButIWorryThatIWillBeRubbish
#ThoughIRememberGoingToSeeMyNieceForTheFirstTimeAndBeingWorriedAsIHadNotBeenAroundABabyForALongTime
#ButISoonGotOverTheNervousness
#ThoughIWasJustEntertainingHerAndNotDoingHerWholeRoutineAndBeingAroundHerAllDayEveryDay
#ICanOnlyDoMyBest
#AndSoonWeWillDoAnNCTCourseSoHopefullyWeWillNotBeTooClueless
#IFeelLikeTiagoIsGoodWithKids
#IAmLookingForwardToSeeingHimAsAFather
#IGotAKickTrackingAppYesterdayToTryToMakeMeFeelBetter
#ThoughIAmNotMonitoringHowManyKicksYetButJustWhenIFeelItMoving
#TodayIHaveNotFeltItMoveMuchButIThinkIHaveNotBeenThinkingAboutItAsMuchAsYesterday

This shoot was a bit bad. It was definitely a day when I was struggling with ideas…

It’s funny now as it’s gone from being a toy that we bought to it being B’s toy that she does interact with from time to time.

#ObviouslyTheBabyWillNotKnowIfItHasToysOrNotInTheBeginning

B has only really started to interact with the toys she had then, quite recently. Especially cuddly toys.

We aren’t going to do the hypnobirthing course again, but I have the book of it which we are both planning to read again. I need to get on with it really as time is flying by…

I downloaded an app to monitor kicks but I have only used it once. This baby seems more active, so I feel reassured. I am being kicked/punched right now…


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Pregnancy Waiting II

Imitating Hiding Like B Behind A Muslin Cloth (12 Weeks? / 21st July 2021)

Self-portrait sat in front of a cupboard with a muslin cloth over my head. My arms and hands are up and I am touching the material.
Imitating B Hiding Behind A Muslin Cloth (12 Weeks? / 21st July 2021)

#BLearnedToHideAWhileAgo
#ICanNotReallyRememberWhenAsOurTimeInBirminghamIsJustOneBigBlobInMyMemory
#AndItIsEvenHardToRememberLifeBeforeBWasWalkingAroundAndThatWasNotThatLongAgo
#SheStillFallsOverABitButTheChorusOfTubthumpingComesToMindOftenWhenAsGetsBackUpQuickly
#ObviouslyTheVersesWithAllTheReferencesToDrinkingAreNotFittingButSometimesSheDoesWalkLikeSheHasHadAFewDrinks
#InOtherNewsDrinkingMoreElectrolytesSeemsToBeHelpingAndIHadNotBeenSickInAFewDaysUntilISniffedABagOfSaladToCheckIfItWasOkayToEat
#EvidentlyItWasNotOkayAndTheSlightlyRottenSmellMadeMeBarf
#IStillSeemToDryHeaveAtLeastOnceADayButItIsOkay
#ItIsGenerallyInTheMorningWhenIFirstGetUpAndBeforeIGoToBed
#IHaveToBeCarefulWhenIBrushMyTeethAndIAlsoHaveToTryHardToNotThinkAboutSickWhileBrushingThem
#IFeelLikeIAmGettingSomeEnergyBackWhichIsGood
#TheOtherDayIHadAMassiveCryForTheFirstTimeInAges
#IWasJustSoPissedOffAndStressedOutByFreedomDay
#IFeelLikeEveryDayIsAlreadyTheSameAsWeDoNotGoAnywhereSoNowIWillNeedToBeMoreCareful
#AndItHasBeenTooHotToGoOutForRegularWalksSoWeGenerallyJustGoOutInTheMorning
#BsNewFavouriteThingToDoIsDrinkFromMyCupOfWaterAndThenStickHerHandInItAndSplashAbout
#IHaveFinallyGotRoundToSortingOutLifeInsuranceAsYouNeverKnowWithTheseWeirdTimes
#BAndTheUnbornWouldGetALumpSumIfIWereToDieAndTiagoOrWhoeverLooksAfterThemWouldGetAMonthlyPaymentToGoTowardsTheirCosts
#WeOnlyHaveOneBabyClassOnAtTheMomentDueToTheSummer
#IWasSoRelievedThatEveryoneWasWearingAMask
#TheTeacherGreetedUsAtTheDoorWearingAMaskAndSheCommentedOnTheHeatAndHowPaleIAm
#IBasicallyJustWalkFromOneAreaOfShadeToAnotherAsQuickAsPossibleTheseDays
#SoIThoughtIWouldMentionThatIWasPregnantInCaseItAffectedAnyOfHerDecisions
#AtTheEndSheThankedUsAllForWearingAMaskAndProtectingEachOther
#IWasReadingTheOtherDayThatThereIsNoPointMeWearingAMaskIfNoOneElseIs
#SoIJustLookedLikeTheWeirdOneAtAnotherClassForNoReasonButAtLeastItMadeMeFeelABitBetter
#BHasAFourthToothComingThroughAndItLooksLikeOtherMightSoonBeFollowing
#ItIsAtTheTopButItLooksLikeAnotherTopOneIsHavingAGoAsWellAsSomeMolars
#ITookBOutForAWalkYesterdayAndADogCameUpToBInHerPushchair
#TheGuySaidThatSheIsElevenButWhenSheWasAPuppySheWentUpToAPushchairAndAteAKidsCrispsAndSinceThenSheSeemsToCheckAllPushchairsForCrisps  

(29th September: Just realised I named this image hiding behind, but maybe it should be more under? Oh well.)

#BLearnedToHideAWhileAgo

I am sure that I have talked about it for months.

#ICanNotReallyRememberWhenAsOurTimeInBirminghamIsJustOneBigBlobInMyMemory

Time passes very weirdly. A day feels like a week.

#AndItIsEvenHardToRememberLifeBeforeBWasWalkingAroundAndThatWasNotThatLongAgo

It seems like she has always been on her feet.

#SheStillFallsOverABitButTheChorusOfTubthumpingComesToMindOftenAsSheGetsBackUpQuickly

You know the one…

#ObviouslyTheVersesWithAllTheReferencesToDrinkingAreNotFittingButSometimesSheDoesWalkLikeSheHasHadAFewDrinks

I can’t remember the last time I had a drink…

#InOtherNewsDrinkingMoreElectrolytesSeemsToBeHelpingAndIHadNotBeenSickInAFewDaysUntilISniffedABagOfSaladToCheckIfItWasOkayToEat

Either it’s easing by itself or it’s the electrolytes. I think the electrolytes are having a big impact.

#EvidentlyItWasNotOkayAndTheSlightlyRottenSmellMadeMeBarf

It was the day that it was due to be opened by and it had not been opened yet. I opened it as the bag we were supposed to eat with dinner did not look appetising either (it came in one of those recipe boxes but they sent the wrong salad, and it looked a bit rotten too). In the end we picked some salad from the garden…

#IStillSeemToDryHeaveAtLeastOnceADayButItIsOkay

It is a bit annoying, but I’d rather dry heave than be sick.

#ItIsGenerallyInTheMorningWhenIFirstGetUpAndBeforeIGoToBed

In the morning I haven’t drank/ate much yet. In the evening I don’t like to eat too late, and I feel like I’ve had my sugar consumption for the day by then.

#IHaveToBeCarefulWhenIBrushMyTeethAndIAlsoHaveToTryHardToNotThinkAboutSickWhileBrushingThem

I’ll often brush my teeth and worry about being sick, which really doesn’t help…

#IFeelLikeIAmGettingSomeEnergyBackWhichIsGood

I wrote this at 6am. It’s now 9am and B has gone down for a nap and I will follow after I write this. Zzz. I also didn’t take B for a walk this morning as I felt so tired, but in ways I feel like I have a bit more energy at times.

#TheOtherDayIHadAMassiveCryForTheFirstTimeInAges

It did me a lot of good. I’ve felt better since then.

#IWasJustSoPissedOffAndStressedOutByFreedomDay

I’m fuming. I can’t even be bothered to rant anymore about it.

#IFeelLikeEveryDayIsAlreadyTheSameAsWeDoNotGoAnywhereSoNowIWillNeedToBeMoreCareful

The frustration is real. I’m going stir crazy enough as it is.

#AndItHasBeenTooHotToGoOutForRegularWalksSoWeGenerallyJustGoOutInTheMorning

Which I didn’t do today… So we’ll have to see if I can stomach a bit of heat later. I try to go for a walk at least once a day.

#BsNewFavouriteThingToDoIsDrinkFromMyCupOfWaterAndThenStickHerHandInItAndSplashAbout

Great. I’m like ‘aww look at her wanting to drink from a glass’ and then it’s just ‘splashhhh’. We do get a tub out for her and let her splash about a bit, and she’s been having baths more regularly due to the heat. She seems to enjoy it.

#IHaveFinallyGotRoundToSortingOutLifeInsuranceAsYouNeverKnowWithTheseWeirdTimes #BAndTheUnbornWouldGetALumpSumIfIWereToDieAndTiagoOrWhoeverLooksAfterThemWouldGetAMonthlyPaymentToGoTowardsTheirCosts

I kept getting adverts, and I don’t want to be morbid but you never know what is round the corner. There’s Covid, birthing complications, freak accidents, life… Thought I’d mention it in case this motivates anyone else to sort theirs out.

#WeOnlyHaveOneBabyClassOnAtTheMomentDueToTheSummer

And the last class (where B will graduate) is next week. It’s the end of an era!

#IWasSoRelievedThatEveryoneWasWearingAMask

Phew. I was worried…

#TheTeacherGreetedUsAtTheDoorWearingAMaskAndSheCommentedOnTheHeatAndHowPaleIAm

The teacher at our other class always worse a visor when we said we didn’t need to wear masks, but I feel like her standing there with her mask was a signal to say wear a mask please.

Yeah, have I mentioned it’s hot?

#IBasicallyJustWalkFromOneAreaOfShadeToAnotherAsQuickAsPossibleTheseDays

And that’s an effort.

#SoIThoughtIWouldMentionThatIWasPregnantInCaseItAffectedAnyOfHerDecisions

In case she was about to say ‘don’t worry about wearing masks’ or something, as I was the second person to arrive. It might sound selfish to some, but fair to others. Some women in the class are still breastfeeding and may not have wanted to get vaccinated yet as well, and someone else may be pregnant but they’re not as gobby as me. Who knows.

#AtTheEndSheThankedUsAllForWearingAMaskAndProtectingEachOther

I felt emotional. She was off the other week as she had to self-isolate. I was surprised it had not happened before. By us wearing masks it also protects her as this is her business and she can not afford to get Covid.

#IWasReadingTheOtherDayThatThereIsNoPointMeWearingAMaskIfNoOneElseIs

I’m protecting others from me-ish, but they’re not protecting me.

#SoIJustLookedLikeTheWeirdOneAtAnotherClassForNoReasonButAtLeastItMadeMeFeelABitBetter

I felt safer for sure, though I may not have actually been. Oh well.

#BHasAFourthToothComingThroughAndItLooksLikeOtherMightSoonBeFollowing

She was waking up a lot the other night and we thought it was due to the heat (she now has a better fan in her room), but it may have been the tooth. Who knows? Bit of both probably.

#ItIsAtTheTopButItLooksLikeAnotherTopOneIsHavingAGoAsWellAsSomeMolars

Seriously, the joy never ends.

#ITookBOutForAWalkYesterdayAndADogCameUpToBInHerPushchair #TheGuySaidThatSheIsElevenButWhenSheWasAPuppySheWentUpToAPushchairAndAteAKidsCrispsAndSinceThenSheSeemsToCheckAllPushchairsForCrisps

Just a (what I thought was) funny story to end things on. I was like ‘oh cute, the dog wants to say hello’, but I had a good laugh after realising she was only looking for food. Unlucky for her as I rarely give B food to eat in her pushchair.

Time for a nap. It sounds like a lot of work is going on outside – chainsaws and diggers? I hope B sleeps. I hope I sleep. I’ll read a bit of The Volunteer by Jack Fairweather first and then try to kip. I thought it’d be a small book, but it’s 780 pages. Just checked and the notes start about 200 pages from the end, so that’s a little less overwhelming now.

12 weeks pregnant with B comparison:

Self-portrait from my head to around my knees. I am looking up and off into the distance. I have a remote in my right hand. I am wearing a top say Nobody's Perfect which is pulled up so my belly is visible.
It Still Feels Like Pregnancy Is Something That Happens To Other People And Not Me (12 weeks)

#IAmNotReallyAlludingToAnythingInThisPictureByWearingATopSayingNobodysPerfect
#TheseAreTiagosPJsThatHisMumGotHimForChristmasAFewYearsAgo
#AndIKeepMeaningToTakeAPictureInThem
#IWasLookingForWhatToWearInThePicturesTodayWhenISawThem
#AndIThoughtIShouldTakeAPictureInThemWhilstICanStillFit
#AsMeAndTiagoAreAboutTheSameSizeUsually
#IAmWearingHisSandalsAlso
#MyBottomHalfIsJustABitBiggerThanHisSoHisJeansAreABitTightOnMe
#HeWearsMyClothesTooButIWearHisMore
#NobodysPerfectIsTrueThough
#WeAreWaitingForAPizzaDelivery
#ThisWillBeMyThirdTimeEatingPizzaIn6Days
#ToBeFairIReallyWantToEatASaladWithThePizza
#ButTheWeatherIsCrapSoIMightJustSliceSomeFruitAndEatItWithItAsWell
#TiagoEatsBananaAndCheeseTogetherAllTheTime
#ISawSomeoneOnTheTVEatingMustardAndBananaTogetherAtTheWeekend
#NextWeekIWillFindOutMyNewDueDate
#ButGoingOffWhatTheHospitalSaidLastTimeIAmNow12Weeks
#AllMyFacebookAdsAreBabvRelatedNow
#IWasReadingSomethingEarlierAboutGettingBabiesToSleepAndISuddenlyWorriedThatIWillBeARubbishMother
#IWillTryMyBestOfCourse
#IThinkTiagoWillBeAGoodDadWhichMakesMeFeelBetter
#ButYeahNobodyIsPerfect
#IThinkNoMatterHowYouRaiseYourKidTheyWillHaveProblemsOfSomeSort
#YouJustHaveToDoYourBestAndDoWhatYouCan
#Reaching12WeeksItFeelsABitMoreRealNow
#NotSureIfItIsMoreFoodThanBabyButThereIsDefinitelyABumpForming
#ItStillFeelsLikePregnancyIsSomethingThatHappensToOtherPeopleAndNotMe
#IAmTryingToBeMoreOptimisticButIAmStillExpectingSomethingBadToHappen
#IGuessThatIAmOnlyUsedToMenstrualCrampsSoTheseNewCrampsScareMe 

Well, the images are quite different – one is all about hiding and one is about revealing (I do like hiding and revealing as a theme).

I think I was eating fairly healthy at this point with this pregnancy, but today I said to T that I really want pizza and I think I have not been eating so well lately.

I currently do not think I am the best mother, but I am not the worst and I know that I am doing about 80% of my best. I am human, so at times I do just let her play by herself which is good for her anyways.

I am finding pregnancy weird again, and the cramps still freak me out.


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Categories
Pregnancy Waiting II

Portrait Of A Mother Of A Thirteen Month Old (11 Weeks? / 14th July 2021)

Me lying in bed hugging my pregnancy pillow, with a face mask sat on my forehead and with a hand to my mouth.
Portrait Of A Mother Of A Thirteen Month Old (11 Weeks? / 14th July 2021)

#ItSeemsQuiteFittingToTakeAPhotoOfMeLyingInBed
#IFeelLikeIDoSoAtAnyChanceIHaveNow
#IAmJustSoTiredAndItIsFunnyReadingBackOldEntriesWhenIDidNotKnowIWasPregnantYetAndJustSayingHowTiredIWas
#ISawAPregnantFriendTheOtherDayWhoAlsoHasOneKidAndSheWasSayingTheFirstTrimesterWasTheWorst
#IAmHopingMyEnergyWillReturnSoon
#IHaveFeltSoInspiredToMakeOtherWorkButJustHaveNoEnergyForIt
#IHaveBeenTryingToOnlySleepOnMyLeftSideButIAmFindingMyRightSideAndBackMoreComfortableAtTheMoment
#TalkingOfSleepingWeWentToLiverpoolForTheWeekendAndOnTheFirstDayBMissedHerSecondNap
#SheHadWokenUpFortyMinutesEarlyFromHerFirstOneWhichMeantMeTryingToEntertainHerInTheCarWhichWasUsJustReadingThroughAllOfHerBooks
#WePlannedToLetHerSleepInHerPushchairForHerSecondNapButWeWereOutForFortyMinutesWithNoSuchLuck
#ThenWeTriedToPutHerDownInACotButAfterFifteenMinutesWeGaveUpSoSheWasUpForNineHours
#WeGotIntoBedAtAroundEightAndWentToSleepAtNineThirty
#TheNextDayBHadASuperShortNapAfterWakingUpAtHerUsualTimeOfPreSix
#ButOnTheWayHomeSheSleptForTwoHoursAndICouldNotWakeHerUp
#IWasWorriedThatSheWasGoingToDropHerSecondNapButNotYetPhew
#YesterdaySomeoneWasAskingMeHowIKnewIWasReadyForASecondKidAndSheTalkedAboutHerFriendsGettingBroody
#IWasNotBroodyAtAllButIJustWantedToTryAndHaveASecondOneBeforeWeReallyKnewWhatWeWereInFor
#BIsBecomingDifficultToChangeAndOftenWillCryLoudlyForWhatSeemsLikeNoReasonAtAll
#TheOtherDayWeWereTryingToGiveHerYoghurtAndSheWasScreamingSoIJustCopiedHer
#StraightAwaySheChangedHerTuneAndStartedToLaughAndAteAllOfHerYoghurt
#ItMaybeIsNotTheBestSolutionEveryTimeButItWasMuchBetterThanGettingStressedOutAndAnnoyed
#AfterwardsWeHadAFunGameOfHerTryingToStealMyEmptyBowlOfCrispsWhenMyBackWasTurned
#SheIsBecomingQuiteTheFoodThiefTheseDaysWithHerTryingToTakeWhateverWeHave
#IHaveNotBeenSickInACoupleOfDaysButIHaveGaggedAFewTimes
#IThinkTheMoreTiredIAmTheWorseIFeelAsLastNightBeforeBedIFeltSoSickAndIWasAsleepBeforeTen
#IWasAwakeFromFourToFiveButThenCouldNotGetUpOnceBHad
#TheGovernmentHasChangedTheirStanceABitWithMasksAfter19thJulyButItSeemsLikeSomePeopleStoppedWearingThemAWhileAgo
#BsWalkingIsDefinitelyImprovingDayByDayNowAndSheCanTakeQuiteAFewStepsNow
#AtHerBabyClassSomeoneWasSayingSheFeelsLikeBIsTheCelebrityOfTheClassAsEveryoneKnowsHerName
#SheReallyLikesToTryToStealEveryonesStuffButEveryoneIsNiceAboutIt

#ItSeemsQuiteFittingToTakeAPhotoOfMeLyingInBed

Well, I am yet to take it yet but it is what I have in mind. Lying in bed with my eye mask on (the one I got as an emergency in case I had to go into hospital to give birth to B – which I did).

#IFeelLikeIDoSoAtAnyChanceIHaveNow

Tiago had gone out with B to the supermarket the other night (for the first time in ages). I was about to go to sleep when I could hear that my Uncles were visiting. ‘Why does it have to be today?’ But it was nice to see them.

(19th September: I was disappointed to miss them the other day as B and I were both napping, and they only made a short visit.)

#IAmJustSoTiredAndItIsFunnyReadingBackOldEntriesWhenIDidNotKnowIWasPregnantYetAndJustSayingHowTiredIWas

I was confused as to why I was so tired. I’m taking double the amount of iron now, and my vitamins, but I guess it is just a big part of the first trimester. Great.

#ISawAPregnantFriendTheOtherDayWhoAlsoHasOneKidAndSheWasSayingTheFirstTrimesterWasTheWorst

She also had sickness and just felt so tired. I actually think I might have mentioned this in my last post, but it was on my mind.

#IAmHopingMyEnergyWillReturnSoon

I hope so. I am getting into bed as soon as I finish writing this.

#IHaveFeltSoInspiredToMakeOtherWorkButJustHaveNoEnergyForIt

By the time my energy returns the inspiration may have gone. What can I do?

#IHaveBeenTryingToOnlySleepOnMyLeftSideButIAmFindingMyRightSideAndBackMoreComfortableAtTheMoment

It is early days, so I do not need to really worry about how I am sleeping yet but I try to sleep on my left anyways. Sometimes I want to sleep on my front, but I am avoiding it.

#TalkingOfSleepingWeWentToLiverpoolForTheWeekendAndOnTheFirstDayBMissedHerSecondNap

It was a friend’s first birthday, so she obviously did not want to miss a minute of it.

#SheHadWokenUpFortyMinutesEarlyFromHerFirstOneWhichMeantMeTryingToEntertainHerInTheCarWhichWasUsJustReadingThroughAllOfHerBooks

I say us. I mean it was me reading to her. I was hoping to have a nap, so I was tired, and Tiago was also tired from driving. Tired family.

#WePlannedToLetHerSleepInHerPushchairForHerSecondNapButWeWereOutForFortyMinutesWithNoSuchLuck

Nothing like pushing B round a park screaming. (Her, not me.)

#ThenWeTriedToPutHerDownInACotButAfterFifteenMinutesWeGaveUpSoSheWasUpForNineHours

She did not seem that tired though.

#WeGotIntoBedAtAroundEightAndWentToSleepAtNineThirty

B had gone to bed at 7:50. Brushed teeth and into bedddd.

#TheNextDayBHadASuperShortNapAfterWakingUpAtHerUsualTimeOfPreSix

She will usually have 2 hours if she’s up that early, but it was more like 40 minutes.

#ButOnTheWayHomeSheSleptForTwoHoursAndICouldNotWakeHerUp

I did not want her to sleep for that long as I was worried she would have a super late bedtime. She went to bed at 7:45pm, as the England v Italy game was at 8pm and it was fine. She slept until her usual time.

#IWasWorriedThatSheWasGoingToDropHerSecondNapButNotYetPhew

I am not ready yet.

#YesterdaySomeoneWasAskingMeHowIKnewIWasReadyForASecondKidAndSheTalkedAboutHerFriendsGettingBroody #IWasNotBroodyAtAllButIJustWantedToTryAndHaveASecondOneBeforeWeReallyKnewWhatWeWereInFor

It’s really down to wanting two kids and feeling like I’m not up to much at the moment besides looking after B, so it seems like a good time to try to have another one. My body felt strong enough. I have been so anxious this week about the pregnancy, but I am trying to stay calm. Two weeks until my first scan…

#BIsBecomingDifficultToChangeAndOftenWillCryLoudlyForWhatSeemsLikeNoReasonAtAll

I am still struggling to change her nappies, and then add in her excessive wriggling and escaping. It’s great.

#TheOtherDayWeWereTryingToGiveHerYoghurtAndSheWasScreamingSoIJustCopiedHer

I remember my Mum doing it with me when I was crying crocodile tears.

#StraightAwaySheChangedHerTuneAndStartedToLaughAndAteAllOfHerYoghurt

Nothing like laughter to get you out of a bad mood. I think she is teething a lot at the moment, so that might be why.

#ItMaybeIsNotTheBestSolutionEveryTimeButItWasMuchBetterThanGettingStressedOutAndAnnoyed

Obviously if she was really upset it would not be a nice thing to do, but when it seems like she just doesn’t want to do something it is a nice trick. I’d rather make her laugh than get really pissed off.

#AfterwardsWeHadAFunGameOfHerTryingToStealMyEmptyBowlOfCrispsWhenMyBackWasTurned

I had some crisps in the bowl. She was trying to eat them. I then put the bowl on the table and she kept going to it and digging her hands in. Later on I had my back to her and she would touch the bowl while my back was turned, then I’d turn round to look at her and she would laugh. I do love when she laughs.

#SheIsBecomingQuiteTheFoodThiefTheseDaysWithHerTryingToTakeWhateverWeHave

She was trying to eat my Nan’s breakfast again today. I had some strawberries the other night and my plate was empty, but she would just scratch the plate anyways and then lick her fingers. She is funny.

#IHaveNotBeenSickInACoupleOfDaysButIHaveGaggedAFewTimes

Nothing like going to the bathroom and expecting to be sick, but just dry heaving instead. Or sometimes it is just when I am in the kitchen. The body is weird.

#IThinkTheMoreTiredIAmTheWorseIFeelAsLastNightBeforeBedIFeltSoSickAndIWasAsleepBeforeTen

I hadn’t napped during her second nap, so I felt tired. When I get tired I faff, but I should just relax instead. I was going to hang up the washing, but I stood up and thought I was going to be sick. I had to lie down in bed as I had already brushed my teeth and did not fancy being sick.

#IWasAwakeFromFourToFiveButThenCouldNotGetUpOnceBHad

I read some of my book to try to feel sleepy again. T and B were up from 5:40. I slept for another hour. Thanks Tiago.

#TheGovernmentHasChangedTheirStanceABitWithMasksAfter19thJulyButItSeemsLikeSomePeopleStoppedWearingThemAWhileAgo

Though I’ve just seen that masks will still be mandatory on London transport. That’s good.

#BsWalkingIsDefinitelyImprovingDayByDayNowAndSheCanTakeQuiteAFewStepsNow

She can do more than a few really. Ten plus quite confidently, maybe more? I need to get her some shoes. I’ve ordered a foot measurer, so we can just measure them when we want to and order online.

#AtHerBabyClassSomeoneWasSayingSheFeelsLikeBIsTheCelebrityOfTheClassAsEveryoneKnowsHerName

I feel bad as I do not know many of the names (unless I think back to the register), but the teachers are always commenting on what B is doing. She was scared of some animal puppets again yesterday 🙁

#SheReallyLikesToTryToStealEveryonesStuffButEveryoneIsNiceAboutIt

Shoes, phones, toys, pushchairs, whatever. If it is there B will have it.

I maybe have time for an hour nap if my brain switches off quick enough…

11 weeks pregnant with B comparison:

A close-up of my face showing a couple of spots in my hairline.
I Feel Like My Body Has A Big Job To Perform Now (11 weeks)

#FeelingConcernedAsIHaveNotFeltSickThisEveningButIFeltSickDuringTheDay 
#MaybeIHaveJustEatenEnoughDinner 
#IWillProbablyFeelSickInAnHour 
#IHeardThatSourSweetsAreGoodForSickness 
#IFoundSomeGoodVeggieSweets 
#DoNotThinkTheyReallyHelpedWithTheSicknessButTheyTasteGood 
#Anyways 
#ThisTextIsSupposedToBeAboutSpots 
#WhenIHadTheCoilISuddenlyStartedToGetLotsOfSpotsOnMyScalp 
#IFiguredItWasDueToTooMuchCopperInMyDietAndInMyBody 
#SoMaybeIHaveBeenEatingALotOfThingsThatHaveCopperInThem 
#ButIDoubtIt 
#IGuessTheSpotsAreMoreToDoWithHormones 
#MyFaceFeelsSpottierTooButIThinkThatHasALotToDoWithTheWeather 
#AsMySkinGetsWorseThanNormalInTheWinter 
#ButIHaveBigSpotsOnMyHairline 
#INoticedThemTheOtherDayButTheySeemBiggerNow 
#FunTimes 
#MaybeINeedToWashMyHairMoreAndIHaveBeenWearingAHat 
#SoMaybeThatPlaysAPartInIt 
#CanNotBelieveIAm11WeeksNow 
#StillNervous 
#TiagoCanNotLieToSaveHisLifeSoHeToldAFewPeopleYesterday 
#SoTheNumberOfPeopleWhoKnowHasNowGrown 
#IJustFeelMorePressureNow 
#NoOneIsPuttingPressureOnMe 
#ButIFeelLikeMyBodyHasABigJobToPerformNow 
#AndIAmNervousThatThereIsPlentyOfTimeForThingsToGoWrong 
#NotFeelingSickNowIsABitWorrying 
#ButIThinkThatIWillGoBrushMyTeethNowAndThatWillProbablyMakeMeFeelSick 

(19th September: Using an image with a border as my laptop stopped charging the other day, and T’s laptop seems incapable of opening editing software – I also have to paste the letter s whenever I want to use it. I am hoping to have my own again in a few days.)

I have felt just as anxious this time as I did with B. I haven’t eaten any sour sweets (I actually forgot about this), but I was eyeing up someone’s sweets on the train the other day.

My face was spotty for a bit, which was probably hormones.

I have been washing my hair even less probably, but it doesn’t look too bad.

I am now 20 weeks and I dry heave again when I brush my teeth in the evenings. This has gone on for longer than when I was pregnant with B…

I feel like I do have a big job ahead of me again, but I am a bit more relaxed about it in ways as I have been through it all once before, and I am feeling a bit more like what will happen will happen – though obviously I am hoping for the best outcomes. Fingers crossed.


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