Categories
Pregnancy Waiting II

Apparently My Children Like To Be Breech At 37 Weeks (37 Weeks / 12th January 2022)

Self-portrait from my thighs to below my shoulders. I am wearing a black bra and black leggings. I am side on and pulling up the left side of the leggings with my right hand. My fist is over my bump and my bump is exposed.
Apparently My Children Like To Be Breech At 37 Weeks (37 Weeks / 12th January 2022)
 
#IDoNotKnowWhatPhotoWillAccompanyTheseHashtagsButMaybeSomethingPlayfulAsIMayNotHaveABumpForMuchLonger
#IWentToMyDelayed36WeekAppointmentAndTheFirstThingTheMidwifeSaidWasICheckedYourNotesAndSawThatYouHadABreechDeliveryWithYourFirst
#ISaidYesAndJokedAboutHowBabyXWasBackToBackAtMyLastAppointmentAndHowIHaveAwkwardChildren
#ThereWasAStudentMidwifeAgainAndTheyBothCheckedMyBloodPressureAsThereWasSomeProteinInMyUrineButTheyWereNotConcerned
#IHadToBreatheIntoACarbonMonoxideMachineAndMyResultsWereFine
#ThenTheyHadAFeelOfMyBumpAndTheMidwifeSaidThatTheBabySeemsToBeBreech
#IJustLaughedAndThenIStartedToDaydreamAboutAllThePossibleScenarios
#IThoughtTheBabyHadMovedAsItsBeenSuperActiveButIWasHopingItHadTurnedRoundFromBackToBack
#TheyBothMeasuredMyBumpAndGotACentimetreDifference
#TheBabyDoesNotSeemToHaveGrownMuchSinceMyLastAppointmentSoIWillGoForAScanWhichWillAlsoConfirmIfTheBabyIsBreech
#TheyBookedMeInForTheNextAvailableSlotWhichIsTypicallyOnTheDayThatTiagoHasToGoOutForWorkSoHopefullyHeWillBeHomeInTime
#HeWillDriveMeThereAndWatchBInTheCarAsICanNotTakeHerInWithMe
#IJustWantToHaveTheScanDoneAlreadyAndKnowWhatIsGoingOn
#IWasStartingToFeelRelaxedAboutTheBirthAgainButNowIFeelQuiteStressedOut
#IJustNeedToRelaxAndSeeWhatMyOptionsAre
#IWentThroughAllTheEmotionsOnMyWayHomeIncludingAnnoyedWhichIFeltBadFor
#IHaveBeenGaggingAfterBrushingMyTeethAgainLatelyWhichIsQuiteUnpleasant
#InBNewsIGotSomeUpdatesOnHerNurseryAppTodayWhichWereQuiteOldButSuddenlyCameThrough
#TheyTalkAboutTheThingsThatSheGetsUpToAndTheWordsSheSaysWhichAnswersMyPreviousQuestions
#ApparentlyDuringOneSessionSheWasSayingQuackQuackWhichSheHasNeverSaidToMeEvenWithAllMyEncouragement
#SheAlsoSaidStompRoarAndMunchMunchWhenPlayingWithDinosaurs
#IThenAskedHerWhatSoundADinosaurMakesAndSheSaidSomethingSimilarToRoar
#AndDuringAMusicSessionAtNurserySheSaidBaaBaaSheepWhichSurprisedMe
#IGuessAtNurserySheCopiesTheOtherKidsAndAdultsMoreAndIsMoreLikelyToSayThings
#ISingWindTheBobbinUpToHerLoadsAndSometimesSheWillDoAFewActionsWithMeAndSometimesSheDoesNone
#WeWerePlayingWithHerCowPuppetAndSheSuddenlySaidMoo
#ItIsJustFunnyAsTheOtherDayIWasSayingToAFriendThatIWishedThatBMadeAnimalNoisesAndApparentlySheDoes
#IHaveStartedToPlayHideAndSeekWithBWhereICountToFiveAndTryToFindHer
#NineOutOfTenTimesSheIsBehindTheKitchenDoorButIPretendICanNotFindHerForABit
#SheIsStillTeethingAndHasABitOfAColdButSheIsRunningAroundWithMoreEnergyTheseDays

#IDoNotKnowWhatPhotoWillAccompanyTheseHashtagsButMaybeSomethingPlayfulAsIMayNotHaveABumpForMuchLonger

I feel like I should experiment and try to do something a bit different, but I’m quite tired so we’ll have to see.

#IWentToMyDelayed36WeekAppointmentAndTheFirstThingTheMidwifeSaidWasICheckedYourNotesAndSawThatYouHadABreechDeliveryWithYourFirst

Correct. She was born less than a week from this point…

#ISaidYesAndJokedAboutHowBabyXWasBackToBackAtMyLastAppointmentAndHowIHaveAwkwardChildren

She said about sitting forward and not slouching to encourage the baby to turn round etc. I was slouching at the time.

#ThereWasAStudentMidwifeAgainAndTheyBothCheckedMyBloodPressureAsThereWasSomeProteinInMyUrineButTheyWereNotConcerned

The student midwife did it first, but the midwife just wanted to make sure it was correct as protein in your urine can be a sign of pre-eclampsia.

#IHadToBreatheIntoACarbonMonoxideMachineAndMyResultsWereFine

I couldn’t remember doing it before, but she said they always check at the start and towards the end of your pregnancy.

#ThenTheyHadAFeelOfMyBumpAndTheMidwifeSaidThatTheBabySeemsToBeBreech #IJustLaughedAndThenIStartedToDaydreamAboutAllThePossibleScenarios

My brain just stayed stuck on a breech baby for the rest of the appointment and I forgot to ask about hospital restrictions etc.

B wasn’t breech at her 36 week appointment, so I’m wondering if this appointment hadn’t been delayed would Baby X have been breech at the original appointment time? I’m thinking that they might not have been. I guess at least this time I am aware that the baby is breech at this point (though B was born at 37+5, and I believe she became breech the day before she was born).

#IThoughtTheBabyHadMovedAsItsBeenSuperActiveButIWasHopingItHadTurnedRoundFromBackToBack

She commented while she was checking the heartbeat about how active the baby is.

#TheyBothMeasuredMyBumpAndGotACentimetreDifference

I think last time the midwife and the student midwife got about a difference of about 4cm.

#TheBabyDoesNotSeemToHaveGrownMuchSinceMyLastAppointmentSoIWillGoForAScanWhichWillAlsoConfirmIfTheBabyIsBreech

She said not to be worried about the growth as it might just be down to having different midwives at every appointment, and everyone measures differently. With B I had the same midwife measuring me, except for one appointment when she thought someone else should see me in case she wasn’t able to be at B’s birth – spoiler: neither of them were at B’s birth.

#TheyBookedMeInForTheNextAvailableSlotWhichIsTypicallyOnTheDayThatTiagoHasToGoOutForWorkSoHopefullyHeWillBeHomeInTime

He rarely has to go out for work, but there we go.

#HeWillDriveMeThereAndWatchBInTheCarAsICanNotTakeHerInWithMe

If I could I would just get a taxi to the appointment if Tiago doesn’t get back in time, but that would be too easy. My Mum will have to come and take care of B if he is going to be late.

#IJustWantToHaveTheScanDoneAlreadyAndKnowWhatIsGoingOn #IWasStartingToFeelRelaxedAboutTheBirthAgainButNowIFeelQuiteStressedOut

I’ve gone from feeling stressed to relaxed and back again a lot lately. It’s too much. Now I’ve had a bit of time to process things I feel a bit more relaxed.

#IJustNeedToRelaxAndSeeWhatMyOptionsAre

I’m just worried if they turn the baby that it might turn back again, but it is what it is. I just want to try a water birth this time. I don’t feel like I can go through arguing my way out of a c-section again, but who knows how things will be on the day of the birth.

#IWentThroughAllTheEmotionsOnMyWayHomeIncludingAnnoyedWhichIFeltBadFor

It’s not the baby’s fault. I just felt irritated. I was sweating as I was leaving the appointment.

#IHaveBeenGaggingAfterBrushingMyTeethAgainLatelyWhichIsQuiteUnpleasant

I do not like it. Who does though?

#InBNewsIGotSomeUpdatesOnHerNurseryAppTodayWhichWereQuiteOldButSuddenlyCameThrough

Ooh.

#TheyTalkAboutTheThingsThatSheGetsUpToAndTheWordsSheSaysWhichAnswersMyPreviousQuestions

One of her carers said that she was saying two word sentences and I was confused. What words? etc.

#ApparentlyDuringOneSessionSheWasSayingQuackQuackWhichSheHasNeverSaidToMeEvenWithAllMyEncouragement

Quacking is probably the animal sound that I make to her the most, so it’s good that it’s paying off I guess.

#SheAlsoSaidStompRoarAndMunchMunchWhenPlayingWithDinosaurs

It might explain why she suddenly stomps along with the elephant in her ‘From Head To Toe’ book. She has a book about dinosaurs where I always roar on the first page, so again I guess it’s paid off.

#IThenAskedHerWhatSoundADinosaurMakesAndSheSaidSomethingSimilarToRoar

Maybe rar. I can’t remember now, but it sounded like a roar anyways.

#AndDuringAMusicSessionAtNurserySheSaidBaaBaaSheepWhichSurprisedMe

She had a phase of liking me singing that song, which might have been after that session which also explains why she was so keen on the song – perhaps?

#IGuessAtNurserySheCopiesTheOtherKidsAndAdultsMoreAndIsMoreLikelyToSayThings

There’s more encouragement. The notes say about her looking to her peers and wanting them to join in with her etc. An example is she went to play with some animal hand puppets then smiled to her peers to join her. She put her hand in the puppets, which also explains why she started to do that at home not long ago. Nursery is obviously doing her a lot of good!

#ISingWindTheBobbinUpToHerLoadsAndSometimesSheWillDoAFewActionsWithMeAndSometimesSheDoesNone

It’s very hit and miss. Same with the ‘From Head To Toe’ book as sometimes she will do the actions, and sometimes she won’t. I guess it depends on her mood, and she isn’t on the planet to perform for me.

#WeWerePlayingWithHerCowPuppetAndSheSuddenlySaidMoo

All the surprises!

#ItIsJustFunnyAsTheOtherDayIWasSayingToAFriendThatIWishedThatBMadeAnimalNoisesAndApparentlySheDoes

It was a day of discovery.

#IHaveStartedToPlayHideAndSeekWithBWhereICountToFiveAndTryToFindHer #NineOutOfTenTimesSheIsBehindTheKitchenDoorButIPretendICanNotFindHerForABit

Sometimes she runs around after me while I look for her, and then goes back behind the kitchen door.

#SheIsStillTeethingAndHasABitOfAColdButSheIsRunningAroundWithMoreEnergyTheseDays

It’s good. I get worried about her, but she is usually in a good mood despite everything.

37 weeks comparison with B:

Self-portrait showing me leaning forward with my hands on my hips and my bump drooping down. White boxes censor my nipples.
Tiago Says This Shows The Animal Side Of Carrying A Baby (37 weeks)
 
#HadAMidwifeAppointmentYesterday
#MyUsualOneWasOnAnnualLeaveButAlsoTimedItToMakeSureISawSomeoneDifferent
#SheWasReallyNiceAndJustWentThroughAllMyNotesToDoubleCheckThatEverythingWasCorrect
#SheCalledForMyBloodResultsAndSaidSheDidNotKnowWhatIHaveBeenEatingButMyHemoglobinLevelIsGreat
#WhichIsGoodAsIAmVegetarianButIHaveBeenTakingIronForYears
#AndBeingPregnantEveryoneIsAlwaysAskingYouWhatYouAreEatingAndIfYouAreEatingWellEtc
#IHaveProbablyBeenABitHealthierBecauseOfThePandemic
#NotJustBeingAbleToGoOutAndGetWhatIWantAndOurFavouriteTakeawaysAreOnlyJustReopening
#ChocolateMilkHasBeenMyMainTreat
#SheSaidEverythingElseLooksGoodAndThatFrom37WeeksYouCanHaveAHomeBirth
#ThoughIfIHadTheBabyNowWeWouldProbablyHaveToGoToHospitalForACheckOver
#ICanAlsoStartUsingMyMedicalAidThatWillHopefullyHelpReduceTheRiskOfTearingAndAnEpisiotomy
#AndAlsoStartTryingToCollectColostrumIfMyBoobsSoWishToDoIt
#ThoseTwoThingsCouldPotentiallyTriggerEarlyLabour
#SoThoughIFeelRelaxedAndKindOfExcitedAboutBirthNowBecauseItIsSafeForMeToGiveBirthAtHomeNow
#IDoNotWantToHaveToGoToHospitalAsTheRulesForVisitationAreVeryStrictBecauseOfCovid
#IfIHaveToThenIHaveToAndIKnowWeWillWeWellLookedAfter
#ThereIsNoPointGettingStressedOutAboutThings
#IFeelLikePeopleDoNotKnowHowToTalkToPregnantPeople
#IncludingMyselfBeforeIWasPregnant
#PeopleAskingMeHowIAmFeelingAboutBirthWhichIsFineButThenAskingIfIAmWorried
#WhyShouldIBeWorried
#WhatIsThePointOfWorryingWhenItIsAPerfectlyNormalThingToHappenToMyBody
#PeopleTellingMeAboutALongLabourSomeoneTheyKnowHadAndHavingToHaveEmergencyCaesareans
#ApparentlyEmergencyOnesAreActuallyQuiteRareAndAreCalledUnplanned
#AndIfYouAreInLabourFor48HoursItIsNotConstantItJustComesAndGoes
#AtLeastThatIsWhatIHaveHeardButWhatDoIKnowAsIAmYetToExperienceIt
#IThinkTheMorePositiveYouAreAboutItThenTheBetterItWillGo
#AsAdrenalineStopsLabourSoIJustWantToFocusOnProducingAllTheOxytocin
#IAmDefinitelyGladThatIHaveDoneSomeReadingAndOnlineCourses

I think the day before I had still been 36 weeks.

Chocolate oat milk has been a big treat of mine this pregnancy too. I haven’t been as healthy this time with food this time I think, since I live with my Nan who has a massive sweet tooth and I have been indulging in crisps a bit lately.

I was not planning on using my medical aid this time as I was worried that that is what made B turn round, but now I might give it a go as I have nothing to lose. I also need to look at my colostrum kit, but I don’t know if I can really produce any yet.

Spoiler alert – I had to go to hospital with B.

I was obviously in a good place mentally in regards to giving birth. I need to get there again, so I need to binge on as much hypnobirthing stuff as I can…

Self-portrait showing that I can only do the top part of my coat up.
My Coat Is Uncomfortably Tight These Days (37 weeks)
 
#JustRealisedThatThePrevious3ImagesInTheSeriesAreQuiteNude
#IHadAlreadyPlannedForThisShootToBeMeInMyCoat
#ItWasNotADecisionOfOhIBetterCoverUpInTheNextPicture
#ThoughIAmNotSureWhyIFeelTheNeedToStateThis
#AnywaysYesterdayWeWereOnAWalk
#ItWasABitWindySoIWoreMyCoat
#ICouldJustAboutDoItUpButItFeltTooTightSoIHadToUndoIt
#ButItWasSoWindyThatINeededToDoItUpABit
#LuckilyICouldStillDoTheTopTwoPoppersUp
#IProbablyLookedABitFunnyWithMyBumpHangingOutTheBottomOfMyCoat
#ThoughNotManyPeopleWereAboutAnyways
#AndIDidNotReallyCare
#TodayWeHaveBeenOrganisingTheBedroomMore
#IThoughtTheCotWouldJustGoWhereWeWantedIt
#ButNoThatWouldBeTooEasy
#SoWeHadToRearrangeThingsOtherwiseItWouldBeAFaffToGetInAndOutOfTheRoom
#IDecidedToSetTheCotUp
#ItFeelsABitPrematureAndLikePerhapsIAmJinxingThings
#ButItWillBeNiceToLoseTheShockOfSeeingACotEverytimeIWalkInTheRoom
#ThoughIGuessWalkingInAndSeeingABabyWillBeMoreOfAShock
#WeAlsoCutDownTheBoxesThatOurPillowsCameInToMakeUnderBedStorage
#IWasLookingAtBuyingSomeUnderBedStorageTheOtherWeek
#ButTheDimensionsWereNeverRight
#ItTookMeHalfAnHourToCutOneDownToSize
#ThenTiagoCameHomeFromTheSupermarketAndDidTheOtherOneInAMinuteWithAKnife
#OhWellIWasWatchingSomeFreeBabyClassWhilstIDidTheFirstOneAndItHelpedMeConcentrate
#TiagoIsPracticingPuttingTheCarSeatInTheCarAtTheMoment
#ThoughIDoNotKnowWhenWeWillUseItExceptIfWeHaveToGoToHospitalForSomeReason
#ICanNotRememberTheLastTimeIHadANapDuringTheDay
#IAlwaysPlanToButMyToDoListSeemsNeverEnding

I can still do up the inner zip of this coat, so though this baby may be bigger than B was, my bump is obviously not bigger in some ways. Not sure.

I feel like I need to nest, but B has so much stuff that it is hard to. We can not set up the cot yet as it is at my parent’s house for in case they have to have B. I think I will keep B in her cot, and use their one for the new baby.

I try to have a nap every day when B does as otherwise I regret it. I often do not feel sleepy, but manage to sleep for a bit.

Self-portrait with my husband, Tiago, where we recreated an image for the second time (so there are 3 similar images). Tiago is at the same level as my bump and is slightly staring past it.
Bump Is Definitely Droopier (37 weeks)
 
#IDecidedYesterdayThatWeShouldRemakeThisPicture
#IWasNotSureIfIShouldLeaveItABitLonger
#ButObviouslyIDoNotKnowWhenIMayGiveBirth
#IThoughtMaybeThereWouldNotBeThatMuchChangeSince33Weeks
#ButBumpIsDefinitelyDroopier
#ShameThatWeDidNotDoItAround27AndAHalfWeeksToo
#ItCouldHaveBeenAPictureThatWeRemadeOnceAMonthIfWeHadThoughtAboutIt
#TiagoLooksALittleDifferentButNotMuch
#HeHasTrimmedHisBeardBetweenTheLastRemakeAndThisOne
#IStillNeedToTryToGiveHimAHaircutThoughIAmNervousTo
#HeHadHisBirthdayThisWeek
#ToCelebrateWeOrderedIndianTakeawayThatLastedFor3MealsEach
#ThereWasASmallChanceThatHeCouldHaveSharedHisBirthdayWithBaby
#ButIAmGladThatTheBabyHasNotArrivedYet
#IJustAskedHimHowHeFeelsAboutItPotentiallyBeingHisLastBirthdayWithoutBeingAFather
#HeSaysHeDoesNotCareMuchAboutHisBirthday
#HeLooksForwardToHavingAnotherHumanAroundAndBeingAFather
#WatchingThemGrowAndBeingResponsibleForTheirEducation
#IThinkHeIsExcitedToRelaxWithTheBabyOnHisChest
#LastNightIWasAwakeBetween3And6
#TiagoStirredAtAround6SoIToldHimICouldNotSleep
#SoHeSaidToPutMyHeadOnHisChest
#IFellAsleepPrettyQuickly
#BeforeIWasPregnantIRarelyFellAsleepLikeThat
#IHadToBeSuperSuperTired
#PeopleTalkALotAboutTheBenefitsOfTheBabyBeingOnYourChest
#ButApparentlyItWorksWellForMeToo
#AsThereHaveBeenAFewTimesLatelyThatIHaveFallenAsleepLikeThat
#MaybeItIsSomeEvolutionaryThingAndFeelingSafe
#IWokeUpWhenMyEarStartedToHurtThough

This picture is a remake of #1 (last image) and #2 (also last image).

My bump has definitely dropped, and the midwife commented on it (she saw me 2 or 3 appointments ago?)

This time around I tried to remake images more often.

I gave Tiago a haircut last week in case I didn’t have the opportunity to do it again for a while.

I think he is also looking forward to relaxing with a baby on his chest again. Those were sweet moments…


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Categories
Pregnancy Waiting II

B And The Bump (35 Weeks / 28th December 2021)

Self-portrait where I am holding B above my bump. She has my hair in her hands and is hiding her eyes. I am kissing her on her forehead.
B And The Bump (35 Weeks / 28th December 2021)
 
#ITookAPhotoOfMeHoldingBWhenIWas24WeeksPregnantAndYouCanSeeABitOfABumpButItIsDefinitelyMorePronouncedNow
#SoIWantToDoASimilarShootAsTimeIsRunningOutAndItCouldBeTheLastPhotoOfBWithMyBump
#IAmDefinitelyGettingToThePointOfBeingBoredWithBeingPregnant
#IDoNotLikeAcidRefluxAndNotBeingAbleToEatAsMuchAsIWant
#IWillEatSomethingAndKnowThatIWillFeelAwfulLaterWhichIsLotsOfFun
#IAmJustGladThatIHaveMoreEnergyNowAndFeelQuiteFit
#IAmNotSureIfIHadAnySideEffectsFromMyBoosterAsIFeltSoRubbishInTheWeekLeadingUpToItAndFeltMuchBetterByTheTimeIHadIt
#ChristmasWasVeryQuietAndWasJustNanTBAndIInTheEnd
#BHadAFewPresentsButNoneFromUsAsWeGotHerHerClimbingFrameAndSlideInTheSummerAndAnythingWeBuyForHerWeGenerallyJustGiveToHerStraightAway
#SheHasACoupleOfMolarsComingThroughAndSheWasInAFunnyMoodAllXmasDay
#IHopeThisTeethingStopsSoonButSheStillHasSpaceInHerMouthForMore
#HerConjunctivitisHasClearedUpNowWhichWeAreRelievedAbout
#WeUsuallyBathHerACoupleOfTimesAWeekButWeWereGivingHerDailyBathsToMakeSureHerEyesWereClean
#IAmSurprisedByHowMuchSheLikesWaterAndDidNotMindUsThrowingWaterAtHerFace
#ThisWeekSheSeemsToHaveLearnedWhatEarsAreAndWhenIAskHerWhereMineAreSheSticksAFingerInMyEar
#IAmNowTryingToTeachHerCheeks
#WhenWePutHerInHerHighchairAndPutHerFoxBibOnMostOfTheTimeSheWillTouchItsNose
#WhenSheFinishesHerBreakfastNowSheUsuallyPassesMeHerBowlWhichIsGood
#IThinkSheHasOfficiallyGrownTiredOfBakedBeansForLunchSoWeAreTryingOutDifferentThings
#WhileSheWasReallyIllSheWasNotEatingMuchSoItIsGoodToSeeHerGettingAnAppetiteAgain
#IGenerallyStruggleABitThisTimeOfTheYearWithMyMentalHealth
#TheOtherDayIJustFeltReallyTrappedInThisHouse
#WeArePlanningToMoveAwayInTheSummerSoIJustNeedToHoldOutUntilThen
#IMissHavingAPlaceOfOurOwnAndIGuessCovidHasComplicatedMatters
#IfItWasNotForCovidThenWeProbablyWouldNotBeHereOrInBirmingham
#ItHasBeenGoodInWaysButIHaveFoundItHardInOtherWays
#IGuessHavingASecondChildSoonWillBeABigDistractionAndTheMonthsWillFlyBy
#IWouldLikeToKnowMorePeopleButItAlsoSeemsABitLateNowIfWePlanToMoveAway
#IJustFeelLikeEveryDayIsTheSameAndWithASecondChildItMayFeelMoreThatWay
#INeedToStartGoingToBedEarlierAsIHaveBeenStayingUpTooLateWatchingShowsAndReadingIGuessAsIKnowThatWhenBabyXIsBornINeedToStartGoingToBedWhenTheyDo

#ITookAPhotoOfMeHoldingBWhenIWas24WeeksPregnantAndYouCanSeeABitOfABumpButItIsDefinitelyMorePronouncedNow

For my 33rd birthday portrait / marking B’s 16 month birthday. Post here.

#SoIWantToDoASimilarShootAsTimeIsRunningOutAndItCouldBeTheLastPhotoOfBWithMyBump

We will see how it goes. B was not very happy last time…

(I put off doing it all day, but in the end it was actually quite nice. She was unhappy at first, but then she started to just play with my hair and seemed to relax. Phew.)

#IAmDefinitelyGettingToThePointOfBeingBoredWithBeingPregnant

I know that once the baby is born my life will change a lot again, but I also just want to move on with our lives.

#IDoNotLikeAcidRefluxAndNotBeingAbleToEatAsMuchAsIWant

So much rich, fatty food at Xmas that is not good for acid reflux…

#IWillEatSomethingAndKnowThatIWillFeelAwfulLaterWhichIsLotsOfFun

Yesterday I had pizza for lunch and a few chocolates afterwards, and I didn’t feel as bad as I thought I would actually. Hurrah.

#IAmJustGladThatIHaveMoreEnergyNowAndFeelQuiteFit

I feel like I am not waddling as much as I was at this point when I was pregnant with B, but maybe it’s because I walk slower and not as far with B, and her pushchair gives me support.

#IAmNotSureIfIHadAnySideEffectsFromMyBoosterAsIFeltSoRubbishInTheWeekLeadingUpToItAndFeltMuchBetterByTheTimeIHadIt

It was hard to tell. I couldn’t feel more lousier than I did before having it.

#ChristmasWasVeryQuietAndWasJustNanTBAndIInTheEnd

Super chill.

#BHadAFewPresentsButNoneFromUsAsWeGotHerHerClimbingFrameAndSlideInTheSummerAndAnythingWeBuyForHerWeGenerallyJustGiveToHerStraightAway

I’d got her some felt tips the week before, but my Mum also gave her some. I guess next year we will have to be more Christmassy.

#SheHasACoupleOfMolarsComingThroughAndSheWasInAFunnyMoodAllXmasDay

It was a bit of a drag at times.

#IHopeThisTeethingStopsSoonButSheStillHasSpaceInHerMouthForMore

*Nervous laugh*

#HerConjunctivitisHasClearedUpNowWhichWeAreRelievedAbout

Hurrah. We’re still trying to clean her eyes a couple of times a day though, just in case it wants to come back.

#WeUsuallyBathHerACoupleOfTimesAWeekButWeWereGivingHerDailyBathsToMakeSureHerEyesWereClean

She loved it. We weren’t planning to give her a bath last night, but she went to the bathroom and looked longingly at the bath. It helps the time before bed go faster, and probably relaxes her so why not. She also uses a lot of energy up splashing about…

#IAmSurprisedByHowMuchSheLikesWaterAndDidNotMindUsThrowingWaterAtHerFace

She has a whale jug that we use and normally splash about with, so we’d splash her and say splash, and she’d laugh. Win.

#ThisWeekSheSeemsToHaveLearnedWhatEarsAreAndWhenIAskHerWhereMineAreSheSticksAFingerInMyEar

Lovely.

#IAmNowTryingToTeachHerCheeks

A lot of blowing my cheeks out and squeezing them.

#WhenWePutHerInHerHighchairAndPutHerFoxBibOnMostOfTheTimeSheWillTouchItsNose

Then I ask her where hers is etc.

#WhenSheFinishesHerBreakfastNowSheUsuallyPassesMeHerBowlWhichIsGood

I don’t like when she starts throwing her food about, so this is good progress. Last night she passed me her yoghurt bowl when she was done.

#IThinkSheHasOfficiallyGrownTiredOfBakedBeansForLunchSoWeAreTryingOutDifferentThings

She had a houmous sandwich the other day, she had some pasta, yeah we need to mix it up more. Sorry B – I got lazy.

#WhileSheWasReallyIllSheWasNotEatingMuchSoItIsGoodToSeeHerGettingAnAppetiteAgain

I was getting a bit worried, though I know she will eat when she wants. She might not eat much of her food sometimes, but she will always steal a bit of whatever we are eating.

#IGenerallyStruggleABitThisTimeOfTheYearWithMyMentalHealth

Dark days where we can’t go out for walks so late etc.

#TheOtherDayIJustFeltReallyTrappedInThisHouse

We’ve lived here for 14 months now, and we’re very grateful to my Nan for letting us live with her.

#WeArePlanningToMoveAwayInTheSummerSoIJustNeedToHoldOutUntilThen

There aren’t many short term options now and it does not seem worth it now.

#IMissHavingAPlaceOfOurOwnAndIGuessCovidHasComplicatedMatters

It’s good to know that Nan is fine and that she is being looked after, but I also can’t wait to have our own place where I feel a bit more relaxed.

#IfItWasNotForCovidThenWeProbablyWouldNotBeHereOrInBirmingham

T and I were talking about how things might be now if it wasn’t for Covid. I’m really not sure. I guess we might have moved closer to a park in Liverpool, or we might have just put up with living in the city centre (it wasn’t that much of a chore, but just not that kid friendly) and I’d be taking B to the museums every day…

#ItHasBeenGoodInWaysButIHaveFoundItHardInOtherWays

There’s space for us at my Nan’s, I haven’t been worried about her (I used to call her every day before living with her), she lives in a safe area and close to a park etc.

I just feel trapped as there aren’t many places to go within walking distance, Covid makes me not want to go to the few places that we could go to, I don’t know many people etc.

#IGuessHavingASecondChildSoonWillBeABigDistractionAndTheMonthsWillFlyBy

Once the baby is born I guess I will go into a baby tunnel.

#IWouldLikeToKnowMorePeopleButItAlsoSeemsABitLateNowIfWePlanToMoveAway

It’s been so difficult trying to meet other parents. Everyone has their old schedules too which makes it more complicated. We can’t invite new friends round to my Nan’s (well we could, but it’s not the best set-up), and I don’t feel that comfortable with going to other people’s homes, because of Covid.

#IJustFeelLikeEveryDayIsTheSameAndWithASecondChildItMayFeelMoreThatWay

I’ve been complaining about Groundhog Day vibes for a while. I’m glad we’re having a second kid now though, rather than leaving it until later. It does make sense as I’m really not up to much.

#INeedToStartGoingToBedEarlierAsIHaveBeenStayingUpTooLateWatchingShowsAndReadingIGuessAsIKnowThatWhenBabyXIsBornINeedToStartGoingToBedWhenTheyDo

I finished reading House of Gucci yesterday. I’m currently watching a series of Survivor Australia at 2x speed, and skipping through it a bit as the episodes are too long.

I need to read my hypnobirthing book again, and just go to bed earlier.

35 weeks pregnant with B comparison:

Self-portrait with my hands supporting my bump, and a patch of dried colostrum is visible on my dress by where my right nipple is.
Yes, That Is Dried Colostrum (35 weeks)
 
#InMyHeadIHaveBeenCountingDownTo42Weeks
#AsTheySayThatUsuallyYourFirstBabyArrivesLate
#ButTalkingToPeopleLatelyEveryonesStorySeemsToInvolveTheBabyComingEarly
#SoIGuessNowThereIsAChanceThatEveryShootForThisProjectCouldBeTheLast
#BabyDefinitelySeemsMoreActiveTheseDays
#SoMaybeItHasJustGotToThePointWhereItsMovementsAreNotShelteredByThePlacentaSoMuch
#LastNightIWasHavingALotOfBraxtonHicksContractionsIThink
#SomeWereQuitePainful
#WhenBabyHiccupsItIsQuiteUncomfortable
#ThisMorningTiagoPointedToAWetPatchOnMyDress
#MyRightBoobHadLeaked
#ItHasBeen6WeeksSinceMyLeftBoobFirstLeaked
#IThinkOneOfThemHasLeakedSinceButICanNotRememberWhichOneAndItDidNotSeemThatSignificant
#TodayItDidForSomeReason
#SoMaybeMyRightBoobHasLeakedBefore
#IHaveAScratchOnMyBellyWhichIMustHaveDoneWithAFingerNail
#TiagoAlsoHadToPointThatOutAsICouldNotSeeIt
#YesterdayIWentOutByMyselfForTheFirstTimeSinceBeforeLockdown
#IWentForAWalkWhilstTiagoWentToTheSupermarket
#IFeltSelfConsciousByMyselfAsINoticedPeopleStaringAtMyBump
#IWalkedOnTheSideOfThePathAndYetPeopleWouldPassSuperCloseByMe
#IWasOnThePhoneTheWholeTimeSoItMadeItNotSoBad
#WeFinallyGotSomeWholemealFlourSoIPlanToMakeSomePancakes
#IHaveNotHadThemInSoLong
#IDidNotAskTiagoToBuyMyFavouriteChocolateOatMilkAsIThoughtIShouldHaveAWeekWithoutIt
#ButNowIReallyWantSome
#IThinkLockdownIsStartingToGetToMeALittleMoreNow
#IJustWantToSpendAWeekendAtMyNansAndKeepHerCompany
#ButItIsLookingLikeItWillNotHappenBeforeTheBabyIsBornDueToRulesAndAll
#AndOnceTheBabyIsBornIDoNotThinkItWillBeAGoodIdeaForABit

Lol at the first two hashtags – B came before 38 weeks.

I thought I leaked a lot earlier than this, so I feel a little less worried now. I got given a colostrum kit today. (Oh wait, it said I leaked 6 weeks before.)

I still don’t like hiccups. I didn’t think that B was that active, but this baby is a lot more active.

I go out loads without Tiago, but usually just for walks with B. I do go to the local shops by myself sometimes, and I went to my midwife appointment alone today.

When I picked up B’s prescription a woman with a walking stick said I should sit down on the chair, so I must be looking quite pregnant to other people.

I’ve been on about making pancakes for a long time, and I haven’t. I finally bought some maple syrup the other day, so I should try to do it soon. Reading this makes me want some now.

‘#IJustWantToSpendAWeekendAtMyNansAndKeepHerCompany’

Well, we’ve spent many weekends with her over the last year+…

Self-portrait of Tiago and me hugging. We are hugging so that my bump is to the side of him.
Hugs Are Different When You’ve Got A Bump (35 weeks)

#ThePictureWasSupposedToShowHowWeHaveToHugNow
#ThoughIAmNotSureHowWellItShowsThat
#IAmSoUnawareOfHowBigMyBumpIsSometimes
#LookingDownIsSoDifferentToSeeingItSideOnInTheMirror
#WellEvenLookingDownIKnowItIsBig
#ButStillIBumpIntoThings
#INearlyKnockedAPlateOffTheTableTheOtherDayWithIt
#OrITryToGiveTiagoAHugFromBehindAndJustBumpIntoHim
#IHaveToHugHimWithMyBumpToTheSide
#HeOnlyGoesToTheBigSupermarketOnceAWeek
#ButWeGoToASmallShopOnceAWeekForBitsAndBobsWeNeed
#LikeTomatoesAndMushroomsAsWeSeemToRunOutOfThoseQuick
#SoTodayIAskedForSomeChocolateMilkAsIHaveBeenThinkingAboutItForAFewDays
#ItIsNotMyFavouriteOneAsYouCanOnlyGetThatAtTheBigSupermarket
#ThatIsProbablyBoringButIAmHappyThatIGotSome
#TodayIBoughtSomeMaternityPants
#IDoNotKnowIfIHaveAHomebirthIfIWillGetGivenThoseHospitalStylePants
#SoIBoughtSomeAsWhenIThinkOfPhotographingMyselfPostBirthIThinkOfAPhotoByRinekeDijkstraWithTheMotherWearingThosePants
#ThoughActuallyInTheOtherTwoPicturesTheyAreNotWearingPants
#WeShallSeeHowSoonIEndUpTakingAPictureAfterBirth
#TheMoreIThinkAboutItTheMoreIWantPicturesOfTheBirth
#ButIGuessItDependsOnHowThingsGo
#AndIThinkTiagoDoesNotWantTheResponsibilityOfTakingPictures
#AndWeBothWantToJustExperienceTheBirthAsMuchAsWeCanWithoutDistractions
#IAlsoBoughtADressThatICanNurseIn
#IBoughtABreastfeedingScarfAWhileAgoForMorePrivacy
#ButAtThisRateIDoubtIWillBeDoingMuchFeedingAwayFromHome
#IAmIWillNotFeelSelfConsciousDoingIt
#IThinkTheBabysNeedWillOverTakeAwkwardnessOrIHopeSoAnyways
#ItIsSuchANaturalThingThatItIsAShameThatPeopleGetOffendedByIt

Yeah, we have to hug like that again now.

I’m definitely bumping my bump into things, and Tiago often knocks it as he goes past…

I didn’t use my maternity pants, but I’ve dug them out as a maybe for my hospital bag this time.

I definitely want to get a picture or two of me giving birth this time, but we’ll see.

I never used the breastfeeding scarf… I hope breastfeeding is easier this time.


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Categories
Pregnancy Waiting II

Imitating B With Conjunctivitis (34 Weeks / 24th December 2021)

Self-portrait with makeup around my eyes to make them look a bit sore/like when B had conjunctivitis.
Imitating B With Conjunctivitis (34 Weeks / 24th December 2021)
 
#ImitatingBWithTwoRedEyesDueToConjunctivitisIsNotTheNicestPortraitICouldTakeButItHasDominatedOurWeek
#ISeemToHaveBeenInSimilarHealthToHowIWas6WeeksAgoWhenIWasBeingSickALotAndFeelingWeakInGeneral
#IWentToBedFiveDaysAgoFeelingSickAndWokeUpAt1AndWasSickThenSickAgainAnHourLaterAndThenAgainNotLongAfterThat
#ITriedToHaveAShowerAndSleepOnTheSofaButMyNanAlsoCouldNotSleepSoWantedAShowerAndCameIntoTheLivingRoomEarly
#SoIWentBackToBedButDidNotSleepMuchAndKeptBeingSickUntilAbout11ThoughItWasJustWaterThatWasComingUp
#TypicallyItWasTheOneDayWhereBDidNotHaveNurseryAndMyMumWasNotComingOverButTiagoManagedToWorkWhileWatchingBAndIHadALieDown
#InTheAfternoonIHadABathAndBWasQuiteHappyJustSplashingHerHandsInTheWaterAndDroppingHerToysIn
#BHasANewTrickOfPuttingStuffInTheBinAndRippingToiletPaperAndLiftingTheToiletLidUpToPutItInTheToilet
#ITryToDiscourageHerButEvenGettingHerHandTrappedACoupleOfTimesHasNotPutHerOff
#ThisIsProbablyHowSheHasGotConjunctivitisOrMaybeSheGotItFromNursery
#IHadNoticedHerEyesWereABitGunkyButThoughtItWouldPassButByTheNextDayItWasWorse
#IWentToOurLocalPharmacyToGetEyeDropsButTheyWereClosedDueToStaffSickness
#SoMyMumWentToADifferentOneButTheySaidThatTheDropsWereOnlySuitableFor2AndOver
#IKeptWashingHerEyesWithCooledBoiledWaterAndTriedASlightlySaltySolutionTooWhichMightBeWhyTheSkinAroundHerEyesWasSuperRed
#MyDoctorsAreOnlyReallyDealingWithBoostersAtTheMomentSoIWaitedForHalfAnHourToSpeakToTheWalkInCentreButHadCalledAnotherDoctorsByMistake
#SoIWaitedAnotherHalfAnHourToActuallySpeakToTheWalkInAndTheySaidSomeoneWouldCallLater
#TypicallyTheyCalledThe10MinutesThatIWasAwayFromMyPhoneAsBWasAsleepOnMeInHerRoomAndIThoughtIWasJustGoingInToGetHerUpFromHerNap
#After3HoursICalledAgainAndTheySaidSomeoneWouldCallWithinAnHourButTheyCalledBackAbout3HoursLaterAtAround6
#TheCallWasShortAndHePrescribedEyeOintmentThatHeSaidWasOkayForUnder2s
#IShouldHaveAskedForHimWhichPharmacyWasStillOpenButInsteadIHadItSentToOurLocalOneForTheMorning
#WeGotItInTheMorningButSheHadToMissNurseryAsSheWasTooIllToGoReally
#IWasReallyLookingForwardToJustHavingSomeTimeInBedToRestAndRecoverButOhWell
#TiagoWasAlsoFeelingWeakAsHeHadHisBoosterSoWeHaveBeenAVeryFunFamilyThisWeek
#ItIsTheFirstTimeThatWeHaveAllBeenUnderTheWeatherTogetherAndIHopeItDoesNotHappenAgainForAWhile
#TodayWasTheFirstDayIHadEnoughEnergyToDoMyUsualMorningStretchingAndMyAppetiteIsPrettyMuchBackToNormalNow
#IHadMyBoosterVaccineYesterdayAndItWasSoQuickAndOrganisedThisTimeWhichWasGreat
#IAmSoGladThatTheBabyDidNotComeThisWeekAsIHadNoEnergyAtAllSoNowINeedToMakeSureIFeelGoodForWhenLabourBegins
#MyAcidRefluxHasBeenPrettyBadForACoupleOfWeeksSoIAmLookingForwardToThatBeingOver
#HadMy34WeekMidwifeAppointmentAndAllIsFineAlthoughTheBabyIsCurrentlyHeadDownButBackToBack
#ISaidAtLeastTheyAreNotBreechButTheWomanSaidItWouldBeASlowLongLabourWithALotOfBackPainSoLetsHopeTheyMoveBeforeThen

#ImitatingBWithTwoRedEyesDueToConjunctivitisIsNotTheNicestPortraitICouldTakeButItHasDominatedOurWeek

B cries whenever she sees me coming towards her with cotton wool, and giving her ointment is an experience every time.

#ISeemToHaveBeenInSimilarHealthToHowIWas6WeeksAgoWhenIWasBeingSickALotAndFeelingWeakInGeneral

Great.

#IWentToBedFiveDaysAgoFeelingSickAndWokeUpAt1AndWasSickThenSickAgainAnHourLaterAndThenAgainNotLongAfterThat

It’s horrid. My throat then hurt from being sick so much. Fun.

#ITriedToHaveAShowerAndSleepOnTheSofaButMyNanAlsoCouldNotSleepSoWantedAShowerAndCameIntoTheLivingRoomEarly

I wanted to feel nice after all the sick, but it was not meant to be. I thought sleeping on the sofa would be best as to not wake T and B up when I was being sick.

#SoIWentBackToBedButDidNotSleepMuchAndKeptBeingSickUntilAbout11ThoughItWasJustWaterThatWasComingUp

Lovely. It was a long night. I don’t like those nights.

#TypicallyItWasTheOneDayWhereBDidNotHaveNurseryAndMyMumWasNotComingOverButTiagoManagedToWorkWhileWatchingBAndIHadALieDown

He’s got 6 days off over Xmas (it’s currently day 2), so he didn’t want to take more time off. I felt so weak that I could not do much, so lying down in bed was good but I could not sleep.

#InTheAfternoonIHadABathAndBWasQuiteHappyJustSplashingHerHandsInTheWaterAndDroppingHerToysIn

I should have a bath on days like that in future, as it’s a good way to keep B occupied while I don’t feel too crummy as I’m relaxing and resting.

#BHasANewTrickOfPuttingStuffInTheBinAndRippingToiletPaperAndLiftingTheToiletLidUpToPutItInTheToilet

It seemed cute, but obviously we need to properly wash her hands after every time she does it now.

#ITryToDiscourageHerButEvenGettingHerHandTrappedACoupleOfTimesHasNotPutHerOff

I don’t like her wasting toilet paper. We should buy a toilet seat lock really.

#ThisIsProbablyHowSheHasGotConjunctivitisOrMaybeSheGotItFromNursery

She’s had a cold from nursery for over a week.

#IHadNoticedHerEyesWereABitGunkyButThoughtItWouldPassButByTheNextDayItWasWorse

Fail. I just thought it was a bit of sleep or something.

#IWentToOurLocalPharmacyToGetEyeDropsButTheyWereClosedDueToStaffSickness

Great.

#SoMyMumWentToADifferentOneButTheySaidThatTheDropsWereOnlySuitableFor2AndOver

Also great.

#IKeptWashingHerEyesWithCooledBoiledWaterAndTriedASlightlySaltySolutionTooWhichMightBeWhyTheSkinAroundHerEyesWasSuperRed

I wish she understood that we’re trying to help her feel better. It’s such a struggle to try to get them better.

#MyDoctorsAreOnlyReallyDealingWithBoostersAtTheMomentSoIWaitedForHalfAnHourToSpeakToTheWalkInCentreButHadCalledAnotherDoctorsByMistake

Ergh.

#SoIWaitedAnotherHalfAnHourToActuallySpeakToTheWalkInAndTheySaidSomeoneWouldCallLater

Cool.

#TypicallyTheyCalledThe10MinutesThatIWasAwayFromMyPhoneAsBWasAsleepOnMeInHerRoomAndIThoughtIWasJustGoingInToGetHerUpFromHerNap

She woke up early. I planned to get her up, but then wanted to soothe her a bit and she fell asleep on me while I sat on her beanbag. I had to wake her up as my back was hurting and I was bored sitting in the dark without my phone – I would have read my book.

#After3HoursICalledAgainAndTheySaidSomeoneWouldCallWithinAnHourButTheyCalledBackAbout3HoursLaterAtAround6

I understand they’re busy and swamped, so it’s fair enough. I just don’t like waiting around for calls.

#TheCallWasShortAndHePrescribedEyeOintmentThatHeSaidWasOkayForUnder2s

He said that the drops is not okay for under 2s, but the ointment is.

#IShouldHaveAskedForHimWhichPharmacyWasStillOpenButInsteadIHadItSentToOurLocalOneForTheMorning

I hoped that they would be open.

#WeGotItInTheMorningButSheHadToMissNurseryAsSheWasTooIllToGoReally

The instructions said it wasn’t for under 2s, but the NHS website says that chloramphenicol eye stuff can be prescribed for under 2s by a Doctor.

#IWasReallyLookingForwardToJustHavingSomeTimeInBedToRestAndRecoverButOhWell

I was looking forward to just lying down for 4 hours, watching a bit of TV and resting.

#TiagoWasAlsoFeelingWeakAsHeHadHisBoosterSoWeHaveBeenAVeryFunFamilyThisWeek

We had an orzo dish on Sunday night that I’m bored of, but Tiago loves. I threw that up, then didn’t have much on Monday night, but Tiago did and was sick on Tuesday morning. Maybe it was the orzo that triggered off my ‘illness’? Who knows? I’m glad that Tiago doesn’t want to eat it for a while now.

#ItIsTheFirstTimeThatWeHaveAllBeenUnderTheWeatherTogetherAndIHopeItDoesNotHappenAgainForAWhile

I don’t like feeling so weak and helpless.

#TodayWasTheFirstDayIHadEnoughEnergyToDoMyUsualMorningStretchingAndMyAppetiteIsPrettyMuchBackToNormalNow

I kept forcing myself to eat for the baby, but it’s been tough. It’s nice to enjoy food again – just in time for Xmas.

#IHadMyBoosterVaccineYesterdayAndItWasSoQuickAndOrganisedThisTimeWhichWasGreat

Tiago dropped me off and I was confused as they’d moved from a marquee in a car park, into a building. It was so efficient. 5 stars.

I’m still not feeling 100%, which may be down to the booster, but as I felt so bad earlier in the week I feel quite good.

#IAmSoGladThatTheBabyDidNotComeThisWeekAsIHadNoEnergyAtAllSoNowINeedToMakeSureIFeelGoodForWhenLabourBegins

I don’t want to feel that weak again for a long time.

#MyAcidRefluxHasBeenPrettyBadForACoupleOfWeeksSoIAmLookingForwardToThatBeingOver

I went to get something for it, but the pharmacist said it’s best to avoid taking anything really. Being ill this week has meant I haven’t overeaten, so I just need to keep to smaller meals and I sleep with my head elevated, which is meant to be a good thing.

#HadMy34WeekMidwifeAppointmentAndAllIsFineAlthoughTheBabyIsCurrentlyHeadDownButBackToBack #ISaidAtLeastTheyAreNotBreechButTheWomanSaidItWouldBeASlowLongLabourWithALotOfBackPainSoLetsHopeTheyMoveBeforeThen

Well, B was head down in the opposite to back to back until the day before she was born so fingers crossed. Reading about it, it looks like I just need to sit leaning forwards more, not sleep on my back (I often wake up on my back and can’t be bothered to shift), and a lot of babies turn round during labour.

34 weeks pregnant with B comparison:

Self-portrait where I am squatting while in my bra and pants, but my pants are barely visible due to my bump.
I Know It Does Not Look Like It But Swear That I Am Wearing Pants (34 weeks)
 
#TimeIsFlyingBy
#LastNightIHadTheWorstNightsSleepInAges
#JustWakingUpConstantlyAndHavingWeirdDreams
#IPlannedToHaveALieInButOfCourseIWokeUpEarlyAndCouldNotFallBackToSleep
#ItWasGettingLateAndIHadNotFeltTheBabyMovingSoIWasGettingWorried
#EventuallyIFeltMovementsAndWasRelieved
#LastNightTiagoFellAsleepSpooningMyBump
#ISawTheCarSeatTodayAndFreakedOutALittleThinkingWhyDoWeHaveACarSeat
#IMomentarilyForgotIWasPregnant
#WhichIsWeirdAsItDefinitelyIsGettingUncomfortableNow
#TiagoSaidThatHeHasNoticedOnOurDailyWalksThatIAmStartingToWalkABitWeird
#IAskedHimDoYouMeanIAmWaddling
#HeSaidYes
#IDoNotThinkItIsVeryPronouncedButIGuessItMustBeEnoughForTiagoToNotice
#IProbablyWouldNotHaveChosenToBePregnantDuringAPandemic
#ButAtTheSameTimeIFeelLikeIAmNotMissingOutOnStuff
#AndItIsNiceToHaveSomeKindOfCountdown
#AsIThinkALotOfPeopleAreJustWaitingForThingsToChange
#IThoughtMyProjectTitleWasSmartWhenICameUpWithItEarlyOn
#NowItWouldBeMoreLike
#WaitingForThingsInATimeWhenEveryoneIsWaitingForSomething
#ButIGuessTheOldTitleKindOfAppliesToOurEra
#UnlessThingsWillNeverBeTheSameAgain
#WellLikeIHaveSaidBeforeThingsWillNeverBeTheSameAgainForMeAnywaysOnceTheBabyIsBorn
#ThingsWillBeDifferentForTiagoTooButNotToTheSameExtent
#HisBodyWillBeTheSameAndHisWorkShouldStillBeFairlyTheSame
#BeforeIWasPregnantWeWerePrettyMuchTheSameSize
#SameHeightSameShoeSizeICouldWearHisClothesApartFromTrousersWhichICouldFitInButWereALittleTooTight
#IAmJustHappyThatIAmStillExercisingAndIThinkStartingWhenIWasMoreAbleToHelped
#TheSameVideosThatIHaveBeenDoingForMonthsAreGettingHarderToDoNow

Good to know my sleep was also rubbish at 34 weeks last time, but I wasn’t being super sick/feeling weak. I was often waking up at 5 and not being able to sleep again, but with B I am more tired so tend to sleep until she wakes up.

I’m having a lot of weird dreams at the moment too. Super vivid.

I don’t think I am waddling too much at the moment, but usually when I walk I am behind B’s pushchair so it is good support.

This time I did choose to be pregnant during a pandemic. I didn’t think it would be getting worse though (cases are on the rise).

A close-up photo of my belly button. A remake of an image I took at 20 and a half weeks.
My Belly Button Has Never Been So Close Or Perhaps So Far Away (34 weeks)

#ISaidAt20AndAHalfWeeksThatMyBellyButtonHadNeverBeenSoClose
#MaybeNowItIsCloserOrMaybeNot
#CloseToWhatQuestionMarkMyFaceQuestionMark
#IGuessMaybeItIsFurtherAwayNow
#ButItIsFarOut
#MyBellyButtonHasNeverBeenSoFarOut
#ItSoundsLikeASurferOrSomething
#IWishICouldReachMyHeadDownAndRestItOnBump
#IWasSayingWithMyLastPictureThatBabyWasNotMovingMuchAndFreakingMeOut
#ThenTheNextDayItWasMovingAroundLoads
#AndTodayHasBeenAnAverageDay
#EvenSittingOnMyBallIsUncomfortableTheseDays
#WellIFeelComfortableWhilstIAmSatDown
#ThenWhenIStandUpIAmInPain
#LyingDownSittingUpGettingOutOfBedIsAnnoying
#TodayIHadAVideoCallWithTheWomenFromMyNCTGroup
#WeWereTalkingAboutInductionsAndWantingToWait
#ButThenSayingHowUnconfortableWeAreSoWhoKnowsWhatWeWillDecideAtTheTime
#IReadALotOfMyHypnobirthingBookToday
#IHaveBeenGettingABitRubbishAtReadingAndPreparingForBaby
#IStillNeedToDoMyBirthPlan
#SomeWomenOnTheCallWereTalkingAboutHavingTheirHospitalBagsPacked
#IThinkIAmTheOnlyOnePlanningForAHomeBirth
#ButIShouldPackABagJustInCaseAsYouNeverKnow
#IHadNeverHeardAboutNaturalOrGentleCaesareansBeforeDoingTheHypnobirthingCourse
#WithTheBirthPlanItIsABitMoreOfBirthPreferencesThanAPlan
#AndWritingDownWhatYouWouldWantForAnyPossibleSituation
#ItFeelsGoodToKnowMyOptionsAndThatThereAreOptions
#IHaveHeardOfBirthPlansBeingMockedABitButGivingBirthIsABigEventWhichCouldImpactYouForTheRestOfYourLife
#IAmSoGladThatILearnedAboutHypnobirthingAndSeeingBirthInAMorePositiveLight

This is a remake of an image I took at 20 and a half weeks.

It does look really far out this time too, and B likes to touch it when I say ‘where’s the baby?’

Earlier in the week I was getting stressed about movements, but they seem to have been quite active and I have been distracted by B’s eyes and my health.

Our bed is comfier now so I do not have as many pains in bed, but it is still best for me to lie on my left side.

I need to do a birth plan, and reread the hypnobirthing book but I am currently trying to read House of Gucci. Once that is done I am going to focus on baby, I swear. I tried to find B’s baby clothes this morning, but they weren’t where I thought they were, and I need to pack my hospital bag.

The first image on this page is the picture I am referring to in the hashtags.

My sister got me some nice new pyjamas for Xmas, and mentioned my Grandad’s pyjamas.

My Grandad was married to my Nan who we have been living with since late October 2020, so every once in a while I feel sad that Tiago and B and baby X never got to meet him.

B didn’t meet her Portuguese Grandparents until this summer, and she is still yet to meet Tiago’s brother, his wife and their daughter. We did a video call with them all today.

I’m gutted that Tiago’s paternity hasn’t improved since he was off with B, but I’m looking forward to him having two weeks off. He’s going to do the same again – one week of paternity, and one week of annual leave.

It’s good to know that I felt uncomfortable after sitting on the exercise ball, as I thought I didn’t, and I’m getting those pains now.

I didn’t go into another building until I gave birth to B in hospital…


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Categories
Oh Me, Oh Mãe

What I Wore For My Four Night Hospital Stay After Giving Birth

So when I was in hospital I basically wore the same dress the whole time. After getting home I washed everything apart from it as I knew I wanted to photograph myself in it, though now I have decided to keep it as part of my ‘archive’ (I feel funny saying that even though I have so much work).

Anyways, it seems weird to continue my pregnancy project now I’m no longer pregnant, so with motherhood I have started a new project called Oh Me, Oh Mãe. I came up with the title whilst I was still pregnant as a play on the phrase oh me oh my. I tried with and without a comma and I seem to prefer it with one.

Mãe is mother in Portuguese (my husband is Portuguese and our baby is British-Portuguese, or Portuguese-British depending on who you ask). You pronounce mãe similarly to my, though you can listen to the pronunciation here and tell me I’m wrong. Maybe it’s more like myy.

A funny coincidence was that I listened to Devendra Banhart a lot in hospital and it wasn’t until getting home that I realised he has an album called Oh Me Oh My… It seems meant to be, though I was a bit discouraged as Tiago (my husband) had never heard the phrase oh me oh my before and didn’t like it for ages. Now he gets it and I think it is here to stay. If you ever need an honest non-artists opinion on something he is your guy!

So… the photo and hashtags (yes I think I am still doing the hashtags for some stuff, but I seem to be experimenting with other writing styles on different pictures).

What I Wore For My Four Night Hospital Stay After Giving Birth #WeHadPackedTheBagJustInCaseACoupleOfWeeksPreviouslyEvenThoughWeWerePlanningForAHomeBirth #IThoughtAtLeastEverythingIMightNeedEvenForHomeWouldBeInTheSamePlace #IKeptSayingWeShouldRevisitThemButWeNeverGotRoundToItEspeciallyAsSomeThingsWeNeededForEverydayUse #SoWhenICalledTheHospitalToSayMyWatersHadBrokeTheySaidToBringBagsInJustInCase #WeSpentHalfAnHourRushingRoundButIDidNotTakeItTooSeriously #INearlyDidNotPackThisDressAsItWasWhatIWasWearingInBedWhenMyWatersBroke #ItWasALittleWetAndItDidNotSmellSoIPutItInMyBagThinkingIWouldBeComingHomeSoonForMyHomeBirth #WellObviouslyIDidNotComeHomeAndWasInHospitalFor4Nights #AndILivedInThisDress #ICouldHaveAskedTiagoToBringMoreThingsButByTheTimeIThoughtAboutItIKnewMyStayWasComingToAnEnd #OriginallyIWasInHospitalDueToProblemsWithBreastfeedingAndThenBabyBGotJaundice #TheDressShowsColostrumStainsAndThenMilkStainsAfterMyMilkCameInOnDay3 #ItWouldHaveBeenEvenMessierThanThisButOftenISatWithMyDressOffToDoSkinToSkin #SoManyWomenTouchedMyBoobsDuringMyStayToHelpMeTryToFeedSoIDidNotCareAnymore #PlusAround6PeopleWereAtTheBirthPlusTiago #ItWasWeirdToSuddenlyBeAroundSoManyPeopleAfterHavingNotSeenMyFamilyFor3MonthsDueToCovid #MyCurtainWasNeverFullyClosedAsThereWasALightSwitchJustBehindItThatTheHospitalStaffUsed #SoPotentiallyPeopleCouldSeeInButIReallyDidNotCare #AfterAFewDaysIThoughtIBetterWearSomethingElseButItWasTooHot #TheOtherWomenOnTheWardProbablyJudgedMeForWearingAStainCoveredDress #ButSoManyCameAndWentBeforeMe #IDidNotWearMyWatchBecauseOfBreastfeeding #ISometimesWoreANursingBraButInTheBeginningIDidNotAndThenIUsedBreastPadsOnceMyMilkCameIn #IHadMyEyeMaskOnMyHeadAllTheTimeAndEvenAfterIGotHome #TheJokeWasIWasNotSleepingThoughAndIStillAmNotReally #IBoughtItAsItWasOnARecommendedHospitalListButIAlsoThoughtItWouldBeGoodForHomeAsIFindItHardToSleep #ItWasProbablyTheMostUsefulThingInMyHospitalBagInTheEndAndIAmUsingItAtHome #AndThenIWasGladThatIWoreMySandalsAndNotTrainers #SoEasyToJustSlipO

A few outtakes

(Though I’m thinking maybe it could be a set of images, I don’t know?)

I’m calling this one ‘zombie mum’ – can you tell I hadn’t slept much in the week+ since she was born? I don’t think I really slept for another week.
A classic head to waist-ish shot.
Mmm armpits… though I like the closeup as it kind of looks like a face – two eyes on my boobs and a bit of roundness around my belly as a mouth.

Comments

The whole picture has a similar vibe to my 21st April 2017 (Today’s Look) picture, which I did think about when I was doing the shoot. Different flat and a post-birth belly instead of a hot water bottle, toothpaste stains on one and colostrum/milk stains on the other. With 21st April 2017… it was the first time that I’d wrote a long piece of text to go with a photo, which definitely started to help me feel more confident with my own words.

21st April 2017 (Today’s Look) from Don’t Take Me Out Of My Melons (2017-18).

Old top that I don’t like wearing in public anymore as it took me too long to realise that if I lean over I flash my bra/boobs, trousers that I wore out once in public but felt self-conscious wearing so they are now in the homewear only pile (with toothpaste stains as I can’t seem to brush my teeth without making a mess anymore), 2 pairs of slippers (one – my pair – not really visible, boyfriend’s pair visible), no makeup (haven’t worn any makeup since July, wore makeup twice last year – once for a costume party and once for 1 wedding out of 3 that I attended), brushed hair that I washed yesterday (it’s usually every 4ish days), hairy legs as I haven’t ‘dealt’ with them since February (I went on holiday to warmer climates) and a hot water bottle for period pain as I try to avoid painkillers as much as possible (except when it comes to tooth pain – wisdom tooth removal is not pleasant). 

Also hidden: Bracelet that I made when I was a teenager, a watch (boyfriend’s one that he gave to me after my similar one broke – which was identical to one I bought in 2009, my parents also wear similar watches), a bra (fairly old, I hate bra shopping so I usually just wear the ones that my mum gets me for Christmas), armpit hair (my skin is sensitive, shaving is too much work and epilating hurts so I’m going to try to embrace the neatly trimmed armpit hair look this summer whilst being self-conscious about it), 2 x temporary medicated fillings (I’ve never been to the dentist as many times as I have this year), permanent fillings (wish I had looked after my teeth better – can’t be bothered to go and count them in the mirror), pants (I’ve never been into small underwear, these ones I don’t wear very often but I need to wash my clothes – they are meant to be not be visible through clothes but I still see them under the new trousers I bought so I’m too self-conscious to wear those too), pubic hair (I’ve never understood the prepubescent look/can’t be bothered with more pain), menstrual cup (wish I had bought one years before I did) and a liner (because the cup still isn’t perfect).

I guess walking around loads in front of people in a massively stain covered dress is something I wouldn’t have done pre-baby, but since having B I have changed so much already. I plan to do a photo and text about that soon.

Well you probably won’t catch me walking around Liverpool in it either, but my clothes definitely have more stains on them and I care less. With this project I don’t want to change how I look before doing a shoot if I’m suddenly in the mood. So far that has meant mainly just not retying my hair/brushing it, and my hair misbehaving has ruined a lot of shoots in the past so I guess they’re going to be slightly irritating pictures (I call myself a lazy perfectionist – love perfection, but get annoyed trying to achieve it).

I love it when everything is in ‘the right place’ in a photo and you’ve just got a bit of hair that is doing its own thing, and continues to do its own thing no matter how many times you brush it, restyle it (I don’t style my hair – but I guess more retying it and trying a lower ponytail or something) or try to tuck it away (that is a common approach of mine).

It seems weird posting pictures where there is a big focus on my boobs and all the stains on and around them. I was feeling really awkward about the nudity in my pregnancy project, but since giving birth I also care less. My work is not sexual and my boobs are finally being used for the purpose that I have them for. I remember in high school being mocked for having no boobs (two paracetamols on an ironing board, haha) and me saying ‘well they’re only made for babies anyways’ whilst crying on the inside.

(I feel the need to say I can totally understand why people choose not to breastfeed/use their breastmilk – it is definitely a journey, and if you don’t have kids or don’t want them then enjoy not being covered in stains and having sore nipples).

Rewritten 2003 diary entry for my 2013 project Your Mind & Body Is All That You’ve Got II.

I feel like this sums up my feelings about my misbehaving hair and having no boobs – I was happy having none though (if people had left me alone about it) and I still don’t think having boobs suits me. Time was a club that I don’t think I ever went to.

(I just thought about that calculator thing where the answer upside down is boobless).

I was not sure whether or not to start posting this new project whilst I’m still trying to finish posting my pregnancy project on Instagram, but I think I need to get on with it otherwise I’m going to be months behind with posting it – and B is already growing so fast!

I think that’s it for now… Thanks for reading 🙂


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