2021 dragged at times, but it also feels like it went quite fast.
It is weird how things work. Yesterday I was thinking about how I am 22 times older than B.
New series. Great. We had forgotten that it was New Year’s Eve, so we agreed to both be in bed by 9 to hang out.
I guess it was a safer option for a lot of people to meet up, rather than be indoors.
It really startled me.
When I woke up I was so shocked I said ‘Tiago!’, but he just said ‘what?’ and rolled over. I had turned B’s machine up.
I looked up 18 month sleep regression and a lot of boxes were checked.
I had put it on the lowest setting, but it didn’t seem high enough.
We are constantly cleaning her eyes, wiping her nose, wiping away dribble etc.
She did it a couple of days in a row, and then stopped. We wash her hands when she gets home. Sometimes I use sanitiser, but I worry it is too strong for her.
She tried to sit in the baby bath, so I thought I should get the bouncer out for her, then I was worried that she liked it too much that she would be trying to sit on the baby…
It is stressing me out.
I was sure I had put them in a cupboard in our bedroom, but nope. There is a shoulder bag of mine that I have not seen in the couple of weeks that I have been searching, so I am wondering if they are in there, but I kind of doubt it. Thinking about it there is another bag of mine that I haven’t seen either… Hmm. The shoulder bag is probably just full of my bags…
It’s so annoying. I want to find them ASAP.
I might pack my bag later or tomorrow.
We have a couple of new sleepsuits that we got as B’s are a bit overwashed and worn as she lived in them, so we need to get a couple more and some vests really. That’s it. I’ve found some cardigans and hats.
I’m enjoying reading a book about the Carpenters at the moment. It’s just a short read, then I will reread the book. To be fair I wrote down the main points in an email to myself and it’s enough really, but I feel like I’d feel calmer if I reread the book.
I don’t want to pump as much as I did last time, but it’s good to be organised. I wasn’t planning to pump at all last time, but we got given a pump and a friend lent us the steriliser so we were all set up for it when we got home from hospital.
I have put a reminder in my calendar. I think you can keep them for 6 weeks or so, so I’ll just order it next week.
B goes to bed and we’re like ‘freedom to do what we want’, which is me usually sitting at my computer doing some work, then stretching, and T is usually just having some time to himself and doing bits of work. I guess us not having our own place has made it this way too.
Less, less, less. I definitely feel better for it.
We know how important it is to keep our bond strong (cheesy, but true), so that we can navigate the potentially difficult journey ahead (cliche) a bit easier.
Again, fingers crossed.
Potential forever home, as if we don’t like it then obviously we can move again, but I hope that it all works out.
3 and a half years in London in 2 different places a brief stay at my Nan’s while finding a place to live in Liverpool (lots of trips up and down to view places and work etc.), 2 years in Liverpool, then to Birmingham to live with my Nan (we weren’t sure how long we would live with her and had planned to find somewhere of our own to rent in Brum, but it’s too late now).
We shall see. We are starting to get a bit excited though.
I’m not looking forward to going through all our stuff and really cutting down on things, but there is a lot of stuff that we haven’t touched since moving.
There has been a lot of waiting, and though it has been frustrating I think the timing is better.
It’s been nice to see my Nan everyday and not worry about her, though it has been frustrating at times – which says more about me than her. It’s been good for her though, and it’s been good for B too. It’s been nice for my family to see more of B than they would have if we had stayed in Liverpool – especially due to Covid.
35 weeks pregnant with B comparison:
This is from a diptych, but the second image is quite booby.
I feel the same as I did when I wrote these hashtags – I am still quite nervous that I might not be be a mother of two soon.
I don’t feel like the best mother at times – especially at the moment as I have no energy – but I know I am not the worst and that I am doing my best (or maybe 90% of my best).
There haven’t been many lazy days in bed or much lying on the grass side by side… Hopefully in the coming years.
I am excited though, but I am feeling a bit nervous too.
My hypnobirthing notes are mainly about breathing and trying to be as relaxed as possible.
See, by this point I had washed all the baby clothes. I need to get on it and find things!
I think I have cared less about how I look with this pregnancy, but I also have not been going out to work and generally people just see me when I take B out and about. I’ve been stretching a lot, and I do get out for daily walks, and I think I am a bit kinder to my body now after birthing one kid.
My mental health has been better in ways during this pregnancy as we want two kids, and I felt a bit lost just living at my Nan’s and waiting for our move, so it made sense to have the second one now. The living situation has been frustrating at times though, and I do look forward to having our own place again – and I’m sure my Nan will like to feel more relaxed in her house again. I know we have been lucky with this situation, and my Nan has benefitted from it too, but we can’t all live like this forever.
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