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Pregnancy Waiting II

Imitating B Looking At The Ceiling (8 Weeks? / 23rd June 2021)

Self-portrait on the floor. My elbows and arms are supporting me and I'm looking up to the ceiling.
Failing At Imitating How B Looks At The Ceiling (8 Weeks? / 23rd June 2021)
 
#SometimesBLeansBackAtStaresAtTheCeilingWhileInHerHighchair
#AtOneOfHerBabyClassesSheWillJustLeanBackAndLookAtTimes
#ThoughThereIsADiscoBallHangingDownButIAmNotSureIfSheHasActuallyNoticedIt
#SheHasHerThirdToothComingThroughWhichIsHerFirstInHerTopGum
#SheIsGettingMoreConfidentWithTakingStepsAndItWillNotBeLongBeforeSheIsReallyWalking
#WeNeedToGetHerSomeProperShoes
#WeHaveResignedOurselvesToTheFactThatSheJustWakesUpAtFiveFortyEveryDayNow
#IOnlyNoticedTheOtherDayHowItIsSoLightSoLateAtNightButNowItWillStartToGoTheOtherWay
#IWonderWhenOrIfSheWillStartToSleepInABitLater
#IAttendedAnOnlineClassAboutFeedingToddlersSoIKnowABitMoreNowAboutWhatSheNeedsToEatAtEveryMeal
#CookingIsDifficultAtTheMomentAsIGenerallyFeelSickWhenDoingItButINeedToPullMyWeightMore
#IHaveStartedToBeSickMoreRegularlySinceMyLastEntry
#YesterdayIHadTheDentalHygienistAndIWasReallyWorriedThatIWouldBeSickAtMyAppointment
#IWasGettingReadyAndWasAboutToBrushMyTeethWhenIWasSick
#BetterThatItWasBeforeThanDuringButIWasWorriedThatISmelledOfSick
#IWasRelievedToWalkIntoTheAppointmentAndSeeItWasTwoWomen
#IFeltLessAwkwardAboutSayingSorryIShouldWarnYouButIHaveBadMorningSickness
#IHadThoughtAboutCancellingTheAppointmentButIReadThatDentalHygieneIsReallyImportantWhenYouArePregnant
#IFeelLikeIShouldBeMorePregnantThanEightWeeksByNowAndMaybeIAmOrMaybeIAmNot
#IAmYetToHearAnythingAboutAnAppointmentSoIJustHaveToWaitAndSee
#IHaveBeenGettingTheChillsALotLatelyWhichIDoNotRememberHavingWithB
#IResearchedAboutItAndApparentlyItIsCommonAsYourHormonesAreAllOverThePlace
#MyNanLikesToPutTheHeatingOnHighSoTheChangeInTemperatureProbablyDoesNotHelp
#WeHaveStartedToSeeMorePeopleLatelyWhichIsReallyNice
#AFriendCameToSpendTheDayAndItWasReliefAsTheWeekDaysAreSoLong
#WeWillSpendTheWeekendWithSomeFriendsAndTheirKidsThisWeekendSoIAmLookingForwardToThat
#ItIsWeirdHowBIsOneAndSheIsStillYetToMeetSoManyPeople
#IHopeThatSheWillMeetMorePeopleBeforeSheHasASiblingSoSheDoesNotHaveToShareTheAttentionButItIsWhatItIs
#IWasThinkingThisMorningThatItIsWeirdThatWeMayHaveAnotherChildInSevenMonthsTime
#IKnowIAmPregnantAndWhatThatMeansButIStillDoNotReallyEquateItWithUsBeingAFamilyOfFourYet

(30th August 2021: I failed as being pregnant I couldn’t completely replicate how she does it. It’s more leaning back from a seated position, but I thought I better be careful. It was a hot day, so I wore less than I originally intended to.)

#SometimesBLeansBackAtStaresAtTheCeilingWhileInHerHighchair

I made a note of this in my ‘pictures to take’ memo 3 weeks ago.

#AtOneOfHerBabyClassesSheWillJustLeanBackAndLookAtTimes

She did it at the last class.

#ThoughThereIsADiscoBallHangingDownButIAmNotSureIfSheHasActuallyNoticedIt

I like to try to see what she is looking at. At my Nan’s house she does have some nice patterns in the paint on the ceiling, but I guess she is just taking in all of her environment.

#SheHasHerThirdToothComingThroughWhichIsHerFirstInHerTopGum

I thought I saw something a few days ago but thought it was just saliva, but then I realised the day after that it was the start of a tooth.

#SheIsGettingMoreConfidentWithTakingStepsAndItWillNotBeLongBeforeSheIsReallyWalking

I wrote the hashtags while B played with her toys, which is the first time I’ve wrote and she’s played. As I was thinking what to write B walked from the table to an activity table that my Nan got for her.

#WeNeedToGetHerSomeProperShoes

We have some shoes, but I can not even get them on her feet. Last time I did they cut her heel a bit, so yeah she needs shoes. I need to find somewhere to get her measured…

#WeHaveResignedOurselvesToTheFactThatSheJustWakesUpAtFiveFortyEveryDayNow

The other night it was 11pm and I was struggling to sleep. I knew I would regret it, but actually yesterday I didn’t have a nap and felt okay. I went to nap during her first nap, but she woke up as soon as I pulled my eye mask on and lay my head down (I had been doing some work first).

I am writing this blog post while B is having a nap. I don’t feel particularly tired, but I will at least lie down and have a rest.

#IOnlyNoticedTheOtherDayHowItIsSoLightSoLateAtNightButNowItWillStartToGoTheOtherWay

It was the 20th June and I was like ‘ooh it’s 10pm and it’s still light! Oh yeah tomorrow is the longest day of the year…’

#IWonderWhenOrIfSheWillStartToSleepInABitLater

I think we have to keep acting like she will never sleep in late again so we don’t go to bed too late. At the moment T and I are having a nice chat before we go to sleep, which sounds basic but we didn’t have time for it for a while. It’s important.

#IAttendedAnOnlineClassAboutFeedingToddlersSoIKnowABitMoreNowAboutWhatSheNeedsToEatAtEveryMeal

Carbs at every meal/snack. More energy dense foods. Okay.

#CookingIsDifficultAtTheMomentAsIGenerallyFeelSickWhenDoingItButINeedToPullMyWeightMore

I managed to make a mushroom and leek pie while B crawled around me yesterday. Though T helped with the puff pastry, but it felt good to contribute as I have been so rubbish lately.

#IHaveStartedToBeSickMoreRegularlySinceMyLastEntry

I was sick after finishing my last post.

#YesterdayIHadTheDentalHygienistAndIWasReallyWorriedThatIWouldBeSickAtMyAppointment

I was really anxious about it.

#IWasGettingReadyAndWasAboutToBrushMyTeethWhenIWasSick

I was a bit relieved.

#BetterThatItWasBeforeThanDuringButIWasWorriedThatISmelledOfSick

I arrived just on time, though someone beat me to reception so it seemed like I was late. I had been trying to make sure I didn’t smell of sick.

#IWasRelievedToWalkIntoTheAppointmentAndSeeItWasTwoWomen #IFeltLessAwkwardAboutSayingSorryIShouldWarnYouButIHaveBadMorningSickness

If there had been two guys I would have said it, but I would have felt more awkward for sure.

#IHadThoughtAboutCancellingTheAppointmentButIReadThatDentalHygieneIsReallyImportantWhenYouArePregnant

Your gums bleed more, which might be why when I went to have a tooth out my gums might have been bleeding a lot when they were checking me over beforehand. I had that tooth removed as ibruprofen was the only thing that helped and I knew that you’re not really supposed to take ibruprofen when you’re pregnant. I didn’t want the pain to get worse and then have a tooth out when I was possibly heavily pregnant. It was a good job that I had it out when I did.

#IFeelLikeIShouldBeMorePregnantThanEightWeeksByNowAndMaybeIAmOrMaybeIAmNot

Time moves in weird ways. Sometimes I look quite pregnant, but it’s more of a food baby I think.

#IAmYetToHearAnythingAboutAnAppointmentSoIJustHaveToWaitAndSee

I did miss a call from a mobile number last week. They never left a message though so it probably was just spam.

#IHaveBeenGettingTheChillsALotLatelyWhichIDoNotRememberHavingWithB

I’ll go really cold. Put my jacket on. Then I’m hot in a few minutes.

#IResearchedAboutItAndApparentlyItIsCommonAsYourHormonesAreAllOverThePlace

Great.

#MyNanLikesToPutTheHeatingOnHighSoTheChangeInTemperatureProbablyDoesNotHelp

Heating on maximum. Turn it down. Sun comes out. Etc etc.

#WeHaveStartedToSeeMorePeopleLatelyWhichIsReallyNice

After so long without seeing many people at all.

#AFriendCameToSpendTheDayAndItWasReliefAsTheWeekDaysAreSoLong

It was so nice to hang out and have someone else giving B attention. We all had a nap when B had her second nap. I was glad that she didn’t mind me going off to sleep and she said she fell asleep too.

#WeWillSpendTheWeekendWithSomeFriendsAndTheirKidsThisWeekendSoIAmLookingForwardToThat

We went away with them a few years ago and we were the only couple who did not have kids. There were 4 kids then and now there are 7. If this pregnancy goes well then we will all have 2 kids each.

#ItIsWeirdHowBIsOneAndSheIsStillYetToMeetSoManyPeople

*Shrug* What can we do?

#IHopeThatSheWillMeetMorePeopleBeforeSheHasASiblingSoSheDoesNotHaveToShareTheAttentionButItIsWhatItIs

I know a lot of people will not see me until I potentially have two kids and that might be weird for them to see. I keep saying potentially as I am still nervous about things as it is early days. Morning sickness is meant to be a good sign, but it is never concrete.

#IWasThinkingThisMorningThatItIsWeirdThatWeMayHaveAnotherChildInSevenMonthsTime #IKnowIAmPregnantAndWhatThatMeansButIStillDoNotReallyEquateItWithUsBeingAFamilyOfFourYet

I guess things will be more real when we have a scan or an appointment. At the moment I am finding it hard to get my head around, I think so much of my time is focused on B that in ways I probably do not think about it all as much as when I was pregnant with her.

Fingers crossed for it all. Time to have a lie down. I’m feeling sleepier now…

8 weeks pregnant with B comparison:

Self-portrait. Sat in bed with the bedsheet and duvet pulled up around me, and holding my hands to my elbows. I'm looking straight at the camera and look a bit tired.
I Worry That People Will Think I Am Drunk Or Hungover If I Am Sick In The Street (8 Weeks)

#8Weeks
#ThatMeansIHaveKnownForNearly4WeeksNow
#ItIsSoWeird
#IThinkIAmGettingALittleLessFreakedOutNow
#ThoughCrampsAndStuffOccasionallyDoMakeMeWinceAndWorry
#ThenIRememberHowOftenIHaveExperiencedThem
#TheSicknessThingIsAlreadyGettingOld
#IHaveBeenFeelingMoreSickInTheEvenings
#IDoNotMindBeingSickInTheMorningSoMuchAsIHaveNotEatenYetAndNowIJustTryToDrinkWaterBeforeEightThirty
#OnceIAmSickInTheMorningIFeelFineAndNowItIsBecomingWeirdlyReassuring
#LikeOkayIMustStillBePregnantAsMyBodyIsDoingThatSickThing
#IJustDoNotWantToGetCaughtOutAndBeSickOutsideOfOurFlat
#IWorryThatPeopleWillThinkIAmDrunkOrHungoverIfIAmSickInTheStreet
#BeingSickOnATrainIsMyMainWorry
#IBoughtSomeProperSickBagsYesterday
#ButINeedToJustCarryOneAroundWithMe
#LikeAReallyCoolKid
#RegisteredForTheDentistToday
#TheyWereLikeDoYouPay
#ISaidIUsuallyDoButIAmPregnantAtTheMoment
#AtTheMomentSeemsToBeSomethingThatISayALot
#IAmStillCautious
#IToldOneMorePersonThisWeekThatIAmPregnant
#BecauseIFeltSoSickAndWeWereGoingToMeetTiagoAndHisFriendAndIThoughtTiagosFriendWouldSayCongratsWhenHeSawMeWhichHeDid
#IUnderstandTheNotTellingLotsOfPeopleButIfItIsToProtectMeThenItIsMoreAwkwardNotTalkingAboutThingsThanTalkingAboutThem
#AwkwardAsInKeepingSecretsAndKeepingThoughtsBackFromPeople
#TalkingToPeopleSayingThatIAmMakingWorkAboutTryingToGetPregnant
#WhichIWasDoingButNowIAmPregnantSoICanNotBeTrueAboutWhatIAmWorkingOnAtTheMoment
#IAmSeeingSomeFriendsNextWeekSoIAmGuessingIWillTellThemThenAsOtherwiseIMightNotSeeThemFaceToFaceAgainForAWhileAndSeeingPeoplesReactionsIsMostOfTheFun 
#WhenWeWereEngagedIOnlyToldPeopleFaceToFaceBeforeWeActuallyGotMarried

I am 8 weeks pregnant in the new image, though it hadn’t been confirmed yet. Cramps still make me worry. With B I was usually sick more in the mornings, but with baby X I was sick more in the evenings. I was never actually sick in public with B, but I was sick in front of people last week, which wasn’t very nice…

This time I wasn’t really travelling about because of B and Covid (I’ve only been on a train two or three times for short journeys since she was born), so I’ve hopefully missed that phase this time.

I also told more people via messages that I was pregnant this time before I announced it as I knew I would not see many people in person before hand.

But morning sickness is and was HORRIBLE. Some things don’t change…


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Oh Me, Oh Pai Pregnancy Waiting II

Tiago’s Second British Father’s Day (7 Weeks? / 20th June 2021)

Tiago sat on a beanbag with B on his lap. He is looking down at her, while her face has been covered with duplicates of Tiago's thumb.
Tiago’s Second British Father’s Day (7 Weeks? / 20th June 2021)
 
#IAskedTiagoAboutHowHeFeelsAboutBeingADadTheseDaysAndHeJustSaidGood
#AfterSomeMoreDiggingHeSaidThatHeNowUnderstandsHisPlaceInTheWorldAsAHumanMore
#IGuessBWillNotBeAsStillForTheShootAsSheWasAYearAgo
#SheWasBarelyAWeekOldWhenItWasTiagosFirstFathersDay
#NowSheIsJustOnTheMoveSoMuchAndSheIsStartingToTakeMultipleSteps
#TheOtherDaySheDidAboutSixAsSheConcentratedOnMyPhoneAsIMovedIt
#YesterdaySheWalkedFromTheKitchenIntoTheLivingRoomWithoutAnyPrompt
#TheOtherDayInHerBabyClassThereWereSomeBigFakeDogsThatTheTeachersBroughtRound
#BRanOffAndSheWouldNotTouchAnyOfTheOtherToys
#SheIsTheOldestByFarNowAndSoonSheWillSoonBeTooOldForTheClass
#SheWasRandomlyHuggingTheWomanNextToUsWhoWeHadNotSpokenTo
#HerSleepHasGotWorseButICheckedAndSheIsGoingThroughALeap
#SheAlsoHadHerOneYearVaccinationsThisWeek
#IWasSayingToSomeoneThatAtLeastThereAreNotSevenJabsButThereWereFour
#TwoInEachLegAndIFeltSoBadForBWhoWasObviouslyUpset
#TheNurseWasSayingThereUsedToBeThreeAt12MonthsThenOneOneMonthLater
#ButPeopleWereJustNotTurningUpForTheSecondAppointmentOrTheKidsWouldRememberTheNeedleAndBeScared
#YesterdayBWasAwakeLoadsDuringTheNightButPrettyMuchAwakeFromFourThirty
#SheAteAllHerBreakfastAtSixSoSheMustHaveBeenHungry
#IStillFeelABitThrownOffFromUsChangingFromFormulaToMilkButTheMainDifferenceWasIDidNotGiveHerYoghurtForDessertTheNightBefore
#SheUsuallyEatsQuiteABitOfItAndIGuessItHelpsFillHerUp
#TodaySheWokeUpAtTheSameTimeButIPutTheHeatingOnAndSheSleptABitMore
#WeHaveJustKindOfAcceptedThatWeWillBeAwakeFromFiveThirtyEverydayNow
#IHaveBeenSoTiredThatIHaveBeenAsleepByTenTheLastCoupleOfNights
#MySicknessComesAndGoesAndIHaveOnlyBeenActuallySickTwoTimes
#TwoOtherTimesIWentToBeSickButNothingCameUp
#IHaveBeenEatingALotOfCheeseAndTomatoSandwiches
#TheOtherNightIHadAReallyStrongCravingForRiceAndMangoChutney
#IFeelABitNervousAboutItAllButHopefullyEverythingWillBeOkay
#IDoNotThinkThereWillEverBeAGoodTimeToHaveASecondKidSoWeWillJustHaveToDoOurBest

#IAskedTiagoAboutHowHeFeelsAboutBeingADadTheseDaysAndHeJustSaidGood

This is why I’ve stopped asking him for comments for these things.

#AfterSomeMoreDiggingHeSaidThatHeNowUnderstandsHisPlaceInTheWorldAsAHumanMore

As the shoot is about his second Father’s Day I thought I needed to at least get something else out of him.

He’s a great Dad. It’s currently 06:38 and he’s up sorting out B’s breakfast, while I’m writing this. I did start writing before 6am but B went back to sleep for 10 minutes…

#IGuessBWillNotBeAsStillForTheShootAsSheWasAYearAgo #SheWasBarelyAWeekOldWhenItWasTiagosFirstFathersDay

Oh, what a year.

#NowSheIsJustOnTheMoveSoMuchAndSheIsStartingToTakeMultipleSteps

She.Does.Not.Sit.Still. A friend came to visit yesterday and we were sat outside with her just pushing her walker up and down.

#TheOtherDaySheDidAboutSixAsSheConcentratedOnMyPhoneAsIMovedIt

She was stood up and she was looking at my phone, so I just held it at her grabbing height and kept moving it. We were sat behind the sofa so Nan and T missed it.

#YesterdaySheWalkedFromTheKitchenIntoTheLivingRoomWithoutAnyPrompt

I was glad that Nan and Tiago saw it. Both times were early evening-ish, so her legs must have enough strength by then.

#TheOtherDayInHerBabyClassThereWereSomeBigFakeDogsThatTheTeachersBroughtRound #BRanOffAndSheWouldNotTouchAnyOfTheOtherToys

I was shocked as I thought she would have grabbed them. I guess she is getting older and some safety defences are kicking in? The teachers were saying some kids just don’t like cuddly toys, but I was surprised. I think she was having a weird day as at home she wouldn’t go near her toys either.

#SheIsTheOldestByFarNowAndSoonSheWillSoonBeTooOldForTheClass

There was a baby I hadn’t noticed before who was starting to crawl, but it was their last week. It’s just B and a lot of kids half her age. She enjoys it though – besides being scared of stuffed animals.

#SheWasRandomlyHuggingTheWomanNextToUsWhoWeHadNotSpokenTo

She did keep looking at the woman’s baby, but then she just crawled off, gave her a hug, then tried to go in her handbag. Classic.

#HerSleepHasGotWorseButICheckedAndSheIsGoingThroughALeap

Great.

#SheAlsoHadHerOneYearVaccinationsThisWeek

Great great.

#IWasSayingToSomeoneThatAtLeastThereAreNotSevenJabsButThereWereFour

I thought it would be one injection for some reason.

#TwoInEachLegAndIFeltSoBadForBWhoWasObviouslyUpset

I had to try to hold her still. Her legs are a mess at the moment. She obviously tried to escape my grasp 🙁

A woman outside was saying she has twins and one watched the other one have their injections and he was off.

#TheNurseWasSayingThereUsedToBeThreeAt12MonthsThenOneOneMonthLater #ButPeopleWereJustNotTurningUpForTheSecondAppointmentOrTheKidsWouldRememberTheNeedleAndBeScared

I guess they didn’t want to overload them, but it’s easier just to get them all done on the same day. Good job my Mum comes round to visit as I think B is fine, but she says to give B paracetamol as she has a bit of a temperature. I don’t even notice so I feel bad.

#YesterdayBWasAwakeLoadsDuringTheNightButPrettyMuchAwakeFromFourThirty

Oh the joys. I tried putting the heating on but that didn’t work much.

#SheAteAllHerBreakfastAtSixSoSheMustHaveBeenHungry #IStillFeelABitThrownOffFromUsChangingFromFormulaToMilkButTheMainDifferenceWasIDidNotGiveHerYoghurtForDessertTheNightBefore #SheUsuallyEatsQuiteABitOfItAndIGuessItHelpsFillHerUp

I really need to look at her meals and change things up a bit. She does seem to be getting into her milk though, but it’s always a bit weird changing from one schedule to another. Soon it will be normal. I think her sleep isn’t helped by the leap and vaccinations…

#TodaySheWokeUpAtTheSameTimeButIPutTheHeatingOnAndSheSleptABitMore

Then she was awake from 5:30, but I went in and told her to go back to sleep. We need to be more strict with only getting her out of bed at 6. Sometimes we cave at 10 to 6. Today we were being strict and she actually fell asleep from 5:55 to 6:05. I had got my laptop out to start writing, but when she went quiet I quickly lay down again.

#WeHaveJustKindOfAcceptedThatWeWillBeAwakeFromFiveThirtyEverydayNow

Even if we don’t get her up until 6 she will be awake.

#IHaveBeenSoTiredThatIHaveBeenAsleepByTenTheLastCoupleOfNights

I seem to wake up around 4 by myself and feel quite awake, but I always want more sleep. If B gets up at 6 then we try to get her to nap from 9 to 11. Sometimes she sleeps all of it, sometimes she doesn’t. I will usually nap for most of it if I do not have much on.

#MySicknessComesAndGoesAndIHaveOnlyBeenActuallySickTwoTimes

Hurrah. I don’t want it to get worse. It’s bad enough as it is.

#TwoOtherTimesIWentToBeSickButNothingCameUp

I was relieved. I didn’t like feeling sick, so I wanted to feel better but I didn’t want to actually be sick. I gagged a couple of times and felt better. Great.

#IHaveBeenEatingALotOfCheeseAndTomatoSandwiches

Toast. Butter. Cheddar. A couple of cherry tomatoes. It seems to be enough to take the sickness away and to leave me feeling happy.

#TheOtherNightIHadAReallyStrongCravingForRiceAndMangoChutney

I don’t really like rice so that was fun/weird.

#IFeelABitNervousAboutItAllButHopefullyEverythingWillBeOkay

Last night I was going from hot to cold lots. I probably had sat outside for too long on a not very warm day.

#IDoNotThinkThereWillEverBeAGoodTimeToHaveASecondKidSoWeWillJustHaveToDoOurBest

I do worry about it, but I would rather have a second one now than leave it a few years. All we can do is our best and I’m sure it’ll all be okay.

Feeling sick now.

And then I was sick 10 minutes later…

7 weeks pregnant with B comparison:

Self-portrait with a piece of tissue wrapped around my finger.
(Dragon Fruit &) Cut To Finger (7 and a half weeks)
 
#SoInMyUlteriorMonologueProjectThereIsAPictureOfMyHandsHoldingADragonFruitWithABloodyFinger
#TheReasonWhyUlteriorMonologueIsCalledThatIsBecauseIWroteHashtagsLikeThese
#ButIDidNotAlwaysWriteWhatIAlwaysReallyWantedToWrite
#IAmWritingTheseHashtagsAWhileAfterITookThePhoto
#ThereIsNoDragonfruitInThisPicture
#ButThereIsTheCutFinger
#AndIThinkInMyEarlyPregnancyIHadAccidentsWithKnivesACoupleOfTimes
#AndThisWasTheWorstTime
#SoInTheHashtagsThatAccompanyTheDragonfruitPictureIfIHadFeltAbleToTalkAboutMyPregnancyIWouldHaveTalkedAboutBeingMoreClumsyThanNormal
#IThinkItWasJustBecauseMyBrainWasElsewhere
#WhichItShouldNotBeWhenIAmHoldingASharpKnife
#ThinkingAboutBeingPregnantAndNotBeingAbleToBelieveItProbably
#SoIHadStartedThisProjectButIWasStillWorkingOnUlteriorMonologueAsIDidNotWantToStopPostingStuff
#ButIRealisedThatINeededToTalkAboutBeingPregnant
#SoUlteriorMonologueReachedANaturalEnd
#ButIBoughtSomeTimeOnInstagramByPostingArchivePictures
#WhichIHadThoughtAboutDoingForAWhileButItGaveMeTheTimeToDoItAsILetMyPregnancyProgress
#IThinkItAnnoyedALotOfPeopleByJustPostingArchiveStuff
#ButIHaveSoMuchWorkThatIForgetIHaveHalfTheTime
#SoItWasNiceToGoThroughItAll
#ButItTookALongTimeToDo
#WhichIsWhatIWantedButByTheEndIWasBeyondDoneWithIt

It’s weird seeing myself with such long hair.

This was just an odd addition to the project where I explained Ulterior Monologue a little bit, and about buying myself time on Instagram.

I have been doing ‘dumb stuff’ at times, but I think it’s from having a toddler and being tired. I still don’t like the term ‘baby brain’.

Self-portrait of my body with a small round plaster on my left arm and a scratch on my belly.
Failed Blood Tests (7 and a half-ish weeks)
 
#SoTheyTriedToTakeMyBloodAndFailed
#ProbablyBecauseItWas10amAndIHadNotEatenYet
#AsIHadBeenSickThatMorningAndItPutMeOff
#ItSeemsSoEarlyToBeTalkingAboutOptions
#WhereIWantToGiveBirthWhenItSeemsSoEarlyAndIDoNotKnowTheFullFacts
#TheMidwifeMentionedAHomeBirth
#ILikeTheIdeaOfItButImmediatelyIJustThoughtAboutTheNeighboursAndWhatTheyWouldThink
#LivingInAFlatWithNeighboursOnMostSidesAndUpAndDownDoesNotMakeItSoAppealing
#ButIDoNotHearMuchFromThem
#ApartFromOneNeighbourWhoCoughsLoudly
#AndOnceICouldHearOneVomitingThroughTheVents
#WhichIsWhatIWorriedThisMorningWhenIWasBeingSick
#TIsWorriedAboutTheRisksOfHomeBirth
#SoINeedToFindHimSomeInfo
#OtherPeopleHaveExpressedTheirDisapproval
#WhichUpsetsMe
#AsItIsSoEarlyAndItIsNotSetInStoneYet
#ButThatIsMyPersonalPreference
#AndIAmTheOneGivingBirth
#AndIWantToFeelAsRelaxedAndComfortableAsPossibleToDoTheJobThatPeopleHaveBeenDoingForThousandsOfYears
#AsICanNotBeBotheredWithBeingSuperStressedOut
#LikeISaidMyMainConcernIsTheNeighbours
#SoLetUsHopeForAShortLabourThatIsMidDayAndNotMidNight
#ButItMightNotHappen
#MaybeIWillGoToTheHospitalOrABirthingCentre
#ABirthingPoolIsAllIReallyWant
#AsIWillNotGetASummerHolidaySoICanPretendIAmInTheSeaWhichIsWhereIFeelMostAtPeace
#FingersCrossedThatAllGoesWellFromHere
#ItAllSeemsTooEarlyButTodayMadeThingsABitMoreReal
#IDoNotKnowHowIGotTheScratchOnMyBelly

I learned a lot from all the blood tests to know to eat and drink more this time, though due to Covid my first tests were delayed anyways. They didn’t even ask me where I wanted to give birth this time. I’m also less for a homebirth as we live with my Nan, but it would be easier with not having to worry about childcare for B etc.


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Pregnancy Waiting II

Portrait Of A Mother Of A Twelve Month Old (7 Weeks? / 15th June 2021)

Self-portrait sat on the floor with legs crossed. I have a hat on that says 1 on it, and I am holding the camera of a video monitor in my right hand.
Portrait Of A Mother Of A Twelve Month Old (7 Weeks? / 15th June 2021)

#ICannotAndCanBelieveThatBIsOneYearOldItHasGoneFastInSomeWaysAndVerySlowInOtherWays
#IWroteAPoemToCelebrateHerBirthdayButItIsQuiteRubbish
#HerNewTrickIsToGargleAllHerWater
#WeTookHerOutForLunchAndSheJustSatThereGargling
#WeWentToAWildlifeParkButIThinkTiagoAndIEnjoyedItMoreThoughItWasALotForHerToTakeIn
#TiagoIsBackAtWorkNowSoINeedToAdjustToNotBeingAbleToGoOffForNapsAllTheTime
#PoorTiagoIsMoreTiredThanBeforeHeHadHisWeekOffSoIFeelBadAboutThat
#IFeelKnackeredNowAndHopeIHaveTimeForAQuickLieDownAfterThis
#WeHaveStartedToGiveBGoatsMilkInsteadOfFormulaThoughWeWillChangeToCowsMilkSoon
#TodayWasTheFirstDayOfNotGivingHerFormulaWhenSheWokeUpAndIHadToGetOnWithBreakfastPrettyQuick
#MakingFoodJustMakesMeWantToVomitButINeedToEatAsOtherwiseIFeelMoreSick
#IAmSoBoredOfFeelingSickAlready
#IWasSickForTheFirstTimeTheOtherDayButIAmTryingToAvoidItAsIHateItSoMuch
#IWasHalfWayThroughMakingBsLunchOmeletteWhenIHadToRunOut
#TiagoCameToAskTheInstructionsToFinishItInbetweenMyGags
#ItIsEitherFeelHorribleAndBeSickOrFeelSickAndEatEvenThoughIDoNotFeelLikeItAndThenFeelBetter
#IMadeBABatchOfRatatouilleThisMorningAndItReallyMadeMeFeelIllDoingIt
#EatingBeigeFoodsGenerallyMakeMeFeelBetter
#IHaveBeenGettingALotOfCravingsForReallyVinegaryChipsAndMushyPeas
#LastNightBeforeGoingToBedICouldHaveEatenACheeseAndRedOnionWhiteBap
#ReallyWateredDownJuiceSeemsToBeANewThingThatIDesire
#IDoNotLikeEatingLateButIThinkIAmGoingToHaveToOtherwiseIWillProbablyStartBeingSickInTheEvenings
#WhyArePregnantPeoplePunishedByFeelingSickAllOfTheTime
#IAmNowSayingThatIAmSevenWeeksNowAsIDoThinkItIsMoreLikelyButIJustWantToBeFurtherAlongAlready
#TiagosLaptopScreenThatBBrokeAMonthAgoSuddenlyStartedToWorkAgainSoThatIsGood
#ThisPostIsSupposedToBeAboutBTurningOneButItIsMostlyAboutMyMorningSicknessAndTiredness
#InThePictureIHopeToImitatePhotosOfBThatITookToCelebrateHerBirthday
#IGotHerAHatThatSays1OnItThoughTheySentMeOneThatSaid3OnItAtFirst
#TheOnlyThingThatWouldDistractHerWasHerBabyMonitor
#AndSheWoreAOnePieceSoIWillWearTheOneIHaveStartedToWearAgainAsIKnowIWillNotGetMuchUseOutOfItThisSummer

#ICannotAndCanBelieveThatBIsOneYearOldItHasGoneFastInSomeWaysAndVerySlowInOtherWays

My little baby who could not support her own head is now one. What. A. Year.

#IWroteAPoemToCelebrateHerBirthdayButItIsQuiteRubbish

This post was initially just going to be a poem as of course it only has 30 lines, but I did not put it into hashtag form.

Here it is for the lolz:

B You Are One!

Oh what a year, oh what a ride,

But I am so grateful to have you by my side.

This poem is already cheesy and a bit cliché,

But I thought I should write something to celebrate your first birthday.

You were born during a pandemic in the year 2020,

We stayed in hospital for four days and I ate butternut squash curry aplenty.

Your Pai was relieved to see you arrive home,

Together is better than seeing us through the small screen of our phones.

You spent your first four months in Liverpool and saw lots of the river,

Nothing much was open so all we could do was walk and dither.

Then we moved to Birmingham to live with your Great Nan,

You like lots of books but a current favourite is This Old Man.

Here you’ve learned how to crawl, babble and eat,

I think soon you’ll be walking as you’re finding your feet.

You can say Dad and duck; you do like to go to the pond,

We’re trying to work out if you’ll be a brunette or blonde.

At your baby classes you like to wander and explore,

You bang your foot in time to music on the wood of the floor.

I like when you enjoy something and so clap your hands,

We hope soon you’ll get to visit friends in far distant lands.

Maybe we’ll get to go to Portugal and meet your family there,

When you sit on the swings you like to watch people and stare.

We look forward to seeing you develop and grow,

We’re learning a lot, there’s a lot we don’t know.

We still don’t know much about what parents should do,

But we’re making the effort to find out just for you.

We’re glad you’re here, you’ll always be our little B,

We love you so much and plan to do so permanently.

Here’s to your first birthday, what a year it has been,

You’re our baby, our bunny, you’re our little queen.

The End

(23rd August: I’d completely forgotten that I wrote a poem for B….)

#HerNewTrickIsToGargleAllHerWater

Great. Take a gulp. Gargle. Take a gulp. Gargle. And repeat until the whole cup is empty.

I think she has just woken up from her nap. Fail. I had the heating on as I thought she may be cold. I’ve just put it on again. I thought that I’d been putting it on in the morning, but apparently I haven’t been. I need to try that again as she keeps waking up at 5.40am and it’s too early… She seems asleep for now.

#WeTookHerOutForLunchAndSheJustSatThereGargling

Luckily two women by us found it funny. It is funny, but it’s a bit much after 20 goes of it. I guess she is clever for working it out though…

#WeWentToAWildlifeParkButIThinkTiagoAndIEnjoyedItMoreThoughItWasALotForHerToTakeIn

Most of the animals were hiding or napping, so I don’t think B saw most of them. We only got a photo of her looking at a komodo dragon.

#TiagoIsBackAtWorkNowSoINeedToAdjustToNotBeingAbleToGoOffForNapsAllTheTime

Boo hoo hoo hoo hoo. How will I cope with two kids? Though at least I won’t be feeling sick all the time. I think/hope the first trimester is the worst.

#PoorTiagoIsMoreTiredThanBeforeHeHadHisWeekOffSoIFeelBadAboutThat

🙁

#IFeelKnackeredNowAndHopeIHaveTimeForAQuickLieDownAfterThis

If B stays asleep… It’s looking unlikely.

#WeHaveStartedToGiveBGoatsMilkInsteadOfFormulaThoughWeWillChangeToCowsMilkSoon

I did some more reading about goats milk and I think we should just move to cows milk when her carton is over. Plus just having cows milk will be easier as we can use it with all her cooking.

She seemed unsure of the milk, but now I just make sure to warm it up a little bit. I gave her 100ml before she had this nap and she probably drank 80/90 of it, so that’s good. Yesterday she didn’t drink much, but it probably didn’t help that we gave her formula in the morning. Apparently it’s sweeter?

#TodayWasTheFirstDayOfNotGivingHerFormulaWhenSheWokeUpAndIHadToGetOnWithBreakfastPrettyQuick

She was upset and I thought maybe she was hungry. She got up at 5.40am. She had some water. She had breakfast at 7am.

#MakingFoodJustMakesMeWantToVomitButINeedToEatAsOtherwiseIFeelMoreSick

I make a tomato and egg omelette/scrambled egg thing for myself with garlic powder, pepper and oregano then bung it between two pieces of buttered toast. I just have to eat it slowly. I make it for myself after B’s porridge has been pancaked and the pan is still hot. Boring info.

#IAmSoBoredOfFeelingSickAlready

Boredd.

#IWasSickForTheFirstTimeTheOtherDayButIAmTryingToAvoidItAsIHateItSoMuch #IWasHalfWayThroughMakingBsLunchOmeletteWhenIHadToRunOut

I have days where I just feel sick all day. I have started a Puke Portraits II project, but I hope to just keep it to a very small number of images. I also can’t be bothered to spend the time writing hashtags and editing the images.

#TiagoCameToAskTheInstructionsToFinishItInbetweenMyGags

Lovely.

#ItIsEitherFeelHorribleAndBeSickOrFeelSickAndEatEvenThoughIDoNotFeelLikeItAndThenFeelBetter

A friend was saying the other day that when you usually feel sick you don’t want to eat and you don’t, but with pregnancy sickness you have to eat. Yep.

#IMadeBABatchOfRatatouilleThisMorningAndItReallyMadeMeFeelIllDoingIt

I was supposed to do it yesterday but Tiago was busy and I didn’t look for the passata well enough, and I felt too sick to make it so I didn’t bother trying much harder.

#EatingBeigeFoodsGenerallyMakeMeFeelBetter

Nan got some crumpets. Great. Mini cheddars seem like a good option at the moment. Crisps in general. I’m trying to eat more nuts…

#IHaveBeenGettingALotOfCravingsForReallyVinegaryChipsAndMushyPeas

Writing this and reading this makes me want them again.

#LastNightBeforeGoingToBedICouldHaveEatenACheeseAndRedOnionWhiteBap

Not feeling that so much now. My Nan bought some baps and made a cheese and tomato one before dinner yesterday. I could eat one of those now…

#ReallyWateredDownJuiceSeemsToBeANewThingThatIDesire

Water with a hint of something. Going to try elderflower cordial, though I probably should have asked for some ginger cordial instead…

#IDoNotLikeEatingLateButIThinkIAmGoingToHaveToOtherwiseIWillProbablyStartBeingSickInTheEvenings

Piece of toast before bed? Probably a good idea.

#WhyArePregnantPeoplePunishedByFeelingSickAllOfTheTime

Whoever/whatever invented pregnancy symptoms is a sod. Aren’t we punished enough with periods and menopause? Then we don’t get periods, which is nice, but then we have to deal with sickness. Sod. To those who don’t get morning sickness – you’re lucky!

#IAmNowSayingThatIAmSevenWeeksNowAsIDoThinkItIsMoreLikelyButIJustWantToBeFurtherAlongAlready

I just want to be clear of the first trimester already, and I want to get my jab. (I know I can get it already, but I do want to wait until 14 weeks like some countries suggest/are doing.)

#TiagosLaptopScreenThatBBrokeAMonthAgoSuddenlyStartedToWorkAgainSoThatIsGood

He came in showing me his laptop all excited. I was like ‘yeah the Google logo has always looked like that?’ Ahhh okay.

#ThisPostIsSupposedToBeAboutBTurningOneButItIsMostlyAboutMyMorningSicknessAndTiredness

Sorry love. I should have just made this post the poem and left my sickness until later in the week. I’m starting to feel a bit sick again now…

#InThePictureIHopeToImitatePhotosOfBThatITookToCelebrateHerBirthday

One hat. All in one outfit. Holding a video monitor. Looking quite serious.

(23rd August: I seemed to achieve it.)

#IGotHerAHatThatSays1OnItThoughTheySentMeOneThatSaid3OnItAtFirst

Well that will keep. Let’s see if I can find it in 2 years.

#TheOnlyThingThatWouldDistractHerWasHerBabyMonitor

We tried all the toys. T was getting frustrated. She liked the baby monitor and her room thermometer – things we don’t usually let her play with. I managed to move the thermometer out of the frame though.

#AndSheWoreAOnePieceSoIWillWearTheOneIHaveStartedToWearAgainAsIKnowIWillNotGetMuchUseOutOfItThisSummer

I suddenly remembered about it yesterday. I don’t remember wearing it last summer, and if things go to plan I doubt I will be fitting in it for much longer.

I’m going to eat some mini cheddars, then have a lie down…

7 weeks pregnant with B comparison:

A diptych of two full length images of me with my top pulled up to document my bump. In one I
I Have Nothing To Show Yet (7 weeks)
 
#ItIsColdNowSoIAmWearingExtraLayers
#IHaveNothingToShowYet
#OrMaybeIDoButIAmSureIHaveLookedTheSameAsThisEveryTimeIHaveEatenForManyYears
#IHaveLookedMorePregnantBeforeAfterOrderingAnIndianTakeawayAndNotBeingAbleToStop
#AtChristmas2018MyParentsThoughtIWasPregnantAsIWasWearingBaggyClothing
#AndIChooseComfortOverFashion
#YouKnowMe
#ThoughIWouldNotMindLookingALittleBetter
#IJustHateClothesShopping
#AndNowIsNotTheTimeToStartGettingIntoClothesMore
#BecauseTheyEitherWillNotFitMeForLongOrTheyWillNotFitMeAfter
#AGoodReasonForBaggierClothingThisWinterThoughIsToHideMyGrowingBoobs
#IToldAFriendThatIAmPregnantAndSheSaidSheThoughtMyBoobsLookedBiggerAndThisWasTwoWeeksAgo
#IHaveAlwaysHadAWeirdRelationshipWithThem
#BeingToldInHighSchoolThatIWasTwoParacetamolsOnAnIroningBoard
#AndBeingUpsetButAlsoNotCaringAsIWasLikeBoobsAreJustForBabiesAnyways
#AndTheIdeaOfMeWithBiggerBoobsWasJustWeird
#BeingToldByGuysThatTheyUsuallyDateGirlsWithBiggerBoobs
#Lol 
#ButIThinkBoobsBringAttentionAndIDoLikeToBeInvisible
#IReallyCanNotImagineMySelfHavingBigBoobs
#AndGoingOutWithThemOnDisplay
#NoOffenceToOtherPeopleWhoShowTheirsOff
#TheyLookGoodOnYouButTheyLookWeirdAsHellOnMe
#ThisPostHasTooManyBoobs
#NotSureIfIPreferBoobsOrBreasts
#BreastsJustSoundsLikeMeatRightNowAndThatIsMakingMeFeelSickEvenThoughIHadMeatCravingsYesterdayAndIAmVegetarian
#IThinkHowIFeelTowardsMyBodyDuringAndAfterMyPregnancyWillBeInteresting
#ParticularlyAsPregnantIsSeenAsBeautifulAndMyBodyGrowingIsForAGoodThingButThenAsSoonAsYouGiveBirthThereIsALotOfPressureToBeAsYouWereAgain
#IJustWantToLookAfterMyselfAndBodyAsBestAsICan 

B and baby X will be born in complete opposite seasons. In this diptych I am cold, but in my new photo I was quite hot.

I still look a mess all the time, so nothing has changed there. I feel like my boobs didn’t grow as quick this time, which I was kind of relieved about. They’re probably different from breastfeeding, but I can’t really tell.

I think my bump started to show a bit earlier this time, but it also may be just down to food. I seem to have a habit of doing shoots just after eating which doesn’t help.

I need to start eating better and exercising more again. I feel like over the last week I’ve let myself (and X) down a bit on that front. I’m trying my best…


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Categories
Pregnancy Waiting II

Mum Looks #1 (10 Weeks? / 11th June 2021)

Self-portrait of myself wearing a colourful top and shorts. I have a book tucked into the back of my shorts and a pig puppet hanging out of my pocket.
Mum Looks #1 (10 Weeks? / 11th June 2021)
 
#ThisIsHowICarriedAPuppetAndABookUpTheStairsTheOtherDayWhileHoldingB
#ThePuppetUsedToDistractHerDuringNappyChangesButNowALittleMusicalPianoWorksBetter
#TheBookIsTheVeryHungryCaterpillarWhichBLikesALot
#NotLongAgoIWasTalkingToAnotherMumAboutAnUpcomingBookFestivalWhereAuthorsWillReadTheirBooks
#IJokedThatAllOfBsFavouriteAuthorsAreDeadAsIThoughtThatEricCarleHadDiedALongTimeAgo
#IWasSurprisedAfterAQuickOnlineSearchThatHeWasStillAliveButThenHeDiedACoupleOfWeeksLater
#IWasSupposedToHaveMyFirstVaccineThisWeekButAfterALotOfResearchIDecidedToWaitUntilIAmInMySecondTrimester
#TheBabyDevelopsSoMuchInTheFirstTrimesterAndIAmFeelingSoSick
#TheyDoNotKnowTheLongTermEffectsOfTheVaccinationsOnUnbornBabiesSoIWouldRatherWaitABit
#IrelandSuggestsWaitingUntil14WeeksToGetTheVaccineAndIHaveSeenThatInAFewPlaces
#SoIJustNeedToBeCarefulAndTryNotToGetCovidBeforeThen
#InABabyClassTheOtherDayWeDidNotHaveToWearAMaskWhenWeWereSatDown
#AndInATakeawayAGuyWalkedInWithoutAMaskButIPlanToKeepWearingMineUntilIGetAVaccine
#IAmStartingToThinkThatMaybeIAmMoreSixWeeksPregnantThanTen
#IThinkIWouldHaveBeenFeelingThisSickForLongerIfIWasTenWeeks
#ButIWasAlsoSoConvincedThatIWasPregnantWhenIWouldHaveOnlyBeenTwoWeeksIfIAmOnlySixWeeksNow
#ItHasBeenGoodThatTiagoHadThisWeekOffAsItMeansIHaveHadPlentyOfTimeToRest
#WeHaveNotDoneMuchButThatIsFineAsIHaveBeenFeelingSoTiredAndSick
#BWokeUpAtSixFortyTodayRatherThanFiveFortyWhichWasABitOfARelief
#WeHaveSatInTheParkAlotAndTodayWePlanToGoToAWildlifeCentre
#IUpdatedHerBabyBookTheOtherDaySoItIsNearlyCompleteNow
#IFeelLikeTheSecondKidWillNotHaveSuchAGoodOneButINeedToMakeTheEffortToMakeSureTheyHaveSomething
#TheWombMustBeQuiteResilientToDealWithPregnantPeopleLookingAfterKids
#BIsAlwaysFallingOnMeOrUsingMyStomachAsASupportPost
#IHaveAlreadyHadMoreKnocksToMyStomachThanIDidDuringMyWholePregnancyWithHer
#LastTimeWhenIWasPregnantIGotALetterFromTheMidwivesAfterTwoDays
#LastNightIGotATextFromMyDoctorsSayingINeedToPickAReferralLetterUpFromReception
#IAmGuessingItIsToDoWithTheMidwivesButItSeemsWeirdThatTheyDoNotPostOrEmailIt
#WellIWentToPickUpMyLetterUpAndIHaveCalledTheHospital
#TheyHavePutMeDownAsSixWeeksForNowAndApparentlyTheyDoNotHaveABedForMeAtTheDueDateIfIAmTenWeeks

(20th August: This probably won’t become a mini-series, but maybe it should. I think my whole project is just Mum Looks – me looking dishevelled.)

#ThisIsHowICarriedAPuppetAndABookUpTheStairsTheOtherDayWhileHoldingB

I tried to take a photo of my look on my phone at the time, but it was hard.

#ThePuppetUsedToDistractHerDuringNappyChangesButNowALittleMusicalPianoWorksBetter

I think it plays about four tunes automatically and I seem to know which one is coming next now. (If I know which one is coming I should know how many it has, but I can’t be bothered to work it out.)

(20th August: It has four. Now I just use any tactic to get her to stay still. Earlier I was using her bath toy, but sometimes it’s a tub with the lid screwed on tight, or a book or anything.)

#TheBookIsTheVeryHungryCaterpillarWhichBLikesALot

I haven’t read it to her in a few days, which I am somewhat happy about as I need a break from it.

#NotLongAgoIWasTalkingToAnotherMumAboutAnUpcomingBookFestivalWhereAuthorsWillReadTheirBooks

I think a lot of children’s authors will be present.

#IJokedThatAllOfBsFavouriteAuthorsAreDeadAsIThoughtThatEricCarleHadDiedALongTimeAgo

She was a Mum at the park and we had a very brief conversation. She likes a lot of Pam Adams’ books and I just looked and she died in 2010…

#IWasSurprisedAfterAQuickOnlineSearchThatHeWasStillAliveButThenHeDiedACoupleOfWeeksLater

RIP Eric Carle. We like his From Head To Toe book too.

#IWasSupposedToHaveMyFirstVaccineThisWeekButAfterALotOfResearchIDecidedToWaitUntilIAmInMySecondTrimester

It was stressing me out, so now I am glad I decided to wait.

(20th August: I ended up getting the vaccine at 13 weeks after advice became a bit more consistent. I was also swayed by a talk by Pregnant Then Screwed and Viki Male, an immunologist. Here is the talk on Instagram.)

#TheBabyDevelopsSoMuchInTheFirstTrimesterAndIAmFeelingSoSick #TheyDoNotKnowTheLongTermEffectsOfTheVaccinationsOnUnbornBabiesSoIWouldRatherWaitABit

Research shows that babies are being born fine, but it is too early to know if there are long term effects and when is best to get the vaccine.

I’m feeling sick all of the time so I don’t want to get ill on top of it if I have a bad reaction…

#IrelandSuggestsWaitingUntil14WeeksToGetTheVaccineAndIHaveSeenThatInAFewPlaces

I saw on Twitter that a country (not sure which one) was offering the vaccine to women over 14 weeks. The UK and my doctor say all trimesters are fine, but I’d rather wait…

#SoIJustNeedToBeCarefulAndTryNotToGetCovidBeforeThen

I’ve managed it this far, but you never know.

#InABabyClassTheOtherDayWeDidNotHaveToWearAMaskWhenWeWereSatDown

I walked in and was like ‘why does everyone look different?’ After a while a couple more women walked in wearing them, but the teacher said we don’t have to wear them while sat down. I took mine off, though I wanted to keep it on. Next time I will as B runs off a lot so I need to get up and pick her up.

#AndInATakeawayAGuyWalkedInWithoutAMaskButIPlanToKeepWearingMineUntilIGetAVaccine

I shouldn’t let my awkwardness affect my personal safety. Maybe it’s unnecessary but I do not want to risk it.

I definitely will have a vaccine in my second trimester as getting Covid in the third trimester is quite dangerous for a pregnant person.

#IAmStartingToThinkThatMaybeIAmMoreSixWeeksPregnantThanTen

This ball of fun again.

#IThinkIWouldHaveBeenFeelingThisSickForLongerIfIWasTenWeeks

Looking at my Waiting project I was feeling sick at 6 weeks and by 8 weeks I felt really bad.

#ButIWasAlsoSoConvincedThatIWasPregnantWhenIWouldHaveOnlyBeenTwoWeeksIfIAmOnlySixWeeksNow

With B I had a period of two days, then it stopped so I thought it was weird, did a pregnancy test and I was about 4 weeks.

Earlier in the year when I was pregnant I had a period of sorts, then I was starting to wake up feeling sick and I was pregnant. About 6 weeks.

This time I had a normal period, then what seemed like a normal period, then a missed period. Then I did a test. I was feeling a bit sick before my missed period/or imagining things as I wanted to be pregnant. ?

#ItHasBeenGoodThatTiagoHadThisWeekOffAsItMeansIHaveHadPlentyOfTimeToRest

I am going to struggle when he goes back to work next week.

#WeHaveNotDoneMuchButThatIsFineAsIHaveBeenFeelingSoTiredAndSick

It’s been nice to just chill at home with T being available.

#BWokeUpAtSixFortyTodayRatherThanFiveFortyWhichWasABitOfARelief

Her heating comes on for a bit between 4 and 5, but it has been the last few days so who knows why she slept better today?

#WeHaveSatInTheParkAlotAndTodayWePlanToGoToAWildlifeCentre

Simple things. Hopefully she likes the centre today.

#IUpdatedHerBabyBookTheOtherDaySoItIsNearlyCompleteNow

Hurrah. I hadn’t looked at in a few months.

#IFeelLikeTheSecondKidWillNotHaveSuchAGoodOneButINeedToMakeTheEffortToMakeSureTheyHaveSomething

Or I need to change the way I do it. I’d feel bad if they didn’t have one.

#TheWombMustBeQuiteResilientToDealWithPregnantPeopleLookingAfterKids #BIsAlwaysFallingOnMeOrUsingMyStomachAsASupportPost #IHaveAlreadyHadMoreKnocksToMyStomachThanIDidDuringMyWholePregnancyWithHer

It freaks me out a bit when she touches my stomach, but I’m sure the baby is well protected.

#LastTimeWhenIWasPregnantIGotALetterFromTheMidwivesAfterTwoDays

Even though my Doctor said there was a massive delay with them.

#LastNightIGotATextFromMyDoctorsSayingINeedToPickAReferralLetterUpFromReception #IAmGuessingItIsToDoWithTheMidwivesButItSeemsWeirdThatTheyDoNotPostOrEmailIt

So it took longer to do the referral letter this time than it did for me to get a letter in the post this time? I know they’re busy. Maybe they thought it would be quicker for me to pick it up. It seems weird though. I’m going to go pick it up now.

#WellIWentToPickUpMyLetterUpAndIHaveCalledTheHospital

I guess they say to pick it up from reception now as the Doctors is operating more like in the ‘old days’ now. No having to wait outside for ages – the door was open.

I got myself a veggie samosa from a nearby shop on the way back and it was good.

#TheyHavePutMeDownAsSixWeeksForNowAndApparentlyTheyDoNotHaveABedForMeAtTheDueDateIfIAmTenWeeks

She said only I could say what date to put me down as. I said for 10 weeks. She said ‘well there are no beds left for then’. So I said to put me down as 6 weeks for now and we will have to see. If I wanted to be put down as 10 weeks a letter had to be sent to the higher ups or something, and maybe I am just 6 weeks. What a faff.

She said the first appointment will either be on the phone or in person. Last time they told me it would be on the phone, so things are changing.

(20th August: I was only 6 weeks here.)

6 weeks pregnant with B comparison:

Self-portrait of me sat with a purple scarf over myself. My left hand is just below my lips and I am gazing off and look deep in thought, though possibly just feeling sick.
Morning Sickness Is Not Only A Morning Thing (6 and a half weeks)
 
#SoTheSicknessComesAndGoes
#MorningSicknessIsSuchALie
#IAskedTheDoctorIfSheHadAnyTipsAfterIFirstWentWhenIFoundOut
#SheSaidThatMorningSicknessIsNotOnlyAMorningThing
#WellSheDidNotLie
#SometimesItIsTheMorning
#YesterdayICouldHaveBeenSickOverEverything
#LastWeekItWasMoreAnAfternoonThing
#ButSometimesItIsTheEvening
#SomeoneWasTalkingAboutWarmCamelsMilkTheOtherDay
#AndItWasMakingMeSoIll
#ThenILookedAtMyCollectionOfSoups
#AndJustReadingTheFlavoursMadeMeFeelIll
#ItIsSuchAWeirdThing
#IKnowThatNoOneReallyLikesToVomit
#ButIReallyHateIt
#IOnceProudlyCouldSayIHadNotVomitedInAtLeast10Years
#AndThenMyHousemateMadeMeSuperStrongRumCocktailsWhenIWasDoingMyBA
#AndThatWasGrim
#AndACharmingExBoyfriendTookPolaroidsOfMeByTheToilet 
#EvenThoughHeWasSickMostWeekendsBecauseOfAlcohol
#IDoNotKnowWhatHappenedToThosePolaroids
#BetTheyShowUpIn50Years
#Anyways
#YesterdayIHadStrongMeatAndFishCravingsEvenThoughIHaveBeenVegetarianForOverHalfMyLife
#CouldHaveEasilyEatenCodAndChipsOrATurkeyAndStuffingSandwich
#ThoughIThinkTheyWouldHaveMadeMeSick
#SoLastNightISettledForAVeganFishFreeBurger
#ItWasProbablyTheFirstTimeIHadEatenAFishBurger
#AndItWasAlrightButIWouldNotBeInARushToEatItAgain

Morning sickness is definitely a lie. With B I was generally sick in the mornings though struggled to eat anything at dinner except for pasta. This time I have been mostly sick in the evenings.

I didn’t like soup again this time and things like baked beans.

I haven’t had strong meat and fish cravings this time, though I’ve been taking double the amount of iron lately.

The bit about my ex-boyfriend taking pictures of me vomiting isn’t pleasant, but it’s true. Now I just take pictures of myself after vomiting…


Thanks for reading! If you’re enjoying my blog (and/or the work I make) please consider supporting me by ‘buying me a coffee’ on Ko-fi – thanks!

Categories
Pregnancy Waiting II

Imitating B Closing Her Eyes As She Knocks Down A Tower Of Blocks (10 Weeks? / 7th June 2021)

Self-portrait with my eyes closed. B's bricks are stacked up with 5 rows of 2 on top of each other with just one at the top. I am holding onto the top one with my left hand and pushing them.
Imitating B Closing Her Eyes As She Knocks Down A Tower Of Blocks (10 Weeks? / 7th June 2021)
 
#BHasBeenClosingHerEyesBeforeDoingLoudThingsForQuiteAWhile
#ItUsedToBeThatBeforeSheDroppedHerCupFromHerHighchairSheWouldCloseThem
#ILikeToSeeHowTallICanBuildATowerBeforeSheComesToKnockItOver
#TheBlocksBelongToTheWalkerThatSheHas
#SheIsGettingReallyGoodWithItAndSomeDaysSheWillJustKeepGoingUpAndDownTheRoomWithIt
#ThoughSheStillNeedsToLearnHowToTurnItRoundAsWeHaveToDoThatForHer
#SheIsAlsoGettingQuickerAtMovingAroundTheRoomWhileHoldingOntoFurniture
#IAmAlrightButJustFeelingQuiteSickForMostOfTheDay
#ITryToDrinkWaterRegularlyAndEatOftenButMaybeItIsMoreDownToTiredness
#BKeepsWakingUpAroundFiveFortyAtTheMomentWhichIsNotMuchFun
#IOftenWakeUpAtFiveByMyselfButWillThenFallBackToSleep
#TheOtherDayIReallyFanciedChipsWithCurrySauceWhichIHadAndItWasGreat
#ItMayHaveBeenACravingOrItMayJustHaveBeenANormalFoodFancy
#IfIWatchAnythingThatShowsFoodInItBeforeGoingToBedIGetSoHungry
#BSaysDuckALotNowWhichIsQuiteCute
#SometimesSheSeemsToSayYuckWhichIsFunny
#TalkingOfBirdsThoughHavingABlackbirdNestInTheGardenIsNotAsCoolAsIInitiallyThought
#AboutFourDaysAgoICouldHearLotsOfNoiseSoILookedOutTheWindowAfterAWhileAndIScaredAMagpieAwayFromTheNest
#IWasUpsetAndAssumedTheChicksWereAllDeadAndItPutMeInABadMood
#ISawTheParentsTheNextDayWithWhatLookedLikeFoodInTheirMouthButIThoughtThatMaybeTheyWereBuildingANewNest
#TheNextDayIWasNearbyAndIHeardCheepingThenSawABlackbirdFlyToTheNestAndIWasSoHappy
#ThenLaterThatDayIHeardMoreNoiseAndLookedOutOfTheWindowExpectingToSeeAMagpieButInsteadISawADeadChickOnTheFloor
#IDoNotKnowWhatHappenedButIHaveSeenNoActivityAroundTheNestSinceSoItMayHaveBeenTheLastChick
#NatureIsBeautifulNatureIsCruel
#TheDoctorCalledMeToAskMeQuestions
#HeHasPutDownMyLastPeriodAs6WeeksAgoButIReallyDoThinkIAmTenWeeks
#ThoughNowIAmStartingToDoubtMyselfAsWouldIHaveHadAPeriodSixWeeksAgoIfIWasPregnant
#IGuessItWillBeAWhileUntilIHaveAScanSoWeShallHaveToSee
#HeSaidItIsFineForMeToHaveAVaccinationAndNowIThinkUnderFortiesAreLimitedToWhichOnesTheyCanHaveAnyways
#HeWillReferMeToTheMidwifeServiceSoHopefullyIWillReceiveALetterFromThemSoon

#BHasBeenClosingHerEyesBeforeDoingLoudThingsForQuiteAWhile #ItUsedToBeThatBeforeSheDroppedHerCupFromHerHighchairSheWouldCloseThem

It makes me laugh, but I guess it is smart/sensible? Though it would be smarter if she covered her ears I guess…

#ILikeToSeeHowTallICanBuildATowerBeforeSheComesToKnockItOver

I will loudly count or say the colours out loud before she notices. It depends where we are as on some surfaces I can get it quite high, but it is a bit too dangerous so now I have to restrict it.

#TheBlocksBelongToTheWalkerThatSheHas #SheIsGettingReallyGoodWithItAndSomeDaysSheWillJustKeepGoingUpAndDownTheRoomWithIt #ThoughSheStillNeedsToLearnHowToTurnItRoundAsWeHaveToDoThatForHer

Some days we use it loads, some days we don’t. We should really be more consistent with it.

#SheIsAlsoGettingQuickerAtMovingAroundTheRoomWhileHoldingOntoFurniture

This morning she was going up and down the sofa pretty fast.

#IAmAlrightButJustFeelingQuiteSickForMostOfTheDay

I feel sick now. Fun times.

#ITryToDrinkWaterRegularlyAndEatOftenButMaybeItIsMoreDownToTiredness

I’m just at home most of the time so it means I can snack and drink well. I also eat breakfast earlier than I used to, which I am hoping might help but we’ll see. I am worried about going off my food like last time. Yesterday at dinner B was covered in food and it made me feel a bit sick.

#BKeepsWakingUpAroundFiveFortyAtTheMomentWhichIsNotMuchFun

The other day she had a two hour nap in the morning, yesterday she had forty minutes, so let’s see how well she naps today. I want to finish this then have a lie down…

#IOftenWakeUpAtFiveByMyselfButWillThenFallBackToSleep

This morning I could hear people outside at 5. I wasn’t sure if they drunk and still out, or maybe they were on their way to work.

#TheOtherDayIReallyFanciedChipsWithCurrySauceWhichIHadAndItWasGreat

Mmm.

#ItMayHaveBeenACravingOrItMayJustHaveBeenANormalFoodFancy

I fancy a lot of food at the moment. Hoping to get a falafel wrap today…

#IfIWatchAnythingThatShowsFoodInItBeforeGoingToBedIGetSoHungry

We’re been speed watching (1.25x if with Tiago or 1.5x by myself) some trashy stuff on Netflix, and if they eat I get realllllly hungry. I’m getting hungry now thinking about food and I had a good breakfast not long ago.

#BSaysDuckALotNowWhichIsQuiteCute

Duck duck duck duck duck.

#SometimesSheSeemsToSayYuckWhichIsFunny

I can’t wait until she says more.

#TalkingOfBirdsThoughHavingABlackbirdNestInTheGardenIsNotAsCoolAsIInitiallyThought

It’s been stressful/sad.

#AboutFourDaysAgoICouldHearLotsOfNoiseSoILookedOutTheWindowAfterAWhileAndIScaredAMagpieAwayFromTheNest #IWasUpsetAndAssumedTheChicksWereAllDeadAndItPutMeInABadMood

I had looked online to see if magpies will eat blackbird chicks and it said yeah. My Mum said there is less food for birds at the moment, so this also might be why.

#ISawTheParentsTheNextDayWithWhatLookedLikeFoodInTheirMouthButIThoughtThatMaybeTheyWereBuildingANewNest

Food or twigs? It looked like food.

#TheNextDayIWasNearbyAndIHeardCheepingThenSawABlackbirdFlyToTheNestAndIWasSoHappy

Sooo happy.

#ThenLaterThatDayIHeardMoreNoiseAndLookedOutOfTheWindowExpectingToSeeAMagpieButInsteadISawADeadChickOnTheFloor

🙁

#IDoNotKnowWhatHappenedButIHaveSeenNoActivityAroundTheNestSinceSoItMayHaveBeenTheLastChick

I felt bad. I was wishing that the blackbirds were able to communicate to me so that I would have been able to help them.

The pregnancy has been making me more emotional, so I really didn’t need a blackbird saga. The chick was a lot bigger than I thought it would be. I wonder if a magpie came, but then dropped it? I don’t know.

Luckily/sadly it was gone not long after, but I do not want to sit out there for a while.

#NatureIsBeautifulNatureIsCruel

I’ve really got into birds since living at my Nan’s house, but when I was pregnant I really liked to see the goslings, ducks and cygnets growing up by us in Liverpool.

#TheDoctorCalledMeToAskMeQuestions

I was worried that I would be waiting all day, but I had left some space at the bottom of my hashtags and I was starting to write my blog post.

#HeHasPutDownMyLastPeriodAs6WeeksAgoButIReallyDoThinkIAmTenWeeks

He said that I know my body better than him, but he has put 6 weeks anyways. I should have just given him the earlier date.

#ThoughNowIAmStartingToDoubtMyselfAsWouldIHaveHadAPeriodSixWeeksAgoIfIWasPregnant

The body is weird. Who knows. Maybe I am 6 weeks though.

(16th August: I was 6 weeks.)

#IGuessItWillBeAWhileUntilIHaveAScanSoWeShallHaveToSee

I am so impatient.

#HeSaidItIsFineForMeToHaveAVaccinationAndNowIThinkUnderFortiesAreLimitedToWhichOnesTheyCanHaveAnyways

‘If you’re under 40, you’ll only be shown appointments for the Pfizer/BioNTech or Moderna vaccines. If you’re 40 or over, you’ll be asked if you’re pregnant to make sure you’re only shown appointments for these vaccines.’

#HeWillReferMeToTheMidwifeServiceSoHopefullyIWillReceiveALetterFromThemSoon

I just read the hashtags from my pregnancy project that was not to be and it said he said to not expect to hear from them anytime soon, but I got a letter two days later. This time he didn’t say expect a wait, so we’ll see. Knowing my luck it will take 2 weeks.

6 weeks pregnant with B comparison:

The new picture doesn’t really show me pregnant as this project is a mix of pregnancy, and motherhood photos.

I'm lying on the living room floor in a dark pink top with my hair flowing down. My legs are bare and lifted off the ground with one foot supporting the other.
I Can Tell My Body Is Already Changing (6 weeks)

#WellWeHadBeenTryingToGetPregnantSinceTheStartOfTheYear
#WeHaveAWeddingToGoToInPortugalInJulyNextYearSoIThoughtWeShouldPauseThingsForABit
#ButTiagoSaidWeWereBetterOffTrying
#AndToBeFairIThoughtICouldNotGetPregnant
#EvenThoughIHadABloodTestAtOvulationOnceAndTheySaidAllWasGood
#SoIDecidedIWantedToBeLessStressedOutInLifeSoIStartedToMakeAnEffortToBeMoreRelaxed
#WhenMyPeriodWas4DaysLateIKnowSomethingWasUp
#SoIBoughtATest
#AndIForgotIWasGoingToDoOneSoIHadToKeepDrinkingWaterAndEventuallyIManagedToGetAResultFromTheDamnThing
#AndTheCrossCameUpPrettyQuickThen
#AndIWasNotThatSurprised
#IDidNotHaveMuchOfAReaction
#IWasJustRelievedToKnowICouldGetPregnant
#AndThenIJustGotRealStressedAboutWhatIfThingsGoWrong
#IDoNotKnowHowPeopleDealtWithPregnanciesPreInternet
#AnythingAndIAmCheckingIsThisNormal
#AnywaysICanTellMyBodyIsAlreadyChanging
#AndIHaveBeenFeelingSick
#MorningSicknessIsALieItStrikesAtAnytime
#ButItIsEarlyDaysForMeSoItIsNotYetThatBad
#IKnowINeedToEatMoreCalciumSoIAmIndulgingInCheddarOnSandwiches
#WasTryingToCutOutSugarButWasEatingChutneyAndPickleSoAmHavingMoreMarmiteThanThoseNow
#AndIAmGoingOffFoods
#LikeDaalOrDalOrDahlWhichWeEatAllTheTimeUsually
#AndMyFavouriteLunchOfASpicyBeanBurgerWithGherkinsTomatoesAndHoumousIsNotAsGreatAsItUsedToBe
#AndIHaveEatenThatWeeklyForYears
#AndIMeanYEARS
#AndICanNotDrinkMostOfMyLargeCollectionOfHerbalTeas
#AsEverythingHasLicoriceInIt
#SoItIsRooibosAndHoneybushEverydayForNowUntilIFindOtherOnes

I haven’t got back into drinking herbal tea since being pregnant with B, but I also drank more when I was in an office setting and I haven’t been in one of those since before England’s first lockdown.

We ended up having two weddings to go to, but one got postponed and one got cancelled (they’ve got married). I’m still stressed that things could go wrong, but B is a big distraction this time. She also makes time go by fast, though the days are long.

I have been noticing my body changes and of course I couldn’t help but notice the sick feelings, but it is different this time with having B around.


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Categories
Misc

Scenario’s The Wait Episode

Just a quick post to announce that Scenario’s The Wait episode is now live.

Scenario is a photography podcast bringing you hidden stories from behind the camera. Told as a narrative, Scenario follows photographers as they make their work and their projects come to life. You can find it wherever you get your podcasts!

Scenario’s brand new episode THE WAIT follows Jocelyn Allen, who has been making self-portraits for over 10 years, as she documents her pregnancy and becoming a mother for the first time during a global pandemic.

I spoke with Jess at the start of England’s first lockdown (March 2020) and then a few months ago (April 2021). We talked photography projects, hypnobirthing, birthing, dancing, hashtags and more, which has been packed into a ~30 minute episode.

Click here for links to Spotify, iTunes and Acast (or listen below on Spotify).


Thanks for reading! If you’re enjoying my blog (and/or the work I make) please consider supporting me by ‘buying me a coffee’ on Ko-fi – thanks!

Categories
Pregnancy Waiting II

I Just Want To Know How Pregnant I Am (9 Weeks? / 3rd June 2021)

A duvet cover hangs in the background as a backdrop. I am facing the left of the image with my hand on my hip. I am wearing a dark blue top and black leggings. Half of my hair is tied up in a messy bun, and I am arching my back.
I Just Want To Know How Pregnant I Am (9 Weeks? / 3rd June 2021)
 
#AmIFiveWeeksOrNineWeeksIJustWantToKnow
#IThinkIAmNineButIWillNotKnowForSureUntilADatingScan
#ThisPictureIsImitatingAPictureITookOfMyselfInJanuaryWhenIMayHaveBeenSevenWeeksPregnant
#ItIsWeirdThinkingHowPregnantICouldHaveBeenRightNow
#IAmNotLookingForwardToBDroppingANapSoonAsILikeHavingTimeToRestAndDoMyOwnStuffWhenSheSleeps
#IAmQuiteTiredAndISeemToWakeUpALotInTheNightNowButFindItHardToNapDuringTheDay
#IAmNotSureIfThisIsDueToBeingPregnantOrIfItIsBecauseOfTheWeather
#TheOtherDayBeforeITookTheTestTiagoSaidIMustBePregnantAsHeSawAMagpieAndSpokeToIt
#WhenHeWasOutsideOfTheHospitalWaitingForNewsOnMeBeforeBWasBornHeSpokeToAMagpieForReassurance
#ThisAllSoundsWeirdAndIsVeryUnlikeTiagoButIGuessInAnxiousTimesWeTakeComfortInWhatWeCan
#SpeakingOfBirdsAsItHasBeenSoHotBAndMeHaveJustBeenPlayingInTheGardenALot
#TheOtherDayIRealisedThatThereIsABlackbirdsNextRightByOurFavouriteSpotInTheShade
#FromTimeToTimeWeHaveToMoveAsICanSeeTheParentBlackbirdsWaitingWithFoodInTheirMouths
#TheyWillNotFlyToTheNestWhileWeAreAroundAsIThinkTheyThinkItIsTopSecretOrSomething
#IOnlyFoundItAsIHeardTheChicksCheepingAndRealisedTheyWereReallyCloseBy
#SoNowIHaveStartedToTakeBToTheParkMoreAndWeSitInTheShadeThere
#ItIsLessStressfulAsInTheGardenBHasALeafInHerMouthEveryFiveSeconds
#SheIsGettingCheekierEveryDay
#SometimesIPretendToChaseHerAndSheLaughsThoughSheGenerallyJustCrawlsIntoADeadEnd
#NanSaidThatYesterdayBTookAStepAndIDidNotReallyBelieveHer
#ThenThisMorningBWasStoodUpInFrontOfMeAndThenDidStepOnce
#SheIsStillBuildingUpHerStrengthButIsGettingBetterWithHerWalker
#SheAlsoHasASecondToothNowWhichMustHaveBeenWhySheKeptWakingUpSoMuchOneNightLastWeek
#BIsGettingMoreFidgetyAndHarderToChangeSoIDoWorryHowItWillBeIfAndWhenIAmMorePregnant
#IHaveToSingHerFavouritePortugueseSongsToTryToChillHerOutButTheyDoNotAlwaysWork
#IGetNervousEveryTimeIGoToTheBathroom
#EspeciallyIfIHaveNotLongHadACramp
#INeedToRememberThatGoodishCrampsExistTooAsItIsJustASignOfThingsStretching
#IAmTryingToBeatMyselfUpLessAboutMyMotheringNow
#AsLongAsIAmTryingMyBestThenThatIsAllICanDo

#AmIFiveWeeksOrNineWeeksIJustWantToKnow

I feel like I have/had too many symptoms to only be 5 but you never know. I do worry that my body was faking some as I thought I may be.

#IThinkIAmNineButIWillNotKnowForSureUntilADatingScan

Just got to wait for my doctor to call me next week then we can get the ball rolling.

(8th August: I can not believe that I thought I was 9 weeks. I know I just wanted to be further along than I was, but yeah… this photo shows nothing. I was 5 weeks here. I’m a bit embarrassed of this picture, but oh well.)

#ThisPictureIsImitatingAPictureITookOfMyselfInJanuaryWhenIMayHaveBeenSevenWeeksPregnant

I haven’t done the shoot yet, but that is what I intend to copy.

(8th August: Here is the original with hashtags –

A duvet cover hangs in the background as a backdrop. I am facing the left of the image with my hand on my hip. I am wearing a dark blue top and black leggings. Half of my hair is tied up in a messy bun, and I am arching my back.
I Worry When I Do Not Feel Sick (7 Weeks / 23rd January 2021)
 
#IWorryWhenIDoNotFeelSickButThenIRealiseIDoSoThenIDrinkWaterAndIFeelBetter
#SometimesICanFeelASlightTickleInMyTummyButItProbablyJustThingsStartingToStretchAgain
#TheDoctorSaidNotToExpectToHearFromTheHospitalAnytimeSoonButIGotALetterInThePostTwoDaysAfterOurCallSayingToGiveThemARing
#TheySaidThereIsABacklogForAppointmentsDueToCovidButTheyWillDoTheAppointmentsWhenTheyCan
#TheFirstAppointmentWillJustBeOverThePhoneThisTimeToTakeDetailsWhichIsFine
#TheSecondAppointmentWillBeInPersonAndTheyWillDoTheBloodTestsThenAndOtherChecks
#LastTimeTheyTriedToDoABloodTestAtMyFirstAppointmentButTheyCouldNotAsMyBodySaidNo
#ThenTheyMadeMeGoSomewhereElseToGetItDoneButTheySaidItWasAWasteOfTimeAsTheyWouldDoABloodTestAtMyNextAppointmentSoItSeemsLikeABetterStreamlinedProcessThisTime
#ThoughIThinkBecauseItIsMySecondPregnancyTheyAreLessConcernedAndThereAreUsuallyLessAppointments
#NanSaidThatIWasStartingToShowTheOtherDayButIWasWearingATightTopAndIHadNotLongEatenDinner
#IHaveSaidBeforeThatIFindTheTermBabyBrainInsultingButIHaveBeenDoingDaftThingsLately
#HoweverIWasABitLikeThisAtTheBeginningOfMyLastPregnancyAsIThinkIJustHaveALotOnMyMind
#WithBGoingDownToA2NapScheduleIAmStillGettingUsedToWorkingOutTheTimingsAndWorryingAboutBTakesUpABitPartOfMyBrainSpaceRightNow
#IPutAJumperOnInsideOutWithTheLabelAtTheFrontTheOtherDay
#TiagoKeepsForgettingThatIAmPregnant
#WhenIWasPregnantWithBHeKeptTalkingToMyBumpAndWasSoSureThatTheBabyWouldBeABoy
#HeAskedIfThisTimeIfHeCallsItAGirlItWillTurnOutToBeABoy
#WeWillProbablyFindOutTheGenderThisTimeIfWeCanAsIThinkFindingNamesWeBothAgreeOnWillBeAStruggle
#ItWasWeirdHearingTTalkToMyBellyAndMentionItsSisterB
#IAmImaginingBWithTheBabyAndInMyMindItIsRidiculouslyCute
#WeWantedTwoKidsButNowIAmABitLikeWhatHaveWeSignedUpFor
#ItWillBeFineAndWeWillGetUsedToItButItIsOddThinkingOfUsHavingTwoKids
#IStillFindItWeirdThatIHaveAChildAndBIsNow7MonthsOld
#IHopeThatSheLikesHavingASiblingAndThatTheyGetAlong
#IAmStillNervousAboutHowThePregnancyWillGo
#AWomanWhoCallsMeEvery2WeeksToCheckOnMeTaughtMeAGoodMindfulnessExercise
#BasicallyYouSay5ThingsYouCanSee4ThingsYouCanFeel3ThingsYouCanHear2ThingsYouCanSmellAnd1ThingYouCanTaste
#IGuessItIsAGoodCovidTestAsWell
#LookingBackAtMyLastPregnancyProjectItIsAwkwardHowBellyOrientatedItIsButThatIsTheMainThingThatChangesAboutYouWhenYouArePregnant
#ThisShootWillJustBeAboutHavingSomethingToCompareLaterPregnancyTo
 

)

#ItIsWeirdThinkingHowPregnantICouldHaveBeenRightNow

I can’t be bothered to figure it out, but I guess I would have been due in a few months?

#IAmNotLookingForwardToBDroppingANapSoonAsILikeHavingTimeToRestAndDoMyOwnStuffWhenSheSleeps

I’ll just have to change how I do things. I am worried more because of how tired I may be when I am pregnant. If that’s the case then we might need to look into B going to nursery here and there. I am a bit worried that she might miss out on things the more pregnant I get, but we will have to see and I just need to rest more.

#IAmQuiteTiredAndISeemToWakeUpALotInTheNightNowButFindItHardToNapDuringTheDay

I seem to wake up at 5am every day, plus multiple other times. Great.

#IAmNotSureIfThisIsDueToBeingPregnantOrIfItIsBecauseOfTheWeather

It has been HOT this week. Luckily today it is a bit cooler.

#TheOtherDayBeforeITookTheTestTiagoSaidIMustBePregnantAsHeSawAMagpieAndSpokeToIt #WhenHeWasOutsideOfTheHospitalWaitingForNewsOnMeBeforeBWasBornHeSpokeToAMagpieForReassurance #ThisAllSoundsWeirdAndIsVeryUnlikeTiagoButIGuessInAnxiousTimesWeTakeComfortInWhatWeCan

I just had a dig through our old messages…

‘Just had a magpie sitting [on the traffic sign] next to me’

Me: Nice!

‘Asked him twice if he was the bearer of good news and he replied two times and then took off haha’

I just went to ask him about this more recent incident. He said they always come to him with good news, especially on the days he needs it.

#SpeakingOfBirdsAsItHasBeenSoHotBAndMeHaveJustBeenPlayingInTheGardenALot

It’s been too hot to go for walks.

#TheOtherDayIRealisedThatThereIsABlackbirdsNextRightByOurFavouriteSpotInTheShade

I heard cheeping, realised it was close, found the nest…

#FromTimeToTimeWeHaveToMoveAsICanSeeTheParentBlackbirdsWaitingWithFoodInTheirMouths

This is what made me realise that it was a blackbird nest.

#TheyWillNotFlyToTheNestWhileWeAreAroundAsIThinkTheyThinkItIsTopSecretOrSomething

It did take me a while to see it at first. It’s a good spot. Kudos to them.

#IOnlyFoundItAsIHeardTheChicksCheepingAndRealisedTheyWereReallyCloseBy

I can’t see into the nest, so I want to get a stepladder and have a look. I’m somewhat nervous to in case a parent sees me and attacks me.

#SoNowIHaveStartedToTakeBToTheParkMoreAndWeSitInTheShadeThere

We do not want to disturb the birds. It was so hot walking to the park yesterday, but I wanted to get out.

#ItIsLessStressfulAsInTheGardenBHasALeafInHerMouthEveryFiveSeconds

She must have eaten a fair few leaves the other day. She eats some in the park too, but not as much for some reason.

#SheIsGettingCheekierEveryDay

I like it.

#SometimesIPretendToChaseHerAndSheLaughsThoughSheGenerallyJustCrawlsIntoADeadEnd

It’ll be fun as she gets older and realises how to actually crawl away from me.

#NanSaidThatYesterdayBTookAStepAndIDidNotReallyBelieveHer

I don’t know why, but it just seemed hard to believe.

#ThenThisMorningBWasStoodUpInFrontOfMeAndThenDidStepOnce

It was more just stepping her feet wider apart but she has to start somewhere!

#SheIsStillBuildingUpHerStrengthButIsGettingBetterWithHerWalker

The other day she was pushing it and I was pretending to scream and run away from her. She just needs to learn to turn it round/to avoid things.

#SheAlsoHasASecondToothNowWhichMustHaveBeenWhySheKeptWakingUpSoMuchOneNightLastWeek

Two front bottom teeth. I’m not looking forward to all the others coming through if she wakes up as much as she did that night…

#BIsGettingMoreFidgetyAndHarderToChangeSoIDoWorryHowItWillBeIfAndWhenIAmMorePregnant

Fun times ahead.

I say if and when as it is still early days and I am nervous.

#IHaveToSingHerFavouritePortugueseSongsToTryToChillHerOutButTheyDoNotAlwaysWork

I just sing all the songs from this compilation (quite badly and with most of the wrong lyrics. She gets so excited when she can tell that I’m going to put YouTube on.

#IGetNervousEveryTimeIGoToTheBathroom #EspeciallyIfIHaveNotLongHadACramp

I am not looking forward to more months of worry. I want this baby but it is so stressful.

#INeedToRememberThatGoodishCrampsExistTooAsItIsJustASignOfThingsStretching

Stretching and cleaning. My body has a lot of changing to do.

#IAmTryingToBeatMyselfUpLessAboutMyMotheringNow #AsLongAsIAmTryingMyBestThenThatIsAllICanDo

I need to conserve my energy. I worry that B might miss out on things the more pregnant I get but at least we have more support here. Would I be pregnant now if we lived in Liverpool still? Maybe, maybe not.


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Categories
Pregnancy Waiting II

Here We Go Again Again (9 Weeks? / 31st May 2021)

Self-portrait against a plain wall and from the waist up. I'm wearing a dark top with a slight neck that is flopping over. I'm looking directly to the camera and have my hair tied up. My expression is neutral.
Here We Go Again Again (9 Weeks? / 31st May 2021)

#WellIDidAPregnancyTestAnHourOrSoAgoAndItWasPositive #IWasGoingToBeMoreSurprisedIfIWasNotAsItWasJustToCheckWhatIThought #IHaveBeenFeelingSickishForAFewWeeksAndHaveHadOtherSymptoms #SpotsLotsOfSnotReallyReallyTiredSomeDizzinessFeelingMoreEmotional #IWillLookAtBAndStartCryingAsIAmSoHappyToHaveHer #ABigSignIsThatMyPeriodIsUnusuallyLate #IHaveBeenFourDaysLateBeforeButWeArePastThatNowAndYeahItSeemedTimeToDoATest #IWouldHaveDoneItSoonerButWeHaveBeenAwayAndIHaveHadLotsOfWorkToDo #SoIWantedToWaitUntilIHadTimeToDoAShootAndWriteAboutItWhichIsABitSad #WeDidAFamilyShootThenIDidTheTestAndThenITookThePictures #IAmExcitedButNervous #IWantedToWaitAndSeeIfMyPeriodArrivedBeforeDoingATestAsIDidNotWantToBeDisappointedLikeLastTime #IDidHaveSomeSpottingThreeDaysBeforeItWasDueButThatWasIt #SoMaybeThatWasImplantationBleedingButIDoNotThinkIAmOnlyFiveWeeksPregnant #IWasWorriedThatIWasImaginingMorningSicknessSoThatIsAnotherReasonThatIWantedToDelayTakingATest #INeedToBookMyCovidVaccinationsSoIWantToCheckWithMyDoctorAboutItAllFirst #IHopeThisPregnancyGoesWell #IAmWorriedThatSomethingWillGoWrongButItIsWhatItIsAndWeWillHaveToSee #IfTheBabyHappensThenTheyWillBeBornInTheOppositeSeasonToB #WhichMeansThatMyGrandPlanOfPassingHerStuffAlongMightNotCompletelyWork #HerNiceStuffForTheSummerNowWillNotBeGoodForABabyBornInTheWinterWhoWillBeTooSmallForThemButOhWell #AtLeastIWillNotBeHeavilyPregnantInSummer #IDoNotWantToTellPeopleForNow #IWantToKeepItQuietAndThenMaybeJustTalkAboutItIfAndWhenIGetToTwelveWeeks #WhichMightBeSoonOrItMightNot #TheTwelveWeeksThingIsNotGreatAsItFeelsLikeItJustProtectsOtherPeopleFromTheAwkwardnessOfItAllMoreThanMe #AndIWillTalkAboutItWhetherOrNotItProgressesButIGuessSomePeopleDoNotLikeToShareSoMuch #IWonderHowItWillBeHavingTwoKids #IWorryThatItCouldBeTwinsButIReallyDoubtIt #IfBHadHadATwinThatWouldHaveBeenGreatButIDoNotWantTwinsNowThoughIfTwinsHappenThenWeWillGetOnWithItObviously

#WellIDidAPregnancyTestAnHourOrSoAgoAndItWasPositive #IWasGoingToBeMoreSurprisedIfIWasNotAsItWasJustToCheckWhatIThought

Yeah I wasn’t surprised, but it was still a bit weird seeing it confirmed.

I did a first trimester YouTube exercise video this morning (before I knew for sure) so that says a lot. I also did one two days ago…

#IHaveBeenFeelingSickishForAFewWeeksAndHaveHadOtherSymptoms #SpotsLotsOfSnotReallyReallyTiredSomeDizzinessFeelingMoreEmotional

Another weird thing is last time and this time, I felt a need to lie on my front in bed? I feel like I don’t really lie on my front. Maybe it’s an evolutionary thing to protect your stomach? Maybe it’s just all in my head?

#IWillLookAtBAndStartCryingAsIAmSoHappyToHaveHer

I have always loved her, but my love for her has been stronger lately.

Since having B I also find it harder to read sad news stories about kids, but in the last week I have got more emotional – especially about the 5 year old who was the sole survivor of a cable car crash. Even now my eyes are welling up thinking about it.

#ABigSignIsThatMyPeriodIsUnusuallyLate #IHaveBeenFourDaysLateBeforeButWeArePastThatNowAndYeahItSeemedTimeToDoATest

When I was pregnant with B I had a period, and when I was pregnant earlier this year I had had my period, so it now being this late seemed like a clear sign.

#IWouldHaveDoneItSoonerButWeHaveBeenAwayAndIHaveHadLotsOfWorkToDo

Our first night away in 7 months! And yeah so much stuff to do.

#SoIWantedToWaitUntilIHadTimeToDoAShootAndWriteAboutItWhichIsABitSad

I did ask Tiago if we should do it before our trip, but he said ‘nah wait’, which I was relieved about. I knew I was pregnant, but if we had had it confirmed before the trip it would have felt like we were hiding a big secret, and Tiago is not great with secrets (bless him).

#WeDidAFamilyShootThenIDidTheTestAndThenITookThePictures

Everything was set up to take the picture in the same way that I have been doing since we started to try to get pregnant again.

(5th August: The title isn’t a mistake. It references a similar picture I took called ‘Here We Go Again’ in January after I got a positive pregnancy test. I look more shocked in that photo though.)

Here it is:

Self-portrait against a plain wall and from the waist up. I'm wearing a dark top with a slight neck that is flopping over. I'm looking directly to the camera and my hair is down. I have a slightly shocked expression and I am breathing out.
Here We Go Again (6 Weeks / 16th January 2021)
 
#MyHeartIsBeatingSoFast
#IWasPlanningHashtagsInMyHeadAboutDefinitelyNotBeingPregnant
#IHadBeenThinkingAboutTakingATestForTheLastFewDays
#MyPeriodWasSuperHeavyFor2DaysButThenWasReallyLightForAFewDays
#ButIThoughtLastTimeItCompletelyStopped
#IHaveWokenUpFeelingABitSickAFewMornings
#OneWasWhenIWasThinkingAboutPregnancySoIThoughtItWasMyMindPlayingTricksOnMe
#IHaveBeenFeelingQuiteTiredLatelyButIThoughtItWasDownToHavingA7MonthOld
#AndIHaveBeenFeelingQuiteGoodMentallyWhichIThoughtWasDownToMakingAnEffortToBeMorePositive
#IWasThinkingIShouldTakeATestAFewDaysAgoButICouldNotBeBotheredToLookForTheTestAndThoughtIWasBeingSilly
#YesterdayIWentAsFarAsToFindItButThoughtIWouldBeWastingATest
#ThisMorningITookItAsIWasFedUpOfThinkingWellAmIOrAmINotAndIDidNotWantToWaitTwoWeeksToSeeIfMyNextPeriodCame
#IAmInShock
#InThePastIHaveFoundItWeirdThatSomeWomenDoSoManyTestsButIThinkIWillGetTiagoToGetACoupleMore
#TiagoIsHappyAndICouldHearHimSingingToBInPortugueseThatSheMightHaveABrother
#IFeelCautiousAboutItThoughAndDoNotWantToTellPeopleUntilLaterOnThisTime
#IAmWorriedAboutBeingJudgedAboutBeingPregnantAgainSoSoon
#ButForMeItMakesSenseToMeWhileTheWorldIsInLimboAndWeCanNotDoMuch
#TiagoJustCameInToSayIfTheBabyIsDueInAugustThenHowIsHeSupposedToGoToTwoWeddingsOfHisBestFriends
#OneWasPostponedFromThisSummerAndWasTheOneWeWereTryingToAvoidBeingPregnantAroundLastTime
#TheWayThingsAreGoingItMightGetPostponedAgainWhoKnows
#IAmAlreadyWorriedThatSomethingWillGoWrongAsItIsSoEarly
#IHaveBeenContinuingToTakeMyPregnancyAndBreastfeedingVitaminsEvenThoughAsIWasNotPregnantOrBreastfeedingSoAtLeastIDoNotHaveToWorryAboutThat
#IMissedACallFromMyDoctorYesterdayWhoWantsToDoAReviewWithMeOnMondaySoIGuessIWillSayThenThatIAmPregnant
#EvenThoughIWasPregnantNotThatLongAgoIFeelLikeIHaveAlreadyForgottenAboutHowAllTheAppointmentsWork
#PlusNowWeHaveMovedSomewhereElseSoItWillBeSlightlyDifferentAnyways
#IHaveReadThatThereIsNoEvidenceToSayThatTheCovidVaccineIsUnsafeIfYouArePregnant
#ButTheNHSWantMoreEvidenceBeforePregnantPeopleAreRoutinelyOfferedTheVaccine
#IProbablyWouldNotBeCalledToHaveItForALongTimeAnywaysAsIAmInMy30sWithNoHealthIssues
#IAmInShockButINeedToStartRestingMoreForSure

#IAmExcitedButNervous

It is nice to have something to countdown to again. I wanted to learn to drive, but there isn’t much availability. I need to start messaging people as otherwise I will not have much time at all.

#IWantedToWaitAndSeeIfMyPeriodArrivedBeforeDoingATestAsIDidNotWantToBeDisappointedLikeLastTime

This post explains it.

#IDidHaveSomeSpottingThreeDaysBeforeItWasDueButThatWasIt

It was really nothing.

#SoMaybeThatWasImplantationBleedingButIDoNotThinkIAmOnlyFiveWeeksPregnant

I do not think I would be having all these symptoms if I was only 5 weeks, but you never know.

(5th August: I was only 5 weeks pregnant at this point (I’ve recently had a dating scan), but I wanted to believe I was more. Also based on my periods have been before when I’ve been pregnant it seemed like it might add up. I’ve decided to keep the wrong gestation and question marks in the titles as it reflects how I was feeling/what I believed.)

#IWasWorriedThatIWasImaginingMorningSicknessSoThatIsAnotherReasonThatIWantedToDelayTakingATest

I have felt quite sick at times, and not so much at others. I worry that sometimes I think ‘oh shouldn’t I be feeling more sick?’ and then I feel more sick. I do not want to be sick this time though.

#INeedToBookMyCovidVaccinationsSoIWantToCheckWithMyDoctorAboutItAllFirst

Fun times. I think I will be avoiding germ pits like softplay for now while I wait for it.

#IHopeThisPregnancyGoesWell

Fingers crossed.

#IAmWorriedThatSomethingWillGoWrongButItIsWhatItIsAndWeWillHaveToSee

I do not want to spend the whole time feeling as anxious and nervous as I did last time, but I also feel like I need to be realistic about it all, especially as it is still the first trimester.

#IfTheBabyHappensThenTheyWillBeBornInTheOppositeSeasonToB #WhichMeansThatMyGrandPlanOfPassingHerStuffAlongMightNotCompletelyWork #HerNiceStuffForTheSummerNowWillNotBeGoodForABabyBornInTheWinterWhoWillBeTooSmallForThemButOhWell

Me justifying buying nice stuff as it can be passed along = fail. Some stuff will be fine though. The baby could be quite big though – who knows?

#AtLeastIWillNotBeHeavilyPregnantInSummer

Phew.

#IDoNotWantToTellPeopleForNow #IWantToKeepItQuietAndThenMaybeJustTalkAboutItIfAndWhenIGetToTwelveWeeks #WhichMightBeSoonOrItMightNot

I need to call my doctor and see what they think. A lot of the appointments are down to how pregnant you are.

#TheTwelveWeeksThingIsNotGreatAsItFeelsLikeItJustProtectsOtherPeopleFromTheAwkwardnessOfItAllMoreThanMe #AndIWillTalkAboutItWhetherOrNotItProgressesButIGuessSomePeopleDoNotLikeToShareSoMuch

I am debating what to do – this could be a new project as before when I thought I was pregnant I was doing a pregnancy project and continuing with Oh Me, Oh Mãe. Two projects is too much of a faff, especially if one is just trying to hide the fact I am pregnant for a bit longer so this is probably a new project about having a kid and being pregnant. I guess my pregnancy project, OMOM and this are all chapters of a bigger project anyways?

(5th August: I’ve just been working on this project, which shows that I am a little more sure than I was earlier this year when I was working on two. (Well, I have been making a Puke Portraits II.) It is a cross between Waiting and OMOM. I’m calling it Waiting… II for now, but it needs it’s own title. I’ll start thinking…

#IWonderHowItWillBeHavingTwoKids

In the car yesterday I was imagining how it would be with two in the car.

#IWorryThatItCouldBeTwinsButIReallyDoubtIt #IfBHadHadATwinThatWouldHaveBeenGreatButIDoNotWantTwinsNowThoughIfTwinsHappenThenWeWillGetOnWithItObviously

We shall have to wait and see. Time to look after B now.

I am debating including the images/hashtags from when I was a similar gestation with B. However, I did actually manage to write a few blog posts about Waiting, so I’ll just include links to them for now.

Turns out I never did pictures for 5 weeks last time, but the first photo I took was the day after I found out at 4+ weeks so that is similar.

Head to knee self-portrait. I am stood facing the left hand side of the frame. My hair is falling down my right side and I am wearing a black cardigan, black leggings and a dress that is blue with darker blue dots. My hands are in the pockets of the dress and I am pulling it out, as if to imagine what it will be like to have a pregnancy bump.
The Day After I Found Out (4+ weeks)
 
#SoIAmGoingThroughMyPicturesACoupleOfMonthsAfterTryingToEditTheProjectSoFar
#AndApparentlyIHaveBeenWritingHashtagsForEveryShootOnTheDayApartFromThisOne
#WritingThemOnTheDayIsMuchBetterButOhWell
#ILikeThatIAmWearingThisDress
#NotSureIfItWasAnAccidentOrOnPurpose
#ButItIsTheSameDressAsTheOneIAmWearingInMyPictureCalled
#ItSeemsLikeEveryoneIsPregnantExceptMe
#InMySeriesCalledUlteriorMonologue
#WhichIsAboutWantingToTalkAboutWantingToBePregnantButFeelingTooAwkwardTo
#TheDayBeforeWeHadGoneFoodShopping
#IHadBoughtCheeseThatYouAreNotSupposedToEatIfYouArePregnant
#AndTwoPregnancyTests
#IBoughtTheTestsAsIMyPeriodWasLateAndIWasHopeful
#ButBoughtTheCheeseAsIWasNotThatHopeful
#WellActuallyIWasConfusedAsItHadStartedAndStopped
#IOnlyHadATinyBitOfTheCheeseAsIWasLikeWellWhatIf
#AndThenTriedToDoATest
#ButForgotIWasGoingToDoOne
#SoIWasJustInTheBathroomForAgesDrinkingLotsOfWaterAndWaiting
#FunTimes
#ThenICameOutOfTheBathroomInShockIThink
#AndCalledTiagoIntoTheBathroomAsWeWereAtMyNans
#HeSaidHeDidNotEvenKnowWhatWasTheResultByLookingAtTheTest
#WritingThisNowIHaveABitOfABump
#OnTheDayITookAPictureOfMyBellyAndToBeFairIThoughtILookedABitPregnant
#ButMyBellyUsuallyLookedLikeThat
#AndNowIKnowMyFoodBabiesLookABitDifferentToABabyBump
#ButFoodBabiesWithABabyBumpJustLookLikeABigBabyBump
#AnywaysHereIWasAbout4AndABitWeeksPregnantOrSoTheFolderTellsMe
#IFindItOddTheWayTheyCalculateItAsPartOfThatIWasNotPregnant

I thought I might as well just add the image and hashtags in. The picture is definitely more interesting than this new one, but oh well.


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Categories
Oh Me, Oh Mãe

Ninth Family Portrait (31st May 2021)

Family portrait. Tiago and me are sat on the floor and B is sat on Tiago's lap wth one hand resting on T's arm, and one one resting on my arm.
Ninth Family Portrait (31st May 2021)
 
#WellThisWeekendWeHadOurFirstNightAwayFromMyNansHouseSinceWeMovedIn
#ICanNotBelieveThatWeHaveBeenLivingHereForSevenMonthsAlready
#IWasSupposedToWriteAListOfThingsToTakeButOfCourseIDidNotAndWeForgotAFewThings
#TheMostMajorThingWasBsNoiseMachineThatPlaysWhileSheSleeps
#WeUsedMyPhoneForNapsAndThenTiagosForTheNight
#OfCourseTheBatteryDiedButIThinkBOnlyWokeUpVeryBrieflySoThatWasGood
#WeWentToLiverpoolAsWeAreStillInTouchWithPeopleFromOurNCTGroup
#AndTheFirstBirthdayPartiesAreStartingToHappenSoWeWentForAJointParty
#ItWasAShameThatNotEveryoneCouldBeThereForItWasNiceToSeeSixOfThemTogether
#BWasSuperShyWhenWeArrivedAndHeldBackOnOurPicnicBlanket
#AfterAWhileSheWasQuiteContentCrawlingRoundPickingUpEveryonesBearShapedPotatoSnacks
#ItRemindedMeOfGoingToSchoolDiscosAndJustSeeingHowManyBagsOfCrispsICouldEat
#ThePartyHatsDidNotLastLongButTheyAllSeemedToEnjoyThemselvesAndItWasNiceToCatchUpWithTheOtherParents
#TheNextDayWeWentToMeetFriendsInTheCentreToHaveLunch
#ItWasBsFirstMealAtARestaurantAndOurFirstSinceMovingToBirmingham
#SheJustHadBitsOfOurFoodAndIShouldHaveTakenAPictureOfHerCoveredInTomatoSauce
#ItWasSoHotOut
#LuckilyTheRestaurantManagedToGiveUsSomeShadeAsIWasWorriedAboutBGettingTooHot
#IThoughtItWouldHaveBeenReallyHotAtTheBirthdayPartyButItWasNotSoIDidNotDressAppropriately
#LiverpoolLookedLikeItWasBackToNormalAsThereWereSoManyPeople
#WeWantedToGetAPictureWithTheBeatlesStatueButItWasTooBusy
#IFeelAwkwardHavingAPhotoTakenWithSoManyPeopleWatchingToo
#WeWentToOpenEyeGalleryBrieflyToSeeFriends
#WeUsedTheBabyChangingFacilitiesAndItWasTheFirstTimeWeHaveChangedHerNappyInAPublicPlaceSinceMovingIThink
#WePlannedToGetOnTheRoadWhenItWasTimeForBsSecondNapSoSheCouldSleepInTheCar
#OfCourseInTheEndWeLeftReallyLate
#BWasOvertiredAndCriedALotInTheCar
#SheEndedUpSleepingFor10MinutesAboutTwoHoursLaterThanSheShouldHave
#ThoughIWasABitRelievedAsIWasWorriedSheWouldNeedASuperLateBedtimeByThatPoint
#HerRoomWasHotWhenWeGotBackSoWeTriedPuttingHerInAShortSleevedVestAndLuckilySheSleptTheWholeNight

2nd August: I’m not totally sure on the photo editing. I had edited it differently, but I did not like it. I prefer this, but I’m still not sure. I like how B has one hand on Tiago and one on me though.

#WellThisWeekendWeHadOurFirstNightAwayFromMyNansHouseSinceWeMovedIn #ICanNotBelieveThatWeHaveBeenLivingHereForSevenMonthsAlready

I was anxious about it all, but it was nice to get away and see people.

#IWasSupposedToWriteAListOfThingsToTakeButOfCourseIDidNotAndWeForgotAFewThings

All that packing for one night… We took way too much stuff but I would rather take too much than too little. It took me a minute to remember how B’s cot folds up, but I managed it.

I do need to make a list for day trips and overnight stays though.

#TheMostMajorThingWasBsNoiseMachineThatPlaysWhileSheSleeps

Great. I remember saying to myself that I needed to pack it. Annoyingly I had gone in her room and noticed that I nearly forgot to take her nappies, but the noise machine is tucked out of the way.

#WeUsedMyPhoneForNapsAndThenTiagosForTheNight

This is what we played.

#OfCourseTheBatteryDiedButIThinkBOnlyWokeUpVeryBrieflySoThatWasGood

T’s phone needed to be charged so we had it plugged in for a bit, but we were worried about it being on all night so T went in to turn it off, and of course his phone died.

I did hear her briefly wake up at one point and that might have been why. It was good that she slept without it, but I thought with other people around it was a good idea to use it.

#WeWentToLiverpoolAsWeAreStillInTouchWithPeopleFromOurNCTGroup

NCT being the National Childcare Trust. We did a course with them to learn about looking after a baby, but also as we wanted to meet people as we didn’t know many people in Liverpool. And then we left.

#AndTheFirstBirthdayPartiesAreStartingToHappenSoWeWentForAJointParty

We can’t go to all of the parties (if it was a shorter drive then we would do), so it was nice that there was one for three of them. Shame we don’t have a group like them in Birmingham.

#ItWasAShameThatNotEveryoneCouldBeThereForItWasNiceToSeeSixOfThemTogether

The last time we saw some of them they were very small and not doing much. Now they are all crawling, standing up and one was walking! There are eight in total.

#BWasSuperShyWhenWeArrivedAndHeldBackOnOurPicnicBlanket

She just buried her head in it. I think it was because we were next to a lot of Dads and she doesn’t really see a lot of men. She’s usually less shy if there are a lot of babies around.

#AfterAWhileSheWasQuiteContentCrawlingRoundPickingUpEveryonesBearShapedPotatoSnacks

I don’t let B eat a lot of salt so she was in heaven. She was also eating a lot of triangular shaped adult snacks. I was surprised she ate so much dinner afterwards…

#ItRemindedMeOfGoingToSchoolDiscosAndJustSeeingHowManyBagsOfCrispsICouldEat

I think I ate seven once. Classy me.

#ThePartyHatsDidNotLastLongButTheyAllSeemedToEnjoyThemselvesAndItWasNiceToCatchUpWithTheOtherParents

They looked cute with them on. B’s was too big for her so I had to tie a knot in it.

#TheNextDayWeWentToMeetFriendsInTheCentreToHaveLunch

It was weird parking there as we always walked from home when we lived there.

#ItWasBsFirstMealAtARestaurantAndOurFirstSinceMovingToBirmingham

It seemed like a big occasion. I took no photos.

#SheJustHadBitsOfOurFoodAndIShouldHaveTakenAPictureOfHerCoveredInTomatoSauce

We looked at getting a meal for her, but we thought she would have barely eaten it. They had a kids menu, but it seemed for a lot older kids.

#ItWasSoHotOut

I had to take my shoes off as I was melting.

#LuckilyTheRestaurantManagedToGiveUsSomeShadeAsIWasWorriedAboutBGettingTooHot

And someone let us move as I could not have sat in the sun for that long.

#IThoughtItWouldHaveBeenReallyHotAtTheBirthdayPartyButItWasNotSoIDidNotDressAppropriately

It was fairly cold at the park for the party, so I thought the next day would be more of the same. I had shaved my legs in a hurry before we left Brum and cut my ankle quite badly (I’ve never cut myself that much shaving in my life). If I had known it would have been so hot I would have had no leggings on and worn sandals. Oh well. That’s what we get for being away from home and not checking the weather as much.

#LiverpoolLookedLikeItWasBackToNormalAsThereWereSoManyPeople

I was surprised on a day so hot that people were in the centre. I would have chilled in a park or a garden or something… but we had plans and they did too.

#WeWantedToGetAPictureWithTheBeatlesStatueButItWasTooBusy

Gone again are the days of it being super quiet. I guess it was a weekend and it was hot. I used to walk past it with B everyday on our walks.

#IFeelAwkwardHavingAPhotoTakenWithSoManyPeopleWatchingToo

There’s also a queue of people watching and yeah I find it awkward.

#WeWentToOpenEyeGalleryBrieflyToSeeFriends

We wanted to go for longer but it was already getting late.

#WeUsedTheBabyChangingFacilitiesAndItWasTheFirstTimeWeHaveChangedHerNappyInAPublicPlaceSinceMovingIThink

Bit weird to say, but again it feels worth mentioning. Our friends said they could hear B singing/talking from the reception area.

#WePlannedToGetOnTheRoadWhenItWasTimeForBsSecondNapSoSheCouldSleepInTheCar

We travelled to Liverpool when it was time for her first nap. We had left a little earlier and the first wake window is meant to be 2 hours 45 minutes to 3 hours. She fell asleep pretty much on 2 hours 45 minutes.

#OfCourseInTheEndWeLeftReallyLate

We know she can get away with being awake a little longer if she has to.

#BWasOvertiredAndCriedALotInTheCar

I was hoping to have a nap myself and read more of Pregnant Then Screwed, instead I was doing a lot of singing and stressing out.

#SheEndedUpSleepingFor10MinutesAboutTwoHoursLaterThanSheShouldHave

She woke up crying a lot. 🙁

#ThoughIWasABitRelievedAsIWasWorriedSheWouldNeedASuperLateBedtimeByThatPoint

You can’t win can you?

#HerRoomWasHotWhenWeGotBackSoWeTriedPuttingHerInAShortSleevedVestAndLuckilySheSleptTheWholeNight

Lighter sleeping bag or shorter sleeved top? We went for shorter sleeved top and it seemed okay. If it’s this hot in May I am worried for August, but we’ll hopefully get better at judging what she needs to wear.


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