(These shoots have been really stressing me out. I doubt I’ll get to 42 weeks, so I hope this is the last time I have to do one. I’m definitely disappointed that they don’t line up better – I wish I’d known that I’d repeat this shot, or thought about it more and made my life easier by standing or something.)
Fingers crossed. Probably not as when the baby is actually coming I need to get organised – finish packing the last bits of my hospital bag (things that I use every day like phone charger and toiletries), get B’s stuff organised etc.
I’m not entirely convinced that this baby isn’t breech, or will not be by the time I give birth though. I do think I might be at home longer though. Having B complicates things as my Mum needs to come and get her, if she isn’t here already etc.
It’s from having B and always being out and about our local area. Some I know as they talk to other dog owners and so I have got to know them that way. It’s really nice going for a walk and sometimes having a chat with three people. B isn’t so impressed though…
I’ve mentioned it before. It was easier to give it to her in her water when she was younger, and it encourages her to drink so it’s fine. I really don’t like the taste of it, but she only has plain water or milk otherwise, so it’s probably exciting to her.
I asked if I could have a hug and she ignored me. Then I opened up my cardigan and she ran to me. Tiago came in the room and I held it out wide to hide her from view, so she had a laugh while Tiago pretended that he couldn’t see her and looked for her.
I only knew a couple of his songs until 6ish months ago, but then suddenly really got into a lot more of his music. He’s been the soundtrack to a lot of B’s meals, and weirdly yesterday I suddenly had an urge to listen to his music after having a bit of a break. Thanks for the music Meat Loaf.
He had given her milk and pointed to a glass and said ‘this is what is left of B’s vitamin water’ (we mix her vitamins in with her water as it seems easier than giving it on a spoon, though she likes it so she probably would take it from the spoon now). I was confused and said ‘it looks a bit clear’, but he mentioned about her paracetamol sometimes being clear and sometimes being pink. Her vitamins are a very strong pink.
After a few seconds it clicked and I could not stop laughing. I tried the water to make T feel a bit better. It couldn’t have been so bad as B had drank most of the cup.
When I lived in London I’d never sit in the priority chairs so it felt weird, apart from getting the train to and from Brum. I love the single seats that face out, and I managed to get one of them both ways, so I didn’t have to sit next to someone without a mask.
I was disappointed how many people weren’t wearing masks on public transport in London.
Especially those who have an older kid as they will hopefully feel more comfortable going out. I’m not being picky though, I’d just like more weekday friends.
19 weeks pregnant with B comparison:
I had forgot about describing kicks as popcorn popping. It just felt more ticklish this time and then quickly moved onto stronger movements.
My dreams have been intense lately (mid-October), but I don’t like when I have them as they tire me out.
I had a phase of being quite into vinegary crisps this time, but it passed. I have been enjoying beetroot and pickled red cabbage lately though (in a wrap with other things), and I did have a lot of vinegar on my chips at dinner today. But I was a fan of vinegar before being pregnant – I just usually don’t choose salt and vinegar crisps over other flavours though. Exciting stuff.
I have been making banana bread a lot lately and I put a lot of yoghurt on that, so I guess that’s my calcium sorted.
I did not want the suitcases hanging around for ages, so I washed what needed to be washed and put most of it away. Tiago just needs to sort out his mountain of clothes. The floor is covered in B’s toys, but there is no point tidying as she will be messing with them again in a bit. It’s good to see Nan too – though B was a bit weird with her for a day as I think she could not really remember her?
T’s parents live so close to the airport that it’s great. We can leave fairly late and still have plenty of time. We ate our lunch in the airport while giving B some snacks as she hadn’t eaten much since it was quite early for her. The flight was about 35 minutes I think.
It was less than 2 hours until the flight and T went to ask if it had started. They said yes, then updated the board. We were going to wait until the queue had got smaller, but we also didn’t want to miss our flight.
We moved to a different queue (after following others who had been in our queue), but it turned out to be for a different flight so they made us wait.
They’d used a company for tests to fly out with and it’d been fine. The staff told them they did not accept results from that company anymore… I felt so bad for them. It was late in the day and there is only one direct flight to London a week from the Azores (which was the flight we were all queuing for). I hope they got home okay in the end.
Some people had not needed to check-in, so some people got to the boarding gates without showing test results and were not allowed to board as they had not done tests. There were a lot of empty seats by us on the plane and we had 3 seats to ourselves which was good.
It was not as bad as it could have been, but we should have probably got off at the first stop and got a taxi from there as it cost the same as from the fifth stop but whatever. It was too late by the time we realised as our luggage had been put in sections and we were at the back of the coach.
Her cousin was loving it, but B was crying her head off and we were getting stressed. My sister suggested going out to get her something (as the restaurant didn’t have much toddler friendly food). The kids loved the spinch and feta parcels I got.
The first night we all woke up at 7:45 after I realised what time it was and got us up. Yesterday I kept pressing snooze but we got up around 7:30. Today I heard B at 6:15, but she fell asleep again and then was crying at 6:45 so we got up then.
I was sick at about 7. Fun times. Need to get her up now…
19 weeks pregnant with B comparison:
This time I didn’t need a prescription, and asked for a maternity exemption certificate later (23 weeks?). No one really tells you how this stuff works or generally asks you if you want things, so you just have to find out for yourself or hope that someone tells you stuff. I get it though – the NHS are under resourced, underfunded, overworked etc etc.
With a subsequent pregnancy you have less appointments so you just have to get on with it and pay attention to your body more I guess. I can feel the baby kicking (or braxton kicks?) as I write this. It definitely helps when you start to feel things as you can monitor things for yourself a bit better.
Tiago celebrated his 2 years of citizenship the other day (I’m writing this mid-October). We applied for B’s citizenship on holiday and I think it has gone through as now we can apply for a citizenship card for her. Hurrah.
I’m still pissed off about Brexit and will forever be, but we are lucky as hopefully one day our little family will all be EU citizens. With the kids it is easy, but with me it is more of a faff.
I am still grateful that we didn’t get stuck in zone 5 of London. We might have tried for kids sooner though…
When I wrote the hashtags I had no idea we would end up living in Birmingham within a year. Weird.
Last night she went to bed at 8pm after having dinner at 6.30pm and she woke up when we woke her up at 7am, so that was good. The other nights she had been going to bed 2/3 hours past her bedtime, so it’s good to know she can do it without staying up late late. We’ll have to see if this routine works in the UK.
Yeah I’m talking about discharge, and though I talked about it in Waiting… I’m like maybe people don’t want to read about it again? It is something that I had not heard about before being pregnant though.
Another fun pregnancy symptom. Every night Tiago is like ‘I need to get up early in the morning’, but will then give me time to stretch while he makes B breakfast as I really can not stomach feeding her at the moment.
Mentally it felt like a win, but physically it felt the same. (Her waking up after 6.)
I only watched the last fifteen minutes of extra time as I felt too stressed to watch it. It doesn’t feel like a proud win and I’m quite disgusted by the behaviour of English fans. Add my Covid worries to it and I’m annoyed as hell.
I mentioned reading a book by Stephen Fry in my last post, but I’ve moved on to How To Solve A Murder by Derek and Pauline Tremain. It’s not really what I thought it would be after months of delaying reading it, but it’s an easy read.
I was worried we had hurried into booking stuff and was worried about the cost of changing our flight. Luckily I decided to not go for the cheapest option via not buying through the actual airline, and it turns out we have flexible tickets. Great. So if all goes to plan we will make our connecting flight that evening.
Swimming. I just want to swim. I never swam when I was pregnant with B, and I want to experience it this time as if things go well then I think two children are enough.
10 weeks pregnant with B comparison:
14th September: Well, I can completely relate to these previous hashtags. I’m nearly double in pregnant now, but I still can not get my head around it. It is odd thinking that next year we could be a family of 4. It’s weird thinking of myself as a mother of 2, it’s weird thinking of B as a big sister, it’s bizarre.
I wish I could nap as often as I could then, but I did have a nap yesterday afternoon – I was really disorientated, and I woke B up 40 minutes later than I should have. Whoops.
Tiago talks to my bump when he remembers, but it’s different this time around with B as she is a big distraction. The pregnancy seems to be going faster.
And the image with its original Ulterior Monologue hashtags – it shows it in a very different light.
Ulterior Monologue is the project that I first started to use hashtags with. It was my response to my awkwardness of using hashtags and wanting to use more text with my images, but also feeling awkward about that.
The project was about wanting to be pregnant but not feeling able to talk about it. It started to come to a natural end when I found out I was pregnant, though there was some crossover with my new pregnancy project. I didn’t announce my pregnancy on social media until I was 20 weeks due to feeling worried that something bad would happen and not wanting to ‘curse myself’. It also took me a while to figure out what I was doing project wise and how to go about posting without revealing I was pregnant; in the end I went for the ‘post all the projects I’ve ever done’ archive approach on my Instagram.
I had forgotten about how I felt during this photo, but having never been pregnant before every little pain made me nervous. Pregnancy is thought of as a beautiful time, which it is, but I found it very stressful – even before the pandemic.
I never went to get the cramps checked out. It could have been wind (I think I had forgotten the scenario so I never had to share hashtags about trapped wind, but after having a baby you talk about bodily functions A LOT) or it could have just been my uterus stretching (makes sense as I was growing a baby inside it) or something else.
It is said that a photo says a 1000 words, but I don’t think a picture can tell you everything or even that much sometimes. Maybe a picture just makes you think what you want to think based on your life experiences and personality. Show a picture to 100 people and I wonder what they would all say and how differing the opinions would be about what the image is really about. Obviously it depends on what the image is of – show a picture of a cat and I’m sure there would be a mixed crowd of ‘that’s cute’ and ‘I hate cats’.
These two sets of hashtags really show two different sides to the image and if you only see one set then you miss part of the story. How would you know that I was pregnant and stressing out about cramps just by looking at a picture of me in a hat? It’s true I don’t look happy, but I’m not about to open the can of worms that is ‘why don’t people smile in photos these days?’ Does it really matter though about only knowing part of the story? I’d forgotten half of it myself.
Anyways, I think using hashtags with my work really brings another level to the pictures, though whether people choose to read them or not is their choice.
I love text with photographs and back when I used to go to exhibitions (used to because of Covid) I’d often spend more time reading the accompanying image text rather than looking at an image. I wonder if this will change when I finally go to a show again – will I want to hang around? Will I be able to with a baby anyways? Will I feel comfortable using a public toilet and changing her in one? How will I feel about breastfeeding in public or will I just choose to express and bottle-feed her?