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Pregnancy Waiting II

30 Weeks Feels Like A Big Milestone (30 Weeks / 24th November 2021)

Self-portrait where I am nude from my knees up. My left arm is covering my breasts, and my right hand is covering my pubic area. My bump is very visible.
30 Weeks Feels Like A Big Milestone (30 Weeks / 24th November 2021)
 
#WellIGuess30WeeksIsABigMilestoneAsTheDueDateIsCalculatedFor40Weeks
#SoThatMeansThePregnancyCouldBeThreeQuartersCompleteThoughYouAreAllowedUntil42WeeksIsh
#BWasBornLessThan8WeeksFromThisPointThoughSoWhoKnows
#IHaveToldMyParentsToBeOnAlertFrom37WeeksAndIWillStartGoingToBedEarlierAroundThen
#IWentToBedQuiteLateTheNightBeforeBWasBornAndWokeUpOnlyACoupleOfHoursLaterWithMyWatersBreaking
#ItIsEasyToSayIWillGoToBedEarlierButIDoNotAlwaysManageItAndTheOtherNightIDidButThenWasAwakeFromTwoToFour
#BHadWokenUpAroundTwoButSoonWentBackToSleepButICouldNotThoughLuckilySheSleptUntilSeven
#BAndMyParentsHadAGoodTimeAtTheWeekendWhichIsGoodAsTheyWillWatchHerWhileIAmInHospital
#SheWokeUpAtSixForThemWhichIWasRelievedAboutAsIWasWorriedSheWouldWakeUpAtFive
#WeDroppedHerOffAndWentForLunchThenCheckedIntoTheHotelWhereWeStayedUntilJustBeforeTheCheckoutTime
#WeHadANapAndWatchedTVAndIHadABathThoughIWouldHaveLikedToHaveReadAndSleptMoreButIGuessIWasExcitedAboutStayingUpLate
#AfterWeCheckedOutWeWentToHaveLunchAndDidFoodShoppingThenWentToPickUpB
#MyMumGotHerUpFromHerNapAndAtFirstSheWasJustClingingToMyMumButEventuallySheCameToSeeUs
#SheAteALotOfKidCrispsBeforeWeLeftAndFiveMinutesBeforeWeGotHomeSheWasSick
#AndIHaveNeverSeenSoMuchSickComeOutOfASmallHumansMouthBefore
#SheWentStraightIntoTheBathWhenWeGotHomeWhichSheWasHappyAboutAsSheLovesBathsAnyways
#WeTriedToGetAwayWithJustWipingTheCarSeatDownButYesterdayIHadToSolveTheCarSeatPuzzleAndPutAllThePiecesInTheWash
#IWasWorriedIWouldNotBeAbleToReassembleItButLuckilyIDid
#AfterTenMinutesOfBeingHomeItAlreadyFeltLikeWeHadNotHadAWeekendToOurselves
#WeDidMissBThoughAndAtOnePointWeWereWatchingVideosAndLookingAtPhotosOfHer
#IJustFeelSoTiredButBabyXIsSupposedToDoubleInSizeBetweenNowAndBirthSoIGuessIWillProbablyFeelMoreTired
#IFeelGuiltyAtTimesAsIDoNotHaveMuchEnergyAndIFeelLikeILetBDownABit
#IAmWorriedThatSheWatchesTooMuchTVAndSoITryToPutMusicOnInstead
#SheIsReallyIntoAFewShowsNowButIAmTryingToMakeSureWeReadBooksAndPlay
#IAmGladSheGoesToNurseryACoupleOfSessionsAWeekAsAtLeastIKnowSheIsGettingSomeStimulation
#IDoNotFeelReadyToBeAMotherOfTwoButAtTheSameTimeIJustWantTheBabyToArriveSoWeCanGetOnWithTheNextChapter
#IGuessWeAreOnACountdownNowThoughItIsABitFrustratingNotKnowingWhenTheClockWillRunOut
#BabyXFeelsQuiteActiveAndIAmStartingToGetMoreAcheyNowWithSlightBackPainAndHipPainEvenWithStretchingALot
#IHaveNotDoneAnyNudeShootsThisPregnancySoIGuessIWillDoOneToAccompanyTheseHashtagsAsAMemoryForMyself
#WeAreClosingTheKidBookAtTwoSoMyBodyWillNeverLookLikeThisAgainAfterBabyXIsBorn

#WellIGuess30WeeksIsABigMilestoneAsTheDueDateIsCalculatedFor40Weeks #SoThatMeansThePregnancyCouldBeThreeQuartersCompleteThoughYouAreAllowedUntil42WeeksIsh

I wasn’t sure on what word to use. Complete makes it sound like a video game or something, but I guess that’s what it is.

#BWasBornLessThan8WeeksFromThisPointThoughSoWhoKnows

I was sure that I’d be a 42-weeker, but no. Maybe this time? I hope not though.

#IHaveToldMyParentsToBeOnAlertFrom37WeeksAndIWillStartGoingToBedEarlierAroundThen

Baby X will probably come at 36 weeks now just to surprise me.

#IWentToBedQuiteLateTheNightBeforeBWasBornAndWokeUpOnlyACoupleOfHoursLaterWithMyWatersBreaking

I got through it as I wasn’t tired from running around after a toddler (I nearly wrote teenager?), but I think this time I will be too tired for the same series of events, but I guess adrenaline and whatever kicks in?

#ItIsEasyToSayIWillGoToBedEarlierButIDoNotAlwaysManageItAndTheOtherNightIDidButThenWasAwakeFromTwoToFour

Hello again pregnancy insomnia.

#BHadWokenUpAroundTwoButSoonWentBackToSleepButICouldNotThoughLuckilySheSleptUntilSeven

I was faffing around reading the news and stuff, but I think that just makes my brain more alert. I started to read my book and before long I felt sleepy again. I usually read a book every night until my eyes start to close, or I have to tell myself to go to sleep.

I am currently reading Men Who Hate Women by Laura Bates. It’s interesting, but sad/frustrating/a bit of a downer. I swear I’ll pick up my hypnobirthing book soon…

#BAndMyParentsHadAGoodTimeAtTheWeekendWhichIsGoodAsTheyWillWatchHerWhileIAmInHospital

Well, that’s the plan anyways. Let’s see. I don’t want to be calling them at 1 in the morning…

#SheWokeUpAtSixForThemWhichIWasRelievedAboutAsIWasWorriedSheWouldWakeUpAtFive

Phew.

#WeDroppedHerOffAndWentForLunchThenCheckedIntoTheHotelWhereWeStayedUntilJustBeforeTheCheckoutTime

We went for lunch at our favourite Indian restaurant and it did not disappoint. I have missed their chili paneer. Whenever we order Indian food I always get chili paneer and it is never as good.

We bought snacks at a supermarket before we got to the hotel and we barely touched them as we were so full from lunch.

#WeHadANapAndWatchedTVAndIHadABathThoughIWouldHaveLikedToHaveReadAndSleptMoreButIGuessIWasExcitedAboutStayingUpLate

I did also play The Sims. I do play it once in a while as it’s good when I’m feeling quite stressed/tired. I have phases of playing it once or twice a year. I remember seeing an ad for the first one on the back of a different game I bought and saved up for it until it came out. We have a long history together…

Anyways, I ended up staying up until midnight watching reruns of Gogglebox and then slept until 7. Was a bit disappointed as I did want to sleep until checkout, but I’m not used to sleeping in anymore.

#AfterWeCheckedOutWeWentToHaveLunchAndDidFoodShoppingThenWentToPickUpB

We shared a pizza between us as we were quite full. Exciting stuff.

#MyMumGotHerUpFromHerNapAndAtFirstSheWasJustClingingToMyMumButEventuallySheCameToSeeUs

She was nuzzling into my Mum and then would sneak a peek at us with a smile, then she came over. We knew she was just waking up and wasn’t in a mood with us or anything. My parents said the weekend went better than they thought so that’s nice.

#SheAteALotOfKidCrispsBeforeWeLeftAndFiveMinutesBeforeWeGotHomeSheWasSick

I’d got her some new crisps to try. I usually just give her a few, but as we weren’t at home I thought she could just eat them from the bag, but that was obviously a mistake.

#AndIHaveNeverSeenSoMuchSickComeOutOfASmallHumansMouthBefore

Luckily my morning sickness had passed, otherwise I probably would have been sick too.

#SheWentStraightIntoTheBathWhenWeGotHomeWhichSheWasHappyAboutAsSheLovesBathsAnyways

So she got a longer play than she might do normally. We were going to give her a bath before bed anyways, so it saved us doing it later.

#WeTriedToGetAwayWithJustWipingTheCarSeatDownButYesterdayIHadToSolveTheCarSeatPuzzleAndPutAllThePiecesInTheWash

It took me a good while to take all the pieces out. Tiago said the seat didn’t smell, but the night before we had gone to the supermarket and the car stank of sick.

#IWasWorriedIWouldNotBeAbleToReassembleItButLuckilyIDid

I should have taken pictures of it being dismantled really. I was proud of myself for sorting it out.

#AfterTenMinutesOfBeingHomeItAlreadyFeltLikeWeHadNotHadAWeekendToOurselves

I guess I didn’t have a nap as well (I usually nap when B naps) so that made me feel really tired too.

#WeDidMissBThoughAndAtOnePointWeWereWatchingVideosAndLookingAtPhotosOfHer

We do that a lot. We did it last night too… She’s funny.

#IJustFeelSoTiredButBabyXIsSupposedToDoubleInSizeBetweenNowAndBirthSoIGuessIWillProbablyFeelMoreTired

Apparently I only need to eat 200 more calories a day than before I was pregnant, but I have no idea what 200 calories is and the baby takes most of the nutrients out of what I eat and I get the leftovers. Charming.

#IFeelGuiltyAtTimesAsIDoNotHaveMuchEnergyAndIFeelLikeILetBDownABit

Oh, Mum guilt.

#IAmWorriedThatSheWatchesTooMuchTVAndSoITryToPutMusicOnInstead

If my Nan is up when we get up then we usually watch more. Luckily after a while B gets bored of watching the TV. I do try to take her out for a walk or two a day, but we need to find more things to do really.

#SheIsReallyIntoAFewShowsNowButIAmTryingToMakeSureWeReadBooksAndPlay

She likes to dance to theme tunes and she really likes In The Night Garden. This morning she was saying ‘Gaga’ and pointing at the TV.

#IAmGladSheGoesToNurseryACoupleOfSessionsAWeekAsAtLeastIKnowSheIsGettingSomeStimulation

It’s good for her. Tiago says she doesn’t cry or anything when he drops her off now. She’s settled in quick, but I said why would she want to spend all day with her boring, tired pregnant mother when she can see kids her own age and play with different toys etc.

#IDoNotFeelReadyToBeAMotherOfTwoButAtTheSameTimeIJustWantTheBabyToArriveSoWeCanGetOnWithTheNextChapter

I just keep wondering how it will be, but I just want to get on with it. I am feeling tired though, so I am nervous and should probably enjoy the few hours to myself that I get while B is at nursery and I have no mothering responsibilities while I can.

#IGuessWeAreOnACountdownNowThoughItIsABitFrustratingNotKnowingWhenTheClockWillRunOut

That is what makes me nervous. I just need to get prepared…

#BabyXFeelsQuiteActiveAndIAmStartingToGetMoreAcheyNowWithSlightBackPainAndHipPainEvenWithStretchingALot

I can feel the pain in bed a bit now. I guess baby is getting bigger and my body is trying to keep up. I have a lot of cramps and pains. All fun stuff.

#IHaveNotDoneAnyNudeShootsThisPregnancySoIGuessIWillDoOneToAccompanyTheseHashtagsAsAMemoryForMyself

I did a few when I was pregnant with B. I think I’ve said before that baby X will say ‘Mum, why did you take no nudes with me?’ In reality I’m sure they will both say ‘Mum, why did you take nudes when you were pregnant with us?’ I do wonder what they will think about my work when they’re older. They’ll probably just say ‘Mum, you look so old now’.

#WeAreClosingTheKidBookAtTwoSoMyBodyWillNeverLookLikeThisAgainAfterBabyXIsBorn

I say that, but so many people have told me that their third was an accident. I really don’t want to go through pregnancy again though. The sickness, the tiredness etc. Two seems like a good number. I have two arms. One to grab each kid with. One to replace Tiago, one to replace me. I think I will be stretching myself too much as a mother to more.

30 weeks pregnant with B comparison:

Self-portrait sitting on a sofa, holding my arms up over my head. T is resting his hand on my bump.
We Could Be Parents In 3 Months Or Less (30 weeks)
 
#ISayCouldBecauseIKnowItIsNot100PercentDefinite
#ThoughObviouslyIHopeItHappens
#YouWouldHaveThoughtByNowThatIWouldHaveComeToTermsWithTheFactWeHaveABabyComing
#ButItStillFeelsSurreal
#ThatIAmGrowingSomethingInsideMeThatLooksLikeAMixOfMeAndTiago
#ItReallyIsBizarre
#MyBumpGetsBiggerEveryWeek
#AndTheKicksGotStronger
#ItFeelsMoreActiveInTheEvening
#WhoWouldHaveThoughtThatIWouldBeHeavilyPregnantDuringAPandemic
#ItIsAlsoOddThatIWillNotSeeMyPregnantFriendsPregnantInRealLife
#WeAreOrderingMoreStuffNowAsIDoubtTheShopsWillReopenBeforeIGiveBirth
#AndIfTheyDoThenTheLastPlaceIWantToBeIsSomewhereWithLotsOfRandomPeople
#SomeHatsAndSocksCameInThePostYesterday
#TheyWereSmallerThanIThoughtTheyWouldBe
#ISaidToTiagoThatItIsWeirdThatTheBabyWillBeSoSmall
#HeSaidHeHopesForABigBaby
#ISaidDoNotWishTooMuchAsYouAreNotTheOneWhoHasToPushItOut
#HeSaidTrue
#IPlannedToDoSomethingDifferentWithTheShootToday
#ButTiagoWasFinishingSomethingOnHisComputer
#AndIHadSetUpMyStuff
#SoIJustAskedHimToPutHisHandOnMyBelly
#AndThenIJustMessedAboutWaitingForHim
#ByTheTimeHeWasDoneISaidWeCanTryTheIdeaAnotherTimeAsIThinkIHaveAPicture
#IAskedTiagoIfHeWantedToAddToTheHashtags
#HeShookHisHeadAndSaidHeLooksForwardToTheBabyComing
#HeWantsToKnowTheGenderOfTheBabyBeforeTheBirthButIDoNot
#IRealisedTheOtherDayThatIfIHaveScansHeWillNotBeAllowedInTheRoomOrEvenTheBuilding
#IDoNotSeeThePointOfFindingOutNowAsIWantToBeSurprised

Well, it seems like I felt similar at 30 weeks last time. I am still anxious that I might not become a mother of two, but I am trying to remain calm.

#WhoWouldHaveThoughtThatIWouldBeHeavilyPregnantDuringAPandemic

Who would have thought that I would be this pregnant again during the same pandemic?

#ItIsAlsoOddThatIWillNotSeeMyPregnantFriendsPregnantInRealLife

I had a zoom call with a few of our Liverpool friends the other night who were pregnant at the same time. They said to show them my bump and we talked about how it was weird that we never saw each other pregnant in real life last time. Sadly, they might not see me pregnant in real life this time as well just as I doubt we will get to see them before X is born.

#HeSaidHeHopesForABigBaby

I had forgotten that he said this. B was small. X is meant to be bigger…

#HeWantsToKnowTheGenderOfTheBabyBeforeTheBirthButIDoNot

Well, in the end we didn’t find out and like I’ve said before I’m skeptical that X is a girl. I know that people get it wrong so I’m holding my breath.

Self-portrait with Tiago from our necks to our waists. We are wearing the same top and T is facing the camera, whereas I am stood side on to the camera with my bump touching T's arm.
Who Knows How Things Will Be By The Time I Give Birth (30 weeks)
 
#IKeepTellingMyselfThatIShouldRestMore
#ButIWokeUpTodayFeelingLikeIWantedToDoAShoot
#ThisWasNotTheIdeaIHadYesterdayThatIDidNotEndUpDoing
#IRealiseThatAFewOfTheLastPicturesAllHaveAHandOrHandsOnMyBump
#IWasLookingAtThePictureOfMeAndTiagoWhenIWas19WeeksPregnantAndYouCanBarelySeeMyBump
#SoIThoughtItWouldBeNiceToRedoItWithMyBumpMoreObvious
#WeKindOfLookLikeWeirdMannequins
#WeOrderedOurPushchairAndCotToday
#ItHasBeenStressingMeOutForACoupleOfWeeksDecidingOnWhichOnesToBuy
#SoWeJustTookThePlungeTodayAsWhatIsTheWorstThatCanHappen
#ItIsSoWeirdMakingWhatFeelsLikeBigPurchasesWithoutHavingSeenThemInRealLifeOrHavingTriedThemOutFirst
#ApparentlyIfTheBabyCameNowItWouldHaveAGoodChanceOfSurviving
#SoItMadeSenseToOrderThem
#JustNeedToBuySomeSmallerThingsNowLikeMattressProtectorsAndNappies
#IAmLookingForwardToHavingItAllSorted
#ItIsNiceThatTiagoIsInTheProjectABitMoreNow
#ItIsGoingToBeWeirdWhenWeAreNotAtHomeTogetherSoMuch
#IThinkOnceTheBabyHisBornHisWorkNoLongerConsidersMeToBeVulnerable
#SoHeWillNeedToLeaveTheHouseForWorkAgain
#ButSurelyANewbornIsVulnerable
#IDoNotKnow
#WhoKnowsHowThingsWillBeByTheTimeIGiveBirth
#ItFeelsWeirdBuyingAPushchairKnowingThatItWillProbablyBeUsedForJustMyUsualSimpleWalkForALongTime
#AndMaybeIWillPreferToJustHaveTheBabyInACarrierForAWhileToAvoidAwkwardPavementEncounters
#IGuessItIsGoodToCoverAllTheOptionsAsThePushchairWillBeUsedAtSomePoint
#IHadALieDownThisAfternoonAndIThinkTheBabyWasUsingMyBladderAsATrampoline
#IThoughtIWasGoingToWetMyself
#WentOutForOurUsualWalkEarlier
#AGuyStuckHisHeadOutOfTheWindowOfAVanThatDroveFromBehindUsAndLetOutABloodCurdlingScreamAndIJumped
#HeHadHisHeadOutOfTheWindowSoIHopedHeNoticedIWasPregnantAndThenFeldBadButIAmSureHeWasJustHappyThatHeHadShowedOffInFrontOfWhoeverWasDriving

I keep telling myself that the baby will not come until at least the time B did, but in the back of my head I know the baby could come at anytime.

This time I have already bought nappies, but we need to think about cot options. We might just use the one that my parents have at their house (for B’s stays etc.)

Tiago has been in the project less this time, though hopefully this weekend we will do a family shoot.

This time things are meant to be a bit ‘better’ with visiting at hospitals, but I’m not going to keep looking at it as I know things can and probably will change before X is born. Better not to get my hopes up, but hopefully this time we will be home quicker.

I didn’t like using the pushchair for a while as I felt so self-conscious using it. It can adapt to have two kids in/on it, but we’ll see how it goes. I need to have a go at putting the bassinet and a seat on it.

I do worry about being far away from a toilet when we are out at times as I do feel like my bladder is smaller, but I think the kegels definitely help.


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