Categories
Pregnancy Waiting II

Imitating B Pulling Her Hair (19 Weeks / 12th September 2021)

Self-portrait with my hair covering my face and I'm pulling pieces of my hair on the left and right side of my head.
Imitating B Pulling Her Hair (19 Weeks / 12th September 2021)
 
#BIsStartingToBecomeMoreAwareOfHerselfAndHerBodyIThink
#SometimesSheWillJustPullAtHerHairButNotInABadWayJustInAOohIHaveHairWay
#ShePullsMyHairInAHowMuchDoIHaveToPullThisToGetItToComeOutWay
#IGotBackFromLondonLastNightAndHadAShowerToDecontaminate
#IWentToBedWithWetHairAsIWasSoTiredSoMaybeItWillStillLookABitWildByTheTimeIDoAShoot
#IHadNotBeenAwayFromBForMoreThan6HoursBeforeAndInTheEndIDidNotSeeHerForAbout41Hours
#ILeftJustBeforeHerSecondNapOnFridayAndGotBackAfterSheHadGoneToBedOnSaturday
#IHadBeenExcitedAboutGoingButAsIPackedOnFridayISuddenlyFeltQuiteEmotionalAndSadAboutLeaving
#PackingForAnAdultForOneNightIsSoMuchLessWorkThanPackingForTwoAdultsAndAToddler
#OnFridayMorningTiagoEndedUpGivingBASpoonfulOfSlightlySoapyWaterInHerWaterCupRatherThanHerVitaminsSoIWasALittleNervous
#IHadBeenRinsingAnOldBottleForRecyclingAndMyNanMustHaveMovedItAwayFromTheDrainingBoard
#BsParacetamolIsSometimesPinkAndSometimesClearSoTiagoAssumedTheVitaminsMightBeTheSame
#ButInTheEndItWasFineAndTiagoSentMeVideosOfHimChasingAfterBAndHerCuddlingHerCollectionOfTeddies
#MyNanKeepsBuyingHerTeddiesButSheHasNeverPaidMuchAttentionToThemUntilThisWeek
#SheIsGoingThroughALeapAndHasChangedSoMuchInTheLastWeek
#ItWasHotTheOtherDayAndSheWasSatJustInHerNappySpittingOutHerWaterOntoHerChestAndRubbingItIn
#SheCouldNotSwimInTheSeaSoSheHadToMakeDoWithATubOfWaterOutsideButSheHadAGreatTime
#ButYesItWasNiceToHaveAnEveningAndDayAwayForMyselfAndToSeeSoManyOldFriendsAndAcquaintancesAfterSoLong
#IKeptThinkingThatEveryoneHasBeenCarryingOnAsNormalWhileIHaveBeenAwayLookingAfterB
#ButOfCourseThePandemicHasBeenDifferentForEveryoneAndItWasAStrangeExperienceForAll
#ILostMyVoiceAtOnePointAsIWasNotUsedToTalkingAndSpeakingLoudlySoMuch
#MyBumpFeltHeavyAtTimesFromAllTheWalkingAndStandingAndBeforeBoardingTrainsAndTubesIWouldRubMyBellyToShowIWasPregnant
#ItWasUnnecessaryThoughAsTransportWasPrettyQuietWhichWasNiceAndISatInThePregnancySeatsWithoutFeelingSuperAwkwardThoughIFeltALittleBitSo
#ThisWeekBHadHerFirstToddlerClassAndAtTheBeginningSheJustSatByHerPushchair
#IGuessItWasWeirdForHerAsSheHadGoneFromBeingTheOldestToOneOfTheYoungest
#SheHadAlsoNotBeenAroundSoManyYoungPeopleInAWhileSoItMustHaveBeenALotToTakeIn
#ItWillBeGoodForHerThoughAndSheWillLearnALotFromTheOlderOnes
#IAmHopingToJustTakeBabyXAlongToBsClassesAfterTheyAreBorn
#IAmTryingToMakeAnEffortToMeetMoreLocalMumsWhoAreAlsoPregnantViaThoseAwkwardMumApps
#MyThinkingIsTheyWillBeOnMaternityLeaveSoWillHopefullyWantToHangOutAndWeCanPassTheLongWeekdaysTogetherAtTimes

#BIsStartingToBecomeMoreAwareOfHerselfAndHerBodyIThink

She was already aware of it, but it seems like she is more so.

#SometimesSheWillJustPullAtHerHairButNotInABadWayJustInAOohIHaveHairWay

Maybe she is stressed sometimes, or maybe it is just something to do? It seems to be in a playful/toddler way.

#ShePullsMyHairInAHowMuchDoIHaveToPullThisToGetItToComeOutWay

Maybe she is just more aware of bodies in general. She likes to grab our noses more now.

#IGotBackFromLondonLastNightAndHadAShowerToDecontaminate

Put all my clothes in the wash, had a shower and washed my hair.

#IWentToBedWithWetHairAsIWasSoTiredSoMaybeItWillStillLookABitWildByTheTimeIDoAShoot

It looked WILD this morning. We took B for a walk and I don’t want to brush it, so I looked a bit of a mess, but it will have fallen out more by the time I get round to the shoot.

#IHadNotBeenAwayFromBForMoreThan6HoursBeforeAndInTheEndIDidNotSeeHerForAbout41Hours

Those 6 hours were in November…

On holiday the other week I did have a bit of time away from her, but I would generally see her after two or three hours.

It was T’s first time looking after B for a whole day, though my Nan was around and my Mum was about for a bit.

#ILeftJustBeforeHerSecondNapOnFridayAndGotBackAfterSheHadGoneToBedOnSaturday

So I did not see her until this morning.

#IHadBeenExcitedAboutGoingButAsIPackedOnFridayISuddenlyFeltQuiteEmotionalAndSadAboutLeaving

I did miss her while I was away, but I was also happy to see so many people and be reminded that I do have friends and know people.

#PackingForAnAdultForOneNightIsSoMuchLessWorkThanPackingForTwoAdultsAndAToddler

One small backpack. I packed way too many changes of clothes, but whatever. So nice to have a short packing list rather than a massive one.

#OnFridayMorningTiagoEndedUpGivingBASpoonfulOfSlightlySoapyWaterInHerWaterCupRatherThanHerVitaminsSoIWasALittleNervous #IHadBeenRinsingAnOldBottleForRecyclingAndMyNanMustHaveMovedItAwayFromTheDrainingBoard #BsParacetamolIsSometimesPinkAndSometimesClearSoTiagoAssumedTheVitaminsMightBeTheSame

He had given her milk and pointed to a glass and said ‘this is what is left of B’s vitamin water’ (we mix her vitamins in with her water as it seems easier than giving it on a spoon, though she likes it so she probably would take it from the spoon now). I was confused and said ‘it looks a bit clear’, but he mentioned about her paracetamol sometimes being clear and sometimes being pink. Her vitamins are a very strong pink.

After a few seconds it clicked and I could not stop laughing. I tried the water to make T feel a bit better. It couldn’t have been so bad as B had drank most of the cup.

#ButInTheEndItWasFineAndTiagoSentMeVideosOfHimChasingAfterBAndHerCuddlingHerCollectionOfTeddies

A good run around before bed – ‘I’m going to get you’.

A morning cuddle with three teddies.

#MyNanKeepsBuyingHerTeddiesButSheHasNeverPaidMuchAttentionToThemUntilThisWeek

It’s probably because before I put her down for a nap for bed I mention the three stuffed animals that are in her cot. Sometimes she cuddles them, sometimes she cuddles her water cup.

#SheIsGoingThroughALeapAndHasChangedSoMuchInTheLastWeek

She just suddenly seems smarter. She now makes it clear when she wants more water etc.

#ItWasHotTheOtherDayAndSheWasSatJustInHerNappySpittingOutHerWaterOntoHerChestAndRubbingItIn

Classic.

#SheCouldNotSwimInTheSeaSoSheHadToMakeDoWithATubOfWaterOutsideButSheHadAGreatTime

She loved it. One day it was so hot that I did not even bother drying her afterwards and she dried fast. Her skin felt lovely and cold.

#ButYesItWasNiceToHaveAnEveningAndDayAwayForMyselfAndToSeeSoManyOldFriendsAndAcquaintancesAfterSoLong

It’s just nice to wander around and recognise so many faces.

#IKeptThinkingThatEveryoneHasBeenCarryingOnAsNormalWhileIHaveBeenAwayLookingAfterB #ButOfCourseThePandemicHasBeenDifferentForEveryoneAndItWasAStrangeExperienceForAll

Big photography events and openings just haven’t been happening.

#ILostMyVoiceAtOnePointAsIWasNotUsedToTalkingAndSpeakingLoudlySoMuch

It was good to talk about photography and life with people in real life again. Apologies to anyone that I bored talking about family life to.

#MyBumpFeltHeavyAtTimesFromAllTheWalkingAndStandingAndBeforeBoardingTrainsAndTubesIWouldRubMyBellyToShowIWasPregnant

I haven’t stood up and walked so much in a while.

#ItWasUnnecessaryThoughAsTransportWasPrettyQuietWhichWasNiceAndISatInThePregnancySeatsWithoutFeelingSuperAwkwardThoughIFeltALittleBitSo

When I lived in London I’d never sit in the priority chairs so it felt weird, apart from getting the train to and from Brum. I love the single seats that face out, and I managed to get one of them both ways, so I didn’t have to sit next to someone without a mask.

I was disappointed how many people weren’t wearing masks on public transport in London.

#ThisWeekBHadHerFirstToddlerClassAndAtTheBeginningSheJustSatByHerPushchair

I had to put her by the mat and all the kids.

#IGuessItWasWeirdForHerAsSheHadGoneFromBeingTheOldestToOneOfTheYoungest

It’s nice to be at a more age appropriate class though, as the other one was getting boring.

#SheHadAlsoNotBeenAroundSoManyYoungPeopleInAWhileSoItMustHaveBeenALotToTakeIn #ItWillBeGoodForHerThoughAndSheWillLearnALotFromTheOlderOnes

It was a settling in class for both of us. Hopefully she will feel more at home next week, and we can try to meet some people.

#IAmHopingToJustTakeBabyXAlongToBsClassesAfterTheyAreBorn

Fingers crossed. Tiago can take B when he is on paternity leave, and then hopefully I’d feel comfortable enough to take them both.

#IAmTryingToMakeAnEffortToMeetMoreLocalMumsWhoAreAlsoPregnantViaThoseAwkwardMumApps

I’ve spent a lot of time talking to Mums over the last year, but not much comes out of it. It’s worse than dating.

#MyThinkingIsTheyWillBeOnMaternityLeaveSoWillHopefullyWantToHangOutAndWeCanPassTheLongWeekdaysTogetherAtTimes

Especially those who have an older kid as they will hopefully feel more comfortable going out. I’m not being picky though, I’d just like more weekday friends.

19 weeks pregnant with B comparison:

Self-portrait from my head to my knees. I'm dressed all in black and some of my hair is draped over my left arm, which is resting on my head.
The Other Day I Thought I Could Feel The Baby Moving (19 and a half weeks)
 
#TheOtherDayIThoughtICouldFeelTheBabyMoving
#ItFeltLikePopcornLightlyPopping
#ButAgainItCouldHaveBeenWishfulThinking
#TheNightBeforeIHadHadADreamThatINeededToFlushPeoplesRingsDownTheToilet
#OtherwiseSomethingReallyBadWouldHappenToMe
#ItWasASuperStressfulDream
#MeanwhileTiagoWasDreamingThatTheBabyWasCryingInItsCot
#SoHePickedItUpAndSangToItAndSettledIt
#AndThereWasAVeryBabylikeDollInTheCotToo
#BesidesFromTheCreepyDollItSoundsLikeAMuchBetterDream
#IHaveBeenFeelingABitBetterInTheLastFewDays
#IThinkTheCrampsWereProbablyTheBabyJustGrowingAndMyBodyDoingItsThing
#ButIAlsoThinkItMayHaveBeenTrappedWindAndThingsLikeThat
#CharmingButTrue
#ItHasBeenNiceNotGettingMenstrualCrampsForAWhile
#MyPeriodTrackerAppSaysMyPeriodIs111DaysLate
#MyCoughSeemsToHaveReturnedAlreadyWhichIsABitAnnoying
#PeopleAlwaysAskMeAboutIfIHaveCravings
#NotReallyThoughIHavePizzaToastInsteadOfCheeseAndPickleSandwichesWhenPossibleNow
#IThinkItIsMoreMeJustLettingMyselfEatWhatIWantRatherThanCravings
#IAmNotSureIfIMentionedItBeforeButOneDayISawAVanThatSaidWFSOnIt
#AndIWasLikeMmmWaffles
#TheOtherDayTiagoWasWatchingEvertonFootballHighlights
#AndTheirShirtsMadeMeWantCheeseAndOnionCrisps
#SoIGuessWeirdThingsTriggerCravings
#ThoughIDoNotUsuallyEatTheThingsIThinkAbout
#TheCravingsAreNormallyQuiteImpulsive
#LikeIWantItNowAndIfItWasEasilyAttainableThenIProbablyWouldEatItThenAndThere
#ThoughIAmTryingNotToEatTooUnhealthily
#INeedToEatMoreCalciumWhichIsWhyIDoNotFeelBadAboutEatingSomeCheddarEveryDay

I had forgot about describing kicks as popcorn popping. It just felt more ticklish this time and then quickly moved onto stronger movements.

My dreams have been intense lately (mid-October), but I don’t like when I have them as they tire me out.

I had a phase of being quite into vinegary crisps this time, but it passed. I have been enjoying beetroot and pickled red cabbage lately though (in a wrap with other things), and I did have a lot of vinegar on my chips at dinner today. But I was a fan of vinegar before being pregnant – I just usually don’t choose salt and vinegar crisps over other flavours though. Exciting stuff.

I have been making banana bread a lot lately and I put a lot of yoghurt on that, so I guess that’s my calcium sorted.


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Categories
Pregnancy Waiting II

Imitating B Dancing (14 Weeks / 8th August 2021)

Me with my right arm in front of my body imitating B dancing.
Imitating B Dancing (14 Weeks / 8th August 2021)
 
#BHasStartedToDanceMoreToSongsWhichIsReallyNiceToSee
#SheUsuallyDoesALotOfIntricateSteppingButSheAlsoPutsHerRightArmInFrontOfHerAtTimes
#BIsConstantlyKneeingMeInTheStomachOrUsingMyBellyAsALeaningPost
#ObviouslySheDoesNotKnowWhatSheIsDoingButItDoesFreakMeOutABit
#SheHasStartedToDoHerSuperCheekySmileAgainWhichMakesMeLaugh
#SheDoesItALotWhileSheRidesOnHerZebraWhichSheCanClimbOnAndPlayWithByHerselfNow
#ThoughSheLikesToScareMeByActingABitLikeAStuntRiderAndStandingUpOnIt
#WeHaveStartedToGiveHerHerMilkAtTheEndOfMealsNow
#BeforeWeWouldGiveItHerAtTheStartOfMealsAndSheWouldJustDrinkItAllUntilItWasGone
#IAmHopingThisMeansSheWillEatMoreNowAndSleepBetter
#ThoughThisMorningSheWasUpSuperEarlySoMaybeNot
#WeUsuallyGiveHerSomeGreekStyleYoghurtBeforeBedtimeButInTheLastFewDaysIHaveBeenStrugglingToEvenLookAtIt
#IDoNotKnowWhyButMyBodyIsRepulsedByItAndItMakesMeWantToMeSick
#IAmStillStrugglingWithBrushingMyTeethAtNightThoughIHaveNotBeenSickInSixDays
#IHaveAnnouncedThatIAmPregnantNowWhichIsMaybeTooEarlyButItIsWhatItIs
#EveryCrampWorriesMeButIGuessMyBodyHasALotOfStretchingToDoAndItHasToCleanItself
#WhenIWasPregnantWithBIAteALotOfJacketPotatoesButIAmYetToHaveOneWithThisPregnancy
#IAmQuiteIntoBeetrootAtTheMomentAndAnythingVinegaryReally
#MyMainConcernCurrentlyThoughIsItIsAWeekUntilOurHolidayAndNotGettingCovidBeforeWeGo
#IDoNotThinkWeHaveHadItYetButKnowingOurLuckWeWillGetItThisWeek
#LastWeekBAndIMetUpWithAFriendAndHerBabyAndIWasTryingToKeepMyDistance
#OfCourseIAmSuperCarefulButThenBGoesAndTriesToDrinkFromTheirWaterBottlesAndCups
#WeJustNeedThisTrip
#TiagoNeedsABreakAndHeWantsToSeeHisParentsAndHisFriends
#INeedABreakAndIWantBToMeetHerGrandparentsAndIWantToSwimInTheSeaAndHaveSomeChangeToOurGroundhogDays
#OfCourseIAmAlsoLookingForwardToSeeingLotsOfPeopleWhoIHaveNotSeenInTwoYears
#IHaveBeenFeelingQuiteLonelyAndBoredOfTheMonotonySoItWillBeNiceToSeePeopleAndHaveAHolidaySimilarButNotEntirelyTheSameAsThoseWeUsedToHaveEverySummer
#IWonderIfIWillEverMakeMoreFriendsHereButAllICanDoIsTryMyBest
#YesterdayWeWentForAWalkAndWeSawSoManyBabiesAndToddlersThatIAmNotSureWhereTheyAllCameFrom
#WeAreAllEnjoyingOurNewBedroomHangoutAtLeastAndItHelpsMixTheDaysUpABit

#BHasStartedToDanceMoreToSongsWhichIsReallyNiceToSee

We do listen to music a lot, and she sees me dancing.

Yesterday T brought her upstairs while I was doing my dance videos and I could see B trying to copy my arm actions.

#SheUsuallyDoesALotOfIntricateSteppingButSheAlsoPutsHerRightArmInFrontOfHerAtTimes

It makes me think of a photo I took for my OMOM project –

I like when I put a song on and she just starts moving around. She was moving fast to ‘I’m Still Standing’ by Elton John the other day. Sometimes she flaps her arms to songs too.

#BIsConstantlyKneeingMeInTheStomachOrUsingMyBellyAsALeaningPost #ObviouslySheDoesNotKnowWhatSheIsDoingButItDoesFreakMeOutABit

I guess the womb is built to be resilient, but I barely knocked my belly at all when I was pregnant with B. A cat walked over it once, which made me worried, but B does a lot worse to it on the daily.

#SheHasStartedToDoHerSuperCheekySmileAgainWhichMakesMeLaugh

I love it. Just super big cheesy grin with her little teeth showing more now.

#SheDoesItALotWhileSheRidesOnHerZebraWhichSheCanClimbOnAndPlayWithByHerselfNow

I say ‘giddy up’ and she goes for it.

#ThoughSheLikesToScareMeByActingABitLikeAStuntRiderAndStandingUpOnIt

I blame all this watching of the Olympics. I’ve watched so much of it this year, but today is the last day. I’m a bit relieved, though I do want to watch the Paralympics. I’m a bit sports out though – luckily I’ve just seen that it doesn’t start for 2+ weeks.

#WeHaveStartedToGiveHerHerMilkAtTheEndOfMealsNow #BeforeWeWouldGiveItHerAtTheStartOfMealsAndSheWouldJustDrinkItAllUntilItWasGone

Though now she just drinks it until it’s gone when she gets it.

#IAmHopingThisMeansSheWillEatMoreNowAndSleepBetter #ThoughThisMorningSheWasUpSuperEarlySoMaybeNot

Fun times.

#WeUsuallyGiveHerSomeGreekStyleYoghurtBeforeBedtimeButInTheLastFewDaysIHaveBeenStrugglingToEvenLookAtIt

When Tiago is busy/out and I have to give it her by myself, geez I really struggle. Yesterday just thinking about it made me want to vomit.

#IDoNotKnowWhyButMyBodyIsRepulsedByItAndItMakesMeWantToMeSick

I do not remember being this grossed out by it last time. I’ve been eating it for breakfast with turkish eggs here and there as well… I think the evenings are just not good for me.

#IAmStillStrugglingWithBrushingMyTeethAtNightThoughIHaveNotBeenSickInSixDays

I’ve been close though. The dry heaving is not much fun, especially as it leaves my stomach feeling unsettled for a bit.

#IHaveAnnouncedThatIAmPregnantNowWhichIsMaybeTooEarlyButItIsWhatItIs

Not that anyone cares, but it feels like a big step with it all.

#EveryCrampWorriesMeButIGuessMyBodyHasALotOfStretchingToDoAndItHasToCleanItself

I get worried a few times during the day. Sometimes it is just gas though… Classy.

#WhenIWasPregnantWithBIAteALotOfJacketPotatoesButIAmYetToHaveOneWithThisPregnancy

I guess I was going to the office then and it was an easy lunch solution as local cafes sold them. Thinking about it I would like a jacket potato with coleslaw now… It’s not even 8am. I feel like I ate baked beans last time, but I have not been able to touch them lately.

(15th October: I had one last weekend and it was great. Earlier I said to Tiago that we should have them for lunch this weekend.)

#IAmQuiteIntoBeetrootAtTheMomentAndAnythingVinegaryReally

I do not usually eat salt and vinegar crisps, but I am a fan at the moment.

#MyMainConcernCurrentlyThoughIsItIsAWeekUntilOurHolidayAndNotGettingCovidBeforeWeGo #IDoNotThinkWeHaveHadItYetButKnowingOurLuckWeWillGetItThisWeek

I am quite concerned. My social calendar is empty this week though – I just need to go to the doctors for an early 16 week check.

#LastWeekBAndIMetUpWithAFriendAndHerBabyAndIWasTryingToKeepMyDistance

I debated saying let’s leave it until after our holiday, but we’d missed her 1st birthday party and I do not see many people.

#OfCourseIAmSuperCarefulButThenBGoesAndTriesToDrinkFromTheirWaterBottlesAndCups

Argh. Hopefully it’ll be okay. They’ve yet to tell us they have Covid so…

#WeJustNeedThisTrip

Need or want? A lot of other people probably want or need a trip too. If it wasn’t for it being where Tiago grew up we’d just be going somewhere in the UK I’m sure. It’d be a lot less stressful.

#TiagoNeedsABreakAndHeWantsToSeeHisParentsAndHisFriends

True, he could have a break in the UK. Seeing his parents and friends is a big thing though. We last saw his parents at Xmas 2019, but in mainland Portugal rather than on the island.

#INeedABreakAndIWantBToMeetHerGrandparentsAndIWantToSwimInTheSeaAndHaveSomeChangeToOurGroundhogDays

So many wants and needs.

#OfCourseIAmAlsoLookingForwardToSeeingLotsOfPeopleWhoIHaveNotSeenInTwoYears

I want to see my parents in law as well, and see the people we usually see every summer.

#IHaveBeenFeelingQuiteLonelyAndBoredOfTheMonotonySoItWillBeNiceToSeePeopleAndHaveAHolidaySimilarButNotEntirelyTheSameAsThoseWeUsedToHaveEverySummer

Lonely when I’m with B all day? Sounds rude, but if you’re a parent I’m sure you know what I mean. It’ll be different when she can talk. It’s just weird that I have so much ‘free time’ (time where I could be hanging out with people) now and I do not really see anyone. Maybe it’ll be different when the summer holidays are over and we start classes again.

#IWonderIfIWillEverMakeMoreFriendsHereButAllICanDoIsTryMyBest

We are not planning to stay here forever, so soon it will get to the point of why bother trying to meet people. Maybe I’m just socially awkward. Maybe I’m just not a very likeable person. Maybe I’m just annoying. Maybe I have little in common with people around here. Maybe maybe maybe.

#YesterdayWeWentForAWalkAndWeSawSoManyBabiesAndToddlersThatIAmNotSureWhereTheyAllCameFrom

I recognised a couple of them, but there was a lot I’d never seen before.

#WeAreAllEnjoyingOurNewBedroomHangoutAtLeastAndItHelpsMixTheDaysUpABit

Now we can hang out downstairs, in our room, go for walks… It’s raining again. I’m so fed up with this weather. I do wonder how things would be if it wasn’t for Covid. I’m sure I’d be taking B out more – hanging out at coffee shops, there’d be more classes/groups perhaps, I wouldn’t be so scared of taking her to soft play etc. Oh well.

14 weeks pregnant with B comparison:

Self-portrait with my top lifted up so my belly is on show. I am staring down at it.
Don’t Touch My Belly (14 and a half weeks)
 
#14AndAHalfWeeks
#IWentToWrite13AndThenIHadToThinkAboutIt
#IAmTryingToNotMakeEveryPhotoShootAboutMyBellyButItIsKindOfWhereTheActionIsHappening
#IDefinitelyHaveABumpNow
#EvenIfSomeOfItIsFoodAndTrappedWind
#ThereIsDefinitelyABellyGrowingThereSlowly
#TheChildWillBeHalfPortuguese
#WellTiagoIsABritishCitizenNowSoHeIsPortugueseBritishSoThatMessesUpTheMathsABit
#ButToMeTheChildWillBeHalfPortuguese
#AndHopefullyOneDayIWillGetPortugueseCitizenship
#ButAnywaysThePortugueseCultureIsABitDifferentToTheBritish
#TheyAreVeryTouchyInGeneral
#ThisWeekIHeardStoriesOfRandomPeopleTouchingYourBump
#ItIsBadEnoughHavingMyPortugueseFamilyTryingToTouchIt
#IToldOneMemberOffAndOnOurGoodbyeSheWentForIt
#EspeciallyAsISpentTheVisitBeingSoIllAndSickAndGrim
#AndIHaveNeverBeenFondOfMyStomachAnyways
#SoHavingItTouchedByPeopleIsSoAwkwardForMe
#AFriendAtLunchReachedOutAndTouchedAndIJustSatThereStillInShock
#TiagoToldThemToBeCarefulAsIBite
#IAmLikingHavingABumpAndIAmLookingForwardToSeeingItGrow
#IJustDoNotLikeAllTheAttentionThatItBrings
#IAmThinkingThatIfPeopleTouchMyBellyThenIWillHaveToTouchTheirsBackToSendAMessage
#YeahAwkwardAndAHalf
#IWouldNotTouchPeoplesBelliesWithoutAsking
#NotThatIWouldThinkOfAskingEitherAsItIsAllAwkwardToMe
#HoweverWhenAFriendWasPregnantACoupleOfYearsAgoTheBabyWasKickingAndSheAskedMeIfIWantedToFeel
#BecauseSheAskedMeAndIWasIntriguedISaidYes
#SoMaybeIMightInvitePeopleToTouchMyBellyAtSomePointButPleaseDoNotTouchItOrAskMeTo
#AsIHateSayingNoButIProbablyWillAndThenWeWillBothFeelAwkwardWhichIsNotNice

I definitely took more bare belly shots when I was pregnant with B. I guess this project is different as a lot of it is me imitating B, so I do not have as much time for belly shots.

I avoided a lot of belly touching with B due to Covid. I’ve had a few people touching it lately without asking and my blanket response is usually ‘you’re touching my lunch’. The same family member was touching my belly on our trip and I had to tell her no again. It was awkward, but I don’t like it.

I still wouldn’t touch someone’s bump without asking, but I also don’t feel the need to touch someone’s belly or bump. It’s quite weird to be honest.

I don’t think I ever invited someone to touch my bump other than Tiago, but then again I was heavily pregnant during the first UK lockdown.

I do try to get B to ‘engage’ with my bump, but she doesn’t get it. I do look forward to her sibling kicking and B being able to see the kicks/feel them. I can just imagine her laughing…


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Categories
Pregnancy Waiting II

General Documenting Pregnancy Shoot II (13 Weeks / 1st August 2021)

I'm kneeling on the floor in my bra and leggings. I am holding my arms behind my back. My bump is slightly bigger than a similar photo I took before.
General Documenting Pregnancy Shoot II (13 Weeks / 1st August 2021)
 
#WellMyMainNewsIsThatIFinallyGotMyFirstVaccine
#MyMumTookMeWhileBNappedAndTiagoWorked
#TheNurseAskedIfIHadAnyConcernsAndIJustSaidIAmPregnantThoughItShowedItQuiteClearlyOnThePaperIHadToFillIn
#SheSaidToTalkToTheDoctorAndHeWasJustLikeIHaveVaccinatedEveryoneFromFourWeeksToPeopleWhoAreBreastfeedingIHaveNoConcerns
#ISaidAboutTheResearchIHadDoneAndHeSaidIProbablyKnewMoreThanHimAnyways
#IWasGoingToGetItButIJustWantedToSeeWhatTheNurseAndDoctorThoughtAsIKnowSomePeopleHaveBeenTurnedAwayOrAdvisedAgainstIt
#TheyAskedWhichArmIWantedItInAndIOfferedMyLeftButThenChangedItForMyRight
#IMainlyCarryBInMyLeftArmSoThoughtThatWasABetterOption
#TheDoctorInjectedItAndThenLeftSwiftlyAsIThinkHeWasJustGoingRoomToRoom
#TheNurseSaidToPutMyFeetUpForTheRestOfTheDayAndILaughedAsBDoesNotStop
#IHadToWaitFifteenMinutesAndWasRelievedThatTheRoomUpstairsWasFullSoIGotToWaitOutsideInTheTent
#WeWentToALargeSupermarketOnTheWayHomeAndICanNotRememberTheLastTimeIWentInOne
#IBasicallyBoughtAllTheThingsThatIHaveBeenCravingForAges
#IFeelSoRelievedToHaveGottenTheVaccineThoughIAmAlsoCountingDownUntilICanHaveMySecondInLessThanEightWeeks
#MyArmWasVeryHeavyTheFirstNightWhichIThinkWasAggravatedFromCarryingBAbout
#TheNextDayItWasLessSoAndNowIAmBackToBeingAbleToStretchProperlyWhichIsGood
#IHaveHadSomeHeadachesAndBeenQuiteTiredButThatMightAlsoBeDownToChasingAroundAnActiveToddlerAndBeingPregnantAsTheyAreNotNewFeelingsForMe
#IWasGoingToSayTheOtherDayThatIFeelLikeThePrimeMinisterStoppedCaringAboutPregnantPeopleWhenHisNowWifeGaveBirthButItTurnsOutSheIsPregnantAgain
#OurPregnancyJourneysHaveBeenFairlySimilarByTheSoundsOfIt
#TheResultsOfTheNeckTissueCheckAndBloodTestForSyndromesCameBackInThreeDaysAndIAmVeryLowRisk
#IThoughtIWouldNotFindOutUntilALotLaterAsLastTimeIDidNotKnowUntil21Weeks
#ButThenIRememberedThatTheLetterGotLostInThePostLastTimeAndIEndedUpHavingToPhoneSomeoneWhenIRealisedIShouldHaveReallyHeardByThen
#TheOtherDayIHadToCallToBookAMidwifeAppointmentForSixteenWeeksAsIWillMissMineAndTheWomanWhoTookMyBloodsToldMeTo
#IHadBeenPuttingItOffAsIWasNotReallySureWhatIWasAskingForButTheWomanOnReceptionGotItAfterAWhileAndItIsBookedNow
#MyBreakfastBurritoCravingWentAwayButNowIJustHaveAScrambledEggAndHashbrownToastedSandwichForBreakfastWhichIsGreat
#IHadNotBeenSickForFourDaysButThenIAteSoMuchBakedCamembertYesterdayThatMyBodyWasSoUpset
#IWasSickAgainTwentyMinutesLaterAndIEvenSearchedForHowToGetRidOfTheTasteOfSickInYourMouth
#IHadAShowerAndBlewMyNoseAndGargledALotAndDrankALotOfWaterAndChangedMyClothesAndItHelpedALot
#MyNewThingWithBIsBeforeIPutHerDownForANapOrBedtimeIsIMassageMoisturiserIntoHerFeetAsSheIsGenerallyBareFootAndTheyGetDry
#IAlsoDoHerLegsAndItSeemsToReallyChillHerOutAndSometimesSheNearlyFallsAsleepSoINeedToLearnMoreAboutFullBodyToddlerMassage

(The image is a remake of this shoot:

I'm kneeling on the floor in my bra and leggings. I am holding my arms behind my back. I have a small bump.
General Documenting Pregnancy Shoot (9 Weeks? / 28th June 2021)

)

Well, I seem to have written an essay again…

#WellMyMainNewsIsThatIFinallyGotMyFirstVaccine

After all the um-ing and ah-ing, this Instagram Live really sold it to me. The advice has been quite inconsistent until now (GP said to get it when I said I was pregnant, midwives said to wait until 16 weeks etc.)

#MyMumTookMeWhileBNappedAndTiagoWorked

I don’t drive, not keen on getting public transport (especially while pregnant and not vaccinated), and all the places giving jabs are far away. I booked it for when my Mum usually visits, and when B naps so it worked out well. Thanks Mum.

#TheNurseAskedIfIHadAnyConcernsAndIJustSaidIAmPregnantThoughItShowedItQuiteClearlyOnThePaperIHadToFillIn

A paper with lots of yes or no questions – have you tested positive for Covid in the last 28 days, have you had another vaccine in the last 7 days etc etc.

#SheSaidToTalkToTheDoctorAndHeWasJustLikeIHaveVaccinatedEveryoneFromFourWeeksToPeopleWhoAreBreastfeedingIHaveNoConcerns

He looked like he had been giving the same speech a lot lately, as he seemed so bored while saying it.

I have to add that this place was so organised and they knew what they were doing, but I guess they have been giving them for a while.

#ISaidAboutTheResearchIHadDoneAndHeSaidIProbablyKnewMoreThanHimAnyways #IWasGoingToGetItButIJustWantedToSeeWhatTheNurseAndDoctorThoughtAsIKnowSomePeopleHaveBeenTurnedAwayOrAdvisedAgainstIt

They were both very much for it. The nurse was talking about it giving me a peace of mind and stuff, which it has.

#TheyAskedWhichArmIWantedItInAndIOfferedMyLeftButThenChangedItForMyRight #IMainlyCarryBInMyLeftArmSoThoughtThatWasABetterOption

I did briefly panic looking between my two arms. I thought I’d made a mistake with my right, but I also mainly sleep on my left so it worked out well. Hurrah.

#TheDoctorInjectedItAndThenLeftSwiftlyAsIThinkHeWasJustGoingRoomToRoom

Busy man. Nurse to input information from the form. Doctor to just go round injecting lots of people.

#TheNurseSaidToPutMyFeetUpForTheRestOfTheDayAndILaughedAsBDoesNotStop

She did say ‘if you can’ as I had told her about B.

#IHadToWaitFifteenMinutesAndWasRelievedThatTheRoomUpstairsWasFullSoIGotToWaitOutsideInTheTent

I didn’t fancy being in a small room, even with social distancing. I was surprised how many people were turning up without masks, but they were quickly asked where it was and given a disposable one. The tent downstairs was very airy and I sat by a doorway.

#WeWentToALargeSupermarketOnTheWayHomeAndICanNotRememberTheLastTimeIWentInOne #IBasicallyBoughtAllTheThingsThatIHaveBeenCravingForAges

I did go a bit nuts… Small pleasures.

#IFeelSoRelievedToHaveGottenTheVaccineThoughIAmAlsoCountingDownUntilICanHaveMySecondInLessThanEightWeeks

I know it needs time to really work, but I do feel a bit more relaxed now.

#MyArmWasVeryHeavyTheFirstNightWhichIThinkWasAggravatedFromCarryingBAbout #TheNextDayItWasLessSoAndNowIAmBackToBeingAbleToStretchProperlyWhichIsGood

I was a bit worried about how I might react and thought that maybe I should have waited for the weekend, but it was fine.

#IHaveHadSomeHeadachesAndBeenQuiteTiredButThatMightAlsoBeDownToChasingAroundAnActiveToddlerAndBeingPregnantAsTheyAreNotNewFeelingsForMe

I have not been napping so much now that my energy is back a bit, so I usually get a headache by the evening which probably isn’t helped by a lot of screen time. Yesterday I couldn’t get up from my afternoon nap, but I had been up since 5.15am and didn’t nap in the morning…

#IWasGoingToSayTheOtherDayThatIFeelLikeThePrimeMinisterStoppedCaringAboutPregnantPeopleWhenHisNowWifeGaveBirthButItTurnsOutSheIsPregnantAgain #OurPregnancyJourneysHaveBeenFairlySimilarByTheSoundsOfIt

She had a kid in April 2020, I had a kid in June 2020, we both had miscarriages at the start of the year, she is due in December, I’m due in February…

#TheResultsOfTheNeckTissueCheckAndBloodTestForSyndromesCameBackInThreeDaysAndIAmVeryLowRisk

I don’t know what I would do if I was high risk for something, but luckily I do not have to think about it now I have my results.

#IThoughtIWouldNotFindOutUntilALotLaterAsLastTimeIDidNotKnowUntil21Weeks #ButThenIRememberedThatTheLetterGotLostInThePostLastTimeAndIEndedUpHavingToPhoneSomeoneWhenIRealisedIShouldHaveReallyHeardByThen

It’s one of the reasons why I took so long to announce my pregnancy last time, as I was not sure what we would do if I tested high risk for something. I am guessing I will announce my pregnancy the week after next, though I generally tell anyone that I am chatting to (if I remember). Especially when I see someone in person, as that never happens…

#TheOtherDayIHadToCallToBookAMidwifeAppointmentForSixteenWeeksAsIWillMissMineAndTheWomanWhoTookMyBloodsToldMeTo #IHadBeenPuttingItOffAsIWasNotReallySureWhatIWasAskingForButTheWomanOnReceptionGotItAfterAWhileAndItIsBookedNow

I tried to book an appointment online, but I could not see the option so I felt awkward about having to call. I think it was for the best that I did. I’m glad that’s sorted now though.

#MyBreakfastBurritoCravingWentAwayButNowIJustHaveAScrambledEggAndHashbrownToastedSandwichForBreakfastWhichIsGreat

I am getting hungry now writing this – it’s 7.10am.

#IHadNotBeenSickForFourDaysButThenIAteSoMuchBakedCamembertYesterdayThatMyBodyWasSoUpset

I am not really sure if I am ‘allowed’ to eat it, as some websites said no, and some said to make sure it’s really hot. I bought the camembert and garlic bread during my cravings trip.

#IWasSickAgainTwentyMinutesLaterAndIEvenSearchedForHowToGetRidOfTheTasteOfSickInYourMouth

I will not be eating camembert again for a while now. The combo of that and the garlic bread… ergh.

#IHadAShowerAndBlewMyNoseAndGargledALotAndDrankALotOfWaterAndChangedMyClothesAndItHelpedALot

I was sick twice. I ate dinner. The taste still lingered. It was grim. It’s worse when it’s just before bed though… Sorry if I’ve put you off your snack or whatever you may be consuming right now.

#MyNewThingWithBIsBeforeIPutHerDownForANapOrBedtimeIsIMassageMoisturiserIntoHerFeetAsSheIsGenerallyBareFootAndTheyGetDry

Sorry B, you’ve barely been mentioned in this post. I do it at least once a day and her legs are definitely quite soft now.

#IAlsoDoHerLegsAndItSeemsToReallyChillHerOutAndSometimesSheNearlyFallsAsleepSoINeedToLearnMoreAboutFullBodyToddlerMassage

I wish I had a massage before bedtime, but oh well. She seems to enjoy it and I sing to her softly or talk quietly. It’s a nice moment between us 🙂

13 weeks pregnant with B comparison:

Self-portrait in my bra and trousers. I have a bandage on my right arm from a blood test. In my left hand I am holding a tissue and I am coughing. My nose is a bit red.
My Due Date Got Put Back To Its Original One (Nearly 13 Weeks)
 
#SoIHadMy12WeekScanToday
#AndTheyPutMeBackToMyOriginalDueDate
#WhichMeansIAmNearly13Weeks
#TheAppointmentWasQuiteEarlyInTheMorning
#WhichIsGoodForGettingOnWithTheDay
#ButBadIfYouAreSupposedToDrink2PintsOfWaterAnHourBefore
#AsWellAsEatWhenYouHaveMorningSickness
#IDidNotDrinkEnoughSoHeCouldNotTakeMeasurementsProperly 
#ButHeCheckedThatThereWere2ArmsAnd2Legs
#AndWeWereRelievedToSeeAHeartbeatAsIHaveBeenIll
#TheGuyWasABitAnnoyedButHeSaidToGoDrinkWaterAndHeWouldTryToSeeMeIn40MinutesOrSo
#SoIWentAndDrankALotOfWaterButNotTooMuchThatIfIWaited40MinutesThenIWouldNeedTheToiletBadly
#After25MinsHeCameOutAndSaidTheNextPersonHadNotShowedUpSoWeCouldTryAgain
#INeededTheToilet
#HeSaysMyWombSeemsQuiteLowDownInGeneralSoINeedToDrinkMoreForScans
#HeManagedToTakeTheMeasurementsAndToldMeMyNewOldDueDate
#ThenIHadToHaveBloodsTakenAgain
#ItHurtWayMoreThanTheOtherTimes
#GoodJobIHadDrankALotOfWaterAndManagedToEat
#ItCameOutQuiteEasily
#TheWomanWasNice
#SheSaidSomeoneCalledAndSaidTheyHadNorovirusButWantedToKnowIfTheyCouldComeInAnyways
#IAmGladSheToldThemNo
#IAmBoredOfBeingIllAndSick
#ThisMorningWasSickNumber42
#IFeltSoSickThisEveningToo
#MorningSicknessIsSoMuchBetterThanEveningSickness
#IAmRelievedThatTheBabyIsFineButIAmAlsoFeelingAnxiousToo
#HopefullyTheScreeningResultsAreOkay
#IGuessWeJustHaveToWaitAndSee

Well, these photos actually fit well together. I guess I’m posting these comparisons a bit out of sync now and I’ll have to add another one to try to realign things.

I should have posted this image in the last post as it mentions the guy getting annoyed at me for not drinking enough water…

From the post: ‘#WithMyTwelveWeekAppointmentWithBIGotToldOffForNotHavingAFullEnoughBladderAndGotSentToDrinkMoreWater I still remember his annoyed face. I had not wanted to have a situation where I felt like I was going to piss myself, but obviously I was nowhere near that – plus the appointment was on time then.’

I have definitely been less sick this time – I had a period of really trying not to be sick. This post mentions being sick for the 42nd time. I was sick about 56 times in total (that’s the number I documented in Puke Portraits), whereas Puke Portraits II is 32 images.

Close up of three of my fingers on my skin next to a bruise.
90% Of My Social Media Advertising Now Is To Do With Pregnancy (Nearly 13 Weeks)
 
#ThisMorningINoticedThatIHadABigBruiseOnTheSideOfMyBumSlashTopOfMyHip
#ThenINoticedSomeStretchMarks
#TheStretchMarksMightJustBeFromMyUsualChangingWeightAndExercisingAsIHaveHadThemThereBefore
#OrItCouldBeDoToPregnancyOrABitOfBoth
#NinetyPercentOfMySocialMediaAdvertisingNowIsToDoWithPregnancy
#AndALotOfItIsToDoWithGettingRidOfStretchMarks
#EvenAtTheHospitalYesterdayThereWasAScreenWithAdvertisingOnItAndTheyWereTryingToSellSomeStretchMarkReductionDevice
#IFilledInSomeSurveyTodayToDoWithBodyImageAndPregnancy
#ToBeFairIAmQuiteEarlyAlongButItWasTalkingAboutThePressuresToLookGoodAndHowIFeltBeforePregnancyVersusNow
#ItWasBoringAsHellAndIWasSadToSeeThereWasNoOtherCommentsBox
#IWantedToTalkAboutThePressureIFeelAlreadyToNotHaveStretchMarksAndWhatever
#SomeoneAlreadyBoughtMeSomeBodyMassageStuffToHelpPreventThem
#WhichDoesSmellNiceAndFeelsNice
#ButIWeirdlyWantToHaveSomeStretchMarksOrAtLeastIFeelThatWayRightNow
#MaybeThatIsDumbButIHaveAlwaysCalledThemTigerStripes
#ThoughToBeFairThereAreTheLittleOnesAndThereAreThoseBigRedOnesWhichActuallyLookPainfulSoYeahIDoNotWantThoseOnesReally
#InTheLastWeekOnFacebookIHaveHadAdsForPregnancyForBabyStuffForToddlerStuffForIVFStuffForDoIWantToDonateEggsStuffForDoIWantToBeASurrogateStuff
#ItIsABitBloodyMuch
#YesIAmSavingLinksToThingsAndOnInstagramThoughIDoNotWantToBuyAnythingUntil6MonthsAlong
#INeverNoticedBeforeHowFrequentAdsAreOnInstagram
#Every3Or4PostsOrStoriesWhichJustFeelsABitMuch
#SuperExpensiveBabyStuffOrReallyExpensiveClothes
#OrPuttingPressureOnWomenToLookACertainWayDuringPregnancyOrStraightAfter
#IHaveReadThatStretchMarksAreDownToGeneticsMoreThanAnythingAndALotOfProductsHaveNotBeenClinicallyProvenToWork
#ThereWasAnAdForADeviceToHelpYouGetAFlatStomachAfterBirthOnFacebook
#TheWomanLookedLikeYourUsualSmallModelAndHadASmallBump
#MostOfTheCommentsWereJustComplainingAboutHowTheWomenInTheseAdsAreAlwaysTinyAnyways
#IJustWantToSeeMorePositiveThingsAboutStretchMarksAndAfterPregnancy
#IWouldRatherHaveAdsForOtherThingsLikeFoodOrHolidaysOrThingsICanIgnoreButObviouslyThatIsNotHowAdvertisingWorks
#IRealiseThatThisPictureIsMoreAboutMyBruiseThanStretchMarks

I haven’t really noticed too many stretch marks this time, but I also haven’t really been looking for them. I’ve been using the same oil that I used last time though, as well as another one that I bought for after I gave birth but only opened last week.

I have felt less pressure about my body this time. Maybe it’s because I do not really see many people, but also I try to go out once or twice a day and I stretch in the morning and evening. My body feels strong and I know there is not much more that I could be doing. I do worry that I will not have time to stretch once baby X is born, but if I can faff on social media for 5 minutes, then I can stretch.

I also didn’t have many marks after B was born, but maybe it’s because she was quite small and arrived early, so it may be different this time.


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Oh Me, Oh Pai Pregnancy Waiting II

Tiago’s Second British Father’s Day (7 Weeks? / 20th June 2021)

Tiago sat on a beanbag with B on his lap. He is looking down at her, while her face has been covered with duplicates of Tiago's thumb.
Tiago’s Second British Father’s Day (7 Weeks? / 20th June 2021)
 
#IAskedTiagoAboutHowHeFeelsAboutBeingADadTheseDaysAndHeJustSaidGood
#AfterSomeMoreDiggingHeSaidThatHeNowUnderstandsHisPlaceInTheWorldAsAHumanMore
#IGuessBWillNotBeAsStillForTheShootAsSheWasAYearAgo
#SheWasBarelyAWeekOldWhenItWasTiagosFirstFathersDay
#NowSheIsJustOnTheMoveSoMuchAndSheIsStartingToTakeMultipleSteps
#TheOtherDaySheDidAboutSixAsSheConcentratedOnMyPhoneAsIMovedIt
#YesterdaySheWalkedFromTheKitchenIntoTheLivingRoomWithoutAnyPrompt
#TheOtherDayInHerBabyClassThereWereSomeBigFakeDogsThatTheTeachersBroughtRound
#BRanOffAndSheWouldNotTouchAnyOfTheOtherToys
#SheIsTheOldestByFarNowAndSoonSheWillSoonBeTooOldForTheClass
#SheWasRandomlyHuggingTheWomanNextToUsWhoWeHadNotSpokenTo
#HerSleepHasGotWorseButICheckedAndSheIsGoingThroughALeap
#SheAlsoHadHerOneYearVaccinationsThisWeek
#IWasSayingToSomeoneThatAtLeastThereAreNotSevenJabsButThereWereFour
#TwoInEachLegAndIFeltSoBadForBWhoWasObviouslyUpset
#TheNurseWasSayingThereUsedToBeThreeAt12MonthsThenOneOneMonthLater
#ButPeopleWereJustNotTurningUpForTheSecondAppointmentOrTheKidsWouldRememberTheNeedleAndBeScared
#YesterdayBWasAwakeLoadsDuringTheNightButPrettyMuchAwakeFromFourThirty
#SheAteAllHerBreakfastAtSixSoSheMustHaveBeenHungry
#IStillFeelABitThrownOffFromUsChangingFromFormulaToMilkButTheMainDifferenceWasIDidNotGiveHerYoghurtForDessertTheNightBefore
#SheUsuallyEatsQuiteABitOfItAndIGuessItHelpsFillHerUp
#TodaySheWokeUpAtTheSameTimeButIPutTheHeatingOnAndSheSleptABitMore
#WeHaveJustKindOfAcceptedThatWeWillBeAwakeFromFiveThirtyEverydayNow
#IHaveBeenSoTiredThatIHaveBeenAsleepByTenTheLastCoupleOfNights
#MySicknessComesAndGoesAndIHaveOnlyBeenActuallySickTwoTimes
#TwoOtherTimesIWentToBeSickButNothingCameUp
#IHaveBeenEatingALotOfCheeseAndTomatoSandwiches
#TheOtherNightIHadAReallyStrongCravingForRiceAndMangoChutney
#IFeelABitNervousAboutItAllButHopefullyEverythingWillBeOkay
#IDoNotThinkThereWillEverBeAGoodTimeToHaveASecondKidSoWeWillJustHaveToDoOurBest

#IAskedTiagoAboutHowHeFeelsAboutBeingADadTheseDaysAndHeJustSaidGood

This is why I’ve stopped asking him for comments for these things.

#AfterSomeMoreDiggingHeSaidThatHeNowUnderstandsHisPlaceInTheWorldAsAHumanMore

As the shoot is about his second Father’s Day I thought I needed to at least get something else out of him.

He’s a great Dad. It’s currently 06:38 and he’s up sorting out B’s breakfast, while I’m writing this. I did start writing before 6am but B went back to sleep for 10 minutes…

#IGuessBWillNotBeAsStillForTheShootAsSheWasAYearAgo #SheWasBarelyAWeekOldWhenItWasTiagosFirstFathersDay

Oh, what a year.

#NowSheIsJustOnTheMoveSoMuchAndSheIsStartingToTakeMultipleSteps

She.Does.Not.Sit.Still. A friend came to visit yesterday and we were sat outside with her just pushing her walker up and down.

#TheOtherDaySheDidAboutSixAsSheConcentratedOnMyPhoneAsIMovedIt

She was stood up and she was looking at my phone, so I just held it at her grabbing height and kept moving it. We were sat behind the sofa so Nan and T missed it.

#YesterdaySheWalkedFromTheKitchenIntoTheLivingRoomWithoutAnyPrompt

I was glad that Nan and Tiago saw it. Both times were early evening-ish, so her legs must have enough strength by then.

#TheOtherDayInHerBabyClassThereWereSomeBigFakeDogsThatTheTeachersBroughtRound #BRanOffAndSheWouldNotTouchAnyOfTheOtherToys

I was shocked as I thought she would have grabbed them. I guess she is getting older and some safety defences are kicking in? The teachers were saying some kids just don’t like cuddly toys, but I was surprised. I think she was having a weird day as at home she wouldn’t go near her toys either.

#SheIsTheOldestByFarNowAndSoonSheWillSoonBeTooOldForTheClass

There was a baby I hadn’t noticed before who was starting to crawl, but it was their last week. It’s just B and a lot of kids half her age. She enjoys it though – besides being scared of stuffed animals.

#SheWasRandomlyHuggingTheWomanNextToUsWhoWeHadNotSpokenTo

She did keep looking at the woman’s baby, but then she just crawled off, gave her a hug, then tried to go in her handbag. Classic.

#HerSleepHasGotWorseButICheckedAndSheIsGoingThroughALeap

Great.

#SheAlsoHadHerOneYearVaccinationsThisWeek

Great great.

#IWasSayingToSomeoneThatAtLeastThereAreNotSevenJabsButThereWereFour

I thought it would be one injection for some reason.

#TwoInEachLegAndIFeltSoBadForBWhoWasObviouslyUpset

I had to try to hold her still. Her legs are a mess at the moment. She obviously tried to escape my grasp 🙁

A woman outside was saying she has twins and one watched the other one have their injections and he was off.

#TheNurseWasSayingThereUsedToBeThreeAt12MonthsThenOneOneMonthLater #ButPeopleWereJustNotTurningUpForTheSecondAppointmentOrTheKidsWouldRememberTheNeedleAndBeScared

I guess they didn’t want to overload them, but it’s easier just to get them all done on the same day. Good job my Mum comes round to visit as I think B is fine, but she says to give B paracetamol as she has a bit of a temperature. I don’t even notice so I feel bad.

#YesterdayBWasAwakeLoadsDuringTheNightButPrettyMuchAwakeFromFourThirty

Oh the joys. I tried putting the heating on but that didn’t work much.

#SheAteAllHerBreakfastAtSixSoSheMustHaveBeenHungry #IStillFeelABitThrownOffFromUsChangingFromFormulaToMilkButTheMainDifferenceWasIDidNotGiveHerYoghurtForDessertTheNightBefore #SheUsuallyEatsQuiteABitOfItAndIGuessItHelpsFillHerUp

I really need to look at her meals and change things up a bit. She does seem to be getting into her milk though, but it’s always a bit weird changing from one schedule to another. Soon it will be normal. I think her sleep isn’t helped by the leap and vaccinations…

#TodaySheWokeUpAtTheSameTimeButIPutTheHeatingOnAndSheSleptABitMore

Then she was awake from 5:30, but I went in and told her to go back to sleep. We need to be more strict with only getting her out of bed at 6. Sometimes we cave at 10 to 6. Today we were being strict and she actually fell asleep from 5:55 to 6:05. I had got my laptop out to start writing, but when she went quiet I quickly lay down again.

#WeHaveJustKindOfAcceptedThatWeWillBeAwakeFromFiveThirtyEverydayNow

Even if we don’t get her up until 6 she will be awake.

#IHaveBeenSoTiredThatIHaveBeenAsleepByTenTheLastCoupleOfNights

I seem to wake up around 4 by myself and feel quite awake, but I always want more sleep. If B gets up at 6 then we try to get her to nap from 9 to 11. Sometimes she sleeps all of it, sometimes she doesn’t. I will usually nap for most of it if I do not have much on.

#MySicknessComesAndGoesAndIHaveOnlyBeenActuallySickTwoTimes

Hurrah. I don’t want it to get worse. It’s bad enough as it is.

#TwoOtherTimesIWentToBeSickButNothingCameUp

I was relieved. I didn’t like feeling sick, so I wanted to feel better but I didn’t want to actually be sick. I gagged a couple of times and felt better. Great.

#IHaveBeenEatingALotOfCheeseAndTomatoSandwiches

Toast. Butter. Cheddar. A couple of cherry tomatoes. It seems to be enough to take the sickness away and to leave me feeling happy.

#TheOtherNightIHadAReallyStrongCravingForRiceAndMangoChutney

I don’t really like rice so that was fun/weird.

#IFeelABitNervousAboutItAllButHopefullyEverythingWillBeOkay

Last night I was going from hot to cold lots. I probably had sat outside for too long on a not very warm day.

#IDoNotThinkThereWillEverBeAGoodTimeToHaveASecondKidSoWeWillJustHaveToDoOurBest

I do worry about it, but I would rather have a second one now than leave it a few years. All we can do is our best and I’m sure it’ll all be okay.

Feeling sick now.

And then I was sick 10 minutes later…

7 weeks pregnant with B comparison:

Self-portrait with a piece of tissue wrapped around my finger.
(Dragon Fruit &) Cut To Finger (7 and a half weeks)
 
#SoInMyUlteriorMonologueProjectThereIsAPictureOfMyHandsHoldingADragonFruitWithABloodyFinger
#TheReasonWhyUlteriorMonologueIsCalledThatIsBecauseIWroteHashtagsLikeThese
#ButIDidNotAlwaysWriteWhatIAlwaysReallyWantedToWrite
#IAmWritingTheseHashtagsAWhileAfterITookThePhoto
#ThereIsNoDragonfruitInThisPicture
#ButThereIsTheCutFinger
#AndIThinkInMyEarlyPregnancyIHadAccidentsWithKnivesACoupleOfTimes
#AndThisWasTheWorstTime
#SoInTheHashtagsThatAccompanyTheDragonfruitPictureIfIHadFeltAbleToTalkAboutMyPregnancyIWouldHaveTalkedAboutBeingMoreClumsyThanNormal
#IThinkItWasJustBecauseMyBrainWasElsewhere
#WhichItShouldNotBeWhenIAmHoldingASharpKnife
#ThinkingAboutBeingPregnantAndNotBeingAbleToBelieveItProbably
#SoIHadStartedThisProjectButIWasStillWorkingOnUlteriorMonologueAsIDidNotWantToStopPostingStuff
#ButIRealisedThatINeededToTalkAboutBeingPregnant
#SoUlteriorMonologueReachedANaturalEnd
#ButIBoughtSomeTimeOnInstagramByPostingArchivePictures
#WhichIHadThoughtAboutDoingForAWhileButItGaveMeTheTimeToDoItAsILetMyPregnancyProgress
#IThinkItAnnoyedALotOfPeopleByJustPostingArchiveStuff
#ButIHaveSoMuchWorkThatIForgetIHaveHalfTheTime
#SoItWasNiceToGoThroughItAll
#ButItTookALongTimeToDo
#WhichIsWhatIWantedButByTheEndIWasBeyondDoneWithIt

It’s weird seeing myself with such long hair.

This was just an odd addition to the project where I explained Ulterior Monologue a little bit, and about buying myself time on Instagram.

I have been doing ‘dumb stuff’ at times, but I think it’s from having a toddler and being tired. I still don’t like the term ‘baby brain’.

Self-portrait of my body with a small round plaster on my left arm and a scratch on my belly.
Failed Blood Tests (7 and a half-ish weeks)
 
#SoTheyTriedToTakeMyBloodAndFailed
#ProbablyBecauseItWas10amAndIHadNotEatenYet
#AsIHadBeenSickThatMorningAndItPutMeOff
#ItSeemsSoEarlyToBeTalkingAboutOptions
#WhereIWantToGiveBirthWhenItSeemsSoEarlyAndIDoNotKnowTheFullFacts
#TheMidwifeMentionedAHomeBirth
#ILikeTheIdeaOfItButImmediatelyIJustThoughtAboutTheNeighboursAndWhatTheyWouldThink
#LivingInAFlatWithNeighboursOnMostSidesAndUpAndDownDoesNotMakeItSoAppealing
#ButIDoNotHearMuchFromThem
#ApartFromOneNeighbourWhoCoughsLoudly
#AndOnceICouldHearOneVomitingThroughTheVents
#WhichIsWhatIWorriedThisMorningWhenIWasBeingSick
#TIsWorriedAboutTheRisksOfHomeBirth
#SoINeedToFindHimSomeInfo
#OtherPeopleHaveExpressedTheirDisapproval
#WhichUpsetsMe
#AsItIsSoEarlyAndItIsNotSetInStoneYet
#ButThatIsMyPersonalPreference
#AndIAmTheOneGivingBirth
#AndIWantToFeelAsRelaxedAndComfortableAsPossibleToDoTheJobThatPeopleHaveBeenDoingForThousandsOfYears
#AsICanNotBeBotheredWithBeingSuperStressedOut
#LikeISaidMyMainConcernIsTheNeighbours
#SoLetUsHopeForAShortLabourThatIsMidDayAndNotMidNight
#ButItMightNotHappen
#MaybeIWillGoToTheHospitalOrABirthingCentre
#ABirthingPoolIsAllIReallyWant
#AsIWillNotGetASummerHolidaySoICanPretendIAmInTheSeaWhichIsWhereIFeelMostAtPeace
#FingersCrossedThatAllGoesWellFromHere
#ItAllSeemsTooEarlyButTodayMadeThingsABitMoreReal
#IDoNotKnowHowIGotTheScratchOnMyBelly

I learned a lot from all the blood tests to know to eat and drink more this time, though due to Covid my first tests were delayed anyways. They didn’t even ask me where I wanted to give birth this time. I’m also less for a homebirth as we live with my Nan, but it would be easier with not having to worry about childcare for B etc.


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Pregnancy Waiting II

Portrait Of A Mother Of A Twelve Month Old (7 Weeks? / 15th June 2021)

Self-portrait sat on the floor with legs crossed. I have a hat on that says 1 on it, and I am holding the camera of a video monitor in my right hand.
Portrait Of A Mother Of A Twelve Month Old (7 Weeks? / 15th June 2021)

#ICannotAndCanBelieveThatBIsOneYearOldItHasGoneFastInSomeWaysAndVerySlowInOtherWays
#IWroteAPoemToCelebrateHerBirthdayButItIsQuiteRubbish
#HerNewTrickIsToGargleAllHerWater
#WeTookHerOutForLunchAndSheJustSatThereGargling
#WeWentToAWildlifeParkButIThinkTiagoAndIEnjoyedItMoreThoughItWasALotForHerToTakeIn
#TiagoIsBackAtWorkNowSoINeedToAdjustToNotBeingAbleToGoOffForNapsAllTheTime
#PoorTiagoIsMoreTiredThanBeforeHeHadHisWeekOffSoIFeelBadAboutThat
#IFeelKnackeredNowAndHopeIHaveTimeForAQuickLieDownAfterThis
#WeHaveStartedToGiveBGoatsMilkInsteadOfFormulaThoughWeWillChangeToCowsMilkSoon
#TodayWasTheFirstDayOfNotGivingHerFormulaWhenSheWokeUpAndIHadToGetOnWithBreakfastPrettyQuick
#MakingFoodJustMakesMeWantToVomitButINeedToEatAsOtherwiseIFeelMoreSick
#IAmSoBoredOfFeelingSickAlready
#IWasSickForTheFirstTimeTheOtherDayButIAmTryingToAvoidItAsIHateItSoMuch
#IWasHalfWayThroughMakingBsLunchOmeletteWhenIHadToRunOut
#TiagoCameToAskTheInstructionsToFinishItInbetweenMyGags
#ItIsEitherFeelHorribleAndBeSickOrFeelSickAndEatEvenThoughIDoNotFeelLikeItAndThenFeelBetter
#IMadeBABatchOfRatatouilleThisMorningAndItReallyMadeMeFeelIllDoingIt
#EatingBeigeFoodsGenerallyMakeMeFeelBetter
#IHaveBeenGettingALotOfCravingsForReallyVinegaryChipsAndMushyPeas
#LastNightBeforeGoingToBedICouldHaveEatenACheeseAndRedOnionWhiteBap
#ReallyWateredDownJuiceSeemsToBeANewThingThatIDesire
#IDoNotLikeEatingLateButIThinkIAmGoingToHaveToOtherwiseIWillProbablyStartBeingSickInTheEvenings
#WhyArePregnantPeoplePunishedByFeelingSickAllOfTheTime
#IAmNowSayingThatIAmSevenWeeksNowAsIDoThinkItIsMoreLikelyButIJustWantToBeFurtherAlongAlready
#TiagosLaptopScreenThatBBrokeAMonthAgoSuddenlyStartedToWorkAgainSoThatIsGood
#ThisPostIsSupposedToBeAboutBTurningOneButItIsMostlyAboutMyMorningSicknessAndTiredness
#InThePictureIHopeToImitatePhotosOfBThatITookToCelebrateHerBirthday
#IGotHerAHatThatSays1OnItThoughTheySentMeOneThatSaid3OnItAtFirst
#TheOnlyThingThatWouldDistractHerWasHerBabyMonitor
#AndSheWoreAOnePieceSoIWillWearTheOneIHaveStartedToWearAgainAsIKnowIWillNotGetMuchUseOutOfItThisSummer

#ICannotAndCanBelieveThatBIsOneYearOldItHasGoneFastInSomeWaysAndVerySlowInOtherWays

My little baby who could not support her own head is now one. What. A. Year.

#IWroteAPoemToCelebrateHerBirthdayButItIsQuiteRubbish

This post was initially just going to be a poem as of course it only has 30 lines, but I did not put it into hashtag form.

Here it is for the lolz:

B You Are One!

Oh what a year, oh what a ride,

But I am so grateful to have you by my side.

This poem is already cheesy and a bit cliché,

But I thought I should write something to celebrate your first birthday.

You were born during a pandemic in the year 2020,

We stayed in hospital for four days and I ate butternut squash curry aplenty.

Your Pai was relieved to see you arrive home,

Together is better than seeing us through the small screen of our phones.

You spent your first four months in Liverpool and saw lots of the river,

Nothing much was open so all we could do was walk and dither.

Then we moved to Birmingham to live with your Great Nan,

You like lots of books but a current favourite is This Old Man.

Here you’ve learned how to crawl, babble and eat,

I think soon you’ll be walking as you’re finding your feet.

You can say Dad and duck; you do like to go to the pond,

We’re trying to work out if you’ll be a brunette or blonde.

At your baby classes you like to wander and explore,

You bang your foot in time to music on the wood of the floor.

I like when you enjoy something and so clap your hands,

We hope soon you’ll get to visit friends in far distant lands.

Maybe we’ll get to go to Portugal and meet your family there,

When you sit on the swings you like to watch people and stare.

We look forward to seeing you develop and grow,

We’re learning a lot, there’s a lot we don’t know.

We still don’t know much about what parents should do,

But we’re making the effort to find out just for you.

We’re glad you’re here, you’ll always be our little B,

We love you so much and plan to do so permanently.

Here’s to your first birthday, what a year it has been,

You’re our baby, our bunny, you’re our little queen.

The End

(23rd August: I’d completely forgotten that I wrote a poem for B….)

#HerNewTrickIsToGargleAllHerWater

Great. Take a gulp. Gargle. Take a gulp. Gargle. And repeat until the whole cup is empty.

I think she has just woken up from her nap. Fail. I had the heating on as I thought she may be cold. I’ve just put it on again. I thought that I’d been putting it on in the morning, but apparently I haven’t been. I need to try that again as she keeps waking up at 5.40am and it’s too early… She seems asleep for now.

#WeTookHerOutForLunchAndSheJustSatThereGargling

Luckily two women by us found it funny. It is funny, but it’s a bit much after 20 goes of it. I guess she is clever for working it out though…

#WeWentToAWildlifeParkButIThinkTiagoAndIEnjoyedItMoreThoughItWasALotForHerToTakeIn

Most of the animals were hiding or napping, so I don’t think B saw most of them. We only got a photo of her looking at a komodo dragon.

#TiagoIsBackAtWorkNowSoINeedToAdjustToNotBeingAbleToGoOffForNapsAllTheTime

Boo hoo hoo hoo hoo. How will I cope with two kids? Though at least I won’t be feeling sick all the time. I think/hope the first trimester is the worst.

#PoorTiagoIsMoreTiredThanBeforeHeHadHisWeekOffSoIFeelBadAboutThat

🙁

#IFeelKnackeredNowAndHopeIHaveTimeForAQuickLieDownAfterThis

If B stays asleep… It’s looking unlikely.

#WeHaveStartedToGiveBGoatsMilkInsteadOfFormulaThoughWeWillChangeToCowsMilkSoon

I did some more reading about goats milk and I think we should just move to cows milk when her carton is over. Plus just having cows milk will be easier as we can use it with all her cooking.

She seemed unsure of the milk, but now I just make sure to warm it up a little bit. I gave her 100ml before she had this nap and she probably drank 80/90 of it, so that’s good. Yesterday she didn’t drink much, but it probably didn’t help that we gave her formula in the morning. Apparently it’s sweeter?

#TodayWasTheFirstDayOfNotGivingHerFormulaWhenSheWokeUpAndIHadToGetOnWithBreakfastPrettyQuick

She was upset and I thought maybe she was hungry. She got up at 5.40am. She had some water. She had breakfast at 7am.

#MakingFoodJustMakesMeWantToVomitButINeedToEatAsOtherwiseIFeelMoreSick

I make a tomato and egg omelette/scrambled egg thing for myself with garlic powder, pepper and oregano then bung it between two pieces of buttered toast. I just have to eat it slowly. I make it for myself after B’s porridge has been pancaked and the pan is still hot. Boring info.

#IAmSoBoredOfFeelingSickAlready

Boredd.

#IWasSickForTheFirstTimeTheOtherDayButIAmTryingToAvoidItAsIHateItSoMuch #IWasHalfWayThroughMakingBsLunchOmeletteWhenIHadToRunOut

I have days where I just feel sick all day. I have started a Puke Portraits II project, but I hope to just keep it to a very small number of images. I also can’t be bothered to spend the time writing hashtags and editing the images.

#TiagoCameToAskTheInstructionsToFinishItInbetweenMyGags

Lovely.

#ItIsEitherFeelHorribleAndBeSickOrFeelSickAndEatEvenThoughIDoNotFeelLikeItAndThenFeelBetter

A friend was saying the other day that when you usually feel sick you don’t want to eat and you don’t, but with pregnancy sickness you have to eat. Yep.

#IMadeBABatchOfRatatouilleThisMorningAndItReallyMadeMeFeelIllDoingIt

I was supposed to do it yesterday but Tiago was busy and I didn’t look for the passata well enough, and I felt too sick to make it so I didn’t bother trying much harder.

#EatingBeigeFoodsGenerallyMakeMeFeelBetter

Nan got some crumpets. Great. Mini cheddars seem like a good option at the moment. Crisps in general. I’m trying to eat more nuts…

#IHaveBeenGettingALotOfCravingsForReallyVinegaryChipsAndMushyPeas

Writing this and reading this makes me want them again.

#LastNightBeforeGoingToBedICouldHaveEatenACheeseAndRedOnionWhiteBap

Not feeling that so much now. My Nan bought some baps and made a cheese and tomato one before dinner yesterday. I could eat one of those now…

#ReallyWateredDownJuiceSeemsToBeANewThingThatIDesire

Water with a hint of something. Going to try elderflower cordial, though I probably should have asked for some ginger cordial instead…

#IDoNotLikeEatingLateButIThinkIAmGoingToHaveToOtherwiseIWillProbablyStartBeingSickInTheEvenings

Piece of toast before bed? Probably a good idea.

#WhyArePregnantPeoplePunishedByFeelingSickAllOfTheTime

Whoever/whatever invented pregnancy symptoms is a sod. Aren’t we punished enough with periods and menopause? Then we don’t get periods, which is nice, but then we have to deal with sickness. Sod. To those who don’t get morning sickness – you’re lucky!

#IAmNowSayingThatIAmSevenWeeksNowAsIDoThinkItIsMoreLikelyButIJustWantToBeFurtherAlongAlready

I just want to be clear of the first trimester already, and I want to get my jab. (I know I can get it already, but I do want to wait until 14 weeks like some countries suggest/are doing.)

#TiagosLaptopScreenThatBBrokeAMonthAgoSuddenlyStartedToWorkAgainSoThatIsGood

He came in showing me his laptop all excited. I was like ‘yeah the Google logo has always looked like that?’ Ahhh okay.

#ThisPostIsSupposedToBeAboutBTurningOneButItIsMostlyAboutMyMorningSicknessAndTiredness

Sorry love. I should have just made this post the poem and left my sickness until later in the week. I’m starting to feel a bit sick again now…

#InThePictureIHopeToImitatePhotosOfBThatITookToCelebrateHerBirthday

One hat. All in one outfit. Holding a video monitor. Looking quite serious.

(23rd August: I seemed to achieve it.)

#IGotHerAHatThatSays1OnItThoughTheySentMeOneThatSaid3OnItAtFirst

Well that will keep. Let’s see if I can find it in 2 years.

#TheOnlyThingThatWouldDistractHerWasHerBabyMonitor

We tried all the toys. T was getting frustrated. She liked the baby monitor and her room thermometer – things we don’t usually let her play with. I managed to move the thermometer out of the frame though.

#AndSheWoreAOnePieceSoIWillWearTheOneIHaveStartedToWearAgainAsIKnowIWillNotGetMuchUseOutOfItThisSummer

I suddenly remembered about it yesterday. I don’t remember wearing it last summer, and if things go to plan I doubt I will be fitting in it for much longer.

I’m going to eat some mini cheddars, then have a lie down…

7 weeks pregnant with B comparison:

A diptych of two full length images of me with my top pulled up to document my bump. In one I
I Have Nothing To Show Yet (7 weeks)
 
#ItIsColdNowSoIAmWearingExtraLayers
#IHaveNothingToShowYet
#OrMaybeIDoButIAmSureIHaveLookedTheSameAsThisEveryTimeIHaveEatenForManyYears
#IHaveLookedMorePregnantBeforeAfterOrderingAnIndianTakeawayAndNotBeingAbleToStop
#AtChristmas2018MyParentsThoughtIWasPregnantAsIWasWearingBaggyClothing
#AndIChooseComfortOverFashion
#YouKnowMe
#ThoughIWouldNotMindLookingALittleBetter
#IJustHateClothesShopping
#AndNowIsNotTheTimeToStartGettingIntoClothesMore
#BecauseTheyEitherWillNotFitMeForLongOrTheyWillNotFitMeAfter
#AGoodReasonForBaggierClothingThisWinterThoughIsToHideMyGrowingBoobs
#IToldAFriendThatIAmPregnantAndSheSaidSheThoughtMyBoobsLookedBiggerAndThisWasTwoWeeksAgo
#IHaveAlwaysHadAWeirdRelationshipWithThem
#BeingToldInHighSchoolThatIWasTwoParacetamolsOnAnIroningBoard
#AndBeingUpsetButAlsoNotCaringAsIWasLikeBoobsAreJustForBabiesAnyways
#AndTheIdeaOfMeWithBiggerBoobsWasJustWeird
#BeingToldByGuysThatTheyUsuallyDateGirlsWithBiggerBoobs
#Lol 
#ButIThinkBoobsBringAttentionAndIDoLikeToBeInvisible
#IReallyCanNotImagineMySelfHavingBigBoobs
#AndGoingOutWithThemOnDisplay
#NoOffenceToOtherPeopleWhoShowTheirsOff
#TheyLookGoodOnYouButTheyLookWeirdAsHellOnMe
#ThisPostHasTooManyBoobs
#NotSureIfIPreferBoobsOrBreasts
#BreastsJustSoundsLikeMeatRightNowAndThatIsMakingMeFeelSickEvenThoughIHadMeatCravingsYesterdayAndIAmVegetarian
#IThinkHowIFeelTowardsMyBodyDuringAndAfterMyPregnancyWillBeInteresting
#ParticularlyAsPregnantIsSeenAsBeautifulAndMyBodyGrowingIsForAGoodThingButThenAsSoonAsYouGiveBirthThereIsALotOfPressureToBeAsYouWereAgain
#IJustWantToLookAfterMyselfAndBodyAsBestAsICan 

B and baby X will be born in complete opposite seasons. In this diptych I am cold, but in my new photo I was quite hot.

I still look a mess all the time, so nothing has changed there. I feel like my boobs didn’t grow as quick this time, which I was kind of relieved about. They’re probably different from breastfeeding, but I can’t really tell.

I think my bump started to show a bit earlier this time, but it also may be just down to food. I seem to have a habit of doing shoots just after eating which doesn’t help.

I need to start eating better and exercising more again. I feel like over the last week I’ve let myself (and X) down a bit on that front. I’m trying my best…


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Categories
Pregnancy Waiting II

Mum Looks #1 (10 Weeks? / 11th June 2021)

Self-portrait of myself wearing a colourful top and shorts. I have a book tucked into the back of my shorts and a pig puppet hanging out of my pocket.
Mum Looks #1 (10 Weeks? / 11th June 2021)
 
#ThisIsHowICarriedAPuppetAndABookUpTheStairsTheOtherDayWhileHoldingB
#ThePuppetUsedToDistractHerDuringNappyChangesButNowALittleMusicalPianoWorksBetter
#TheBookIsTheVeryHungryCaterpillarWhichBLikesALot
#NotLongAgoIWasTalkingToAnotherMumAboutAnUpcomingBookFestivalWhereAuthorsWillReadTheirBooks
#IJokedThatAllOfBsFavouriteAuthorsAreDeadAsIThoughtThatEricCarleHadDiedALongTimeAgo
#IWasSurprisedAfterAQuickOnlineSearchThatHeWasStillAliveButThenHeDiedACoupleOfWeeksLater
#IWasSupposedToHaveMyFirstVaccineThisWeekButAfterALotOfResearchIDecidedToWaitUntilIAmInMySecondTrimester
#TheBabyDevelopsSoMuchInTheFirstTrimesterAndIAmFeelingSoSick
#TheyDoNotKnowTheLongTermEffectsOfTheVaccinationsOnUnbornBabiesSoIWouldRatherWaitABit
#IrelandSuggestsWaitingUntil14WeeksToGetTheVaccineAndIHaveSeenThatInAFewPlaces
#SoIJustNeedToBeCarefulAndTryNotToGetCovidBeforeThen
#InABabyClassTheOtherDayWeDidNotHaveToWearAMaskWhenWeWereSatDown
#AndInATakeawayAGuyWalkedInWithoutAMaskButIPlanToKeepWearingMineUntilIGetAVaccine
#IAmStartingToThinkThatMaybeIAmMoreSixWeeksPregnantThanTen
#IThinkIWouldHaveBeenFeelingThisSickForLongerIfIWasTenWeeks
#ButIWasAlsoSoConvincedThatIWasPregnantWhenIWouldHaveOnlyBeenTwoWeeksIfIAmOnlySixWeeksNow
#ItHasBeenGoodThatTiagoHadThisWeekOffAsItMeansIHaveHadPlentyOfTimeToRest
#WeHaveNotDoneMuchButThatIsFineAsIHaveBeenFeelingSoTiredAndSick
#BWokeUpAtSixFortyTodayRatherThanFiveFortyWhichWasABitOfARelief
#WeHaveSatInTheParkAlotAndTodayWePlanToGoToAWildlifeCentre
#IUpdatedHerBabyBookTheOtherDaySoItIsNearlyCompleteNow
#IFeelLikeTheSecondKidWillNotHaveSuchAGoodOneButINeedToMakeTheEffortToMakeSureTheyHaveSomething
#TheWombMustBeQuiteResilientToDealWithPregnantPeopleLookingAfterKids
#BIsAlwaysFallingOnMeOrUsingMyStomachAsASupportPost
#IHaveAlreadyHadMoreKnocksToMyStomachThanIDidDuringMyWholePregnancyWithHer
#LastTimeWhenIWasPregnantIGotALetterFromTheMidwivesAfterTwoDays
#LastNightIGotATextFromMyDoctorsSayingINeedToPickAReferralLetterUpFromReception
#IAmGuessingItIsToDoWithTheMidwivesButItSeemsWeirdThatTheyDoNotPostOrEmailIt
#WellIWentToPickUpMyLetterUpAndIHaveCalledTheHospital
#TheyHavePutMeDownAsSixWeeksForNowAndApparentlyTheyDoNotHaveABedForMeAtTheDueDateIfIAmTenWeeks

(20th August: This probably won’t become a mini-series, but maybe it should. I think my whole project is just Mum Looks – me looking dishevelled.)

#ThisIsHowICarriedAPuppetAndABookUpTheStairsTheOtherDayWhileHoldingB

I tried to take a photo of my look on my phone at the time, but it was hard.

#ThePuppetUsedToDistractHerDuringNappyChangesButNowALittleMusicalPianoWorksBetter

I think it plays about four tunes automatically and I seem to know which one is coming next now. (If I know which one is coming I should know how many it has, but I can’t be bothered to work it out.)

(20th August: It has four. Now I just use any tactic to get her to stay still. Earlier I was using her bath toy, but sometimes it’s a tub with the lid screwed on tight, or a book or anything.)

#TheBookIsTheVeryHungryCaterpillarWhichBLikesALot

I haven’t read it to her in a few days, which I am somewhat happy about as I need a break from it.

#NotLongAgoIWasTalkingToAnotherMumAboutAnUpcomingBookFestivalWhereAuthorsWillReadTheirBooks

I think a lot of children’s authors will be present.

#IJokedThatAllOfBsFavouriteAuthorsAreDeadAsIThoughtThatEricCarleHadDiedALongTimeAgo

She was a Mum at the park and we had a very brief conversation. She likes a lot of Pam Adams’ books and I just looked and she died in 2010…

#IWasSurprisedAfterAQuickOnlineSearchThatHeWasStillAliveButThenHeDiedACoupleOfWeeksLater

RIP Eric Carle. We like his From Head To Toe book too.

#IWasSupposedToHaveMyFirstVaccineThisWeekButAfterALotOfResearchIDecidedToWaitUntilIAmInMySecondTrimester

It was stressing me out, so now I am glad I decided to wait.

(20th August: I ended up getting the vaccine at 13 weeks after advice became a bit more consistent. I was also swayed by a talk by Pregnant Then Screwed and Viki Male, an immunologist. Here is the talk on Instagram.)

#TheBabyDevelopsSoMuchInTheFirstTrimesterAndIAmFeelingSoSick #TheyDoNotKnowTheLongTermEffectsOfTheVaccinationsOnUnbornBabiesSoIWouldRatherWaitABit

Research shows that babies are being born fine, but it is too early to know if there are long term effects and when is best to get the vaccine.

I’m feeling sick all of the time so I don’t want to get ill on top of it if I have a bad reaction…

#IrelandSuggestsWaitingUntil14WeeksToGetTheVaccineAndIHaveSeenThatInAFewPlaces

I saw on Twitter that a country (not sure which one) was offering the vaccine to women over 14 weeks. The UK and my doctor say all trimesters are fine, but I’d rather wait…

#SoIJustNeedToBeCarefulAndTryNotToGetCovidBeforeThen

I’ve managed it this far, but you never know.

#InABabyClassTheOtherDayWeDidNotHaveToWearAMaskWhenWeWereSatDown

I walked in and was like ‘why does everyone look different?’ After a while a couple more women walked in wearing them, but the teacher said we don’t have to wear them while sat down. I took mine off, though I wanted to keep it on. Next time I will as B runs off a lot so I need to get up and pick her up.

#AndInATakeawayAGuyWalkedInWithoutAMaskButIPlanToKeepWearingMineUntilIGetAVaccine

I shouldn’t let my awkwardness affect my personal safety. Maybe it’s unnecessary but I do not want to risk it.

I definitely will have a vaccine in my second trimester as getting Covid in the third trimester is quite dangerous for a pregnant person.

#IAmStartingToThinkThatMaybeIAmMoreSixWeeksPregnantThanTen

This ball of fun again.

#IThinkIWouldHaveBeenFeelingThisSickForLongerIfIWasTenWeeks

Looking at my Waiting project I was feeling sick at 6 weeks and by 8 weeks I felt really bad.

#ButIWasAlsoSoConvincedThatIWasPregnantWhenIWouldHaveOnlyBeenTwoWeeksIfIAmOnlySixWeeksNow

With B I had a period of two days, then it stopped so I thought it was weird, did a pregnancy test and I was about 4 weeks.

Earlier in the year when I was pregnant I had a period of sorts, then I was starting to wake up feeling sick and I was pregnant. About 6 weeks.

This time I had a normal period, then what seemed like a normal period, then a missed period. Then I did a test. I was feeling a bit sick before my missed period/or imagining things as I wanted to be pregnant. ?

#ItHasBeenGoodThatTiagoHadThisWeekOffAsItMeansIHaveHadPlentyOfTimeToRest

I am going to struggle when he goes back to work next week.

#WeHaveNotDoneMuchButThatIsFineAsIHaveBeenFeelingSoTiredAndSick

It’s been nice to just chill at home with T being available.

#BWokeUpAtSixFortyTodayRatherThanFiveFortyWhichWasABitOfARelief

Her heating comes on for a bit between 4 and 5, but it has been the last few days so who knows why she slept better today?

#WeHaveSatInTheParkAlotAndTodayWePlanToGoToAWildlifeCentre

Simple things. Hopefully she likes the centre today.

#IUpdatedHerBabyBookTheOtherDaySoItIsNearlyCompleteNow

Hurrah. I hadn’t looked at in a few months.

#IFeelLikeTheSecondKidWillNotHaveSuchAGoodOneButINeedToMakeTheEffortToMakeSureTheyHaveSomething

Or I need to change the way I do it. I’d feel bad if they didn’t have one.

#TheWombMustBeQuiteResilientToDealWithPregnantPeopleLookingAfterKids #BIsAlwaysFallingOnMeOrUsingMyStomachAsASupportPost #IHaveAlreadyHadMoreKnocksToMyStomachThanIDidDuringMyWholePregnancyWithHer

It freaks me out a bit when she touches my stomach, but I’m sure the baby is well protected.

#LastTimeWhenIWasPregnantIGotALetterFromTheMidwivesAfterTwoDays

Even though my Doctor said there was a massive delay with them.

#LastNightIGotATextFromMyDoctorsSayingINeedToPickAReferralLetterUpFromReception #IAmGuessingItIsToDoWithTheMidwivesButItSeemsWeirdThatTheyDoNotPostOrEmailIt

So it took longer to do the referral letter this time than it did for me to get a letter in the post this time? I know they’re busy. Maybe they thought it would be quicker for me to pick it up. It seems weird though. I’m going to go pick it up now.

#WellIWentToPickUpMyLetterUpAndIHaveCalledTheHospital

I guess they say to pick it up from reception now as the Doctors is operating more like in the ‘old days’ now. No having to wait outside for ages – the door was open.

I got myself a veggie samosa from a nearby shop on the way back and it was good.

#TheyHavePutMeDownAsSixWeeksForNowAndApparentlyTheyDoNotHaveABedForMeAtTheDueDateIfIAmTenWeeks

She said only I could say what date to put me down as. I said for 10 weeks. She said ‘well there are no beds left for then’. So I said to put me down as 6 weeks for now and we will have to see. If I wanted to be put down as 10 weeks a letter had to be sent to the higher ups or something, and maybe I am just 6 weeks. What a faff.

She said the first appointment will either be on the phone or in person. Last time they told me it would be on the phone, so things are changing.

(20th August: I was only 6 weeks here.)

6 weeks pregnant with B comparison:

Self-portrait of me sat with a purple scarf over myself. My left hand is just below my lips and I am gazing off and look deep in thought, though possibly just feeling sick.
Morning Sickness Is Not Only A Morning Thing (6 and a half weeks)
 
#SoTheSicknessComesAndGoes
#MorningSicknessIsSuchALie
#IAskedTheDoctorIfSheHadAnyTipsAfterIFirstWentWhenIFoundOut
#SheSaidThatMorningSicknessIsNotOnlyAMorningThing
#WellSheDidNotLie
#SometimesItIsTheMorning
#YesterdayICouldHaveBeenSickOverEverything
#LastWeekItWasMoreAnAfternoonThing
#ButSometimesItIsTheEvening
#SomeoneWasTalkingAboutWarmCamelsMilkTheOtherDay
#AndItWasMakingMeSoIll
#ThenILookedAtMyCollectionOfSoups
#AndJustReadingTheFlavoursMadeMeFeelIll
#ItIsSuchAWeirdThing
#IKnowThatNoOneReallyLikesToVomit
#ButIReallyHateIt
#IOnceProudlyCouldSayIHadNotVomitedInAtLeast10Years
#AndThenMyHousemateMadeMeSuperStrongRumCocktailsWhenIWasDoingMyBA
#AndThatWasGrim
#AndACharmingExBoyfriendTookPolaroidsOfMeByTheToilet 
#EvenThoughHeWasSickMostWeekendsBecauseOfAlcohol
#IDoNotKnowWhatHappenedToThosePolaroids
#BetTheyShowUpIn50Years
#Anyways
#YesterdayIHadStrongMeatAndFishCravingsEvenThoughIHaveBeenVegetarianForOverHalfMyLife
#CouldHaveEasilyEatenCodAndChipsOrATurkeyAndStuffingSandwich
#ThoughIThinkTheyWouldHaveMadeMeSick
#SoLastNightISettledForAVeganFishFreeBurger
#ItWasProbablyTheFirstTimeIHadEatenAFishBurger
#AndItWasAlrightButIWouldNotBeInARushToEatItAgain

Morning sickness is definitely a lie. With B I was generally sick in the mornings though struggled to eat anything at dinner except for pasta. This time I have been mostly sick in the evenings.

I didn’t like soup again this time and things like baked beans.

I haven’t had strong meat and fish cravings this time, though I’ve been taking double the amount of iron lately.

The bit about my ex-boyfriend taking pictures of me vomiting isn’t pleasant, but it’s true. Now I just take pictures of myself after vomiting…


Thanks for reading! If you’re enjoying my blog (and/or the work I make) please consider supporting me by ‘buying me a coffee’ on Ko-fi – thanks!

Categories
Pregnancy Waiting II

Imitating B Closing Her Eyes As She Knocks Down A Tower Of Blocks (10 Weeks? / 7th June 2021)

Self-portrait with my eyes closed. B's bricks are stacked up with 5 rows of 2 on top of each other with just one at the top. I am holding onto the top one with my left hand and pushing them.
Imitating B Closing Her Eyes As She Knocks Down A Tower Of Blocks (10 Weeks? / 7th June 2021)
 
#BHasBeenClosingHerEyesBeforeDoingLoudThingsForQuiteAWhile
#ItUsedToBeThatBeforeSheDroppedHerCupFromHerHighchairSheWouldCloseThem
#ILikeToSeeHowTallICanBuildATowerBeforeSheComesToKnockItOver
#TheBlocksBelongToTheWalkerThatSheHas
#SheIsGettingReallyGoodWithItAndSomeDaysSheWillJustKeepGoingUpAndDownTheRoomWithIt
#ThoughSheStillNeedsToLearnHowToTurnItRoundAsWeHaveToDoThatForHer
#SheIsAlsoGettingQuickerAtMovingAroundTheRoomWhileHoldingOntoFurniture
#IAmAlrightButJustFeelingQuiteSickForMostOfTheDay
#ITryToDrinkWaterRegularlyAndEatOftenButMaybeItIsMoreDownToTiredness
#BKeepsWakingUpAroundFiveFortyAtTheMomentWhichIsNotMuchFun
#IOftenWakeUpAtFiveByMyselfButWillThenFallBackToSleep
#TheOtherDayIReallyFanciedChipsWithCurrySauceWhichIHadAndItWasGreat
#ItMayHaveBeenACravingOrItMayJustHaveBeenANormalFoodFancy
#IfIWatchAnythingThatShowsFoodInItBeforeGoingToBedIGetSoHungry
#BSaysDuckALotNowWhichIsQuiteCute
#SometimesSheSeemsToSayYuckWhichIsFunny
#TalkingOfBirdsThoughHavingABlackbirdNestInTheGardenIsNotAsCoolAsIInitiallyThought
#AboutFourDaysAgoICouldHearLotsOfNoiseSoILookedOutTheWindowAfterAWhileAndIScaredAMagpieAwayFromTheNest
#IWasUpsetAndAssumedTheChicksWereAllDeadAndItPutMeInABadMood
#ISawTheParentsTheNextDayWithWhatLookedLikeFoodInTheirMouthButIThoughtThatMaybeTheyWereBuildingANewNest
#TheNextDayIWasNearbyAndIHeardCheepingThenSawABlackbirdFlyToTheNestAndIWasSoHappy
#ThenLaterThatDayIHeardMoreNoiseAndLookedOutOfTheWindowExpectingToSeeAMagpieButInsteadISawADeadChickOnTheFloor
#IDoNotKnowWhatHappenedButIHaveSeenNoActivityAroundTheNestSinceSoItMayHaveBeenTheLastChick
#NatureIsBeautifulNatureIsCruel
#TheDoctorCalledMeToAskMeQuestions
#HeHasPutDownMyLastPeriodAs6WeeksAgoButIReallyDoThinkIAmTenWeeks
#ThoughNowIAmStartingToDoubtMyselfAsWouldIHaveHadAPeriodSixWeeksAgoIfIWasPregnant
#IGuessItWillBeAWhileUntilIHaveAScanSoWeShallHaveToSee
#HeSaidItIsFineForMeToHaveAVaccinationAndNowIThinkUnderFortiesAreLimitedToWhichOnesTheyCanHaveAnyways
#HeWillReferMeToTheMidwifeServiceSoHopefullyIWillReceiveALetterFromThemSoon

#BHasBeenClosingHerEyesBeforeDoingLoudThingsForQuiteAWhile #ItUsedToBeThatBeforeSheDroppedHerCupFromHerHighchairSheWouldCloseThem

It makes me laugh, but I guess it is smart/sensible? Though it would be smarter if she covered her ears I guess…

#ILikeToSeeHowTallICanBuildATowerBeforeSheComesToKnockItOver

I will loudly count or say the colours out loud before she notices. It depends where we are as on some surfaces I can get it quite high, but it is a bit too dangerous so now I have to restrict it.

#TheBlocksBelongToTheWalkerThatSheHas #SheIsGettingReallyGoodWithItAndSomeDaysSheWillJustKeepGoingUpAndDownTheRoomWithIt #ThoughSheStillNeedsToLearnHowToTurnItRoundAsWeHaveToDoThatForHer

Some days we use it loads, some days we don’t. We should really be more consistent with it.

#SheIsAlsoGettingQuickerAtMovingAroundTheRoomWhileHoldingOntoFurniture

This morning she was going up and down the sofa pretty fast.

#IAmAlrightButJustFeelingQuiteSickForMostOfTheDay

I feel sick now. Fun times.

#ITryToDrinkWaterRegularlyAndEatOftenButMaybeItIsMoreDownToTiredness

I’m just at home most of the time so it means I can snack and drink well. I also eat breakfast earlier than I used to, which I am hoping might help but we’ll see. I am worried about going off my food like last time. Yesterday at dinner B was covered in food and it made me feel a bit sick.

#BKeepsWakingUpAroundFiveFortyAtTheMomentWhichIsNotMuchFun

The other day she had a two hour nap in the morning, yesterday she had forty minutes, so let’s see how well she naps today. I want to finish this then have a lie down…

#IOftenWakeUpAtFiveByMyselfButWillThenFallBackToSleep

This morning I could hear people outside at 5. I wasn’t sure if they drunk and still out, or maybe they were on their way to work.

#TheOtherDayIReallyFanciedChipsWithCurrySauceWhichIHadAndItWasGreat

Mmm.

#ItMayHaveBeenACravingOrItMayJustHaveBeenANormalFoodFancy

I fancy a lot of food at the moment. Hoping to get a falafel wrap today…

#IfIWatchAnythingThatShowsFoodInItBeforeGoingToBedIGetSoHungry

We’re been speed watching (1.25x if with Tiago or 1.5x by myself) some trashy stuff on Netflix, and if they eat I get realllllly hungry. I’m getting hungry now thinking about food and I had a good breakfast not long ago.

#BSaysDuckALotNowWhichIsQuiteCute

Duck duck duck duck duck.

#SometimesSheSeemsToSayYuckWhichIsFunny

I can’t wait until she says more.

#TalkingOfBirdsThoughHavingABlackbirdNestInTheGardenIsNotAsCoolAsIInitiallyThought

It’s been stressful/sad.

#AboutFourDaysAgoICouldHearLotsOfNoiseSoILookedOutTheWindowAfterAWhileAndIScaredAMagpieAwayFromTheNest #IWasUpsetAndAssumedTheChicksWereAllDeadAndItPutMeInABadMood

I had looked online to see if magpies will eat blackbird chicks and it said yeah. My Mum said there is less food for birds at the moment, so this also might be why.

#ISawTheParentsTheNextDayWithWhatLookedLikeFoodInTheirMouthButIThoughtThatMaybeTheyWereBuildingANewNest

Food or twigs? It looked like food.

#TheNextDayIWasNearbyAndIHeardCheepingThenSawABlackbirdFlyToTheNestAndIWasSoHappy

Sooo happy.

#ThenLaterThatDayIHeardMoreNoiseAndLookedOutOfTheWindowExpectingToSeeAMagpieButInsteadISawADeadChickOnTheFloor

🙁

#IDoNotKnowWhatHappenedButIHaveSeenNoActivityAroundTheNestSinceSoItMayHaveBeenTheLastChick

I felt bad. I was wishing that the blackbirds were able to communicate to me so that I would have been able to help them.

The pregnancy has been making me more emotional, so I really didn’t need a blackbird saga. The chick was a lot bigger than I thought it would be. I wonder if a magpie came, but then dropped it? I don’t know.

Luckily/sadly it was gone not long after, but I do not want to sit out there for a while.

#NatureIsBeautifulNatureIsCruel

I’ve really got into birds since living at my Nan’s house, but when I was pregnant I really liked to see the goslings, ducks and cygnets growing up by us in Liverpool.

#TheDoctorCalledMeToAskMeQuestions

I was worried that I would be waiting all day, but I had left some space at the bottom of my hashtags and I was starting to write my blog post.

#HeHasPutDownMyLastPeriodAs6WeeksAgoButIReallyDoThinkIAmTenWeeks

He said that I know my body better than him, but he has put 6 weeks anyways. I should have just given him the earlier date.

#ThoughNowIAmStartingToDoubtMyselfAsWouldIHaveHadAPeriodSixWeeksAgoIfIWasPregnant

The body is weird. Who knows. Maybe I am 6 weeks though.

(16th August: I was 6 weeks.)

#IGuessItWillBeAWhileUntilIHaveAScanSoWeShallHaveToSee

I am so impatient.

#HeSaidItIsFineForMeToHaveAVaccinationAndNowIThinkUnderFortiesAreLimitedToWhichOnesTheyCanHaveAnyways

‘If you’re under 40, you’ll only be shown appointments for the Pfizer/BioNTech or Moderna vaccines. If you’re 40 or over, you’ll be asked if you’re pregnant to make sure you’re only shown appointments for these vaccines.’

#HeWillReferMeToTheMidwifeServiceSoHopefullyIWillReceiveALetterFromThemSoon

I just read the hashtags from my pregnancy project that was not to be and it said he said to not expect to hear from them anytime soon, but I got a letter two days later. This time he didn’t say expect a wait, so we’ll see. Knowing my luck it will take 2 weeks.

6 weeks pregnant with B comparison:

The new picture doesn’t really show me pregnant as this project is a mix of pregnancy, and motherhood photos.

I'm lying on the living room floor in a dark pink top with my hair flowing down. My legs are bare and lifted off the ground with one foot supporting the other.
I Can Tell My Body Is Already Changing (6 weeks)

#WellWeHadBeenTryingToGetPregnantSinceTheStartOfTheYear
#WeHaveAWeddingToGoToInPortugalInJulyNextYearSoIThoughtWeShouldPauseThingsForABit
#ButTiagoSaidWeWereBetterOffTrying
#AndToBeFairIThoughtICouldNotGetPregnant
#EvenThoughIHadABloodTestAtOvulationOnceAndTheySaidAllWasGood
#SoIDecidedIWantedToBeLessStressedOutInLifeSoIStartedToMakeAnEffortToBeMoreRelaxed
#WhenMyPeriodWas4DaysLateIKnowSomethingWasUp
#SoIBoughtATest
#AndIForgotIWasGoingToDoOneSoIHadToKeepDrinkingWaterAndEventuallyIManagedToGetAResultFromTheDamnThing
#AndTheCrossCameUpPrettyQuickThen
#AndIWasNotThatSurprised
#IDidNotHaveMuchOfAReaction
#IWasJustRelievedToKnowICouldGetPregnant
#AndThenIJustGotRealStressedAboutWhatIfThingsGoWrong
#IDoNotKnowHowPeopleDealtWithPregnanciesPreInternet
#AnythingAndIAmCheckingIsThisNormal
#AnywaysICanTellMyBodyIsAlreadyChanging
#AndIHaveBeenFeelingSick
#MorningSicknessIsALieItStrikesAtAnytime
#ButItIsEarlyDaysForMeSoItIsNotYetThatBad
#IKnowINeedToEatMoreCalciumSoIAmIndulgingInCheddarOnSandwiches
#WasTryingToCutOutSugarButWasEatingChutneyAndPickleSoAmHavingMoreMarmiteThanThoseNow
#AndIAmGoingOffFoods
#LikeDaalOrDalOrDahlWhichWeEatAllTheTimeUsually
#AndMyFavouriteLunchOfASpicyBeanBurgerWithGherkinsTomatoesAndHoumousIsNotAsGreatAsItUsedToBe
#AndIHaveEatenThatWeeklyForYears
#AndIMeanYEARS
#AndICanNotDrinkMostOfMyLargeCollectionOfHerbalTeas
#AsEverythingHasLicoriceInIt
#SoItIsRooibosAndHoneybushEverydayForNowUntilIFindOtherOnes

I haven’t got back into drinking herbal tea since being pregnant with B, but I also drank more when I was in an office setting and I haven’t been in one of those since before England’s first lockdown.

We ended up having two weddings to go to, but one got postponed and one got cancelled (they’ve got married). I’m still stressed that things could go wrong, but B is a big distraction this time. She also makes time go by fast, though the days are long.

I have been noticing my body changes and of course I couldn’t help but notice the sick feelings, but it is different this time with having B around.


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